For all that she blew my mind with her strength of will, she did have history. I refused to be like any of the other fucking bastards she’d lain with. I refused to force her in any way.
She had to come to me when she deserved for me to kneel at her fucking feet.
Anger spilled into me, but I refused to let it leak into the kiss. I just let her find her way, let her take what she needed from me and slowly, I felt the change in her.
Those exploratory caresses, like how it was when you first learned to kiss, morphed into something else. Growing tenser and wilder, hungrier as her need grew.
Need she felt for me.
My dick pounded, the ache so strong, so overwhelming that I wanted to groan in her mouth, but I was terrified I’d trigger a flashback. I knew how those felt, and the last thing I wanted was for her to remember what it felt like to be in another man’s bed.
The rigid composure I imposed on myself was a small measure of self-punishment. It was the least I deserved for the shit I’d put her through, for the hell I’d made her endure.
As her tongue thrust against mine, her breathing became choppy, and I closed my eyes as the sweet torment of her finding her passion in me overtook everything else.
It was there in the sweet flush on her cheeks, the bright gleam in her eyes when they opened to reveal a stark wonder that let me know she’d never been this turned on from a kiss like this before, to the jiggle of her tits with each panting breath.
When she rubbed those sweet mounds against my pecs, a groan escaped me—I couldn’t help myself. Talk about heaven and hell all at the same fucking time.
Somehow, I managed to keep my hands down by my sides, but it was too late.
She’d heard.
She stopped.
She moved away.
Wanting to curse under my breath but concerned she’d take it as my being mad with her, I opened my eyes, half expecting to watch her move off the bed. But she didn’t. If anything, she was peering down at me with a confused frown.
“Maverick?”
I blinked up at her, adoring the tousled state of her, the way her lips were pink from our kisses, the way she was flushed and bright and so fucking alive that I wanted to drown in her.
“Hmm?” I rasped, my gaze glued to her mouth. Which started to smile. Revealing white teeth that gleamed in the low light of morning, and which had the tiniest crooked slant to her front, bottom set.
Even that was perfect to me.
“Aren’t you enjoying this?”
I blinked again. “Huh?” That had our eyes tangling.
“You’re lying there like I’ve tied you to the bed.” She frowned. “Do you need me to? I know everyone has their kinks.”
Christ.
I cleared my throat. “No, I don’t need that.”
“Are you sure? I’ve done it befo—”
“No!” I barked, then quickly muttered, “I’m fine. I’m just trying not to lose control.”
“Ah.” She winced. “You have issues with control?” Her gaze glanced over my dick. “Is that it?”
Despite myself, I had to laugh. “You’re doing that on purpose, aren’t you?”
Her grin peeped out. “Well… you’ve been waiting a long time for sex. I’d imagine you’re close to bursting.”
I grabbed her hand and rested it over the covers which were tented by my hard-on. “I can handle a bit of teasing.”
“Good to know,” she retorted, but I could feel her amusement and was warmed by it.
She wasn’t scared.
I’d figured she would be.
Like Alessa had read my mind, she whispered, “I was frightened at first.”
“Not anymore?”
“You love me. Physically, you won’t hurt me. I know that.”
I wanted to flinch at her addition of the word ‘physically,’ but hell, I could make no promises about mentally or emotionally, could I? Not when I was dealing with something that made me flicker between the past and the present.
“Later on, we’ll go to the hospital,” I promised her.
“I was going to suggest that before we rested yesterday, but I knew you needed the sleep. You don’t seem to like your doctor.”
If it was Barry Beau, then she was right on the money.
Fucker was the cunt Lesley had cheated on me with—they’d even gotten engaged at one point.
“I don’t wanna talk about that,” I muttered. “I just want you to know that I’ll get treatment. I’ll do whatever to make sure I don’t hurt you again.”
