A Fragmented Journey (The New York Journey Book 1)

by Gracie Guy

  “Good. Several new contracts.” Kara couldn’t meet her friend’s eyes. Some irrational fear told her Robin would find out about Mark and she wasn’t sure she was ready to tell anyone.

  “Then why were you crying?”

  “I wasn’t.” Kara tried lying.

  “Hell you weren’t. Your face was all blotchy and swollen when you opened the door.”

  “Robin, what do you want me to say?” Kara stood midway between the counter and table. “I recently found out that my husband has been cheating on me.” She held her hands up in frustration. “Oh yeah. And by the way. He’s also dead.” The words spit out of her mouth.

  “Yep.” Robin wasn’t bothered by her outburst. “And you’re not.”

  Kara sighed at the obvious lecture that was coming.

  “Listen, Kara. Don’t forget who you’re talking to here.” Robin’s voice went up an octave. “I know this sucks. I know it’s hard as hell to rationalize. But Dan’s behavior might actually have helped you out here.”

  Kara cocked her head in question, squinting her eyes at her friend.

  “Look, the night Brian died, he was on the way to Stewarts to get breakfast materials because I hadn’t picked them up earlier in the week. It was Saturday night and he used to make breakfast for me every Sunday if we were home. Bacon, eggs, home fries, and toast. Kinda classic, bad cholesterol stuff.”

  Kara watched as her friend fiddled with her beverage. “We’d just made love and I was bemoaning the fact that I wouldn’t be treated like a princess in the morning. So he went out to get the stuff.” Robin paused a second. “And never came back.”

  They sat in silence for a few minutes, each one of them embracing the warmth of the teacup they held.

  Finally, Kara spoke. “I’m sorry. I never knew.”

  “No one ever knew. This is the first time I’ve admitted my own selfishness killed my husband.” Kara saw the tears start to pool in her friend’s eyes. “But it’s different for you.” Robin’s voice grew husky with emotion. “That horny bastard died being unfaithful to you.” The dogs sat up when she slapped the table. “You should be frigging furious!” They moved closer to Kara in response to Robin’s outburst.

  She patted their heads. “It’s okay.” Taking a peek inside her cup, she decided on a refill. As she stepped to the stove to start the water heating, she knew it was time to come clean about Mark.

  “Robin, here’s the thing. Dan wasn’t the only one being unfaithful.”

  “Whhaatt??” Her friend spun around in surprise.

  “Well, not exactly unfaithful.” Kara carried the fresh tea to the table. “I met a man at the Atlanta conference. His name is Mark.” She watched the smile start to twitch at the edges of her friend’s mouth. “Don’t get me wrong. Nothing happened. But I did find him adorable.” Kara felt herself grin. “But I was married and he respected that.”

  “So I get home. I’m feeling a pinch guilty. But then all hell breaks loose. And you know the rest of the story from there.”

  “Kara, if nothing happened why did you feel guilty?”

  “This guy, Mark, made me feel special. He asked me all kinds of questions about work. Dan never did.” Robin sat quietly. “And honestly, things have been getting a little weird between me and Dan.”

  “Weird how?”

  “You know, sex.” Kara could feel the blush start on her cheeks. “He was always asking for something different. Something more.” She looked down at the table, drawing invisible circles with her index fingers to keep them busy. “Then he started bringing home sex toys. And the things he did with them hurt me.” She was mortified telling this to her friend. But she needed to tell someone. “So I refused to do it.”

  “And what’d he say?”

  Kara shook her head at the memory. “Every time, he would make fun of me. Telling me I was a boring prude.” She looked out the window into the dark yard. “Then he’d stalk out of the bedroom, pour himself some whiskey, and sit in the living room watching porn until he got his rocks off.”

  “How’d you know?”

  “Cause he usually left soiled paper towels, with the tumbler, on the coffee table.”

  Robin wrinkled her nose when Kara described the mess. “What a pig. Did he think he was teaching you a lesson?”

  “I don’t know.” Kara shook her head. “I just don’t know.” She stood and stretched. “What I’m left with, is that he went looking somewhere else for the stuff I wouldn’t do. And I’m no longer sure if I’m angry or sad.”

