The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)
Page 481
not an important judge.
for the table than a necessary bencher in the Capitol.
MENENIUS.
Even a priest would make fun of you if they knew how
Our very priests must become mockers if they shall encounter such
ridiculous you two are. Your speech isn’t worth the effort of
ridiculous subjects as you are. When you speak best unto the
wagging your beards while talking,
purpose, it is not worth the wagging of your beards; and your
and your beards aren’t good enough to fill
beards deserve not so honourable a grave as to stuff a botcher's
pillows or cushion an ass’s ass. Yet you have the gall to say
cushion or to be entombed in an ass's pack-saddle. Yet you must
Marcius is proud, even though, at a conservative estimate, he is worth
be saying, Marcius is proud; who, in a cheap estimation, is worth
more than all your predecessors since Noah (though the
all your predecessors since Deucalion; though peradventure some
best of your predecessors were just executioners). Good evening
of the best of 'em were hereditary hangmen. Good-e’en to your
gentlemen. If I listened to any more of your conversation I would lose my mind
worships: more of your conversation would infect my brain, being
and make me a demagogue like you. I will leave you
the herdsmen of the beastly plebeians: I will be bold to take my
now.
leave of you.
[BRUTUS and SICINIUS retire.]
[Enter VOLUMNIA, VIRGILIA, VALERIA, &c.]
How are you, ladies? You’re more noble than the moon.
How now, my as fair as noble ladies,--and the moon, were she
Where are you trying to go in such a hurry?
earthly, no nobler,--whither do you follow your eyes so fast?
VOLUMNIA.
Menenius, my boy Marcius is coming. For the love of God,
Honourable Menenius, my boy Marcius approaches; for the love of
let’s go.
Juno, let's go.
MENENIUS.
Oh boy! Marcius is coming home!
Ha! Marcius coming home!
VOLUMNIA.
Yes, Menenius, and with all the signs of great success.
Ay, worthy Menenius, and with most prosperous approbation.
MENENIUS.
You must be kidding. Hoo! Marcius coming
Take my cap, Jupiter, and I thank thee.--Hoo! Marcius coming
home!
home!
VOLUMNIA, VIRGILIA.
No, it’s true.
Nay, 'tis true.
VOLUMNIA.
Look, here’s a letter from him, the government has another,
Look, here's a letter from him: the state hath another,
and his wife has another. And I think there’s one at home for you.
his wife another; and I think there's one at home for you.
MENENIUS.
I’m going to get so drunk tonight that my house is going to feel tipsy. A letter for me?
I will make my very house reel to-night.--A letter for me?
VIRGILIA.
Yes, certainly there’s a letter for you; I saw it.
Yes, certain, there's a letter for you; I saw it.
MENENIUS.
A letter for me! That makes me so glad that I’ll be healthy
A letter for me! It gives me an estate of seven years'
for seven years, during which time I will make faces at the doctor:
health; in which time I will make a lip at the physician: the
best medicine in the medical textbook is a no better
most sovereign prescription in Galen is but empiricutic, and, to
than horse-medicine compared to this news. Is he
this preservative, of no better report than a horse-drench. Is he
wounded? He tends to come home wounded.
not wounded? he was wont to come home wounded.
VIRGILIA.
Oh, no, no, no.
O, no, no, no.
VOLUMNIA.
Oh, he is wounded, and I thank God for that.
O, he is wounded, I thank the gods for't.
MENENIUS.
So do I, as long as he’s not wounded too much. Did he
So do I too, if it be not too much.--Brings a victory in
win? The wounds will look on him.
his pocket?--The wounds become him.
VOLUMNIA.
Yes, and Menenius, for the third time he’s been given a medal for
On's brows: Menenius, he comes the third time home with the oaken
saving Roman lives in action.
garland.
MENENIUS.
Did he beat Aufidius soundly?
Has he disciplined Aufidius soundly?
VOLUMNIA.
Titus Lartisu wrote to say that fought each other, but Aufidius
Titus Lartius writes,--they fought together, but Aufidius
escaped alive.
got off.
MENENIUS.
It was time for him to go, I’ll give him that. If he had
And 'twas time for him too, I'll warrant him that: an he
stayed and fought, I wouldn’t have traded places with him for all the
had stayed by him, I would not have been so fidiused for all the
treasire in Corioles. Has the Senate been
chests in Corioli and the gold that's in them. Is the Senate
informed about all this?
possessed of this?
VOLUMNIA.
