Giulia: I like the sound of this party, Lily. When and where? Needs to be before Nyx is back, or he’ll have crawled up my ass to make sure I’m safe.
Tiffany: That sounds like it’d be more Link’s area.
Lily: Shut up, you. :P
Tiffany: Sorry, it was too perfect to resist.
Giulia: Ladies, let’s keep this PG.
Indy: Because going all ‘eye for an eye’ isn’t R-rated?
Giulia: Hey, I don’t make the rules.
Lily: How about tonight then?
Me: I could probably do that. Maverick’s going to be asleep for the rest of the day. I don’t think he’ll be home tonight.
Stone: I’ll kill that fucker Beau if he put him through too much. You only just got him back!
Giulia: How’s it been, Alessa? Everything okay?
How did I begin to describe how perfect this morning had been?
In the face of how shitty today was turning out to be, it shone a brighter light on how perfect things were when it was just me and him. Alone. Together.
God, how he’d felt inside me was too difficult to explain.
There’d been no disgust, no revulsion. No pain. Just pleasure. Delight.
I bit my lip at the thought.
Me: Once we found out Rex was on his way home, we spent most of yesterday and last night asleep.
Stone: Maverick’s likely to need more rest than before, Alessa. There’s no need to worry.
Me: Oh, I wasn’t worrying. :) I know I needed the rest, so why wouldn’t he after all he’s gone through?
Giulia: If he treats you like shit—he’ll have me to answer to.
Warmth filled me.
Giulia’s Posse… I quite appreciated being a part of it.
Smiling, I tapped out: I’ll be sure to tell him.
A squeak sounded down the corridor, and I looked up and saw Mav being wheeled back on a gurney. His hand was rubbing his temple, and I just knew he’d need me.
Me: Have to go. Mav’s just come back. Speak later x
Shoving my phone into my pocket, I rushed over to him and darted down the corridor at the same speed as the nurse pushing the gurney.
“Are you okay?” I murmured softly.
When he just shook his head, I knew words were beyond him. His eyes were loaded down with a misery that could only come from pain, but there was recognition there, so that gave me more relief than I could say.
I wasn’t sure if there’d ever come a time when I looked into his eyes and wouldn’t seek out that lack of awareness I’d grown accustomed to of late. Maybe in time, I would, but I doubted it.
Someone like me appreciated everything they had, and mourned everything they lost.
When the nurse wheeled him into the private room, leaving us alone with the proviso that the doctor would be on his way, I climbed onto the gurney the second he’d gone, and I whispered, “Go to sleep.” I wanted to tell him that I’d protect him, but that was ludicrous… Didn’t stop the words from whispering through my mind though.
He raised his arm with a grunt, let me snuggle into his side, and I pressed my head to his chest, uncaring that within ten minutes I’d regret the position when my entire body went numb from pins and needles. I felt the tension in him though, situated as close to him as I was with nothing between us except for a blanket, my shirt, and his hospital gown, so I reached up and gently rubbed his temple.
It wasn’t a miracle cure, just a simple caress, but he slowly, increment by increment, relaxed, and for some reason, that made me feel more like a wife than ever before.
Thirty-Two
Maverick
“Hey, Ken. Just got your message.”
That was partially a lie. I’d seen I had a couple of missed calls, and that he’d sent a text, asking me to phone him when I had a minute, but Alessa had been with me.
Because of the extent of the tests, which were going to carry on into the morning, that fucker Beau had decided I needed to stay overnight. I wasn’t happy about it, and when I’d seen Ken’s messages, I knew I had to get rid of Alessa. She already knew far too much than was good for her.
It wasn’t even about spousal immunity—knowing too much was bad for her. Our enemies weren’t always legit alphabet agencies.
So I’d told her to go home, even though I didn’t want her to take a fucking step outside the hospital without me. Didn’t matter that I was as much use as a coffee mug made out of chocolate, didn’t matter that she had a prospect guarding her ass, only when I had my eyes on her did I know she wasn’t in danger.