  “So did you see this guy Mark this week?”

  “I did.” Kara nodded ever so slightly. “Yes, I did.”

  “And when will you see him again?”

  “Three weeks from now in Dallas, and in San Francisco in eight weeks.”

  Robin took her cup to the sink and rinsed it out. She turned to her friend. “That bugger Dan didn’t deserve you.” She gave Kara a hug. “I’m glad you met this new guy.”

  Robin’s response was a relief to Kara. “Thanks.” She watched as her friend pulled on her coat and headed to the door.

  “Kar, you don’t need my permission to be happy. Stop being so hard on yourself.” Robin blew her a kiss as she crossed the front porch. “I’ll call ya!”

  Chapter Fourteen

  Two days into her supervisor-imposed vacation, Kara was glad he’d insisted on the time off. There was a great deal of work to preparing the house and barn for winter—cleaning the chimney, cutting, splitting, and stacking firewood, reinsulating the water pipes in the barn. And she’d never done it all by herself—Dan was always a part of the process. Unfortunately, this time alone left wide-open room in her head for thinking. And more thinking.

  While she dragged the twenty-four foot fiberglass extension ladder from its rack on the side of the barn so she could get on the roof, for the first time, Kara doubted her future. This is hard. What if I fall off the roof? The dogs aren’t even out here to keep me company. She pushed the fears from her head. She couldn’t start the fireplace without cleaning the chimney first. She had to get this done.

  Resolutely, she lifted the top end of the ladder, working her way to the middle, raising the end high enough to lean on the edge of the porch roof. She untied the poly rope, pulling down on it to extend the ladder. Once the top was a few feet higher than the edge of the roof, she made sure the rung locks were securely in place and retied the rope around both sections. Then she took another rope, tying the bottom of the ladder to the porch railing.

  Kara decided to take a quick break before climbing topside. As she entered the kitchen door, the dogs gave her a warm reception, following her to the sink for a drink of water. Leaning on the counter, she looked at their aging faces. Dan had gotten them as puppies and they’d always been part of the relationship since they were two years old—when Kara met all three. At first, they were reluctant to trust her. How ironic; now they were totally dependent upon her.

  “Okay kids.” Their ears perked up in syncopation. “The chimney isn’t cleaning itself. Do you wanna keep me company outside?” She got her answer when she opened the door, watching them bolt to the side lawn to do their business for a minute before returning to her.

  Kara slipped a set of pliers in her back pocket and then grabbed the handful of fiberglass chimney rods in her left hand, leaving her right to guide her way up the ladder. When she reached the top, she carefully stepped onto the roof, taking great pains to avoid any loose stones on the shingles. She crossed to the peak of the roof, silently complimenting herself on making it to the chimney.

  Before starting her project, she took a few minutes to take in the beauty of the woods. This section of the Adirondack Mountains was called the High Peaks and her present elevated status gave her a great view. Anytime she’d gone higher in the woods on horseback, the canopy of the forest had always blocked her view. Right now, a stunning pallet of oranges and reds signaling the coming of winter in upstate New York greeted her.

  “Okay. Get to it girly!�
� Ever vigilant, the dogs whined when they heard her talking. “You’ve seen Dan do this many times.” First Kara pushed the rod holding the large square brush down into the chimney flue. Using the pair of pliers, she added another when the threaded end was at the edge, repeating the process over, and over. She kept adding rods until she felt the brush fall out of the flue, coming to rest at the bottom of the chimney. Reversing, she pulled the thirty-foot rod back out, flopping it over her shoulder so it didn’t damage the roof.

  When the brush reached the top, Kara smiled as she pushed it all back down the chimney. “See. I told you so!” She was grinning from her perch, despite the black soot building up on her face as it wafted out of the chimney. After the third repetition, Kara decided the chimney was clean enough and pulled the brush all the way out. Carefully, she slid the entire length to the edge of the roof and very slowly made her way to the ladder to climb down.

