Getaway Girlz

by Joan Rylen

  About this time Lucy popped out from around the corner and walked up with a look of ‘oh crap’ on her face. She recovered, flashed a wide smile and said confidently, “You girls causing trouble already? Y’all are just a menace to society!”

  Mr. Policia got one look at her green eyes, auburn hair and curvy figure and said, “Special today for Texas girls. Reserved parking.”

  He moved a barricade that previously blocked their entry into a lot owned by another hotel. They pulled in, blew kisses, spilling out their thanks (and their cleavage).

  “Did we luck out or what?” Vivian said. “Hopefully this kind of service will be available the whole trip.”

  They piled out of the car, popped the trunk and grabbed their stuff while Lucy introduced herself to their new favorite policeman.

  "Well, aren’t you too cute for boots,” Lucy laughed and traced her finger around his badge. “Thanks for the great spot. We’ll be seeing you later, Mr. Policia Arturo.”

  They waved as they walked away, Arturo never taking his eyes off Lucy.

  “I think he’s in love,” Vivian snorted and gave Lucy a bump with her hip. Then she let go of her luggage long enough to make a heart with her index fingers and thumbs.

  “I’d say so!” Kate chimed in.

  “Love, lust, whatever. It’s always good to make friends with local law enforcement,” Wendy said. “Especially in a foreign country.”

  “Right!” Vivian turned her finger-heart into two guns. “Pow, pow! Never know when that will come in handy.”

  “Got us a free parking spot. Rock and roll,” Lucy said, pushing Vivian’s guns away. “Holster those bad boys and move your ass.”

  Next stop, front desk. They lugged their bags through the sand, but Vivian had no complaints. I’m on vacation, and it’s my birthday!

  The hotel lobby sported a beach theme with an abundance of tropical plants. Vivian almost expected to see monkeys swinging around or brightly-colored birds perched above. The floor was squeaky clean, like somebody with a mop followed behind everyone who walked in off the beach. Neat-freak Lucy looked pleased. Overall, the lobby made a first-rate initial impression.

  Check-in was a breeze. The gracious staffer (who spoke great English) told the girls where they could find the business center, restaurant, etc. She pointed to the stairs, which would take them to their room on the second floor.

  “Who the heck needs a business center,” Kate mumbled as they walked away.

  “Losers,” Lucy answered.

  At their room, Vivian inserted the key card in the door and it hummed open. Beautiful turquoise water gleamed from beyond the balcony. Nice touch, very dramatic.

  The room was simple and clean, with more beach theme.

  “This is heaven!” Kate threw herself on the bed and kicked her feet in the air.

  “It’s pretty freakin’ perfect,” Wendy said as she walked toward the view. “Not too fancy. Just right.”

  Lucy gave the room the evil eye, thoroughly working it over. She couldn’t find much wrong. “No TV, but who cares.” Unable to help herself after her room inspection, she made a beeline for the temperature gauge and set it to 65.

  Freak, Vivian thought and had to smirk. In her old life with Rick, he would have been having a conniption fit about now, unable to live without ESPN. The girls, of course, could care less. Vivian had a feeling they wouldn’t be spending much time in the room anyway. The spacious, ocean-facing balcony was by far the rockin’-est place to be, and she planned to spend a few solitary minutes out there each morning.

  After taking in the room and view, they unpacked the essentials and decided to do the obvious, hit the beach. Time for standard Playa attire: bikinis. Well, except for Vivian. Her body was still in bounce-back mode from the twins, who were born full term, 7 pounds 12 ounces and 6 pounds 5 ounces. Monster babies, she called them.

  Towards the end of her pregnancy she looked like a freak of nature (her doctor actually told her this). Vivian’s pelvic bones felt like they were going to crumble into little shards and fall into her legs, and she looked like she had a submarine around her middle.

  Since their birth the “twin skin” had yet to elasticize back into place completely, and she wasn’t sure it ever would. She opted for a tankini. Her arms and legs were normal size, thank goodness. With her tummy tucked behind a tropical swirl of color, Lucy in a black and gold bikini, Wendy in a metallic red bikini, and Kate in a hot pink string bikini they were ready to hit the sand. They grabbed hats, towels, sunscreen, sunglasses and the ever-important koozies and headed out the door.

