by Nikki Paris
“Lizzy, goddamnit! Come on! Do you want to die? I’m trying to save your life here!”
I rolled my eyes and turned away from her, sinking onto the curb to wait. As much as I didn’t want them to, my eyes traveled back over to Dani. She was wearing a tiny little cotton nightgown and no fucking bra, again. She was cold, according to her nipples, and I could see the outline of her panties. Fucking Princess Dani was really getting under my skin lately. I was still thinking about the little red dress she wore last weekend. “Hey,” I yelled over to her.
Her big blue eyes flashed over to meet mine. She narrowed them at me and snapped, “What?”
“You ever heard of clothes?”
Dani’s glare got colder and more intense. She gripped her dog’s leash. “It’s the middle of the fucking night! This is how I sleep, asshole! You want me to pull on some jeans and a sweater while the g-goddamn fire alarm is going off? Maybe I should have started with fucking thermal underwear and tossed my winter coat over everything to spare you the view!” She threw an arm up in the air. “Or, here’s an idea for you: turn the other way and stop staring at my tits! Problem solved!”
I almost smiled. Princess Dani had me almost smiling all over the place.
Her little cocker spaniel barked at me and then laid back down at her feet. “Yeah, you tell him, Lizzy,” she grumbled before turning away from me, giving me a clear view of her famous ass. I unfortunately still remembered how it felt when she pressed it into me at the gym the other night.
That was a cocky little move on her part, but I had to hand it to her. She caught me off guard.
Dani turned back around to glare at me and caught me staring at her ass again. Shit. She put her hands on her hips. “Can I help you with something else?”
I glanced down at her dog. “Yeah, keep your damn dog quiet at night.” Her dog wasn’t that loud. I’d heard it barking only twice since she brought it home. I just had to get back at her for making me think about sleeping with her again.
Dani gaped at me. “Go to hell.”
Again, I felt the corner of my mouth twitching.
We waited outside our building for twenty more minutes before the firemen came and gave us the all-clear to go back inside. One of the downstairs neighbors had apparently started a small oven fire, but it was out now, and all was well.
I watched one of the younger firemen stop Dani to ask her a few questions. “Excuse me, miss? I’m just checking to make sure everyone’s all right and that everyone got out of the building. Did everyone in your unit make it out quickly?”
I rolled my eyes. He was trying to find out if she was single. Smooth.
Dani gave him her pretty little movie-star smile. “Yep. It’s just the dog and me.”
“Good. No boyfriend or husband?”
Seriously, dude?
The asshole wasn’t looking her in the eye. He was staring at her braless tits. He was definitely gearing up to ask her out now, and I felt the overwhelming urge to sabotage this budding romance.
I still had a couple of dog treats from work in my jacket pocket. I pulled one out and walked a few feet behind Dani and her fireman, holding the treat out for her dog.
The dog perked up and quickly sniffed out the treat in my hand. When I was sure I had its full attention, I dropped the treat at the base of the stairs and then headed up to my apartment.
I glanced over my shoulder to see Dani’s dog yanking on her leash and sprinting toward the stairs. “Oh, shit! Lizzy!” Dani chased after her dog, leaving the fireman without a date.
I dropped a few more treats on the stairs as I went, ensuring that Dani would continue up after her dog instead of going back to the fireman. I told myself I did it simply because I liked messing with Princess Dani. It had nothing to do with jealousy. That would be crazy. I didn’t even like the brat.
◆◆◆
Amy and Devin invited me to dinner the next night, and I grudgingly agreed. I’d finished pouring the rest of my alcohol down the drain after the fire alarm bullshit, which meant I had nothing better to do.
I showed up right on time, and my seven-year-old nephew, Marshall, excitedly pulled open the door. “C-C-Connor! Hi hi, h-h-hi! Y-y-y-y-y-you w-w-w-anna sssssee my new LEGO set?”
“Hey buddy! I’d love to!” I said.
Amy stood behind her son with a worried look on her face. “Marshall, buddy, remember to take deep breaths and relax your voice box, so your words don’t get stuck.”