  With both feet firmly planted on the ground, Kara tilted her face skyward, basking in the sunshine. “You rock girl!” She was so proud of herself for not giving in to fear and hiring a chimney sweep. “I got this whole single thing under control.” The dogs started dancing in circles. “Of course, maybe I should stop talking to myself.” Chuckling, she started to dismantle the chimney brush and rods, then packed them away in the canvas duffle storage bag Dan used. She returned the ladder to the side of the barn and was about to start another winter prep project when she heard an automobile coming up her long, curvy driveway.

  The dogs barked maniacally as an SUV came into view; she squinted in curiosity. Who is this when I look so bad? She pulled off her leather gloves, brushing loose hair from her face. Her hands shook slightly when she recognized the trooper stepping out of the dark four-wheel drive. Seriously? What is he doing here? With a single whistle, both dogs sat at her feet.

  “Sergeant. To what do I owe this unexpected visit?”

  “Hello, Mrs. Elliot.” He extended his right hand to her. “I thought I’d give you a quick update on your husband’s case.”

  Kara’s belly pitched at the idea of resolving the circumstances that caused Dan’s death. “Really?” She cocked her head at him. “Wouldn’t it have been easier to call?”

  “Probably. But I was in the area.”

  She watched his face as he scanned the property. I don’t remember him being this handsome. Taking advantage of his distraction, Kara took stock in his appearance: a deep navy blue suit, white shirt, black tie and black wing-tips, occasional flecks of gray showing in his closely-cropped strawberry-blonde hair. I wonder if he’s married. Her stomach shifted, again, but this time it was out of shock at her own thoughts.

  Kara dusted off her jeans and pointed to the house. “I was just about to get some water. What can I offer you?” Without waiting for an answer, she climbed the porch steps, expecting him to follow.

  “Water’s fine. Thank you.”

  When they entered the house, his eyes did yet another scan of his environment.

  Do all cops act this way? What’s he looking for? She pulled out a chair from the kitchen table. “Have a seat Sergeant.”

  “Thank you.” He nodded as he accepted the bottle of water Kara pulled from the refrigerator.

  “So give me the news.” She hoped he didn’t hear the nervousness in her voice.

  “We have a lead on the man who called to report an issue at your cabin.”

  “Who is it?” She put her water on the table so he couldn’t see her shake.

  “Honestly, we don’t have his name, just a picture. And he’s gone out of state so we’ll be sending a pair of officers down to tail him. Once we have a concrete identity, we’ll have him brought back to New York.”

  “Oh.” Kara felt herself deflate. Sensing her disappointment, the dogs nudged her hands in her lap.

  “Are they always this close to you?” John pointed to the dogs.

  “Pretty much, now.” She rubbed their heads before looking at the muscular man filling the space at her table. “Dan was always their favorite parent. But I’m all there is now.” Blinking back tears, she stood and walked to the sink. “They’re good company, but not much help when it comes to work, like cleaning the chimney.”

  “Is that what you were doing when I pulled in?”

  “Yep. Just finished.”

  By now he was standing by the door, looking out the window. “This place looks like it might be a lot of work for one person. Are you sure you’re up to it?”

  Kara spun to face him, fully intent on blasting him for questioning her strength. But when their eyes locked, she saw compassion, not mockery. “I— I think I’ll be okay.”

  Her stomach did another dip while she struggled to break contact with him. She knew she had to change the topic. Right now she was on seriously thin emotional ice when anyone showed her kindness, let alone someone as attractive as this man. “Would you like to see the horses?”

  “Um, yeah, but I’m not really dressed for it.”

  Kara gave him a dismissive wave. “Oh pish. We’re not going to roll around in mud.” She led her unexpected company out of the house and through the barn. When they reached the back gate, she gave a high pitched whistle. Within seconds, both mares were barreling for the barn. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw John step away from the locked gate, opting to stand just inside the protection of the wall. A light chuckle escaped her lips. “What are you doing over there?”

  “Staying out of the way. I’d just as soon leave here with all my limbs intact.”

  She burst out laughing at the sight of this burly trooper hiding behind a wall because of her girls. “They’re not going to hurt you.” She pulled him by the sleeve of his suit while reaching over the gate with her other hand. “The bay is Diva and the chestnut is Maple.”