  Kate stopped Vivian as the door closed behind them. “Wait. Viv, don’t you want to take off your watch?”

  “Yeah, like we care what time it is,” Lucy said. “We’re on vacation!”

  “I wear it all the time, I don’t even think about it. It’s waterproof so no worries.”

  “Then let’s boogie.” Wendy danced over to the stairs. “I’m ready to hit the beach!”

  They woo-hoo’ed and danced down the stairs and through the lobby to the gorgeous Playa del Carmen beach.

  A young Hispanic man, wearing a royal blue shirt, khaki shorts and mirrored wraparound sunglasses, approached them as they reached the sand. His name tag read: Manuel.

  “Hola Señoritas. Bueñas tardes. Something to drink? Eat?”

  His wavy brown hair fell into his eyes and he brushed it back with his fingertips. He smiled at them. “Beach chairs, umbrella, food, anything. I here for you.”

  Vivian realized through his broken English that he had said food and clasped her hands in a begging motion.

  “Food! I need food.” She had been running late for the airport this morning and skipped breakfast. Then, thanks to her nerves, she had drunk her lunch on the plane.

  “Four chairs and an umbrella would be great too,” Wendy added.

  Manuel nodded. “No problema, señoritas,” he said, and headed off toward a cabana. He was good to look at from the back, and they all took a moment to admire the view.

  “Mmm, mmm. That man is a beautiful brown stud.” Lucy fanned herself with her big-brimmed sun hat, looking at Manuel, her sunglasses pushed down on her nose.

  Vivian put her hand to her heart and gave Lucy her “I’m shocked” look.

  “What?” Lucy pushed her sunglasses back up. “I’m married, not blind.”

  “I realize this,” Vivian said. “I’m just not sure I’ve ever heard you say anything like that.”

  “I have!” Kate said. “Remember that time at the daiquiri bar in Houston? The one with the muscled-up bartender. What was his name? Larry?”

  “Oh, that’s right. I do remember him. Lucy thought he was hot-to-trot,” Vivian teased. “He had long, silky hair. She kept ordering drink after drink just to get him to come near her.”

  Lucy did a throat clear. “First of all, his name was Lars, not Larry. Secondly, he was extremely talented behind the bar. He could have been cast in Cocktail alongside Tom Cruise.”

  “Everything came out of frozen daiquiri machines,” Vivian said. “That doesn’t take any talent.”

  “Yeah, but that man could work those handles. He had some truly gifted hands, and he would shake his ass to the music as deliciousness filled the plastic cups.” She looked off into space with a satisfied smile on her face.

  “You’re a naughty girl,” Wendy said.

  Lucy raised an eyebrow and her smile turned devious.

  “More importantly,” Vivian recalled, “do you remember getting sick as a dog on the way home after all those ass-shakin’ daiquiris?”

  “I knew you were going to bring that up,” Lucy said. “I had gotten my flu shot earlier that day!”

  “Flu shot my ass!” Vivian laughed.

  “Oh Lucy, that was horrible.” Kate patted Lucy’s arm in confirmation.

  “Yes, it was,” Vivian said. “Blue spew all over the passenger window and door. It was disgusting.”

  “Okay, enough,” Wendy said. “Let’s not
talk about anyone getting sick. Bad vibes.”

  “Ma’am, yes ma’am,” Vivian gave Wendy a salute. “No barf banter. Gotcha.”

  They laughed as they eyed the water, and picked a spot a little ways down the beach. Manuel had four beach chairs, an umbrella and most importantly, a menu. He carried everything with ease. He slipped Vivian the menu and put out the beach chairs according to Lucy’s instructions.

  Vivian settled into hers and stretched her legs, enjoying the feel of the sun on her skin. Kate plopped down on Vivian’s left and Wendy on the right. Lucy wiped off her chair, giving it a thorough de-sanding before she took a seat next to Kate.

  How does she live like this, being a germ-a-phobe? I’d go nuts, Vivian thought.

  Manuel used a tube thing to dig the umbrella hole, then got the umbrella adjusted to Lucy's specifications. She had pasty white skin and wanted to keep it that way. When finished, Lucy smoothly passed him a $20 bill.

  Vivian looked at her and raised an eyebrow. “Quite the tip there, huh Lucy?”

