Smiling Proud Wanderer Vol 04

by Jin Yong

  There were many people from inside the courtyard shouting loudly: "Really strange! Damn it, who did this?" "When did this happen? How come the gods didn't know, the ghosts didn't feel it; the hands and feet are really agile!" "These people's martial art aren't bad, how come they could be played by other people without uttering a word?"

  Linghu Chong knew something strange had taken place. He stayed by the side entrance and looked inside. The courtyard and the walkways were full of people looking at the branches of a Gongsun tree. Linghu Chong lifted his head up to take a look and he also felt it very strange that his heart was also calling out like the other people in the courtyard. High on top of the tree were eight people hanging down. They were Qiu Songnian, Madam Zhang, Monk Xibao, Priest Yuling, and their other group members making seven of them, while the other person was ‘Slippery and Hard to Grip’ You Xun. The eight of them had apparently had their acupoints sealed and all of their limbs tied up, and they had been hung up there swinging to and fro. They were more than ten feet above the ground. Besides following the blowing of the wind, they could not move at all. All eight of them had embarrassed expressions, which were rarely seen. Two black snakes were seen slithering around their bodies, which were actually the 'Double-Snake Ruthless Beggar' Yan Sanxing's precious weapons. It was ordinary for these two snakes to be slithering about Yan Sanxing's body, but when they were slithering about the other seven people's bodies, expressions of fear and loathing was added to the angry and ashamed appearances of these people.

  Someone from the crowd leapt up. He was Night Cat 'Nothing He Can't Do' Ji Wushi. His hand was holding a dagger, and he quickly cut the bindings of 'Tung Cypress Whiz Duo'. These two people then fell from mid air and a short and stout Old Man extended his hand to stop them and put them on the ground. In just a brief moment, all eight of them had been helped down by Ji Wushi and each person had had their acupoints unsealed. Once Qiu Songnian was freed, he promptly hurled some abuses. He then saw the crowd of people were wide eyed looking at him; some were smiling, some were amazed, some were saying, "Has!", some were saying, "Plot!", some were saying, "Careful!", and some were saying, "Life!". Madam Zhang took a glance and saw there was one word written on each of Qiu Songnian's and the other six people's foreheads. The words said: 'Plot Has Been Defeated, Be Careful Worthless Life!’

  The other people were alarmed and one by one they repeated, "Plot Has Been Defeated, Be Careful Worthless Life!"

  Monk Xibao angrily shouted, "What plot has been defeated, your granny! Which worthless life needs to be careful?" While Priest Yuling extended his hand, spat on it, and then rubbed his forehead trying to wipe away the word.

  Zhu Qianqiu said, "Brother You, how did the eight of you get captured? Can you tell us?"

  You Xun smiled slightly and said, "I'm ashamed to say it, but I was sleeping peacefully last night, and didn't know how it happened. But someone sealed my acupoints and hung me from the top of the tree. That thief was most likely using the 'Five Confusion Poison' to knock us out. Otherwise, how can these brothers' skills be of no use and fell into someone's plot? How can someone so wise and brave like Priest Yuling and Madam Zhang fall into this?"

  Madam Zhang snorted and said, "That must be it." She didn't want to linger and talk too much so she hastily went in to wash her face. Priest Yuling and the others also followed her in.

  The crowd discussed about this and many of them were clicking their tongues feeling the incident was really strange. They all said, "You Xun's words aren't true."

  Some people said, "There are dozens of people sleeping inside the hall. If they used confusion poison, then dozens of us would get it. How come only a few of them got it?"

  Many people thought of the word 'Plot' from the phrase 'Plot Has Been Defeated', they didn't know what kind of plot it was pointing at so they came up with many guesses and couldn't decide which one was right. Someone said, "Which master hung these eight people on that tall tree?"

  Someone laughingly answered, "Luckily the Peach Valley Six Weirdos aren't here today, otherwise it'll be so noisy here."

  Another person replied, "How do you know it wasn't the Peach Valley Six Fairies who did this? Those six brothers are very eccentric. Most likely it was them who did this."

  Zu Qianqiu shook his head. "No, no, it can't be."

  One of the earlier person said, "Brother Zu, how do you know?"