Her gaze softened. “See? Ya shchaslyva z toboyu, Maverick.” When she danced off into Ukrainian, somehow, I felt like we’d turned a corner, and she confirmed that by sliding her hand underneath the covers, flipping her fingers beneath the waistband of my boxer briefs, then letting them come around my dick.
A sharp breath escaped me because it had been a long time since anyone else’s fist had been around it, and when she started to jack me off, speaking to me all the while in Ukrainian, I wasn’t sure whether it was good or bad to have her talking to me with words I didn’t understand.
Then, words didn’t matter. Shit, I didn’t give a fuck about them because what she did with her hands?
Holy fuck.
I hated how she’d gained the experience, but sweet, sweet, sweet Lord… George Harrison started serenading me because she squeezed and teased and rubbed and did something with her fucking thumb that had my eyes blurring. In a way I assumed had nothing to do with the CTE either.
My hips started to jack up and down, rocking in time to each flick of her wrists, and with every drop of pre-cum spilled, with every groan that whispered from my lips, with every clench of my fists into the sheets, she took me to the brink.
Not of arousal—I was already so far past that I was in another fucking state.
Not of need—she’d had me wrapped around her fucking finger since the first time I’d met her. Even when she’d been sick, I’d needed her. It had just been a different kind of need.
This was what a man felt for his woman.
What a man craved from his other goddamn half.
Even as I felt the leash on my control start to snap under the pressure of her fingers, I clung to it, needing to remain calm, needing to remember that being gentle with her was imperative, but with each goddamn twist of her fist, of her thumb over the glans, working her magic with every fucking stroke, I felt the beast inside me claw free. I couldn’t contain it, just… God help me, I couldn’t.
I snapped.
I let go.
I broke.
Surging upward, I rolled into her until she was flat on her back and I was on top of her, her legs were high around my hips, my dick was against the soft heat of her covered pussy.
I expected fear in her eyes, a stillness to her that stemmed from shock, and maybe both were there in the tiniest of increments, but mostly I saw a reciprocal fire that burned for me.
A thirst so deep for me that I knew it’d take a lifetime to quench.
More Ukrainian spilled from her, and I knew what that meant—she’d lost her English.
And I took that for the sign it was.
I reared up so I could shove my boxer briefs down, just far enough to grab a firm hold of my cock and to release it from the cage of my underwear. With my knees digging into the mattress, I used the space I made to shove her panties aside, and when I encountered glistening, creamy flesh, I groaned.
Fuck.
Just…
FUCK.
I gritted my teeth as the need to taste her warred with the need to fuck her.
I thought I’d have to go slow. That I’d have to walk her gently through the process.
But she was ready for me.
She wanted me.
And I knew that was the depth of her love. Of her trust.
God, this woman. She gave and she gave and she fucking gave.
I didn’t deserve her.
But she was mine.
And i
t was time I proved that to her.
I notched the tip of my dick against her slick folds, rubbing it through her juices, getting myself wet, torturing myself with the first pussy I’d had in years, and as my eyes fluttered into the back of my head, I pushed into her.
With enough wherewithal to stay calm, I didn’t thrust as hard as I wanted to, I gently surged into her, filling her up with me. With the only dick she’d ever know again. One that’d erase every other fucker’s presence she knew.
I’d get her so cock-drunk on mine that she’d forget her past. She’d remember it only in her nightmares, and I’d spend a fucking lifetime erasing those too.
If I had to endure CAT scans and Dr. goddamn Beau’s thermometer up my ass, if I had to go to Bethesda again, if I had to endure treatment after treatment, I’d torment myself on the hunt for a solution so that my Old goddamn Lady never had to know a moment’s pain from me.
Because the space between us was too much to bear, I moved atop her, covering her slim frame with my weight. She clung to me, her arms coming around me, her legs cupping me, and I stared into her eyes, not letting anything come between us, not allowing it, vowing to never allow it again as our noses touched, and our breath brushed the other’s mouth.
Slowly, I rocked my hips.
Carefully, I moved into her.
Gently, I made love to her.
