PORN STARS... More Than Just Moans

by Joseph, Fabiola;L. Ramsey, Matthew

  There were hundreds of popular porn stars standing at their booths, and walking around. Besides the stars, I saw all kinds of crazy things going on, there were people playing naked twister, artists doing body paint on naked females, people dressed in all kinds of costumes, ladies were lube wrestling in a large blow up swimming pool, people were riding this huge mechanical penis, strippers dancing on poles behind glass. The strippers were also giving free lessons, and having contests for the ladies who could do the best pole tricks. We walked a little further and there were some girls in laced panties lying on a bed passing out free samples of condoms. Most of the females in there were wearing sexy lingerie, racy clothing, or they were damn near naked. I saw some new shit that I didn’t know existed like 3D porn, which was kind of cool, some life sized sex dolls called Real Dolls, and some female sex robots that could hold conversations, and have intimate encounters with its owner. We could only walk a few feet before someone would stop us to ask us questions, give us compliments, and to take more pictures. I’m not rude, so of course, we stopped each time. By this point all I wanted to do was smoke, eat, smoke, and then fuck Tyree. All of those hot guys hitting on us all day made me horny, and I was sure Tyree felt the same. We grabbed something to eat at the bar of our hotel, and then went up to our suite to do everything that I was in the mood for. The next day Tyree, the girls, and I hung out, we went shopping, sightseeing, and rode some of the rides along the way. One of the rides that we decided to try was the roller coaster of New York-New York. It was cool because the entire hotel was made to look like New York City, and the coaster was designed to look like a taxi cab. DeeDee made it clear that she was not a thrill seeker, and that she wasn’t riding any of the coasters.

  “You can count me out. DeeDee don’t do roller coasters.”

  “Aww, come on, girl. Live a little,” I replied.

  “That’s exactly what I’m going to do, and I’m going to live my ass right here. You can risk your life if you want to, but I’m not a risk taker. Besides if I get on someone will have to ride alone, so this way it works out perfectly.”

  “Are you sure you don’t mind waiting? The line looks kind of long. It’s probably going to be a thirty minute wait.”

  “Yeah, I’m sure. Go ahead and have fun. I’m going to get a soda, smoke a cigarette, and chill right here.”

  “Okay cool. We’ll meet you here after we get off.”

  Twenty minutes later it was our turn to ride. Tyree wanted to sit in the front seat so Ebony got stuck riding with him. Jazzy and I like crazy rides, but neither of us will sit in the front. I don’t know Jasmine’s reasoning behind it, but my way of thinking is if the roller coaster falls off the track the front will most likely be the first to hit the ground, so hopefully if you’re in the middle there’s a chance you’ll live. The ride was so much fun that I laughed the entire time. Afterwards Jazzy and I walked over to the souvenir shop to see how our pictures turned out while Tyree and Ebony met back up with DeeDee. Jazzy had her eyes closed while I was smiling with my hands up in the air. I looked over and saw Tyree and Ebony’s photo.

  “Look J, Tyree and Ebony were so scared, look at her face.”

  “I see, she closed her eyes and had to hold Tyree’s hand,” Jasmine replied.

  “I didn’t even catch that. Damn she was terrified.”

  I started laughing because I never saw a picture of two people that scared on a ride before. I couldn’t wait to tease them about it later. I brought two copies of each so we all would have one to remember that day. After we met back up with everyone else we were hungry and decided to eat lunch at the Gallagher’s Steakhouse inside of the New York New York Hotel and Casino. It was a cute fancy restaurant. A little pricey but the food was really good so it was worth it. After we finished eating I showed everyone the photos, and Ebony looked so embarrassed because everybody was laughing her out. Then, we started to talk about the awards show.

  “So are y’all excited about tonight?” I asked.

  “I’m excited, but I’m so nervous,” Jasmine replied.

  “Why?” Tyree asked.

  “Well, what if I win? I have to get up on stage and talk in front of all those people. I have a little speech prepared, but what if I get up there and forget everything I want to say,” Jasmine replied.

