Healing my Heart: Book 2 - My Heart Series

by Michelle, Aleya

  Kade rubs his hands down my breasts and squeezes one firmly, his fingers find my nipple now rock hard and flicks it and squeezes.

  My core is wet, warm and throbbing for him. He pulls back from my lips as he kisses my neck, in small soft kisses up to my ear lobe where he bites down hard.

  “You are always in my thoughts too Roxy” he tells me referring to my letter that I didn’t even realise Jemma posted.

  He hasn’t forgotten that my ear is a sensitive spot of mine either. He licks inside it and blows with his hot breath and my wetness increases as I dig my nails harder into his back, making him flinch and chuckle into my ear.

  We are in darkness just him and I. I’ve forgotten about the rest of the world, it is just Kade and me.

  He rubs his hand along my stomach under my singlet top touching my naked skin, those rough calloused hands that I remember. He pulls on my belt with his other hand and rubs along my bikini line, digging his hand in further and further into my tight jeans. His thumb flicks and rubs along my groin though my G-string.

  I kiss the soft skin on his neck, scent of his aftershave so addictive. His wandering finger makes his way to my entrance under the silk of my panties. He pushes his finger inside my folds causing me to flinch and jump. “Kade,” I say into his neck.

  “Fuck Roxy, you are so wet for me, always so wet for me,” he whispers in my ear and licks and bites my lobes. His finger is now circling around and around inside me. He adds a second finger into my dripping wetness and his thumb flicks my clit. “Fuck,” I say trying to keep quiet but so turned on and close to my release. I breathe a big breath out as his fingers move faster, deeper and harder.

  “Oh yes, yes,” I moan into his neck and I bite as I rock and shake riding my orgasm on Kade’s hand, convulsing and coming undone with my much needed release.

  “Come again for me baby,” he says into my ear and continues with his assault, over and over adding another finger and working faster still, as orgasm number two hits me even more powerful and earthshattering than the last. I see fireworks as I come again onto his hand with my juices coating his fingers and my legs feeling wobbly. Kade’s hand is on my back holding me up. He kisses my lips softly and I smile, such a heartfelt smile. I’m feeling satisfied and so happy that he is here.

  And then boom. Reality hits.

  “Roxy, quick are you out here?” I hear a girl’s voice calling me from the back exit.

  “Oh shit,” I whisper into Kade’s neck as he removes his hand and pulls down my shirt.

  “I have to go,” I say regretfully to him.

  “Tomorrow Roxy. I am coming over tomorrow,” he says into my ear as he kisses my lips and walks around the side of the building, thankfully out of sight.

  I straighten myself up and wonder who it is calling out to me. I hold my phone up to my ear to make it seem legit why I am out here in the dark all alone.

  I walk around the corner and it’s Leisa, Charles fiancée with a very worried look on her face.

  “I’ll have to call you back Jemma,” I lie into the phone to the imaginary Jemma.

  “What’s wrong Leisa?” I ask her concerned now as well.

  “It’s Dylan he just hit Michael and we just can’t control him. He is asking for you Roxy,” she tells me her voice sounding shaky. Fucking hell…

  “I’m coming, so sorry. I guess it’s just when he drinks too much he goes overboard,” I say to her lying through my teeth and hating myself for it. He is not your responsibility Roxy, cut him loose…

  I run with her into the restaurant where I see the men struggling to hold a crazy Dylan back. Far out he just can’t go anywhere lately without fighting. I really need to find his mother and fill her in on everything that’s for sure…

  Running up to Dylan I call out to him, “Dylan calm down. I’m here, just calm down okay?” I hold onto his hand as he looks into my eyes, I see the blue eyes but they are empty, shallow, he has become a shell of the man he used to be.

  “Sorry guys, I’ll take him home,” I say to Charles and the others and now I realise I’m stuck with the responsibility. Fuck.

  So much for only being two hours with the guy.

  And the last twenty minutes of pleasure with Kade now ruined. But the one thing I’m smiling about is that I can still smell Kade on me, feel his touch on my skin and taste him on my lips, I walk away happy knowing that.

