The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)

by William Shakespeare

  Farewell, good Salisbury, and good luck go with thee!

  Farewell, Salisbury, and good luck!

  Exeter

  Farewell, kind lord; fight valiantly to-day! And yet I do thee wrong to mind thee of it, For thou art fram'd of the firm truth of valour.

  Goodbye, kind lord. Fight valiantly today, and although I don’t have to tell you, you are the epitome of courage.

  Exit Salisbury.

  Bedford

  He is as full of valour as of kindness, Princely in both.

  He is as courageous as he is kind.

  Enter the King.

  Westmoreland

  O that we now had here But one ten thousand of those men in England That do no work to-day!

  Oh, I wish we had one ten-thousandth of the men in England who have no work today!

  King

  What's he that wishes so? My cousin Westmoreland? No, my fair cousin. If we are mark'd to die, we are enow To do our country loss; and if to live, The fewer men, the greater share of honour. God's will! I pray thee, wish not one man more. By Jove, I am not covetous for gold, Nor care I who doth feed upon my cost; It yearns me not if men my garments wear; Such outward things dwell not in my desires; But if it be a sin to covet honour, I am the most offending soul alive. No, faith, my coz, wish not a man from England. God's peace! I would not lose so great an honour As one man more, methinks, would share from me For the best hope I have. O, do not wish one more! Rather proclaim it, Westmoreland, through my host, That he which hath no stomach to this fight, Let him depart. His passport shall be made, And crowns for convoy put into his purse. We would not die in that man's company That fears his fellowship to die with us. This day is call'd the feast of Crispian. He that outlives this day, and comes safe home, Will stand a tip-toe when this day is named, And rouse him at the name of Crispian. He that shall live this day, and see old age, Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours, And say, "To-morrow is Saint Crispian." Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars, And say, "These wounds I had on Crispian's day." Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot, But he'll remember with advantages What feats he did that day. Then shall our names, Familiar in his mouth as household words, Harry the King, Bedford, and Exeter, Warwick and Talbot, Salisbury and Gloucester, Be in their flowing cups freshly rememb'red. This story shall the good man teach his son; And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by, From this day to the ending of the world, But we in it shall be remembered, We few, we happy few, we band of brothers. For he to-day that sheds his blood with me Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile, This day shall gentle his condition; And gentlemen in England now a-bed Shall think themselves accurs'd they were not here, And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day.

  What is the kind of person who makes such a wish? My cousin, Westmoreland? No, my cousin, if we are to die, we are enough and our country doesn’t lose anymore men. If we live, then we share more honor. God’s will is what I pray. By God, I do not want any gold. I don’t care who feeds off my demise. It doesn’t bother me, if people borrow my clothes. I am not a material man. But, if it’s a sin to want honor, then I am the most sinful soul alive. No, I swear, my cuz, I don’t wish for any more men from England. God’s peace! I don’t want to lose honor in the eyes of my men, so if anyone doesn’t wish to fight, let him leave. Tell them, Westmoreland, a passport will be made and money will be provided for the voyage home. Today is the Feast of Saint Crispian, and anyone who lives to see this day will stand tall in the future. He who lives today, and sees old age will tell everyone about the scars he received on Saint Crispian’s Day. He’ll never forget what feats he accomplished this day. Our names will be engraved in his memory, Harry the King, Bedford and Exeter, Warwick and Talbot, Salisbury and Gloucester. Today will make a story he will tell his son. From now on, the Feast of Saint Crispian will never pass that we won’t be remembered. We few, we happy few, we band of brothers. Any who sheds his blood with me will be my brother, no matter how awful. This day will make him anew. Gentlemen, men in their beds in England will wish they were here and consider themselves lesser men compared to any who fought with us today.

  Re-enter Salisbury.

  Salisbury

  My sovereign lord, bestow yourself with speed. The French are bravely in their battles set, And will with all expedience charge on us.

  My sovereign lord, come quickly. The French are setting up for battle and will soon charge upon us.

  King

  All things are ready, if our minds be so.

  Is everything ready?

  Westmoreland

  Perish the man whose mind is backward now!

  Anyone who isn’t may die today!

  King

  Thou dost not wish more help from England, coz?

  You don’t wish for more help from England, cuz?

  Westmoreland

  God's will! my liege, would you and I alone, Without more help, could fight this royal battle!

  I only want God’s will, my liege! If it were just you and me, we could fight this battle alone!

  King

  Why, now thou hast unwish'd five thousand men, Which likes me better than to wish us one. You know your places. God be with you all!

  Why have you unwished five thousand men for one? You all know your places. God be with you all!

  Trumpet sounds. Enter Montjoy.

  Montjoy

  Once more I come to know of thee, King Harry, If for thy ransom thou wilt now compound, Before thy most assured overthrow; For certainly thou art so near the gulf, Thou needs must be englutted. Besides, in mercy, The Constable desires thee thou wilt mind Thy followers of repentance; that their souls May make a peaceful and a sweet retire From off these fields, where, wretches, their poor bodies Must lie and fester.

