Around the Bend (Sandy Cove Series Book 4)
Page 13
Turning back to the phone, he asked, “Did he say anything else about her?”
“Just that she’s his real mom.”
“Great!” Steve exclaimed sarcastically. “Thanks for letting me know. I’ll talk to Amber tonight.”
“You know, Steve, maybe it would be better if I talked to her,” Ben suggested. “I can come over, if you’d like.”
Steve turned to Michelle. “Ben’s offering to talk to Amber. What do you think?”
She nodded. “I think it would be a good idea. She’ll just get defensive if you approach her right now in your state of mind.”
Steve thought for a minute and then answered Ben. “You might be right. I’m pretty worked up. Maybe you’d be able to talk more sense into her than I could right now. But I hate to pull you away from home, especially this late in the evening.”
“I really don’t mind. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
After they hung up, Steve stood and began pacing the floor. “I can’t believe she’d pull this after all we’ve done for her.”
“She’s just lonely and confused, Steve,” Michelle said softly. But her eyes conveyed a fear that Steve was also trying hard to push away.
By the time Ben arrived, Michelle had made a fresh pot of coffee. While Ben and Steve talked in the kitchen, she went upstairs and knocked on Madison’s door. “Come in,” Maddie said.
Amber was sitting on the floor leaning up against Madison’s bed where the younger girl was sprawled out. They were both looking at fashion magazines.
“Amber, we need to talk to you for a minute. Would you come down to the kitchen?”
“Sure,” she replied innocently.
“Can I come?” Madison asked.
“No. We need to speak with Amber alone, honey. It won’t take long.”
When they walked into the kitchen, they found Ben sitting at the table and Steve standing, leaning against the counter, both with cups of coffee in their hands. “Hi, Pastor Ben,” Amber said, sounding surprised and nervous.
“Hi, Amber. Have a seat,” he replied, gesturing to the chair beside his.
She sat down stiffly. “Am I in some kind of trouble?” she asked.
“Well, we’re going to talk about that,” Ben replied. He invited Steve and Michelle to join them at the table, and they both sat down.
“Okay,” she said tentatively.
“So this morning when Caleb was over at our house, he told Logan that you had said he could come and live with you,” Ben began.
Amber looked down at her hands. “That’s not exactly what I said.”
“Okay. Why don’t you explain to us what you did say, so Steve and Michelle can clear this up with Caleb?”
She looked over at Michelle, who nodded her head. Clearing her throat, she began, “We were out throwing the baseball, and I just wanted to make sure Caleb really understood that the reason I gave him up for adoption was because I was too young to take care of him when he was born. Then I was thinking about what happened to Chad,” she paused and cleared her throat again, “and I thought that if anything ever happened to Michelle and Steve, I wanted Caleb to know that I was older now, and I could take care of him.”
“So you weren’t suggesting that he come and live with you now?” Michelle asked, beginning to relax a little.
“No. I mean, I would love to have him live with me. I’ve even been thinking about maybe moving back to Sandy Cove so I could spend more time with him, but that’s not what I was talking about. I just thought about what your grandfather said about no guarantees in life, and how we should live life with no regrets and everything, and I thought that Caleb should know that I really love him and would take care of him if he ever needed me to.”
“But you understand that he belongs here, right?” Steve asked. Michelle could see that he was fighting to keep his cool and let Ben run the discussion.
“Yeah. As long as you guys are both fine,” she replied. “I just said that if anything really bad ever happened and he needed me, he could come live with me.”
Ben cleared his throat. “You need to know that that’s not going to happen, Amber. Saying things like that will only confuse Caleb.”
She nodded, but Michelle wondered whether or not she really understood.
“Are you seriously considering moving back here?” Ben asked next.
“Maybe. There’s nothing for me in Arizona now,” she said, her voice getting a little shaky. “Don’t you think it would be good for Caleb if I was close by so he could see me whenever he wanted to?” she asked, keeping her focus on Ben.
“To be honest, Amber, I think the best thing for Caleb is to put a little space between the two of you right now. It seems like he’s getting confused about your role in his life and his future,” he replied. “If you try to push yourself on him, I think it will cause the very regrets you are trying to avoid.”
Out of the corner of her eye, Michelle could see Steve nodding his head in agreement.
Amber sat quietly, staring down at her hands. “Nothing ever works out for me,” she said through tears. “I’ve been trying to do the right thing and get my life together. Chad and I were doing really well, and we were making plans to get married and everything.”
Michelle handed her a tissue and she blew her nose.
Then Amber continued, “But no matter what I do, my life is always just a big mess. You’re probably right. I should stay away from Caleb so nothing bad happens to him, too.”
Michelle started to go to her, but Ben put his hand out and stopped her. He nodded toward the door to the living room, and Michelle and Steve took the cue and left.
When they got into the other room, Steve pulled her into his arms. “I’m sorry you have to go through this with her, honey. I never should have agreed to letting her tell Caleb.”
Pulling back, she looked into his eyes. “I believe her, Steve. I really think she was only talking about him living with her if something ever happened to the two of us.”
