Brunettes Strike Back
Page 20
“Yeah. We can’t cheer and play,” Mindy said.
“No. ’Cause that would be, like, hard,” Bethany said in a Valley girl voice.
We ignored her. Sometimes that’s the only way we can carry out a normal conversation with Bethany around. I loved the girl, but she had this whole “I don’t know when to quit” problem. Especially around Mindy. The two of them had been getting along lately for my benefit, I think, but sometimes Bethany just could not stop herself from picking on Mindy, her polar opposite. Luckily Mindy had proven more than capable of letting the jabs glance off her shoulders.
“Who do you think’s gonna try out?” Mindy asked me.
“I don’t know. But I hope some of the girls from last time come back,” I said. “A few of them were pretty good.”
“Can we please talk about something else?” Bethany interjected. “Anything else other than cheerleading?”
“Yeah! Like that girl Shira,” Mindy said. “She could definitely make it.”
“And I’ll need a new base with you gone,” I said. “She would be great.”
“You guys,” Bethany said, desperate.
“I almost feel bad for whoever makes it, though,” Mindy said. “I mean, the whole Tara Timothy breaking-you-in process?”
We both shuddered. That had not been fun. For anyone.
“I know! I know! I’ll try out!” Bethany announced, jumping in front of us and throwing her arms up. Actually, girl had a pretty solid high V going. “I can be a base! Here! I’ll throw you right now!”
And something told me she would do it too.
“Bethany—”
Mindy and I both stopped in our tracks. At the exact same moment we had seen a colorful flyer on the wall behind Bethany. A flyer that took the breath right out of me.
“Ha! I knew that would get your attention!” Bethany cheered, taking the lollipop out of her mouth and pointing at us with it. “Like I would ever join the lemming brigade. Ha!”
Mindy and I looked at each other, then looked at the flyer again. Finally Bethany seemed to realize that our eyes were not on her.
“What?” she said, and turned around. I watched the glee slowly register on her face as she read. “Guys? They’re letting guys try out for cheerleading? Oh, I love this school!” Her ensuing laughing fit could have woken the dead.
“This is very not good,” Mindy said.
The sign read, “Tryouts for the basketball cheerleading squad this Friday. All interested girls and BOYS are invited to try out! Informational meeting today at 3:00 P.M. Lecture Hall #210.”
Talk about a holiday surprise. Had Coach Holmes already ODed on eggnog?
“Why didn’t Coach warn us about this?” I wondered.
“This is going to change everything,” Mindy said.
I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or barf. “It . . . could be fun . . . ,” I attempted. After all, with guys on the squad we could do all kinds of new stunts. Huge pyramids, jaw-dropping tosses. It might be exactly what we needed to take our game up a notch.
“Oh, come on, guys! Be serious,” Bethany said. “No male in this school is ever going to show up for that meeting.”
“What makes you so sure?” I asked.
“These gutless wonders?” Bethany said, spreading her arms wide as if to encompass the whole school. “Please. If any of the guys in this place showed even one iota of originality, there would be mass hysteria. We’re talking rain of toads. Cats with nine tails. Babies born with inside-out eyeballs. The whole nine.”
“Nice imagery,” I said.
“Trust me. You have nothing to worry about.”
Down the hall there was a burst of laughter. Bethany’s older brother Bobby—whom I fondly called Lumberjack Bob because of his massive size and impressively dark stubble—was strutting around in a little circle, wagging his hips and flailing his arms comically while chanting “SDH! SDH!” in a high-pitched voice. His friends were practically rolling on the floor with laughter. Like this was such an inspired and original performance.
Yeah. A guy trying out for the cheerleading squad would pretty much be signing himself up for endless public mockery. That much was clear.
“I rest my case,” Bethany said. “Your precious squad is gonna be fine.”