Showing her what that felt like, knowing from what she’d told me before that she’d been inexperienced before she’d been sold.
And then, as her tension began to leach out of her, being replaced by a different variety, she stopped simply accepting what I gave her.
She started taking.
She rocked back.
She moved into me.
She made love to me.
No longer pliant in my arms, no longer just a doll beneath me.
Her nails dug into my back, her heels pressed into my butt. She tightened her cunt around me, she held me so close I knew that two people had never been this close before, and as I ground down into her, making sure that with every thrust my pelvis rocked against her clit, I watched her fly.
For the first time in a man’s arms, she flew.
She experienced freedom.
Something I’d spend the rest of my days giving her.
Her orgasm triggered my own—my self-control was good, but it wasn’t that fucking good. Within seconds of her cunt throbbing around me, I exploded into her, and as I let out a sharp cry, she moaned, sobbing something in Ukrainian as she clung even harder to me, holding me tight, so tight that I knew she’d never let go.
Ever.
And that was a promise I needed to feel, not just hear.
Thirty-One
Alessa
Tiredly, I rubbed my eyes as I crossed my feet at the ankles, staring at the same damn piece of wall I’d been staring at for hours.
My phone buzzed beside me, and I picked it up when I saw that Giulia had created a group chat. One she’d labeled ‘Giulia’s Posse.’
Lips twitching at the sight, I entered the chat, and laughed some more.
Stone: Why’s it named after you?
Giulia: Because I started the chat. If you’d started the chat, then you could have called it Stone’s Posse.
Stone: I’d never be so egocentric.
Giulia: No? Well, you snooze you lose.
Lily: This is handy, actually. I’m surprised one of us didn’t think of it before.
Indy: This is all I need. You bitches talking all day, blowing my phone up with notifications.
Stone: Did someone talk? I didn’t see anything.
Indy: Grow up, would you? I’m sorry I didn’t tell you first about Cruz and me, but it wasn’t like I could call you up when I was inking myself.
Stone: Can someone tell Indy that she’s full of bullshit?
Giulia: I’ll tell her! Indy, you’re full of bullshit.
Tiffany: You know she’s your boss, right? o.O
Lily: Like Giulia would care about that.
Giulia: I know. *whistles* But I’m armed with more needles and catheters than a doctor now. She’s afraid of me.
Indy: Hardly. Frankie didn’t even let you pick up any equipment when she came in.
Giulia: I know where it’s kept. That’s half the war won.
Indy: *snorts*
Giulia: Alessa? You there, honey?
Me: I’m here. Just reading. It takes me longer to understand like this.
Giulia: Huh, I never thought of that.
Me: Don’t worry. I can catch up. Is everything okay?
Giulia: I thought it was time we were all on the same page.
Tiffany: Sounds ominous.
Giulia: It is. We’re not like our mothers. I think we can all agree with that. Whether they were MC or not, we’re not like them.
Giulia: We’re stronger, and we’re not going to take any BS. Amirite?
Me: You’re right.
Indy: Yeah.
Tiffany: God, no, I’m not like her.
Lily: I refuse to be like her.
Stone: I sure as fuck ain’t like my mom.
Giulia: Music to my ears. Well, now that we’re definitely agreed on that, I think we have to get together to stop our fucking Old Men from thinking we’re like the last gen of bitches. They ain’t about to ride over us.
Me: Maverick doesn’t ride roughshod over me. If he did, I don’t think we’d be here today.
Stone: I’ll be by shortly, honey. To help explain everything. I hate that prick Beau.
Tiffany: If ever there was a man who didn’t deserve the name.
Me: Why? What’s it mean?
Lily: It’s French for handsome.
Me: Oh dear, yes, that’s a very poorly fitting name.
Giulia: Hahaha. Dude got burned by Alessa. That’s how you know he’s an ugly motherfucker. Don’t think I’ve ever heard you insult someone before, babe.