“Well, I sure don’t like the idea of Amber moving back to Sandy Cove,” he replied. “She’s got too much baggage, and Caleb doesn’t need that.”
“I agree. Maybe we can suggest an alternative,” she said, an idea suddenly popping into her mind. “What if we set something up with Amber where she can correspond with Caleb. You know—send little letters and photos back and forth every once in a while. Then she’ll feel connected with him without being right here in the area. And when he gets older and can understand things better, maybe she can come up for another visit.”
He hesitated as if mulling the thought over. “That makes more sense to me than a move,” he replied. “But we’d definitely have to set up some parameters. Amber needs boundaries. Maybe once a month at the most.”
“Yeah. I like that.” Michelle began to feel better as the idea settled in. “Right now, he’s not a good enough reader to be able to read her letters anyway, so we would be reading them to him and could even screen some of what she’s saying if we have any concerns.”
“Yeah. Good idea. We’ll discuss it with her tomorrow.”
After waiting about ten minutes, Steve pressed his ear to the door. Then he came back over and sat beside her on the couch. “Sounds like Ben’s praying with her.”
“Really?” Michelle felt a flicker of hope that the seeds she’d planted so many years ago might finally come to fruition in Amber’s life. More than anything else, she knew that if Amber would reach out to God, He’d help her find a new start and give her hope for the future.
When Ben and Amber emerged from the kitchen several minutes later, Michelle could see that her prayers had been answered. Amber looked like a very heavy weight had been lifted from her shoulders. And when Ben’s eyes met Michelle’s, she surmised that her former student had found her way to a heavenly Father who would never leave her nor forsake her. Knowing Amber, it wouldn’t mean an instant, radical change. But at least it was a start.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
“S
o I’ve been thinking a lot about my life,” Amber began as she sat across from Michelle at the breakfast table the next day.
Michelle sat forward in her chair. “And?”
“I think I might want to be a teacher,” she began. “It’s time for me to decide what I want to do with myself, and I think I’d like to do what you do.”
Michelle smiled. “That’s great, Amber. With your background and life experiences, you could be a very compassionate and effective educator. What grade level do you think you’d like to teach?”
“I’m thinking maybe upper elementary or middle school.” She paused.
“Sounds like a good plan to me. I’ve heard Arizona State has a good program.”
“I was actually thinking about going to OSU if I can get in. I could start at community college first for a year and then maybe transfer.” She glanced into Michelle’s eyes. She looked a little unhappy with the idea. “I’d move to Corvallis, of course, so I wouldn’t be too close by. But it would still give me a chance to come see Caleb sometimes.”
Michelle didn’t respond right away.
“I promise I wouldn’t be hanging around all the time.”
“It’s not that we want to push you away, Amber,” Michelle began. “But like we said yesterday, Steve and I think it’s a good idea to put a little space between you and Caleb for a while.”
Amber’s heart sank. She was hoping that somehow making a commitment to God last night might have changed her position in their minds. “So you want me to go back to Arizona?”
“For now, I think that would be a good plan. You could get your general ed classes behind you and maybe volunteer in a classroom for a semester, just to see what you think.”
She nodded.
“In the meantime, you and Caleb could write to each other,” she suggested.
Amber felt her heart lift a little. “Really?”
“Sure. I think it would be good for both of you. It would help him practice his reading and writing. He’s just learning, but we could read your letters out loud to him. And you two could exchange photos of what you are doing in your lives.”
“I’d like that,” Amber replied, imagining finding letters from him in her mailbox.
“We were thinking maybe once a month would be good.”
“Okay,” she agreed.
“Before you leave, it’s important that you sit down and really clarify your relationship and what you told him. Let’s make sure he understands that he belongs here with us, and you didn’t mean for him to think he’s going to be moving in with you.”
Amber felt herself blush. “Yeah. Maybe you can help me explain it to him.”
Michelle nodded. “Good plan.” She reached out and squeezed Amber’s hand. “And Amber, I just want you to know how proud I am of your plan to become a teacher. I hope it works out for you.”
“Thanks. Me, too,” she replied, feeling like a schoolgirl again.
They cleared their breakfast plates and went to look for Caleb. He was playing with his remote control car on the back patio. “Hey there, little man,” Michelle said.
“Hi, Mom!” he replied with a grin, adding, “Watch out!” to Amber as the shiny red car swerved to miss her foot.
Amber pulled her foot away and gave a mock scream. “You’re a pretty wild driver,” she said as she smiled at him.
“Let’s sit down,” Michelle said, gesturing toward the picnic table.
“Okay,” he replied, guiding the car to the edge of the patio and parking it.
As they sat down, Amber suddenly felt nervous. How do I say this? I want him to know that I really care and would love to have him live with me. But I know that’ll never work right now. She cleared her throat and began. “So, remember our little talk when we were playing ball the other day?”
He looked at her and then at Michelle like he wasn’t sure what to say.
“It’s okay. Your mom knows what we talked about,” Amber reassured him.
Looking relieved, he replied, “Yeah. I remember.”
“Well, I think you might have misunderstood what I was telling you,” she said.
He bit his lip as he stared at her.