  I collect my handbag and notice a fortune cookie on my place setting so I crack it open. My fortune reads - Home is where your heart is.

  Fuck me.

  I think of the song “It Feels Like Home To Me” by Chantal Kreviazuk and my heart sinks...

  My heart of hearts lies in the arms of my one and only true love, Kade Thomas.

  Chapter 18

  Kade the Private Investigator

  After all these months dreaming about her, I finally got to kiss those perfect lips again, touch her velvet soft skin and inhale her fruity, edible scent.

  I couldn’t believe it when Emma told me Roxy was at the Silver Jade restaurant, the very same place we were eating at, the heavens above were sending me a message that’s for sure.

  First seeing her at the club and now here… I couldn’t help but send her a sneaky text message and when she replied she had broken up with that tool, well fuck, I felt bloody marvellous.

  It hurt just to see him with my girl. The way he was looking at Roxy, he has got it bad for her, and now that I know it’s all one sided makes me all warm and gooey.

  Thank Christ he wasn’t all touchy feely all over her. I would have broken his jaw if I saw him touching her, but I couldn’t do it to Roxy. I don’t know the details of why they broke up or why she was there with him. One thing I did notice was that she looked so rigid around him, tense and turned off just having to sit next to him. That’s what I wanted to see but, I can’t help but wonder what the reason is.

  She would melt with my touch, her body would mould into my arms, my fingers would send goose bumps along her sexy tanned skin. I am so relieved they are no longer together. I would have felt gutted.

  But there’s that feeling of something being not quite right. I can’t put my finger on it, she didn’t look miserable. Damn, I can still remember her face when I ended us. So shocked, pale, zapped from life and with such sad eyes. There wasn’t any of that - she was more like a zombie, numb even. Is she faking it with him? Does he have something over her?

  I intend on climbing into bed with her scent on me, the thought of her lips and tongue on my neck, biting me. My fingers were back inside her and damn she was dripping wet, such a turn on. Her moans as she came for me not once, but twice.

  Tomorrow, I told her I would see her. I feel so god damn happy at the thought of seeing her beautiful face again, only around eight more hours and I’ll be calling her. You can bet your life on it.

  And as for the ex, I can’t believe he started a fight at his friend’s party. I will be keeping an eye on this Dylan guy, he can count on that.

  A hawk, I will watch him like a fucking hawk.

  Chapter 19

  Life’s a Beach

  After a much later evening than I was expecting, which also included a stop at the apartment to collect Dan and Jemma to help me expel a very drunk, heavy Dylan from my car.

  My skin is covered in goose bumps from Kade’s touch; my sensations are on high alert.

  I don’t shower before crawling in the warm oasis of my bed, to keep the rugged aroma of a sexy surfer etched in my skin. Surprisingly I slept the best I have in months, thinking of his touch, his warmth and feeling safe in his embrace. Maybe it was the two orgasms that helped me relax? I smirk to myself.

  The next morning I am thoroughly enjoying lazing in my cushiony bed. I believe I deserve it after the emotionally draining night and now the endless thoughts I have running havoc through my mind.

  I unwelcomely hear my iPhone beep, and assuming it will be Dylan. I am already unimpressed with what the contents of his message will entail.

>   “Damn it,” I say to myself as I extend my hand to my bedside table for the phone.

  I am a little taken back, by what I see on the screen…

  Good morning beautiful.

  So...

  Last night was fun...

  Are you feeling up for a day at the beach?

  It’s from Kade, not Dylan but Kade!

  I blissfully wiggle around on my bed, bouncing and jumping up and down, with excitement. Oh my god it’s happening, it’s really happening! I pinch myself on the arm.

  Is this real? Or is this a dream?

  I text him back, my hand shaking slightly from the adrenaline running through my veins.

  Good morning to you too.

  Ha ha, yes I had A LOT of fun last night...

  I guess I could work on my tan at the beach.

  I reply casually to him. Come on I still have to keep him on his toes right? In all honestly there is so much to talk about. He can’t just expect to win me back so easily. He needs to work for me, prove himself and show me he is around for the long haul.