  “If you forget everything just play it by ear, and speak from the heart. It’s the AVN’s, to porn stars it is serious, but you don’t have to be so serious on stage. You’re not winning an Oscar on live television you know. Just have fun with it, because everyone else will,” DeeDee stated.

  “Hold up I have to say something to Jasmine.” I paused and waited for everyone to look at me. “What do you mean if you win? You do know were winning a few awards for our movie right? So get those nerves out of your system girl because we’ll definitely be on that stage a few times tonight.”

  “We better win. We deserve it,” Tyree said throwing his two cents in.

  “No, trust me I know we will,” I said.

  “I know that’s right Jamar. I love your confidence. I hope next year we’ll all be back here again and I’m nominated for something,” Ebony said.

  “Just keep doing what you’re doing girl and you will.” DeeDee assured her.

  “DeeDee, were you nervous the first time you won an award?” Jasmine asked.

  “Of course, I think everyone is a little nervous before walking on stage, but I wasn’t nervous about talking in front of everyone, or forgetting my speech. I was nervous I’d trip and fall and embarrass myself,” DeeDee replied.

  “Oh, shit, I’ve been so nervous thinking about what I’m going to say that falling never crossed my mind,” Jasmine said.

  “Oh, great thanks DeeDee, for putting that imagine in her head. Now she’s going to be even more nervous,” I stated.

  “Hell, she asked, so I answered. Jasmine you don’t have anything to worry about. You’re going to be just fine, and the more you walk up on that stage the more you’ll relax and love it,” DeeDee said as she looked at Jasmine.

  Jasmine smiled, and then said “I know. Once I’m there and had a drink or two I’ll be fine.”

  We left the restaurant and headed back to the Palm’s so we could all get ready for the awards show. Once Tyree and I were in the suite he rolled a blunt for us to share while I gave him some head. Once we, or should I say once he was finished, we showered then started getting dressed in our suits. We were both looking fine and ready so we headed down to the bar for a drink while we waited for the girls. DeeDee had to meet up with Mr. Cappello, but Jasmine and Ebony met us at the bar, and both of them looked gorgeous. When it was almost time for the awards to start we headed to the ballroom that was set up for the show. We found our seats and thanks to Breeze we were all seated together. The awards show was nice and definitely entertaining. Most of the adult stars were dressed to impress, unlike their public image that they’re known for in photos and magazines. Forty minutes passed before our categories approached. I actually started to feel anxious. I couldn’t wait to accept the awards I worked so hard for. Not only would the nominations help me maintain a successful porn career, but I knew if I won more producers would be requesting me for their movies; and they would hire me at a higher rate. Tyree was the first to win for best male in a gay porno. I was happy for him, and I could see it written all over his face the moment the presenter said, “Konceited” that he was thrilled and thought he was the man. He walked up to the stage calm and cool. He kept his speech short but sweet. He thanked Breeze and Fantasy Pictures for giving him a chance, all of the producers for making him look even better on film, his fans for supporting him, and most importantly myself for being there for him, and for introducing him to a whole new lifestyle. Jasmine was next to win for best new cummer, and she looked beautiful on stage. I knew she was happy she won because it showed. She didn’t appear nervous at all and gave a nice acceptance speech. Tyree and I, along with a few others were nominated for best gay group scene, but we lost to the
boys over at Treasure Media. I lost best male deep throat to Blaze, who I didn’t even know was in Vegas let alone nominated for an award. I wasn’t upset though because he deserved it. Nobody can make twelve inches of dick disappear with ease like Blaze. He makes it look easy, but trust me it’s not. Plus, I knew it would help blow up his career. Breeze would have to pay him more money per scene now. By this point I was starting to feel left out, and didn’t think I was going to win anything. Jasmine won again for best female before I finally won for best gay scene, the one award I didn’t care if I won or not. I won it with Domingo for the scene we filmed for “Dicking Down Domingo”. I accepted it on both of our behalves, and thanked Domingo for a hot scene and wished him the best. I thanked my fans, and everyone who had made it possible for me to make it that far. After that the awards kept coming in. Jasmine and some sexy ass performer named Lust won for hottest ebony duo. Then, Jasmine, Tyree, and I won all three of the categories that we were nominated for, and we made shorter and shorter speeches each time we went back on stage together.