“I know I said you could come live with me anytime, but I was just meaning if you ever needed a place to go if something happened to your parents.”
“Like what?” he asked.
She turned to Michelle, hoping for some assistance.
“Amber was just thinking about what happened to Chad, honey. And she didn’t want you to ever worry about being alone. But nothing’s going to happen to us,” she added firmly. “So you don’t need to worry about it. Okay?”
He nodded solemnly. “So I’m not going to live with you?” he asked Amber.
“No. You get to stay here with your mom and dad and Madison,” she replied, noticing the relieved expression on his face.
“Okay. Can I go play now?” he asked.
“There’s just one more thing we wanted to talk to you about,” Michelle said. “Daddy and Amber and I were thinking it might be fun for you and Amber to write letters to each other after she gets back to Arizona. We can help you write what you want to say in your letters and help you read the ones she sends to you.”
“And we could send each other pictures,” Amber added.
“Okay. Cool.”
“So you’d like to do that?” Michelle asked.
“Sure. We could be pen pals,” he replied casually.
“Where did you hear that term before?” Michelle asked, a surprised look on her face.
“Our Sunday School teacher said we could be pen pals with the missionary’s kids in Africa.”
“Really? You didn’t tell me that.”
“Oh. I forgot I guess.”
Michelle ruffled his hair, and he playfully pulled away. She is so good with him, Amber thought as she watched them interact. “So we’ll be pen pals,” she said to Caleb.
“Deal,” he replied with a grin, holding his hand up to give her a high five before trotting off to play with his car again.
After they returned to the kitchen for some coffee, Michelle asked Amber about her conversation with Ben the night before.
“He is such a great guy,” Amber said. “I’m really glad he came over to talk to me.”
“Yeah, we think he’s pretty special,” Michelle replied. “He’s got a good heart and a lot of wisdom.”
She nodded. “Even though I know it’s going to be really hard without Chad,” she began, hearing her voice begin to tremble as her heart constricted in pain, “at least I know God is going to help me through it now.”
Michelle took her hand. “If you ever need someone to talk to, I hope you’ll call.”
“I will. Thanks.” She looked at the blurry image of her teacher through the tears that had pooled in her eyes. “And thanks for being such a good mom to Caleb,” she added. Then she pulled her hand away to brush off a tear that had escaped.
“It’s okay to cry, Amber. Sometimes the tears can really help you heal.”
She nodded, turning away as more tears fell. “I think I’ll go start packing,” she said as she pushed herself to her feet, careful not to make eye contact with the one person who could see into her heart like no other.
Grant and Stacy Gamble pulled into the Barons’ driveway around 2:00 that afternoon. Stacy flipped down the mirror on the visor and checked her appearance, her stomach churning. Although she looked a little road weary, Grant reassured her she was fine. “Let’s go get our daughter,” he said.
“I still can’t believe Chad is gone,” she said as they got out of the car.
Grant clicked the lock on the key fob and took her hand.
“I wonder what Caleb looks like,” she added. “Doesn’t it seem weird that we have a six-year-old grandson?”
“I honestly don’t think of him as our grandson, Stace. He belongs to their family, not ours,” he added as he gestured toward the house.
“Yeah. You’re right.”
They approached the door and rang the bell, Stacy nervously running her free hand through her hair. “Are you sure I look okay?”
“You look fine.”
The door swung open, and a girl, who looked to be about twelve or thirteen stood there. “Mom! They’re here,” she called back over her shoulder. Turning to them, she smiled. “Hi. I’m Madison. You’re Amber’s parents, right?”
Grant reached out his hand as he nodded. “Grant Gamble. And this is Amber’s mom, Stacy.”
Madison shook his hand and invited them in. “They’ll be right down,” she said, then added, “I’ll go up and make sure they heard me.” She left them alone in the entryway as she headed up the stairs.
Stacy had memories of Michelle Baron when she’d been Amber’s teacher and during the hospital visits after Caleb had been born, but she’d never been to her house before. It seemed a little surreal to be coming into the home of this woman who had been such a godsend to their daughter and who was now the mother of their grandson.
Her immediate impression was favorable. The house felt homey and welcoming. Tidy but not stiff. A sign over the front window caught her eye. Faith ~ Family ~ Friends.
Before she could point it out to her husband, Amber came down the stairs, her duffle bag slung over her shoulders, followed by Michelle. Stacy reached for her daughter. “Hi, baby,” she murmured into Amber’s hair as they embraced. Then Amber turned and gave her father a quick hug, warming Stacy’s heart as she thought about the restoration in their relationship.
“It’s good to see you, Stacy,” Michelle said.
“Thanks. You, too,” she replied. “I don’t think you’ve met Amber’s father,” she added, gesturing to her husband.
Michelle extended her hand, and Grant grasped it. “Grant,” he said, adding, “You’ve got a nice home here.”
“Thank you. Please, come in and have a seat. Can I get you something to drink? A soda or a cup of coffee?”
“Coffee sounds great,” he replied.
Then she glanced at Stacy. “How about you?”
“Yeah. Coffee would be wonderful,” she said.