“Hey, man! I have some news—”
“A heads-up first. I got my memory back.” I winced. “Most of it. I don’t remember our call, and if you hadn’t told me in the message that the test results had come in, I wouldn’t even know I’d asked you for something. As it stands, I don’t know what I asked you about.”
Ken’s sharp inhalation said it all. “Jesus, Mav. Someone upstairs ain’t cutting you much slack, are they?”
A laugh escaped me. “Nah. But after all the shit we pulled, maybe that makes fucking sense, huh?”
“Probably. If we don’t land our asses in hell, I’ll consider us lucky.”
“You? Laughing about hell?” I arched a brow he couldn’t see. “Stopped being a Methodist?”
“Take me out of the sandbox, stop aiming a gun at me, and apparently I chill the fuck out.”
Snorting, I muttered, “Good to hear. Apparently, I didn’t get the same memo.”
“Apparently goddamn not.” Ken cleared his throat. “What’s with the beeping?”
“I’m in the hospital. Getting some tests. My memory came back yesterday, but the headaches are fucking killer.”
“Shit, I’m sorry, man.”
“Not your fault. Anyway, how are you doing?”
“You know we already had this conversation, yeah?”
“That Maverick did, I didn’t.”
When he told me about his wife and kids, I’d admit to being glad. If ever there was a man who needed to be settled down, it was Ken.
“Anyway,” he said after a little while. “Figure it’s time to let you know what you got in touch with me for… Your clubhouse was involved in a blast, and you found some DNA samples from the guy who detonated the bomb.”
Surprise hit me. “Shit, I did?” And I hadn’t told the council?
Hell, what the fuck had Star got me wrapped up in?
Whenever she came back into my world, I had to lead two lives. I got sick and goddamn tired of playing Janus because of her.
“Yeah, you did,” Ken replied, but he sounded amused.
Rubbing my eyes, I grumbled, “Okay, hit me with it. You find out who our sniper is?”
Ken hummed. “Guy’s a pro. Got a streak of blood that zigzags all over the nation. Interpol tagged him as a pro as well, what with a few kills taking place over in Europe. His jobs vary—nothing too standard. Anything from an adulterous housewife in Atlanta to a businessman who was close to retirement. No standard kill method either. Hit and runs, shootings, knifings… you name it.”
“Christ. How the fuck did we get on his radar?”
“No idea. Got an ID for all its worth considering he changes them like he changes his dentist. Guy Paris.”
I snorted. “Fake much.”
“Yeah, not the first either. Andrew Moscow. James Madrid… guy’s got a thing for capital cities.” Ken cleared his throat. “Something did roll up when I ran his details though.”
“What?”
“It isn’t the first time he’s been in your area.”
I scowled at my blanket covered feet. “No? When?”
“Eight years ago. It’s unusual because he’s a kind of ‘one and done’ guy, but for whatever reason, he’s visiting West Orange again.”
“Who did he kill eight years ago?”
“Well, that’s just it. It was an unsolved hit and run. Apparently, the driver got out and left a fingerprint on the victim’s throat.”
<
br /> “Why the fuck would he do something asinine like that?” I growled.
“A marker. That’s how each of these cases are tied together. It’s his signature. He always leaves something so that people know it’s him. Maybe that’s how he gets paid?”
“Jesus,” I muttered.
“Anyway, it’s someone from your club. Woman called Rene Banks.”
Rene.
Rex’s mom.
“Fuck. Ken, thank you so much for getting this info to me so quickly—”
“You need to spread the word. Get it, man. Totally get it. But hey, please don’t be a stranger? It was good to hear from you.”
“Agreed,” I told him firmly, meaning it. “I won’t let it be long before I’m in touch again. Thanks for everything, brother.”
“You’re more than welcome.”
No sooner had I cut the call with Ken did I connect another one.
I hadn’t seen any of my brothers since I’d regained my memory. This morning, after making love to Ghost, I’d known I had to act before, like a chicken shit, I cut and ran. I fucking loathed doctors, but for her, I needed to make sure that I was doing all I could to get better.