“Yeah yeah yeah, m-m-m-mom.” Marshall rolled his big brown eyes and sprinted up the stairs to his room.
Amy sighed and watched him go, and then she exchanged a look with me. “Some little asshole neighbor kid told him he didn’t want to play with him because he talks weird.”
I shoved my hands in my pockets. “Where does this kid live? I’ll make him disappear.”
Amy laughed and wiped a tear from her eye. “The mama bear in me almost wants to take you up on that offer.”
“How did Marshall take it?” I asked.
“He didn’t even want to tell me at first. I just noticed his stutter getting a lot worse all of a sudden, and he started saying really negative things about himself. So one night, I wouldn’t let him out of his room until he told me what was going on.” Amy sighed. “It broke my heart. I wanted to just say, ‘well fuck that little asshole!’ but I went with a more mature, motherly response. I told him that not everyone was going to like him, but he needed to like himself anyway.”
“That’s solid advice, Aims.” I put my arm around my sister. “Marshall’s tough. He’ll pull through this.”
Amy rested her head on my shoulder. “What about you? How are you doing?”
I shrugged. “I’m fine.”
“Are you?”
“Yep.”
“Hey, Devin’s sorry for trying to force you on a date. You know we just want to see you smile again, right?”
Marshall saved me from answering by rushing back downstairs with a massive LEGO spaceship.
“Bud, careful running with —”
Suddenly the spaceship slipped from Marshall’s hands, and LEGOs rained down the stairs. “N-n-n-no!” Marshall yelled, sinking to his knees at the bottom of the stairs. When he looked back up at us, tears filled his eyes. “I-I-I-I-I-I I w-w-w-w-w-worked so h-hard on th-th-th-th-that!”
I immediately knelt on the hardwood floor next to him, scooping up LEGOs in my hand. “I’ll help you fix it, man. You still have the instructions?”
Relief passed over my nephew’s face. “Y-y-yeah! Thanks, C-Connor!” He flung his arms around my neck.
Amy smiled down at us like her heart might burst. “See, Con? You’re a nice guy with a lot left to give to the world.”
I rolled my eyes and ignored her. Sure, I had time and patience for my awesome nephew. I also took excellent care of family pets. But I knew Amy was talking about romance, and fuck that.
I carried handfuls of LEGO over to the kitchen table with Marshall until we got every last piece.
“Th-th-thanks, Connor. I-I-I think we sh-should build something n-n-new.”
“Yeah? Like what?”
Marshall sat next to me and tapped his chin. “L-like m-m-maybe a boat or or something?”
“That sounds awesome. I love boats.” I smiled down at my nephew and messed up his hair. He was one of the few people in the world that could still make me smile. I listened to Marshall describe how our LEGO boat should look, and my thoughts drifted to Princess Dani. I could have sworn I’d heard her stutter just like Marshall. I almost let myself wonder what she’d say if I asked her for advice on helping Marshall’s confidence.
But there was no way in hell I was going to have a real conversation with that brat. Ever.
8
Dani
“Sup, Dani? Are you too poor to eat now or something?” Tanner leaned against the pantry doorway in our parents’ house and watched me with a grin.
“Oh, shut up. Mom invited me to d-dinner, and I’m h-helping h
er c-cook!” The kid did have a point, though. Funds were running low—even after downsizing everything in my life— and I’d started sending out resumés. Yay. I grabbed a box of pasta and elbowed my brother out of the way. “Is your g-g-girlfriend coming tonight?”
A dark look passed over Tanner’s face. “We broke up.”
“No!” I gasped and flung my arms around his neck. I was secretly happy because I didn’t like his girlfriend, but I wanted to be supportive. “Why didn’t you t-tell me?”
Tanner shrugged like it was no big deal, but I saw the hurt in his blue eyes. “It’s new.”
Our mom called over from the stove. “Danica, sweetie, did you get me the pasta? The water’s boiling!”
“Oh, yep.” I walked over and set the box down next to her, then turned back to Tanner. “What happened?”