  Chapter 15

  VEGAS, HERE I COME!

  Things were going okay in the passing weeks. Vegas was only a day away and my career was looking up. Jamar had put me on to the club game and I was bringing in big bucks. I was so damn nervous the first time I had to get up on that stage by myself, but I sucked it up and put on my game face. There was a big turn out and the fans put me at ease. Once I heard them cheering me on and saw the excitement on the men’s faces, everything fell into place. I even got turned on as the men were damn near drooling and lusting over me. It was like a power trip and I wanted more. I had gained the 10 pounds I had lost plus 5 extra, boy was that work. I ate everything in sight and loved my new plump ass and hips. I looked like the real Boricua I truly was. Everything was going good at work. I had filmed three movies in the past week. The names were, Jezebel’s Jubilee, which was about a couple who decided to swap partners on their honeymoon. Jungle Jezebel, in which I had to dress up like Jane from Tarzan. I did one scene in Mile High, where everyone got down on a realistic jet that was built in the warehouse, but I just had a “head” scene, which was okay with me.

  Ebony had become a permanent fixture around the warehouse and was there even when she didn’t have a scene to do. She was soaking in as much as she could in hopes that she would become a top biller like the rest of us in our clique.

  “Why are you leaving so early?” Ebony asked as I gathered my duffle bag and headed out of the dressing room.

  “Girl, please, my job is done for the day, and I can’t stand being around these hatful bitches for too long, it may rub off,” I said with a smile. She was a sweet girl and I was trying hard to like her. But there was something in her that was putting me off. I watched her dealings with DeeDee and it seemed to me like Ebony wasn’t putting as much into their friendships as DeeDee was. Watching Ebony flirt with Mr. Cappello was disgusting. I had heard that she was sharing a bed with not only DeeDee but with the head man in charge. That she was hardly sleeping at home and spent most of her time with them. It wouldn’t have been a problem if she did it in front of DeeDee but she was always dropping game on him when DeeDee was gone.

  “Anyways, I have to really start packing for Vegas. Did you find out if the company was sending you?”

  She stood up and got close to me so that the other women in the locker room wouldn’t hear.

  “I have been meaning to talk to you about that. Since I am so new and my first film won’t be out until next week, Breeze said that I have no reason to go. I’m gonna try and work my way in with DeeDee and Mr. Cappello, but I know I won’t want to room with them. Do you think that if I fly in I’ll be able to share a room with you, is that offer still on the table?”

  I wanted to really have time to think about it. Like I said before, she was cool and all but I didn’t want to get too close. I know that she was considered to be Jamar’s good friend and roommate, but I just wasn’t too sure about her.

  “Let me find out about Breeze and I’ll let you know.”

  I got out of there before she asked me anything else. I headed up to the office to say goodbye to Breeze and collect my check. Once again I was stopped by the yelling in Breeze’s office and a glass crashing against the wall.

  “WHAT IN THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU BOY. DIDN’T I TELL YOU THAT WE WEREN’T GONNA USE THAT SHIT ANYMORE. WHY CAN’T YOU FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS?”

  “YOU ARE SUCH A HYPOCRITE DAD. YOU ARE THE ONE THAT TOLD ME ABOUT MIXING THAT SHIT INTO PEOPLE’S DRINKS. NOW YOU WANNA GET ALL HIGH AND MIGHTY, PLEASE.”

  I heard Mr. Cappello take in a deep breath and let it out slowly.

  “You are making my life so fucking hard, Breeze. All I need you to do is listen when I fucking talk. NO MORE USING THAT SHIT ON POTENTIAL ACTORS. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?

  “I can’t wait to get the fuck out of here. I am so tired of being your damn punching bag. Maybe while I’m in Vegas you’ll see how much work I really put in around here.”