  I’m here once more to know what you desire, King Harry. Do you want to negotiate your ransom before you are defeated? You and your men must be in need. Besides, the constable wants to show mercy, and give you an opportunity to retreat from what will soon be your death bed.

  King

  Who hath sent thee now?

  Who sent you this time?

  Montjoy

  The Constable of France.

  The Constable of France.

  King

  I pray thee, bear my former answer back: Bid them achieve me and then sell my bones. Good God! why should they mock poor fellows thus? The man that once did sell the lion's skin While the beast liv'd, was kill'd with hunting him. A many of our bodies shall no doubt Find native graves, upon the which, I trust, Shall witness live in brass of this day's work; And those that leave their valiant bones in France, Dying like men, though buried in your dunghills, They shall be fam'd; for there the sun shall greet them, And draw their honours reeking up to heaven; Leaving their earthly parts to choke your clime, The smell whereof shall breed a plague in France. Mark then abounding valour in our English, That being dead, like to the bullet's grazing, Break out into a second course of mischief, Killing in relapse of mortality. Let me speak proudly: tell the Constable We are but warriors for the working-day. Our gayness and our gilt are all besmirch'd With rainy marching in the painful field; There's not a piece of feather in our host-- Good argument, I hope, we will not fly-- And time hath worn us into slovenry; But, by the mass, our hearts are in the trim; And my poor soldiers tell me, yet ere night They'll be in fresher robes, or they will pluck The gay new coats o'er the French soldiers' heads And turn them out of service. If they do this-- As, if God please, they shall,--my ransom then Will soon be levied. Herald, save thou thy labour. Come thou no more for ransom, gentle herald. They shall have none, I swear, but these my joints; Which if they have as I will leave 'em them, Shall yield them little, tell the Constable.

  Please take my answer back. Tell them to come and get me. Then they can sell my bones. Good God, why do they mock us this way? The man, who tried to sell the lion’s skin before he was dead, was killed while hunting him. Many of us will die today, but
they will be honored in heaven, while their dead bodies choke up the air and breed a deadly plague in France. Remember our valor and or ability to cause trouble even with our death. Let me be clear. Tell the constable we are only warriors for today. We don’t want peace and we won’t surrender. Our bodies may be worn, but our hearts our healthy. My poor soldiers tell me, they will be in fresh clothes tonight, or they will take the new coats over the French soldiers’ heads. If they succeed, God willing, my ransom will be known. Montjoy, save yourself some work. Don’t come anymore for my ransom. They can have my bones and nothing else. Tell the constable

  Montjoy

  I shall, King Harry. And so fare thee well; Thou never shalt hear herald any more.

  I will, King Harry. Goodbye. You will never hear from me again.

  Exit.

  King

  I fear thou'lt once more come again for ransom.

  I fear he will come once more.

  Enter York.

  York

  My lord, most humbly on my knee I beg The leading of the vaward.

  My lord, I beg you, on bended knee, to let me lead the vanguard.

  King

  Take it, brave York. Now, soldiers, march away; And how thou pleasest, God, dispose the day!

  Take it, brave York. Now, soldiers, march. God’s will be done.

  Exit.

  Alarm. Excursions. Enter Pistol, French Soldier, and Boy.

  Pistol

  Yield, cur!

  Stop, dog!

  French Soldier

  Je pense que vous etes le gentilhomme de bonne qualite.

  You are a gentleman with high ranks.

  Pistol

  Qualitie calmie custure me! Art thou a gentleman? What is thy name? Discuss.

  Are you a gentleman? What is your name? Tell me.

  French Soldier

  O Seigneur Dieu!

  Oh, Seigneur Dieu!

  Pistol

  O, Signieur Dew should be a gentleman. Perpend my words, O Signieur Dew, and mark: O Signieur Dew, thou diest on point of fox, Except, O signieur, thou do give to me Egregious ransom.

  Oh, Signieur Dew, be a gentleman and pardon my words. You will be killed with my sword, unless you pay me for your ransom.

  French Soldier

  O, prenez misericorde! ayez pitie de moi!

  O, prenez miericord! Ayez pitie de moi! Have mercy! Have pity on me!

  Pistol

  Moy shall not serve; I will have forty moys, Or I will fetch thy rim out at thy throat In drops of crimson blood.

  Moy is not enough. You must pay me forty moys, or I will cut your throat.

  French Soldier

  Est-il impossible d'echapper la force de ton bras?

  Est-il impossible d’echapper la force de ton bras? It is impossible. May I escape your arms?

  Pistol

  Brass, cur! Thou damned and luxurious mountain goat, Offer'st me brass?

  Brass, you dog! You’re just a mountain goat offering me brass.

  French Soldier

  O pardonnez moi!