Let’s go, ladies. Yes, yes, yes: the Senate has letters
Good ladies, let's go.--Yes, yes, yes; the Senate has letters
from the General, in which he gives all the credit for the victory
from the general, wherein he gives my son the whole name of the
to Marcius: he’s outdone himself this time.
war: he hath in this action outdone his former deeds doubly.
VALERIA.
Honestly, they’re saying the most wonderful things about him.
In troth, there's wondrous things spoke of him.
MENENIUS.
Wonderful! Yes, I bet they are, and I’m sure he deserves their praise.
Wondrous! ay, I warrant you, and not without his true purchasing.
VIRGILIA.
God made them true!
The gods grant them true!
VOLUMNIA.
True! Yeah, right.
True! pow, wow.
MENENIUS.
True! I swear they’re true. Where is he wounded? [To the
True! I'll be sworn they are true. Where is he wounded?--[To the
TRIBUNES, who come forward.] Hello, gentlemen! Marcius
TRIBUNES, who come forward.] God save your good worships! Marcius
is coming home, and he has good reason to be proud.—Where is he
is coming home; he has more cause to be proud.--Where is he
wounded?
wounded?
VOLUMNIA.
In the shoulder and in the left arm. He will have large
I' the shoulder and i' the left arm; there will be large
scars to show people when he is campaigning to be consul [head of the Roman Republic].
cicatrices to show the people when he shall stand for his place.
He received seven wounds in the last war.
He received in the repulse of Tarquin seven hurts i' the body.
MENENIUS.
Plus one in the neck, and two in the thigh—there’s nine wounds that I
One i' the neck and two i' the thigh,--there's nine that I
know of.
know.
VOLUMNIA.
Before this last expedition, he had a total of 25 wounds on his body.
He had, before
this last expedition, twenty-five wounds upon him.
MENENIUS.
Now it’s 27. And every wound on him meant the death of an enemy.
Now it's twenty-seven: every gash was an enemy's grave.
[A shout and the sound of trumpets.]
[A shout and flourish.]
Listen! The trumpets are sounding.
Hark! the trumpets.
VOLUMNIA.
Those mean that Marcius is coming. He makes noise
These are the ushers of Marcius: before him
before he shows up, and leaves a wake of tears behind him.
He carries noise, and behind him he leaves tears;
In his strong arms he carries Death;
Death, that dark spirit, in's nervy arm doth lie;
when he raises and lowers his arms, men die.
Which, being advanc'd, declines, and then men die.
[A sennet. Trumpets sound. Enter COMINIUS and TITUS LARTIUS;
between them, CORIOLANUS, crowned with an oaken garland; with
CAPTAINS and Soldiers and a HERALD.]
HERALD.
Know, Romans, that Marcius fought all alone
Know, Rome, that all alone Marcius did fight
behind enemy line, and he won
Within Corioli gates: where he hath won,
a new name to add to Caius Marcius:
With fame, a name to Caius Marcius; these
Coriolanus!
In honour follows Coriolanus:--
Welcome to Rome, famous Coriolanus!
Welcome to Rome, renowned Coriolanus!
[Flourish.]
ALL.
Welcome to Rome, famous Coriolanus!
Welcome to Rome, renowned Coriolanus!
CORIOLANUS.
Stop that, it offends me to be praised so much.
No more of this, it does offend my heart;
Please, no more.
Pray now, no more.
COMINIUS.
Look, sire, your mother!
Look, sir, your mother!
CORIOLANUS.
Oh,
O,
I know you prayed to all the gods
You have, I know, petition'd all the gods
for me to do well!
For my prosperity!
[Kneels.]
VOLUMNIA.
No, good soldier, stand up.
Nay, my good soldier, up;
My gentle Marcius, good Caius and
My gentle Marcius, worthy Caius, and
(because of your great achievements) now called—
By deed-achieving honour newly nam'd,--
What is it?—Do I have to call you Coriolanus?
What is it?--Coriolanus must I call thee?
But, look, your wife!
But, O, thy wife!
CORIOLANUS.
Hello my dear silent lady!
My gracious silence, hail!
Would you have laughed if I had come home dead?
Wouldst thou have laugh'd had I come coffin'd home,
Then why do you cry to see me triumphant? Oh, my dear,
That weep'st to see me triumph? Ah, my dear,
you look as sad as the widows of Corioles,
Such eyes the widows in Corioli wear,
and the mothers who’ve lost sons.
And mothers that lack sons.
MENENIUS.
Now you will be made you consul!
Now the gods crown thee!
CORIOLANUS.
You’re still alive? [To VALERIA] Oh, I beg your pardon, my lady.
And live you yet? [To VALERIA]--O my sweet lady, pardon.