  Lucy pretended not to hear Vivian and flipped open a magazine.

  Unexpectedly, a young lady bearing tequila shots materialized, Tiempo Loco, she called it, and passed one out to each of them, compliments of the hotel.

  God bless Mexico! Vivian thought, though she was not a huge tequila fan. She passed the menu to Kate and grabbed for her shot.

  Wendy raised her shot glass high. “To Viv! May this birthday be a new beginning.”

  “To Viv, aye ya yai ya yai,” they all chanted.

  I love my friends, Vivian thought.

  Vivian licked, slammed, and sucked the tequila back. She smiled over at the girls and just couldn’t resist…

  “At least the tequila’s not blue. Right Lucy?”

  CHAPTER 5

  KATE ORDERED chips and salsa, quesadillas and ceviche from Manuel, who quickly proved to be a do-it-all kind of guy. Vivian ordered her favorite beer, Dos Equis lager, and the other girls put in drink orders too. Lucy wanted another tequila with a beer back which made Vivian shudder. Kate ordered a fruity frozen concoction complete with paper umbrella, and Wendy a margarita.

  The girls caught up more, remembering old times. They laughed about the Greek Goddess costumes they made for Halloween in Austin on 6th Street when they were 20. They didn’t have much money, so they bought a lot of cheap white fabric, cut it to size and wrapped it around themselves like togas. They bought greenery for their heads at the dollar store and did themselves up in body glitter.

  “For less than $5 each, we looked pretty damn good,” Vivian declared.

  They won second place in a costume contest at a bar. They lost to an Elvis impersonator who made them wonder if the King was still alive and walking around Austin.

  Manuel arrived with the drinks and must have heard them talking about Elvis because he launched into his own impersonation. He turned his back to the girls, moved his hips a little and turned his head to the side. Then he looked down at the sand and slowly, dramatically, brought his head up and held a pretend microphone in his right hand.

  He sang “Love me Tender” in its entirety. On the last verse he knelt next to Kate and finished with a dramatic kiss of her hand. He then stood as they cheered his portrayal.

  “Bravo! Bravo!” Vivian said as she clapped. “Encore!”

  “Thank you, thank you very much,” he said with an Elvis smirk.

  He looked back, raised one side of his lip and pointed to the girls as his accolades rolled on.

  “Never thought I’d see that in Mexico!” Wendy said.

  Others beachgoer’s heard Manuel, so he got little applauses here and there. One lady gave him a tip. “Maybe he should do that more often,” Kate laughed.

  The girls settled back in their chairs and talked about who was doing what with whom from high school. Who married their sweethearts. Who had divorced them.

  “Speaking of high school, whatever happened to your old car, the La Bamba, Lucy?” Kate asked. “When we got into our rental today, it brought back many-a-memory.”

  “That car still lives, believe it or not. I bequeathed it to my brother who eventually gave it to our cousin.”

  The La Bamba was a 1980 Pontiac Grand LeMans. It was a dull brown, with a hint of rust, so the dirt blended in. The power steering was out, which gave Lucy ripped upper arms from turning the wheel. In the back seat the headliner hung down so far that it blocked Vivian’s and everyone else’s vision. Eventually it got pulled off, leaving behind a nasty, gummy residue, and the ceiling became a place for napkins, gum wrappers, even hall passes. “La Bamba” was sung a lot in that car. “Low Rider” also fit and was a crowd favorite.

  The sun smiled down on Vivian, Wendy and Kate, while Lucy hogged the umbrella shade. Lucy didn’t want to go up even one notch on the pale scale. She liked to stay between one and three and was convinced the rest of them would die of skin cancer. Vivian and Wendy were a six and hoped to leave Playa an eight, minimum. Kate was around a five and wouldn’t mind being a seven.

  From Vivian’s perspective, a zero on the pale scale was a glow in the dark, never seen the sun, bright light reflected off your body could sear retinas, paleness. A ten was a sun-drenched Hawaiian Tropic tan. Dermatologists frowned on sunworshipers like Vivian, but at least she didn’t do fake-n-bake. She needed real sunshine, not a coffin-like contraption that could, for real, fry her eyeballs.

  Manuel stopped by to check on them. “Food en uno momento. Mas drinks?”

  “Absolutely,” Lucy said. “Another shot for me.”