  O pardonnez moi! Pardon me!

  Pistol

  Say'st thou me so? Is that a ton of moys? Come hither, boy; ask me this slave in French What is his name.

  Is that a ton of moys? Come here, boy. Ask this slave in French for his name.

  Boy

  Ecoutez: comment etes-vous appele?

  Ecoutez: comment etes-vous appele? Look, what’s your name?

  French Soldier

  Monsieur le Fer.

  Monsieur le Fer.

  Boy

  He says his name is Master Fer.

  He says his name is Master Fer.

  Pistol

  Master Fer! I'll fer him, and firk him, and ferret him. Discuss the same in French unto him.

  Master Fer! I’m about to fer him, and firk him. Tell him in French.

  Boy

  I do not know the French for fer, and ferret, and firk.

  I don’t know how.

  Pistol

  Bid him prepare; for I will cut his throat.

  Tell him to prepare for death. I’m going to cut his throat.

  French Soldier

  Que dit-il, monsieur?

  Que dit-il, monsieur? What is he saying, sir?

  Boy

  Il me commande a vous dire que vous faites vous pret; car ce soldat ici est dispose tout a cette heure de couper votre gorge.

  He told me to tell you to prepare to die. He is about to cut your throat.

  Pistol

  Owy, cuppele gorge, permafoy, Peasant, unless thou give me crowns, brave crowns; Or mangled shalt thou be by this my sword.

  Yes, cut your throat, by God, unless you give me crowns and lots of them. Or you will be mangled by my sword.

  French Soldier

  O, je vous supplie, pour l'amour de Dieu, me pardonner! Je suis gentilhomme de bonne maison; gardez ma vie, et je vous donnerai deux cents ecus.

  Oh, I’m begging you, for the love of God, spare me! I am a gentleman from a good family. Spare me and I will give you two hundred ecus.

  Pistol

  What are his words?

  What did he say?

  Boy

  He prays you to save his life. He is a gentleman of a good house; and for his ransom he will give you two hundred crowns.

  He begs you to spare his life. He is a gentleman of a good family and he is willing to give you two hundred crowns for his life.

  Pistol

  Tell him my fury shall abate, and I The crowns will take.

  Tell him I’ll take the money.

  French Soldier

  Petit monsieur, que dit-il?

  Young man, what does he say?

  Boy

  Encore qu'il est contre son jurement de pardonner aucun prisonnier; neanmoins, pour les ecus que vous l'avez promis, il est content de vous donner la liberte, le franchisement.

  He says it would be breaking an oath to pardon any prisoner. However, for the money, he is willing to free you.

  French Soldier

  Sur mes genoux je vous donne mille remercimens; et je m'estime heureux que je suis tombe entre les mains d'un chevalier, je pense, le plus brave, vaillant, et tres distingue seigneur d'Angleterre.

  Thank you, thank you! I am lucky to have fallen into the hands of a knight, the most noble gentleman of England.

  Pistol

  Expound unto me, boy.

  Tell me what he said.

  Boy

  He gives you upon his knees, a thousand thanks; and he esteems himself happy that he hath fallen into the hands of one, as he thinks, the most brave, valorous, and thrice-worthy signieur of England.

  He thanks you and considers you the bravest Englishman.

  Pistol

  As I suck blood, I will some mercy show. Follow me!

  As I bleed him dry, I will show some mercy, today. Follow me!

  Boy

  Suivez-vous le grand capitaine.

  Follow the captain.

  Exit Pistol and French Soldier.

  I did never know so full a voice issue from so empty a heart; but the saying is true, "The empty vessel makes the greatest sound." Bardolph and Nym had ten times more valour than this roaring devil i' the old play, that every one may pare his nails with a wooden dagger; and they are both hang'd; and so would this be, if he durst steal anything adventurously. I must stay with the lackeys with the luggage of our camp. The French might have a good prey of us, if he knew of it; for there is none to guard it but boys.

  I never heard a voice with so much sense from such an empty heart. The saying, “The empty vessel makes the greatest sound,” must be true. Bardolph and Num had ten times more valor than this raging devil. They are both hanged and so will he, if he steals anything. I must stay with the servants and the camp’s luggage. The French could make good prey of us if they knew.

  Exit.

  Enter Constable, Orleans, Bourbon, Dauphin, and Rambures.

  Constable

  O diable!
<
br />   Oh, hell!

  Orleans

  O Seigneur! le jour est perdu, tout est perdu!

  Oh Lord, the day is lost! All is lost!

  Dauphin

  Mort de ma vie! all is confounded, all! Reproach and everlasting shame Sits mocking in our plumes.

  Everything is messed up! Shame upon all our heads. Oh good luck, don’t run away.

  A short alarm.

  Constable

  Why, all our ranks are broke.

  All our men are broken up.

  Dauphin

  O perdurable shame! let's stab ourselves, Be these the wretches that we play'd at dice for?