The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)

by William Shakespeare

  Then by the lawful power that I have

  Thou shalt stand curs'd and excommunicate;

  And blessed shall he be that doth revolt

  From his allegiance to an heretic;

  And meritorious shall that hand be call'd,

  Canonized, and worshipp'd as a saint,

  That takes away by any secret course

  Thy hateful life.

  Then by the power invested in me

  I say you are cursed and excommunicated;

  anyone who revolts against his allegiance

  to a heretic shall be blessed;

  and anyone who takes away your

  revolting life by any means at all

  shall be called a deserving man

  and shall be canonised and worshipped as a saint.

  CONSTANCE.

  O, lawful let it be

  That I have room with Rome to curse awhile!

  Good father Cardinal, cry thou 'amen'

  To my keen curses; for without my wrong

  There is no tongue hath power to curse him right.

  Oh, let it be legal

  for me to join in with Rome in this cursing!

  Good father Cardinal, cry out “amen"

  to my sharp curses; for without my wrongs

  your tongue does not have the power to curse him rightly.

  PANDULPH.

  There's law and warrant, lady, for my curse.

  I have legal justification and permission, lady, for my curse.

  CONSTANCE.

  And for mine too; when law can do no right,

  Let it be lawful that law bar no wrong;

  Law cannot give my child his kingdom here,

  For he that holds his kingdom holds the law;

  Therefore, since law itself is perfect wrong,

  How can the law forbid my tongue to curse?

  And for mine too; when the law cannot do right,

  let it be lawful for it not to bar any wrong;

  law cannot give my child his kingdom here,

  because the one who rules the kingdom makes the laws;

  so, since the law itself is completely wrong,

  how can the law ban me from cursing?

  PANDULPH.

  Philip of France, on peril of a curse,

  Let go the hand of that arch-heretic,

  And raise the power of France upon his head,

  Unless he do submit himself to Rome.

  Philip of France, unless you want to be cursed,

  release the hand of that arch heretic,

  and attack him with the forces of France,

  unless he bows down to Rome.

  ELINOR.

  Look'st thou pale, France? Do not let go thy hand.

  Why are you looking pale, France? Don't release his hand.

  CONSTANCE.

  Look to that, devil, lest that France repent

  And by disjoining hands hell lose a soul.

  The devil wants that, in case France should repent

  and by releasing his hand hell will lose a soul.

  AUSTRIA.

  King Philip, listen to the Cardinal.

  King Philip, listen to the Cardinal.

  BASTARD.

  And hang a calf's-skin on his recreant limbs.

  And put a calfskin on his cowardly limbs.

  AUSTRIA.

  Well, ruffian, I must pocket up these wrongs,

  Because-

  Well, scoundrel, I must put these insults in my pocket,

  because–

  BASTARD.

  Your breeches best may carry them.

  Your trousers are the best place for them.

  KING JOHN.

  Philip, what say'st thou to the Cardinal?

  Philip, how will you answer the cardinal?

  CONSTANCE.

  What should he say, but as the Cardinal?

  What can he say, except what the cardinal says?

  LEWIS.

  Bethink you, father; for the difference

  Is purchase of a heavy curse from Rome

  Or the light loss of England for a friend.

  Forgo the easier.

  Think carefully, father; on the one hand

  you could get a heavy curse from Rome,

  on the other is the easy loss of England as a friend.

  Take the easier course.

  BLANCH.

  That's the curse of Rome.

  That's accepting the curse of Rome.

  CONSTANCE.

  O Lewis, stand fast! The devil tempts thee here

  In likeness of a new untrimmed bride.

  Oh Louis, be strong! The devil is tempting you,

  disguised as a virgin bride.

  BLANCH.

  The Lady Constance speaks not from her faith,

  But from her need.

  Lady Constance isn't saying what she believes,

  she's speaking according to what she wants.

  CONSTANCE.

  O, if thou grant my need,

  Which only lives but by the death of faith,

  That need must needs infer this principle-

  That faith would live again by death of need.

  O then, tread down my need, and faith mounts up:

  Keep my need up, and faith is trodden down!

  O, if you give me what I want,

  which I'm only lacking due to faithlessness,

  then you must need to think of this–

  that faith would live again if the want was removed.

  So, give me what I want, and faith increases:

  reject me, and you trample on faith.

  KING JOHN.

  The King is mov'd, and answers not to this.

  The King is disturbed, and doesn't answer this.

  CONSTANCE.

  O be remov'd from him, and answer well!

  Oh, step away from him, and answer well!