  Zu Qianqiu laughed. "Even though the Peach Valley Six Fairies' martial arts are high, their knowledge is very limited. I can guarantee you that they wouldn't even be able to write that word 'Plot'."

  The crowd burst into laughter thinking what Zu Qianqiu said was right. Everyone was discussing this interesting matter and no one paid attention towards Linghu Chong who was disguised as a servant and was wearing a stupid expression. Linghu Chong thought in his heart, "What were these eight people trying to plot? It must be something harmful towards my Heng-Shan School."

  After noon, on the same day, some people outside the courtyard shouted, "Weird, weird! Everyone, come have a look!" The crowd rushed out, while Linghu Chong slowly followed behind them. On the right side of the Other Courtyard there were tens of people surrounding something. The crowd quickly sprinted to go there. Linghu Chong walked near and heard some people discussing about this. There were more than ten people who were sitting on the ground facing the cliff. It was apparent their acupoints had been sealed and they were unable to move. There were eight words written on the wall of the mountain and they were the same words as before, 'Plot Has Been Defeated, Be Careful Worthless Life'.

  Some people turned those people sitting on the ground around and they saw the Bear Duo of the Northern Desert were amongst them. Ji Wushi walked up to the Bear Duo of the Northern Desert and released their mute acupoints, but not the other sealed acupoints leaving them unable to move. Ji Wushi said, "There's something I don't understand here that I'd like to ask you about. I'd like to ask the two of you what kind of secret plan are you involved in? Everyone here would like to know."

  "Right, right! What plot? Tell us about it," the crowd demanded.

  Black Bear scolded, "Damn their eighteen ancestors. What plot? Plot their turtle sons."

  "Who sealed your acupoints? Can you tell us about it?" Zu Qianqiu queried.

  White Bear said, "It's good if I know. I was just walking peacefully around the mountain when my back suddenly felt numb, ambushed by that bastard. If it's a hero then he would've fought me with real sabre, real spear. Sneaking an attack behind me, what kind of person is that?"

  Zu Qianqiu said, "That's fine if the two of you don't want to say it. This matter is already known to the others but I see that there's nothing we can do about it. But I think you need to be really careful."

  Someone said in a loud voice, "Brother Zu, they're not willing to disclose it, then let them stay here for three days and three nights."

  Another person said, "Right, he who tied the bell on the tiger's neck is the only one to untie it*. If you release them, that master will definitely put the blame on you, seal your acupoints, and hang you from a tree. It certainly won't be fun."

  (*The meaning of this saying is: He who caused the dispute is the only one to resolve it.)

  Ji Wushi said, "What you said isn't wrong. Brothers, I'm not sitting here on the side being a spectator, I'm actually a little bit afraid."

  Black Bear and White Bear looked at each other, and they were both furious. But it was pointless to start scolding, and they also didn't dare to publicly scold Ji Wushi's ancestor. Otherwise, with them still being unable to move, they wouldn't be able to fight back if the opponent wanted to be rude towards them.

  Ji Wushi laughed while cupping his hands to the crowd continuously. "Everyone, please." Then he turned his body around to walk away. The people crowding around them pointed and laughed, said a few words and they also slowly walked away. Linghu Chong turned around and walked slowly. When he reached the outside of the Other Courtyard, he heard people clamouring and giggling inside. He r
aised his head and saw two people had been hung on the Gongsun tree again. One of them was Monk Cannot Have No Commandment and the other one was Monk No Commandment.

  Linghu Chong was greatly amazed as he thought, "Great Master No Commandment is little martial sister Yilin's father, while Tian Boguang is little martial sister's disciple. The two of them would never give Heng-Shan School any trouble. If Heng-Shan School has any problem, they would exert themselves to help. Why are they being hung on the tree?" He was really sure he knew what was going on before, but suddenly his whole idea had been turned upside down. He thought of one thing, "Great Master No Commandment is innocent like a child, he doesn't have any enmity with anyone. Why would anyone hang him from the tree? Someone must be playing a joke with him. No one here is strong enough to capture Great Master No Commandment, this must be Peach Valley Six Fairies' doing." But what Zu Qianqiu said before was very reasonable, the Peach Valley Six Fairies couldn't have written the word 'Plot'. He entered the courtyard slowly as his mind was occupied with doubts. As he entered, he saw there was a piece of yellow paper stuck to each of Monk No Commandment's and Tian Boguang's bodies. There were words written on them.