  The thought of heartbreak again scares the shit outta me. The physical and emotional pain, my heart still has an open wound. But then again, the passion between the two of us is so intense and steaming hot it’s hard to control.

  It is probably best if I meet you there, which beach? Oh actually is there one a little more secluded? You know the whole Dylan thing is messy.

  I can’t help but wonder what his thoughts are on Dylan, well probably after seeing him cause a scene last night he will probably have twenty questions for me.

  He replies instantly.

  Yep good idea. Meet me at Collins Beach; it’s on Collins Beach Road, Manly.

  Oh and secluded , I like your way of thinking Rox. That sounds like we could get up to all kinds of mischief for our eyes only.

  He messages back adding in the cheekiness that we both do so well.

  In your dreams surfer boy.

  I text him back keeping up with the sarcasm, but I’m seriously wondering how the hell will I be able to keep my hands off his bronzed, toned body.

  And the funny thing is that he knows that about me all too well…

  I slowly pull my little blue car into a sandy embankment at Collins Beach, not a car park as such but it will do the job.

  Kade was right about it being secluded. The beach is silent except for the crashing of the waves against the shore. That sound is one that I have missed dearly. I have arrived around fifteen minutes early so I climb out and take in the splendid sights around me.

  A hot sea breeze rustles my hair, smelling of fresh salt water. I discard my thongs and the sand between my toes is welcoming and soft.

  I take in the view of the ocean, its aquamarine colour, waves rolling in one after the other in sequence. The ripples of whitewash flows freely, across the rock pools. I hear the roar of the waves, it echoes on the rocks in the distance. No wonder the beach is home to Kade, it is a place of refuge and relaxation.

  There is a flock of seagulls squawking above, swarming around like bees to honey, hoping for a fish or two for their lunch. They each have white plumage with each individual print of grey, brown or black. Their wingspan is wide with layers of soft feathers. Oh to be a bird, free from it all. I wish.

  Then a much more spectacular sight interrupts my view, one I warmly welcome with a wide smile.

  “Hi,” he says with an enormous grin, cheeky as always and dazzling me with his ivory smile.

  “Hi yourself,” I reply feeling giddy as my smile beams from his presence.

  He is wearing casual dark blue board shorts that hang below his knees, showing me the defined muscles in his calves and his bronzed tan is accentuated by his white billabong t-shirt, snug in all the right places.

  My eyes can’t help but stare and linger at his toned and tanned arms, and his chiselled face, slightly stubbled. I could never forget his ruggedly handsome face that I once loved so much.

  Seeing him last night in the darkness, it really didn’t do him one bit of justice.

  In the brightness of day he is a god, one extremely good looking, sexy man and those hazelnut coloured eyes glistening in the sunlight, are doing all kinds of things to my insides.

  He sits down on the sand easing his muscular frame in beside me. I smell his aftershave and have to shake my head to stop from inhaling too deep or I will be putty in his hands.

  “Beautiful spot here,” I state trying to break the ice a little.

  “It definitely is a beautiful beach. Didn’t I ever bring you here?” he asks me shocked, assuming he would have in our time together.

  “No, I haven’t been here before. I wouldn’t forget a place like this,” I reply with truthfulness. I am in awe of the amazing beach.

  “No one could forget something so beautiful,” he says to me looking deep into my eyes obviously not talking about the beach any longer. I feel enraptured by his comment, such a sweet line. I can’t help but look away, it’s too much too soon. Isn’t it?

  “Roxy, look at me please. I know you have never forgiven me, but I think it’s time we talked about what happened with us,” he tells me as he grabs my hand sweetly.

  I feel sparks ignite up my arm and I notice him smile as the goose bumps are evident on his skin, obviously feeling it too. I can’t help but smile back at him, it is addictive that smile of his. Sexy as hell and addictive.

  “Okay I’m all ears, so talk,” I remark to him trying to sound somewhat serious, but feeling extremely nervous as to what he is going to say and the memories and raw emotions that are going to resurface.