My health, right now, wasn’t a priority.
For whatever reason, a so-called ‘one and done’ sniper had made a visit to West Orange again. This time, he hadn’t just killed the Prez’s Old Lady and triggered an episode that had almost destroyed the Sinners, he’d blown the clubhouse apart. Killed brothers, destroyed lives…
I hated to admit it, but it was starting to look like Lodestar was right.
There was a bigger picture at play, and it was time my brothers knew the whole story.
Before they died because of it.
Thirty-Three
Alessa
Fully expecting for the kitchen to host our little party, I walked in only to find Stone and Indy sobbing in each other’s arms. The second I was inside, I was hauled out again, Giulia shoving a glass of wine at me as she grabbed my arm and dragged me out.
“Leave them to it,” she muttered. “Indy’s been trying to explain about Kevin, you know?”
I winced. “Na khuy.”
“No idea what that means, but it sounds as bad as the situation merits.” She squeezed me. “I think they’ll be a while.”
As we headed for the great room, I immediately walked over to one of the plush sofas and sank into its depths. When I was settled, I took a deep sip of wine, and afterward, grinned at Lily who laughed pointedly at the now half empty glass.
“Needed that?”
“Badly. Maverick was a pretty good patient, but it’s been a hell of a day, and seeing him in pain was hard.”
She winced. “I never realized seeing the person you love in pain could hurt so much.”
“Probably the sign of true love,” Tiffany remarked. She was sitting on the same sofa as me, but she had her feet tucked under her, and a pair of bright pink fuzzy socks which just peeped out from under her butt. In her hand, she had a can of White Claw she was nursing.
“Love equals pain?” Giulia released a disgruntled sound. “That’s bullshit. With Nyx at my back, I know I can handle any-fucking-thing. That seem like a bad thing?”
Tiffany shot her a look. “You’re all riled up. I wasn’t trying to piss you off.”
Giulia grunted. “Sorry.” I watched as the smaller woman bounced on her feet. “Got a lot of energy.”
A smile played on my lips. “Are you missing Nyx, Giulia?”
“I hate that I am, but yeah.” She winced. “I’m one of those women now.”
“What? In love?” Lily said dryly. “You think I don’t miss Link? It’s weird going to sleep without him now.” She shrugged. “I figure we should embrace the ‘old’ in Old Lady.”
Huffing, Giulia grumbled, “We’re still in our early twenties.”
“So? Love is ageless.” Lily grinned, then burst out laughing. “You should see your face.”
“Maybe it’s the baby that makes her look like she wants to puke,” I teased, amused to note that Giulia did look a little green around the edges.
Giulia’s nose crinkled. “Nah, I’m surprisingly barf-free… very horny though. Very horny.”
“So it’s not Nyx you miss, just his dick?” Tiffany mused, laughing when Giulia threw a pillow at her.
“I’m almost tempted to ask Link to get a piercing just so I know what it feels like. It’s on my bucket list of things to do before I die.”
A snort escaped Giulia. “If you think Nyx would let me handle his brother’s dick, then you’re crazy.”
“Never said I wanted you to handle my boo’s family jewels, now did I?” Lily retorted.
Amused even though I understood roughly eighty-five percent of what they were talking about, I noticed a wistful expression on Tiffany’s face as she watched Giulia stride back and forth in front of the massive fireplace.
Having miscarried recently, it made sense that she’d be feeling nostalgic. By now, she might even be ready to give birth.
What was it about us, I wondered, that attracted torment and distress?
I had no answer for that, not when whatever ‘it’ was had also brought the men we loved into our worlds, but did one truly have to experience so much pain to appreciate the joy of the love we’d been granted?
I knew that I, for one, could have coped without the last couple weeks. I’d endured hell, been treated worse than if I were a pig, and yet, somehow, this past month was worse than it all.