  The words written on Monk No Commandment's paper were: 'World's number one heartless, perverted and lascivious man.' While the words written on Tian Boguang's paper were: 'World's number one in unseemly behaviour, a person who does everything half heartedly.'

  When Linghu Chong read this for the first time, he immediately thought, "These two papers are placed on the wrong persons. How come Monk No Commandment is 'a perverted and lascivious man'? This 'perverted and lascivious' words, they must surely belong to Tian Boguang. While the words 'unseemly behaviour', they must surely belong to Monk No Commandment. He's not sworn off from killing, eating meat, and he even dared to take a nun as his wife when he's a monk. These are unseemly behaviour. But this 'half heartedly' comment, where did it come from?"

  But these two papers were stuck nicely to each of their necks, and it didn't look like someone had hastily stuck them wrongly. The crowd was pointing, laughing, and discussing what was going on. Many people also said, "Tian Boguang is perverted, this is very well known in the world. How can this big monk be more perverted than he is?"

  Ji Wushi and Zu Qianqiu consulted each other quietly, and both of them sensed something was fishy. They knew Monk No Commandment and Linghu Chong were very good towards each other and they must help these two people down first before discussing it further. Ji Wushi quickly leapt up the tree and cut of the ropes binding their hands and feet and released their sealed acupoints. No Commandment and Tian Boguang were both looking very dejected, unlike Qiu Songnian and Bear Duo of the Northern Desert who started hurling abuses as soon as they were released.

  Ji Wushi quietly asked, "Great Master, how did you also end up like that?" But Monk No Commandment just shook his head and slowly took off the piece of paper stuck to him. He stared at the words written on it for a long time and all of a sudden, he cried.

  This change was totally out of everyone's expectation. The crowd abruptly turned deathly quiet and all of them were stupefied as they gaped at him. Both of his fists were clenched as they kept on hammering his own chest; he was becoming even sadder as he cried. Tian Boguang tried to comfort him, "Grand martial master, you don't need to be sad. We lost to someone's plot, but when we find this person, we'll break his corpse into thousands of pieces..." He had not finished yet when Monk No Commandment turned around and gave him a hard slap. The palm hit Tian Boguang, forcing him to back away for more than ten feet. He staggered and had nearly fallen down. Half of his cheek had now started to become swollen.

  Monk No Commandment scolded, "Smelly bastard! We were hung up here because we deserved it. You... You... You're very daring. Wanting to kill other people!"

  Tian Boguang was confused when he heard Grand Martial Master said this. The person who had captured them must be someone with an impressive background that even Grand Martial Master did not dare to offend him. So all Tian Boguang could do was agree to his Grand Martial Master. Monk No Commandment stared dumbly, and started to cry and beat on his chest again. Suddenly, he struck out again with his palm towards Tian Boguang. Tian Boguang was really fast so he quickly evaded the strike as he called out, "Grand Martial Master!"

  Monk No Commandment did not chase after him even though his hit had missed. He took his hand back and with a slap, he hit a stone bench inside the courtyard, causing the crumbling stones to fly out everywhere. His left palm and his right palm struck out continuously as he started to cry again. More and more force was used with each strike. After more than ten strikes, both of his palms were covered with blood and the top of the stone bench had also crumbled to gravel. Then with a thunderous crack, the stone bench was split asunder into four pieces. The crowd was amazed and none of them dared to utter a single word. Every one of them was afraid to draw his anger onto them. Besides, whose head was stronger than that of the stone bench if Monk No Commandment were to turn to them?

  Zu Qianqiu, Old Man, and Ji Wushi looked at each other and none of them knew what was happening. Tian Boguang saw something was amiss so he said, "Everyone, please look after Grand Martial Master. I'll go look for Master."

  Linghu Chong pondered, "Even though I'm already disguised, little martial sister Yilin is very careful, I should be careful not to let her discover my disguise."