  AUSTRIA.

  Do so, King Philip; hang no more in doubt.

  Do so, King Philip; don't stand there doubting.

  BASTARD.

  Hang nothing but a calf's-skin, most sweet lout.

  Dressed in nothing but a calfskin, you sweet lout.

  KING PHILIP.

  I am perplex'd and know not what to say.

  I am confused and don't know what to say.

  PANDULPH.

  What canst thou say but will perplex thee more,

  If thou stand excommunicate and curs'd?

  What if what you say makes you more confused

  by making you excommunicated and cursed?

  KING PHILIP.

  Good reverend father, make my person yours,

  And tell me how you would bestow yourself.

  This royal hand and mine are newly knit,

  And the conjunction of our inward souls

  Married in league, coupled and link'd together

  With all religious strength of sacred vows;

  The latest breath that gave the sound of words

  Was deep-sworn faith, peace, amity, true love,

  Between our kingdoms and our royal selves;

  And even before this truce, but new before,

  No longer than we well could wash our hands,

  To clap this royal bargain up of peace,

  Heaven knows, they were besmear'd and overstain'd

  With slaughter's pencil, where revenge did paint

  The fearful difference of incensed kings.

  And shall these hands, so lately purg'd of blood,

  So newly join'd in love, so strong in both,

  Unyoke this seizure and this kind regreet?

  Play fast and loose with faith? so jest with heaven,

  Make such unconstant children of ourselves,

  As now again to snatch our palm from palm,

  Unswear faith sworn, and on the marriage-bed

  Of smiling peace to march a bloody host,

  And make a riot on the gentle brow

  Of true sincerity? O, holy sir,

  My rever
end father, let it not be so!

  Out of your grace, devise, ordain, impose,

  Some gentle order; and then we shall be blest

  To do your pleasure, and continue friends.

  Good reverend father, put yourself in my position,

  and tell me how you would behave.

  I have only just joined hands with this King,

  and our souls have been joined together,

  sworn to work for each other

  with all the religious strength of sacred vows;

  the last thingthat I have said

  was to swear faithfully to peace, friendship and true love

  between our kingdoms and ourselves.

  And just before this truce, just recently,

  no sooner than we could wash our hands

  to seal this royal bargain of peace,

  heaven knows, they were smeared and stained

  with the blood of slaughter, revenge showing

  how terrible disagreement is between angry kings:

  should these hands, so recently cleansed of blood,

  so newly joined in friendship, both so faithful,

  undo their clasp and their kind bond?

  Cheat with faith? Should we joke with heaven,

  be such unfaithful children of God

  that we would now take our hands apart,

  unswear what we have sworn, and on the marriage bed

  of sweet peace march a bloody army,

  and cause a riot on the gentle forehead

  of true sincerity? Oh, holy Sir,

  my reverend father, don't make me do this!

  From your grace invent, decree, impose

  some less strict order, and then we will have the blessing

  of doing as you wish and remaining friends.

  PANDULPH.

  All form is formless, order orderless,

  Save what is opposite to England's love.

  Therefore, to arms! be champion of our church,

  Or let the church, our mother, breathe her curse-

  A mother's curse-on her revolting son.

  France, thou mayst hold a serpent by the tongue,

  A chafed lion by the mortal paw,

  A fasting tiger safer by the tooth,

  Than keep in peace that hand which thou dost hold.

  All ceremony is powerless, there is no order

  except in being the opposite of friends with England.

  So, to battle! Be the champion of our church,

  or let the church, our mother, say her curse–

  a mother's curse–against her revolting son.

  France, you would be safer holding a snake by the tongue,

  an angry lion by his killing paw,

  a hungry tiger by his tooth,

  than to remain at peace with that hand which you are holding.

  KING PHILIP.

  I may disjoin my hand, but not my faith.

  I can break my grip, but not my promise.

  PANDULPH.

  So mak'st thou faith an enemy to faith;

  And like. a civil war set'st oath to oath.

  Thy tongue against thy tongue. O, let thy vow

  First made to heaven, first be to heaven perform'd,

  That is, to be the champion of our Church.

  What since thou swor'st is sworn against thyself

  And may not be performed by thyself,

  For that which thou hast sworn to do amiss

  Is not amiss when it is truly done;

  And being not done, where doing tends to ill,

  The truth is then most done not doing it;

  The better act of purposes mistook

  Is to mistake again; though indirect,

  Yet indirection thereby grows direct,

  And falsehood cures, as fire cools fire

  Within the scorched veins of one new-burn'd.