Emotionally, I couldn’t cut myself from it. Whereas in the past, whatever my owners had done to me, I’d managed to maintain distance. I’d spent a good chunk of eighteen months totally unaware of where I was, in a kind of fugue state that enabled my mind to be in a whole different place than where my body was. I’d only woken up from that when I’d been purchased by Luke Lancaster at an auction.
That was when a whole other episode of my nightmare had commenced.
Before, I’d been kept in a house. One with a bed. With a functioning toilet.
Lily’s brother had stored me in a cage like I was a dog to let out at his whim.
A shudder rushed through me as I thought about those times, thought about the filth, the stench, and how much worse it had become when the other women had gradually been added to his stocks since his father was using us too.
“Alessa?”
Lily’s soft voice drew me back into the conversation. I shot her a weak smile. “Yes?”
“Are you okay?”
Tiffany sat up slightly. “You had a funny look on your face.”
“Maybe I was born that way,” I teased, raising my wineglass to hide my expression.
“BS,” Giulia rumbled. “What gives?” When she stopped pacing and folded her arms across her chest, I knew none of us were going anywhere until she got answers.
And seeing as I fully intended on returning to Maverick’s bedside tonight, I didn’t have time to waste.
“I was just thinking of before, is all.”
As a one, the women winced.
“I didn’t mean to bring the mood down,” I said softly. “That’s why I didn’t want to talk about it.”
“Maybe you should talk about it,” Tiffany told me, her tone gentle. “We’ve stopped having our group chats. It’s not good for any of us.”
I was almost surprised when Giulia didn’t scoff at that. She hadn’t been a part of the chats as much as the rest of us had, but she’d always found her way to them whenever we got together. Maybe she hadn’t been there from start to finish, but she’d always popped by.
After what my tormentor had done to her, who could blame her?
Giulia was not the kind of woman who was easy with being a victim. She couldn’t simply accept her fate, switch her mind off, lie back, and take whatever someone wanted to dole her way.
She was a firecracker, only this time, she’d been burned. It was clear to me that loss of control was something she’d never forgive herself for, even though h
er attack was completely Lancaster’s fault and not hers.
“You’re right,” Lily muttered, biting her lip a little before she continued, “Without Link here, I’ve been having nightmares again.”
Giulia wriggled her shoulders. “I haven’t been having nightmares per se…”
“No? Bad dreams then?” Tiffany questioned, her lips tilting up in a smile. “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.”
That had Giulia grunting. “I miss Nyx is all. I miss how he makes me feel.”
“How is that?” I asked softly, curious about what she’d say.
It took a few moments for her to reply, but when she did, her words had warmth filling me. “He makes me feel invincible.”
Lily released a choked laugh. “It’s funny you should say that because Link makes me feel visible. It’s so strange. I’m valued not just for my hymen or my name or my family’s reputation… I’m Lily. That’s all I am to him. Lily. His Old Lady.”
Tiffany’s eyes were watery as she confessed, “When I’m with Sin, it’s like I can take a deep breath when, before, I was hyperventilating or something. He makes me feel strong, but more than that, he helps me be stronger. He believes in me. Believes I can do anything I set my mind to.” She swallowed. “It’s a wonderful feeling.”
“It is, considering we were bred to be walking wombs,” Lily said bitterly. “Crazy how the men we’re with are the exact opposite of what our families would want for us, but they lift us up instead of tearing us down like our kin would and did.”
“I wasn’t a walking womb before,” Giulia muttered, “but I know what you mean. Mom would roll in her grave if she thought I was with a biker. She’d tell me I was a stupid little bitch who didn’t learn from the lessons she’d had, but Nyx… he’s nothing like my father.”
“He’s whipped, is why,” Indy remarked as she wandered into the room, her arm slung around Stone’s shoulders as they headed to one of the empty sofas. With three large ones set around a coffee table that overlooked the fireplace, it was easy for all of us to find our own space, to get comfortable.
Maverick: A Dark MC Romance (A Dark & Dirty Sinners' MC Series Book 6) Page 26