He let out a long slow breath and ran his hands through his sandy hair. “She wanted to see other people.”
Tanner and Mila had been together since their senior year of high school — two years! Who could just throw that away? And Tanner was fucking adorable! How dare she? “Bitch,” I said.
“Danica!” My mother warned, but Tanner smiled, just a little.
“How’s your love life going?” Tanner tore open a bag of Doritos and popped one in his mouth. He passed the bag to me, and I grabbed a few.
“Kids! I’m seriously making dinner as we speak! Stop snacking!” Our mom rolled her eyes at us.
We ignored her and continued our conversation. “Ugh.” I groaned. I’d only just recovered from the asshole at the club. “Every guy I meet is a complete jerk.”
Tanner frowned at me. “I think that’s what women want.”
“No, it’s not!” I lied. I wanted Jerkface, big time. But not because he was a jerk. It was because he was hot enough to melt my goddamn panties every time I saw him!
Our mom interrupted our conversation and my thoughts. “Danica? Can you mix that salad like I asked you to?”
“Oh, mama, of c-c-course!” I smiled at her and walked over to hug her from behind.
She sighed, pretending to be irritated with her favorite child. “Salad, Danica.”
I pulled a head of lettuce, a cucumber, and a tomato from the crisper drawer. Then I grabbed a cutting board and a knife.
“How’s the job search going?” My mom asked.
I groaned. “I don’t have a job or a boyfriend, okay, guys?”
“Do you need money, sweetie? Or a place to stay until you get back on your feet? We have plenty of space!” My mom turned from the stove and smiled brightly at me. “I mean, you wouldn’t be able to bring your dog because of Tanner’s allergy, but you’re more than welcome to come home and figure things out.”
I rolled my eyes. “Mom, I’m f-f-fine. And even if I d-did come home, we wouldn’t get rid of Lizzy. We’d g-g-get rid of Tanner.” I grinned at my brother and went back to slicing cucumbers.
Tanner shook his head. “Too soon for those jokes, Dani. You realize Mila just got rid of me, right?”
“Aw, buddy! I’m sorry! Bad joke!” I bit my lip and gave him my sad eyes.
Twenty minutes later, we sat down to a nice family dinner, where Tanner and I argued and insulted each other, and our parents good-naturedly rolled their eyes. It was like a scene straight from My Sweet Step-Monster.
Damn. I missed acting. It wasn’t even the fame and attention that I missed —although I was a proud attention whore. Acting made me feel alive, and I loved how I could completely disappear into a whole new person with every role. It was a beautiful thing to me, and I was painfully close to never doing it again.
“You okay, sweetie?” My dad asked, pulling me from my nostalgic pity party. Damn, I was having a lot of those lately. Was there like a pity party punch card? If I had nine, could I get the tenth one free?
“Yeah, dad! I’m great!” I smiled and took a bite of my salad.
His light gray eyes studied my face for a moment, and then he nodded. “Okay, you just seem quieter than usual. Are you happy?”
He always asked us that question. It was like his version of “I love you.”
I looked right into his eyes and lied. “Of course.” Was I feeling like a lonely fantastic failure? Yup. Did other people have it worse than me? Absolutely. I wasn’t happy, but I was fine.
“Okay, guys. This was fun.” I stood and carried my plate to the sink. “I’ll see you all in like a year? Sound good?” I teased.
My mom rolled her eyes and stood to hug me. “I’ll see you next Saturday for your cousin’s baby shower.”
“Yeah, yeah.” I hugged her back and bent to kiss my dad’s cheek. Then I turned to Tanner. “You were always t-t-too g-good for Mila. Chin up, dude.”
I headed out the front door and down the driveway. The maple tree in my parents’ front yard was full of big green leaves, and when I glanced over at it, a buried memory flashed through my head. A little eight-year-old me stood under the tree, repeating the phrase, “Do you want to play with me?” over and over again until I could say it without a stutter.
That summer, a new family moved in down the street. They had two kids close to my age, a boy and a girl. I didn’t want them to know that I was the annoying stuttering girl. I so badly wanted them to like me.