  “Okay, well here goes,” Kade starts off by saying.

  “You will never know how sorry I am for ever leaving you Roxy. I did still love you, and I honestly thought it was best for me at the time. Best for my dad and best for you. But now I see it was all a huge mistake. I never should have left the BEST thing that ever happened to me,” he tells me with such heartfelt emotion that a tear falls down my cheek.

  He just said I was the best thing that ever happened to him.

  “You really mean that?” I question his sincerity and charming words that I’ve been longing to hear.

  “One hundred percent. I don’t go a single day without thinking about you Roxy, about us, the way we were and what could have been. I kick myself for hurting you. I hate myself for what I did to you,” he adds and I feel my heart swell with love, for his words and for the amazing man sitting here spilling his heart and feelings out to me.

  I can’t quite think of the right words to say back to him, I’m shocked and overwhelmed from his admittance.

  I squeeze his hand gently, trying to show him that what he has said was what I needed to hear, that I’m happy. I smile and bite my lip as I lean into him and snuggle into his side, feeling his warmth.

  We sit this way for a long time, I am lost in the moment. I pull back as he looks into my eyes and I can’t hold back any longer. I lovingly lean in and kiss his lips, showing him just how I feel, the best way I know how, he deepens the kiss and it’s amazing how it makes me feel more alive and secure than I have since he left.

  He pulls me in tight, kissing me harder, caressing my face and I can’t get close enough to him. I rub my fingers along his skin, it is so smooth. I run my fingers through his hair and push him to the sand to lie on top of him, trying to get as close as possible. All these months of frustration have caught up to me. I need him, want him and I can’t take it anymore.

  “I need you Kade, make love to me,” I whisper in his ear with urgency that I can no longer fight. It is what we do to show how deep our feelings go.

  He stops and looks into my eyes with surprise and lust.

  “Here Roxy?” he asks me now breathless obviously thinking about my smouldering request.

  I stand and hold onto his hand as I pull him to a standing position, then as I drag him over my car and into the back seat. We chuckle like school kids taking a sneaky day off school.

  �
�The beach would have been perfect but I could just imagine a car full of teenagers turning up and seeing me butt naked,” I joke to him as I lie down and pull him on top of me.

  He closes the car door and pulls his shirt off over his head exposing his hard chest.

  “God Kade, do you know how seriously hot that body of yours is?” I can’t help but say drooling as I take in his curves.

  “I need to see yours Roxy, it has been way too long,” he tells me practically undressing me with his eyes as he pulls up my purple singlet top revealing my frilly pink triangle bikini. I help him pull it over my head as he kisses my neck and skin, his tongue trailing across my skin. He pulls the cords on my bikini and rips it down revealing my breasts.

  “Damn I’ve missed these glorious tits Roxy, do you know that?” he asks me and the huskiness of his voice gets me wetter instantly. As he sucks firmly on one nipple, a moan escapes my mouth.

  I playfully rub my hands along his abs feeling each crevice, each finely tuned muscle. My hands roam to his back I dig my nails along and I feel his skin turn to goose bumps. I reach down under his shorts to feel his arse. His skin so smooth, but firm so I squeeze hard and dig my nails in.

  “Damn Rox,” he tells me chuckling obviously enjoying my handy work.

  He nibbles on my other nipple, flicking it with his tongue. I push my core up into his erection showing him what I want. I reach my hands up to his board shorts and unfasten the Velcro and whip them down fast as I can showing his royal blue boxer briefs and the unmistakeable large bulge forming a nice arch.

  “Happy to see me?” I joke to Kade as he looks into my eyes and smirks.

  “You have no fucking idea Roxy,” he replies with intenseness and veracity that makes my breath hitch. I rub his hardness though his pants. “Mmm,” he moans so I rub over harder and squeeze his thickness.

  He starts to pull down my tiny board shorts exposing my bikini bottoms. I didn’t intend on swimming but wanted to look the part for the beach. Kade starts to kiss up one leg with soft kisses, up to my hot pink swimmer pants.