Me: Well, I’m no angel. I’m sure me and Maverick will be insulting each other before the day is out. He’s getting tired and I don’t blame him. He’s starting to snipe. I’m going to try to keep him calm but I don’t know if that’s doable.
Me: He’s been in and out of different scans all day. Dr. Beau is really taking this to the limit.
Me: I’d say he thinks Maverick will change his mind before he gets all the data he needs.
Stone: Probably. This is his pet project. I know for a fact he’s been working with the Jets, trying to create some kind of special helmet or something.
Stone: It’s all the talk around the wards.
Giulia: You guys really know how to live it up.
Stone: Sure do.
Me: What are the Jets?
Tiffany: Football team.
Me: Oh. Why?
Stone: Football players suffer with CTE a lot. Didn’t Beau explain that? I thought he had.
Stone: Anyway, they get it a lot from all the trauma to their heads during the game.
Stone: He’s trying to figure out how to pay off his student debts before he’s forty, I think.
Indy: She’s being sarcastic, Alessa.
Stone: Actually, I wasn’t. I meant it.
Indy: So you’re talking to me again?
Stone: Only to tell you you’re WRONG.
Indy: *flips two birds at you*
Stone: I take your two fingers and snap them. Without setting them after. >.>
Indy: That’s mean.
Stone: I know it is. It’s a BETRAYAL. Seeing how you’re good with betrayals, figured you’d be okay with that too.
Indy: For fuck’s sake, it isn’t like I haven’t told you everything else!
Giulia: Just wait while I grab some popcorn. This sounds interesting.
Indy: Fuck off, Giulia. Stone, you’re really starting to piss me off.
Stone: Tough shit.
Me: Tink opened the gate for the sniper who helped detonate the bomb.
Okay, so that wasn’t the best timing for revealing such a sorry piece of infor
mation, but I liked Stone. She’d helped me and the others back at the start, and she was always working right now. I’d barely seen her since the blast, and I knew she was doing too much because she was still recuperating from her own injuries while working long shifts.
As for Indy, I didn’t know her so well, but I knew that both women were old friends. Old friends shouldn’t be at each other’s throats like this.
Giulia: Say what?
Stone: Are you fucking kidding me, Alessa?
Indy: Those goddamn clubwhores. I hate the fucking bitches. I shit ‘em all.
Giulia: I’d say that sounds uncomfortable, but now isn’t the time for laughing matters.
Giulia: Alessa, how did you figure that out?
Me: Lodestar was showing Maverick a rundown of what happened the night of the blast.
Me: Tink opened the gate to the compound, let the sniper in, then got into the truck with him.
Stone: Holy fuck.
Lily: Jesus. This isn’t going to end prettily.
Tiffany: She must have had a death wish.
Stone: She had one of those when she tried to fuck MY man.
Giulia: True dat. Hmm. You know we can’t leave this to the brothers, don’t you?
Me: Leave what? It isn’t like we can do anything.
Giulia: Fuck that. There’s plenty we can do.
Giulia: This isn’t council business, this is bitches’ business.
Indy: I wish you’d stop calling it that.
Giulia: Why? Why shouldn’t I call it that? It’s the truth.
Giulia: This kind of crap needs to be dealt with in-house. We need to teach the fucking skanks a lesson they won’t forget.
Me: What kind of lesson?
Giulia: She needs to x.x.
Me: What does that mean?
Indy: Something that isn’t repeatable on a device that isn’t encrypted I’d guess.
Lily: I think it’s time we had a party at my place. We can talk about things there.
Lily: I have to go because Rex is coming to talk to me about the books.
Me: Which books? Anything I might like?
Lily: No, LOL. I mean, the accounts. I’m starting to work on the MC’s business accounts for them. Trying to take some of the load off Maverick’s shoulders.
Me: Oh, sorry. I feel stupid. :/
Giulia: Don’t you dare. As if you’re stupid. It’s English that’s stupid.
Maverick: A Dark MC Romance (A Dark & Dirty Sinners' MC Series Book 6) Page 25