  “How about a bucket of Dos Equis?” Vivian looked back and forth between Wendy and Kate. “Sound good?”

  “Yep,” they both said without moving.

  Manuel returned soon and Vivian took a picture of their bucket of beer. Six cervezas perfectly placed and crowned with lime. She reached for one and disrupted the symmetry. Wendy and Kate grabbed one, too, and the beautiful bucket suddenly looked empty again.

  Lucy licked, slammed and sucked her shot quickly. “Mmmm, zat wah good,” she mumbled, the lime peel smiling out from between her teeth.

  She discarded her lime and hopped off her beach chair. “I’ve got to wash my hands before I eat. I’ll be back in uno momento.”

  Vivian pushed down her sunglasses so she could look at Lucy tint-free.

  “Girl, you better slow down on those shots. It’s not blue, but you could still spew.”

  “Nahhhh, I’m good. I’m on vacation,” she said, then pushed her feet into her flip-flops.

  “Yeah, but you’re drinkin’ like a deformed Houston ship channel fish.”

  “Silly Viv,” Lucy laughed, and put her hand on Vivian’s shoulder. It could have been for effect or so she wouldn’t fall over, Vivian couldn’t tell. “You know fish can’t survive in the ship channel,” and she ambled off toward the ladies room.

  With Lucy out of earshot, Kate said, “You know the saying ‘one tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor’?” she pointed towards Lucy. “Well she’s on three.”

  Vivian watched Lucy grab for the restroom door handle and miss. Got it on the second try though.

  “I can’t remember her slamming back drinks so quickly,” Wendy said, pushing her bottle into her koozie. “Not even in college.”

  “She always liked tequila, but she was never a big drinker. Not like moi!” Vivian said. “She’s usually our designated driver.”

  “I wonder if there’s more to the Steve story than she’s telling us,” Kate said with concern. “She has to be stressed out about something to be suckin’ ’em down like this.”

  The three of them groaned. Vivian’s groan was for Steve-trouble. They had all been there, done that, some of them more recently than others.

  “We’ll talk to her this week, she’ll probably open up,” Wendy said. “The time away will do her good. Distance making the heart grow fonder, and all that.”

  Vivian picked at a piece of lime on her beer. “They’ve had years of ups and downs. She m
ay reach a different conclusion,” Vivian said. “Either way, she needs to lighten up on the tequila or she’s going to regret it in the morning.”

  “Hell, she may be in the restroom regretting it now,” Wendy said, then proposed a toast.

  “Here’s to a vacation of no regrets.” They clinked their green bottles together and drank to that.

  CHAPTER 6

  LUCY, WALKING a little straighter, returned from el baño just as Manuel delivered the food, four settings of silverware, napkins and salt and pepper.

  “Thanks Manuel,” Wendy said, and made Lucy a plate. She put quesadillas on one side and started to put ceviche on the other. Lucy shook her head.

  “No way,” she said, wagging her finger. “That fish is raw.”

  “It is not!” Wendy continued to put it on her plate. “I was a skeptic, too, until I saw the lemon and lime juice cook the fish in front of me. It’s really good, Lucy, low fat too. Just try a small bite. Please?”

  “Un-uh, no way. The tequila won’t make me sick but that will,” Lucy said, gesturing at the fish. “Just give me an extra quesadilla.”

  Wendy handed Lucy the plate, but as she did her arm knocked over the salt shaker and granules formed a pile on the table.

  “Oopsie,” Wendy said, not thinking twice about it, but Kate gasped.

  “Hurry, throw some over your shoulder,” she said.

  “Kate, I don’t believe in that stuff.”

  “Well, do it anyway, for me.”

  “Fine,” Wendy said taking a pinch. “Which shoulder?”

  Kate’s mouth twitched from to the side as she thought about it.

  “I can’t remember. You aren’t supposed to look over your right shoulder at a new moon, or is it your left? And then the salt goes over the other one.”

  “Geez,” Wendy said, and tossed some over both. “There. I’m covered.”

  Kate sat back, satisfied.

  Wendy scooped up a big bite of the ceviche and stuffed the whole thing into her mouth, just to gross out Lucy. “Mmmm, yum yum!”

  Lucy ate her quesadilla slowly. Too slowly in Vivian’s opinion. That girl is hammered.