  “You’re not going and that’s final.”

  “WHAT, I’m supposed to be flying in with Tanya, and what about Jazzy, I told her that I would be there for her?”

  “I’m going, and Tanya can fly there on her own dime. I don’t want her in my private jet that I paid for. As for Jazzy, she can fly with DeeDee, and I.”

  “This is going to be her first year there and I was going to show her the ropes. I have to be there for her dad.”

  “Oh, give me a fucking break. You did everything you could to make sure she didn’t get nominated for any awards. You even tried to blackball her nomination for her movie with Lust. How fucking dumb can you be? Those nominations and wins are what separate the stars from the ordinary and there you were trying to roadblock her. I thought you said you cared for her son? It’s a good thing I’ve been good to the people in this industry. Someone was nice enough to call me and tell me that someone had it out for one of my top earners. How do you think I felt when I found out it was my own son?”

  “Dad, it’s not about the business…that was personal.”

  “I DON’T GIVE A FUCK. WHEN IT COMES TO MY STARLETS IT’S ALWAYS BUSINESS. SEPARATE YOUR DICK FROM YOUR POCKETS, SON. IF YOU CAN’T DO THAT THEN THIS IS NOT THE JOB FOR YOU.”

  Breeze said nothing. I was fuming behind the door and my heart skipped a beat when I heard Lust’s name, but I decided not to show it. I knocked on the office door and asked for my check. Breeze handed it to me and I left the office and half way ran to my car. I sat there without starting it and just thought about things. Everything in me was telling me that I was one of Breeze’s drugging victims the night I filmed with Lust. I remember feeling out of it and woke up with an unusual hangover. I sat there wondering who the fuck it was that I was sleeping with. What kind of crazy sick monster was he? Being a little bratty bitch with a big ego was a far cry from a psychotic person who went around drugging people. I knew that I was already playing his crazy game he considered life, but I didn’t want to end up being a dispensable pawn when he found no more reason for me to stay around. He was so controlling that he would rather I not win anything just to keep me in the palm of his hand. Damn, every time I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt, he was right there to fuck it up.

  *****

  That night I went home and refused to pick up Breeze’s phone calls. I knew that this would drive him crazy, forcing him to drive over to my house, and that’s exactly what I wanted. I wanted to see what he would come up with when he had to tell me why he wasn’t going to Vegas with me. I wanted to see his face when he would have to lie and tell me his dad’s reasoning behind his choice in going instead of sending him. I wanted to know if he would hesitate or flinch when he was going to blatantly lie in my face. And like clockwork, as I packed my suitcase, my doorbell rang. I greeted him as if nothing was heard or wrong.

  “Where were you, baby, I must have called 10 times,” Breeze asked as I kissed him hello.

  “Really, my phone must still be
on silent,” I lied as I walked over to my phone and pretended to put the ringer back on.

  “So, are you all packed, I’m just about done?”

  I was on my way back to my bedroom and he was behind me. I made sure to turn around and looked directly in his eyes when I asked my question. He stuck his hands in his pockets and jingled his keys. I said nothing as we stood in the doorway to my bedroom.

  “Well, that’s what I was calling you about. I was talking to my dad earlier and I got some bad news. He told me that since he was going to Vegas with DeeDee, I would have to stay back.”

  “But, why? I thought you told me that you wouldn’t let me go alone?”

  He put his arms around my waist and didn’t flinch one bit as he lied.

  “You know that I am the second in command. There’s a lot that has to be done. Films, photo shoots, and interviews. We both can’t be gone. Trust me, I tried to fight him on this but he wasn’t gonna let DeeDee go to Sin City on her own.”

  “I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS SHIT,” I yelled as I stormed to the room. I was about to put on an Oscar winning performance and he would be none the wise.

  “What am I going to do without you there? I need you; you’re supposed to be my rock. I can’t do this alone, wait, maybe I can call your dad and change his mind. He seems to like me enough. If this is just about work then maybe he can get Rickie to fill in, he is the manager right?”