VOLUMNIA.
I’m all in a tizzy. Welcome home, Martius; and welcome,
I know not where to turn.--O, welcome home;--and welcome,
General; welcome, everyone.
general;--and you are welcome all.
MENENIUS.
A hundred thousand welcome. I don’t know whether
A hundred thousand welcomes.--I could weep
to laugh or cry; I am happy and sad at once. Welcome!
And I could laugh; I am light and heavy.--Welcome:
Damn everybody
A curse begin at very root on's heart
who isn’t glad to see you1 You are three of the best
That is not glad to see thee!--You are three
people in Rome, but, I’m afraid to say,
That Rome should dote on: yet, by the faith of men,
we have some people here at home that cannot be
We have some old crab trees here at home that will not
improved. But welcome home anyway, soldiers.
Be grafted to your relish. Yet welcome, warriors.
Let’s just dismiss those bad people as bad
We call a nettle but a nettle; and
foolish.
The faults of fools but folly.
COMINIUS.
Right, as always, Menenius!
Ever right.
CORIOLANUS.
Menenius is the best.
Menenius ever, ever.
HERALD.
Keep moving people!
Give way there, and go on!
CORIOLANUS.
[To his wife and mother.] Give me your hands and come with me.
[To his wife and mother.] Your hand, and yours:
Before I can rest in our house
Ere in our own house I do shade my head,
I have to visit the Senate,
The good patricians must be visited;
which not only greeted me
From whom I have receiv'd not only greetings,
but gave me all kinds of honors.
But with them change of honours.
VOLUMNIA.
I have lived
I have lived
to see all my dreams come true,
To see inherited my very wishes,
there’s only one thing missing
And the buildings of my fancy; only
[seeing Coriolanus made consul], and I’m sure
There's one thing wanting, which I doubt not but
Rome will give it to you.
Our Rome will cast upon thee.
CORIOLANUS.
But remember, mother,
Know, good mother,
I would rather serve the people as I see fit,
I had rather be their servant in my way
rather than do what the people want.
Than sway with them in theirs.
COMINIUS.
Let’s go to the Capitol.
On, to the Capitol.
[Flourish. Cornets. Exeunt in state, as before. The tribunes
remain.]
BRUTUS.
Everyone is talking about him, and short-sighted people
All tongues speak of him and the bleared sights
put on their glasses to see him. Nursemaids let the babies
Are spectacled to see him: your prattling nurse
they’re supposed to be watching cry while they
Into a rapture lets her baby cry
chat with him; the kitchen slut wears
While she chats him: the kitchen malkin pins
her best rags on her filthy body,
Her richest lockram 'bout her reechy neck,
and climbs the walls to catch a glimpse of him; all kinds of
Clamb'ring the walls to eye him: stalls, bulks, windows,
shops close up, and people of all types climb
Are smother'd up, leads fill'd and ridges hors'd
on the rooftops, all trying
With variable complexions; all agreeing
to see him pass. Rarely-seen priests
In earnestness to see him: seld-shown flamens
come out and mingle with the crowds, and struggle
Do press among the popular throngs, and puff
to gain a place among the people. Fancy ladies
To win a vulgar station: our veil'd dames
blush pink when they see him,
Commit the war of white and damask, in
in their expensive makeup, which makes them
Their nicely gawded cheeks, to the wanton spoil
look sunburned. They male such a fuss over him,
Of Phoebus' burning kisses; such a pother,
as if God himself
As if that whatsoever god who leads him
had entered his body
Were slily crept into his human powers,
and made him as good-looking as he is.
And gave him graceful posture.
SICINIUS.
I bet he’ll shortly
On the sudden
be made consul.
I warrant him consul.
BRUTUS.
In that case we
Then our office may
will lose all of our power during his time in office.
During his power go sleep.
SICINIUS.
Fortunately, he can’t bring his honors
He cannot temp'rately transport his honours
with him into the future. By the time of the election for consul
From where he should begin and end; but will
he will have lost this good-will.
Lose those he hath won.
BRUTUS.
We can take comfort in that, at least.
In that there's comfort.
SICINIUS.
Don’t doubt that the common people, who we represent,
Doubt not the commoners, for whom we stand,
will gladly forget these new honors,
But they, upon their ancient malice will forget,
on account of the old hatred they have for Coriolanus.
With the least cause these his new honours; which
I don’t doubt that be will give them a new reason to hate him,
That he will give them make as little question
any more than that he will be proud to have earned their hatred.
As he is proud to do't.
BRUTUS.
I heard him swear,
I heard him swear,
that if he were to run for the consulship, he would never