  He had disguised himself before as a general and a farmer, but both had been male. This time around, he had disguised himself as a woman and it was actually very uncomfortable. He was not feeling very confident in the disguise and he was afraid his disguise would be revealed. So he quickly took himself inside the firewood house at the back garden, and thought, "The acupoints of the Bear Duo of the Northern Desert and the others are still being sealed. Ji Wushi and Zu Qianqiu must be wanting to eavesdrop on what they'll be talking about at night. I should go to sleep now and wake up sometime at night to listen to what they're talking about." Linghu Chong drifted into sleep hearing Monk No Commandment's wailing. He was amazed at this but also found it funny.

  When he woke up, the sky was already dark, and he went to the kitchen to look for some cold rice and tea to eat. After a long time, he heard no sound of anyone around. Thereupon, he slowly strolled around to the back of the mountain where the Bear Duo of the Northern Desert and the other people were. Linghu Chong crouched inside the underbrush far away and strained his ears to listen. Soon, he heard the breathing of people hiding in the underbrush all around him. There were at least around twenty people concealed in the underbrush. Linghu Chong found this hilarious. "Ji Wushi and the others must be wanting to eavesdrop as well. They've thought of the same thing. I guess there are many smart people here." He also thought, "Ji Wushi is good. He unsealed the mute acupoints of those two cannibals of the Bear Duo of the Northern Desert, but he didn't unseal the other people's mute acupoints. Otherwise, once the Bear Duo of the Northern Desert open their mouths, they'll be told to shut up by their more competent comrades."

  Linghu Chong then heard White Bear swearing continuously, "Your granny, so many mosquitoes on this mountain side. They want to suck my blood dry before they're happy. I curse the eighteen generations of your mosquitoes' ancestors."

  Black Bear laughed. "The mosquitoes are stinging you only, but not me. I wonder what the reason is."

  White Bear cussed, "Your blood is smelly so the mosquitoes don't want to eat it."

  Black Bear laughingly replied, "I'd rather have smelly blood instead of hundreds of mosquitoes stinging me."

  White Bear replied with curses. After hurling abuses for a while, White Bear said, "After my acupoints are released, the first thing I'll do is to look for Night Cat and settle our business. I'll seal that bastard's acupoints and eat the flesh from his thigh bite by bite."

  Black Bear laughingly replied, "But I'd rather eat those nuns. Their skins are so white and their meat would be more tender."

  White Bear said, "Mr. Yue ordered us to take those
nuns to Mount Huashan, not to eat them."

  Black Bear laughingly said, "There are hundreds of nuns here, Mr. Yue wouldn't know if we eat three or four of them."

  Linghu Chong was greatly startled. "Master ordered them? Why did he ask them to take the Heng-Shan School's disciples to Mount Huashan? This 'Plot' must've have been this thing. But how did they get my master's order?"

  Suddenly, White Bear loudly shouted, "Bastards!"

  Black Bear indignantly said, "If you don't want to eat nuns then don't eat. Why do you have to scold me for?"

  "I'm scolding these mosquitoes, not you," White Bear said.

  Linghu Chong's mind was full of thoughts when he suddenly heard footsteps from the underbrush behind him. The footsteps slowly came near him. Linghu Chong thought, "This person had better not step on me." That person was walking straight at him and stopped right behind him before crouching down and lightly pulling on his sleeve. Linghu Chong was started and thought, "Who's this? Did he recognise me?" Then he turned his head around. Under the blurry moonlight, he saw a beautiful round face. It was Yilin. He was startled and happy at the same time, he thought, "So my disguise has been discovered by her. Of course I wouldn't look like a woman even if I'm disguised in one."

  Yilin inclined her head to a side with her little mouth pouting, and she slowly stood up. She was still pulling on his sleeve showing that she wanted to talk to him someplace away from there. Linghu Chong followed behind her as she went towards the west. The two of them didn't say a single word as they walked. Yilin led them along a narrow strip of mountain road away from the Tong Yuan Valley. She suddenly said, "You don't listen to what other people said and come up to this troubling place again. That's very dangerous." These few words she said didn't seem to be directed to him, but it seemed like she was talking to herself.