  It is religion that doth make vows kept;

  But thou hast sworn against religion

  By what thou swear'st against the thing thou swear'st,

  And mak'st an oath the surety for thy truth

  Against an oath; the truth thou art unsure

  To swear swears only not to be forsworn;

  Else what a mockery should it be to swear!

  But thou dost swear only to be forsworn;

  And most forsworn to keep what thou dost swear.

  Therefore thy later vows against thy first

  Is in thyself rebellion to thyself;

  And better conquest never canst thou make

  Than arm thy constant and thy nobler parts

  Against these giddy loose suggestions;

  Upon which better part our pray'rs come in,

  If thou vouchsafe them. But if not, then know

  The peril of our curses fight on thee

  So heavy as thou shalt not shake them off,

  But in despair die under the black weight.

  So you are making your promise an enemy of your promise,

  setting oaths against oaths like a civil war,

  setting your words against your words. Oh, let your promise

  which you first made to heaven, be carried out on heaven's behalf,

  that is, that you would be a champion of our church.

  Since what you have sworn is swearing against yourself

  and cannot be done by you,

  for if you break your oath you are not breaking it

  if you are doing so to keep your true oath,

  and not doing something when doing it would be evil

  then you are being most faithful by not doing it:

  the best thing to do when you're in the wrong

  is to do a wrong to right it; although doing wrong

  you will be doing right by doing wrong,

  and falsehood will cure falsehood, as fire cools fire

  in the scorched brains of someone who's just been burned.

  It is your religion which makes you want to keep your vows,

  but you have sworn against religion:

  you are swearing against the thing you have sworn,

  you are swearing against your own truth!

  Having sworn an oath you have the effrontery

  to say that your oath is the guarantee of your truthfulness!

  This makes a mockery of swearing, doesn't it?

  But you have sworn only that you won't break your oath,

  and your oath says that you must keep to what you have sworn.

  So your later promise goes against your first

  and so you are fighting against yourself;

  you can never win a greater victory

  than if you make sure your true and noble qualities

  resist the temptation of foolish suggestions:

  then the prayers of your better part will be answered,

  if you make them. But if you don't, then you should note

  that you will be so heavily cursed by us

  that you will not be able to escape them,

  and you will die in despair under their black weight.

  AUSTRIA.

  Rebellion, flat rebellion!

  Rebellion, plain rebellion!

  BASTARD.

  Will't not be?

  Will not a calf's-skin stop that mouth of thine?

  Is everything in vain?

  Wouldn't a calfskin block up your mouth?

  LEWIS.

  Father, to arms!

  Father, we must fight!

  BLANCH.

  Upon thy wedding-day?

  Against the blood that thou hast married?

  What, shall our feast be kept with slaughtered men?

  Shall braying trumpets and loud churlish drums,

  Clamours of hell, be measures to our pomp?

  O husband, hear me! ay, alack, how new

  Is 'husband' in my mouth! even for that name,

  Which till this time my tongue did ne'er pronounce,

  Upon my knee I beg, go not to arms

  Against mine uncle.
<
br />   On your wedding day?

  Against the family you have married into?

  What, shall we celebrate with men's deaths?

  Shall our wedding music be braying trumpets

  and loud spiteful drums, the racket of hell?

  Oh husband, listen to me! Alas, how new that word

  “husband” is to me! Just because of that name,

  which I have not ever said until now,

  I go down on my knees and beg you not to fight

  against my uncle.

  CONSTANCE.

  O, upon my knee,

  Made hard with kneeling, I do pray to thee,

  Thou virtuous Dauphin, alter not the doom

  Forethought by heaven!

  Oh, on my knees,

  which are worn out with begging, I pray you,

  you good Dauphin, do not go against

  the wishes of heaven!

  BLANCH.

  Now shall I see thy love. What motive may

  Be stronger with thee than the name of wife?

  Now I will see what your love is worth. What is

  more important to you than what your wife asks?

  CONSTANCE.

  That which upholdeth him that thee upholds,

  His honour. O, thine honour, Lewis, thine honour!

  The thing which supports the man who supports you,

  his honour. Oh, your honour, Louis, your honour!

  LEWIS.

  I muse your Majesty doth seem so cold,

  When such profound respects do pull you on.

  I'm surprised that your Majesty seems so cold,

  when such deep considerations should be working on you.

  PANDULPH.

  I will denounce a curse upon his head.

  I will announce a curse upon his head.

  KING PHILIP.

  Thou shalt not need. England, I will fall from thee.

  You won't have to. England, I forsake you.