  “Are those colors?” He was shaking his head in confusion.

  “Oh, wow. You don’t know anything about horses, do you?”

  “Nope, pure city boy here. Anything I know about a horse I learned in the betting lines at Saratoga.”

  “Oh, got it. The darker one is Diva. She’s a bay Morgan, a tough little nut who will live to be at least thirty.” That got his attention.

  “Say what? Isn’t that old?”

  “Not for her breed.” Kara rubbed Diva’s head while she spoke to John. “Now Maple is a chestnut Quarter Horse. Her life expectancy isn’t much past twenty-five years.” John stepped back as Diva bared her teeth at her roommate. Maple, in turn, spun on her hind feet and took off across the pasture to avoid being bitten.

  “They make your dogs look small.”

  “Nah. They’re all a bunch of babies. And, they’re my babies.” She reached down to pat the head of both dogs. “Do you have a dog?”

  “Nope. Not since I was in high school.” She watched him slide his hands into his pants pockets, causing the material to tighten on his thighs, revealing impressive glutes. “My hours are long and vary so much. It wouldn’t be fair to have one.”

  As they walked back across to John’s car, she noticed that he was still sweeping the yard with his eyes. “Are you looking for something? Or someone?”

  “Occupational hazard.”

  His unconvincing tone of voice caused the hair on her neck to stand up. “Hhmmm, sounds stressful.” She watched his face to see if he’d flinch. But all he did was reach into his jacket to pull out a small leather wallet and a pen.

  “Listen, if you need anything,” he flipped a small white business card over to write on it. “The numbers on the front are my office, but I’m not there very much. My cell is on the back.”

  Kara reached to take the wallet and pen from him, a bolt of fire passed through her fingers as she lightly grazed his hand. Pulling a card out of the leather, quickly she wrote something on the back and handed it back to him. “And that’s my cell.”

  “Seriously, Mrs. Elliott, if you need anything, call me.”

  “On one condition Sergeant.” She smiled broadly at him, playing a game of human chess.
r />   “And what’s that?”

  “That you’ll call me Kara.” Pushing the leather wallet and pen into his hands, her gaze was riveted to his.

  “Agreed, if you’ll call me John, not Sergeant.” Kara felt her breath stop when a dimple-laden grin split his face. Check mate!

  “You got it, Serg…I mean, John.”

  Both of them were laughing openly when he started his SUV and pulled down her driveway. She sat on the porch steps for a few minutes, petting the dogs and thinking about him. Her mind kept wandering back to the sight of his thighs. He’d kept his hands buried in his pockets when they left the barn, and each step he took gave her another peek at his tantalizing physique. He’s pretty sexy, surely he’s involved with someone.

  When she realized that an afternoon chill had set in, Kara decided it was time to bed the horses down for the night and take a shower. After a quick, non-conventional dinner of oatmeal, she broke out the pile of bills she’d been avoiding since Dan’s funeral. She decided to sell his truck and boat, leaving the cash set aside for emergencies or property taxes.

  In her early twenties, before she met Dan, Kara had decided she didn’t want to worry about money, so she’d worked her ass off to be financially independent. But her plan really didn’t include supporting such an expensive property by herself. And she didn’t want to fritter away Dan’s life insurance on bills. She thought it should go toward something more tangible. But what?

  Dropping the boat, truck and her own life insurance brought her monthly costs down about six hundred dollars. She pulled out other random bills, like the subscription renewals for the hunting and fishing magazines he ordered, decided to cut nearly half of the TV channels on the satellite bill, and cancel his cell phone—giving her roughly two hundred more. Then she remembered her health insurance. Ever since Dan had decided to work as a lone-wolf independent contractor, Kara had been responsible for carrying it for both of them — with his death, she could drop the family plan and go on a single one at half the cost.

  When she was finished reorganizing her bills, she’d found nearly a thousand dollars per month. Wow. Maybe I can afford this place alone. With a newfound sense of freedom, Kara was able to fall asleep easily for the first time in weeks.