Spoiler alert. When I finally worked up the courage to knock on their door, I stuttered like a goddamn broken record. The girl was nice, but the slightly older boy just raised his eyebrows at me and walked away.
Instead of being happy that I’d gained one new friend, I left that interaction obsessing over the kid that didn’t like me. I still remembered his name. Xaiden. I spent the rest of the summer being obnoxious, trying to get Xaiden to like me, but to no avail.
I winced and bit my lip when another buried memory from that summer surfaced. It was the last time I tried to play with Xaiden. I could still hear his voice when he yelled, “You’re annoying! Stop talking like that!” My eyes traveled up the street to the spot where he shoved me down on the hot asphalt.
I could still feel the little rocks embedded in my palms and knee, where I tried to catch myself as I fell. I could feel the hot tears that burned the corners of my eyes as I stood and limped back to my house, and the guilt that settled in the pit of my stomach when I lied and told my mom I fell off my bike. I didn’t want her to worry. It made her cry when kids teased me. I didn’t want her to cry.
A neighbor’s dog barked across the street and pulled me from my memory. I rolled my eyes and climbed into my car. Would I forever be obsessed with chasing the haters? Would I ever just be enough for myself and the people that loved me?
When I reached my apartment complex, I stopped to check the mail. It had been almost a week since I’d done it, so my mailbox was overflowing.
I sighed and started flipping through my various pieces of junk mail. Then I glanced up and saw Mr. Sexyasfuck Jerkface heading my way. He was still wearing his white lab coat like he’d just gotten home from work. He looked up, saw me, and rolled his eyes.
Asshole.
Suddenly the reason for our little game clicked in my head. He was yet another hater that I just couldn’t win over.
I should have been mature and walked away after that epiphany. But, goddamnit, I couldn’t let it lie. I couldn’t make the sexy asshole like me, but I could piss him off and make him uncomfortable. And, as the attention whore that I was, I fucking loved getting reactions out of people.
That’s all this is, Dani. You don’t need him to like you. You’re just getting an entertaining reaction.
I leaned up against the bank of mailboxes, making sure I was blocking the one with his apartment number. Then I began to open a credit card offer slowly.
Jerkface approached, cocked an eyebrow, and said, “Excuse me.”
I glanced up at him, feigning surprise. “Oh, hey! One sec. I just need to finish reading my mail.” I opened a money mailer next and started to flip through every single coupon. Fucking with him was one of the few things that made
me feel like my usual sparkly self again.
“Are you serious?” He said through clenched teeth.
“Always.” I didn’t look up at him.
“What the hell is wrong with you, Princess?”
I threw my head back and laughed. “So many things!”
He rolled his eyes and ran his hands through his dark, wavy hair. “Okay, move your ass, or I’ll move it for you.”
“Oooh!” I bit my lip and gave him a flirty smile.
I thought I was calling his bluff, but he glared at me, then swiftly scooped me up in his arms. For a second, butterflies rushed through my stomach. Then he dropped me on my ass on the damp lawn, sending my mail scattering.
I stared at him with my mouth open in shock. “What the h-hell! Are you going to help me pick all that up?”
He unlocked his mailbox, grabbed his stack of mail, and said, “Nope. Night, Princess.”
“Whatever, jerk!” I yelled after his retreating back. “Now m-my ass is all w-w-wet!”
He stopped to glance at me, and I could have sworn I saw the hint of a smile on his lips before he turned back around and continued walking.
Well, fuck it all! Who won tonight? I stood and then bent to pick up my scattered mail. If I was keeping a tally in my head — and I was — then Jerkface was ahead by at least three points. I had to find some perfect way to get back at him. I wanted a big old reaction from this hater.
I turned around, ready to march back up to my apartment when I saw Jerkface watching me from his balcony. I flipped him off, and he just smirked at me.
9
Connor
“Connor?” Jessie knocked on my office door. “There’s a lady here with a sick cat. She doesn’t have an appointment, but I know you have a break before your 2:30. Do you have time for a check-up?”
