Belong

by C. R. Jane

  A lifetime of being nothing. That's what eighteen meant for me.

  I once read a book about the sirens. I found it in the school library, and although I'm sure that most of it wasn't true, one thing did stand out to me.

  Sirens once had control. The waves, the depths of the sea, the weather...all of it was ours.

  And then one day, all that power disappeared.

  My thoughts dissipated as my chest started to burn. I rubbed it absentmindedly, thinking maybe I had some indigestion from all that lettuce my mother had forced me to eat for dinner.

  The burning began to spread, however, until I felt like I was on fire. Looking down at my skin in panic, I half expected it to look burnt to a crisp.

  The pain grew so intense that I opened my mouth to scream, but nothing came out. It was like I was being reborn at that moment, changed from the inside out.

  I laid there and felt like I was dying as the burning somehow intensified until my world was narrowed to just a pinprick in space. No wonder none of the girls I knew had wanted to talk about this. I couldn't imagine a greater pain than this. I guess this explained how my mama could do unmedicated childbirth like it was nothing.

  Just when I thought I couldn't take a second more, and the burning became so great that I believed I would become nothing but embers at any time, the burning disappeared as quickly as it had begun. It left me a throbbing, shaking mess from the adrenaline still coursing through my body.

  Tears were streaming down my face. I had been in so much pain that I didn't even realize that I was crying.

  Lifting my hand to brush the tears off my face, I gasped in surprise. The skin on my hand almost seemed to be glowing...it was like there was a backlight reflecting off my hand. I started examining my entire body and saw that the strange light had taken over every inch of my skin. There were other changes as well.

  I was more…

  That was the best way to describe it. My skin was smoother, my dark hair was thicker and longer, my lips were fuller...everything about my looks was just...more.

  What was even stranger than the way my skin glowed and what also seemed to have improved, was the fact that I felt stronger. Like there was a power inside of me that was just waiting to come out and play.

  And I didn't even have to wonder what it was. I just knew. It hummed through my mind.

  I opened my mouth, and it was just instinct, this song that I was all of a sudden singing. A song as old as time itself. A song of my people.

  It flowed from me, weaving its spell on everything around me. Storm clouds were gathering in the distance outside the window I now stood in front of. Wind was picking up from the east and racing towards me. All of nature was bending to my will.

  I felt powerful. I felt magical. I felt like who I was supposed to be.

  I didn't know how I could live without this feeling ever again.

  I woke up in a daze. At first, I didn't realize where I was. The last thing I remembered was standing in the pouring rain in my manor's backyard as the wind raced around me.

  Somehow, I ended up back in my room on the floor.

  And somehow, I fell asleep.

  Staring at the clock, I wanted to cry. Julian would be here any minute. And then everything would be gone.

  A knock sounded on my door just then, and a hiccupping sob burst out of my mouth.

  The door opened a second later, and Mama stood there, perfectly primped and coiffed as ever. She was Julian’s little pet.

  And I hated her for it.

  I hated her acceptance of our life. I hated that she’d paraded me in front of Julian since I was a little girl, and that she ignored the heated glances he gave me. She ignored the promise in his eyes for what was to come for me.

  She was a selfish, terrible excuse for a woman. If only her outside appearance matched the ugliness inside of her.

  She looked triumphant as she stared at me from the doorway.

  Rosalind Alexander was a beautiful woman. And beautiful was probably an understatement. She was stunning. The kind of being who garnered stares no matter where she was or who she was talking to.

  She was the darling of the vampires' courtesans, and very proud of that fact. Icy blonde hair, blue eyes that could and did charm any man. She was perfect, perfectly evil.

  "What are you doing on the floor?" she asked disdainfully.

  As much as I wanted to tell her to go fuck herself, I refrained.

  “Julian will be here soon. Get changed," she ordered, looking at my pajamas that consisted of an old rock concert tee and a pair of cheerleading shorts like they were disease-ridden.

  "Yes ma'am," I replied, trying my best to sound respectful. Because she controlled my future right now. I was hopeful that at the very least, she would ease me into the business rather than throwing me to the wolves all at once.

  When I didn’t move quick enough for her liking, she marched over to me and slapped me on the side of my head. “Get up,” she barked before striding away, confident that her orders would be obeyed. She’d specifically hit me on the side of my head rather than my face so that there wouldn’t be any visible blemishes. Julian wouldn’t like that, and all my mama cared about was him.

  Wasn’t it a pity for her that all she wanted in life was him and all he wanted was me?

  I shivered at the thought.

  I went through the motions of getting ready. There was a certain order to getting ready that I'd been taught practically before I could walk.

  Wash my face, moisturize my face, apply lotion all over my body. Apply makeup. Get dressed. Do my hair. Apply perfume in certain places.

  I didn't even have to think about it.

  Thirty minutes later, I stood there in front of my mirror, the perfect daughter once again. There were no band tees worn during the day. Just like there would be no birthday cake today. It was just how things were.

  I walked over to the window, trying to delay the inevitable.

  I could still feel the power coursing through me. So much power that I could leave right now if I wanted to and everything would bow to me.

  Except for the vampires. They would eventually find me. And then they would destroy me. Just as they had any siren who dared to step out of line in the past.

  We didn't talk about it, but my great-grandmother had been one of those killed for daring to rebel. It was my family's greatest shame, one my mother and grandmother spent their whole lives rectifying. It was only me that secretly thought about her. Thought about her and wanted to be like her.

  Without the whole dying part though obviously.

  I wasn't sure how the vampires did it. But it was a principle in the paranormal world that everything had something that was bigger and badder than them. And although the sirens were much more powerful than many of the paranormal creatures out there, the simplest explanation was that the vampire was the siren's shark. Ten out of ten times, the shark would beat the fish. And ten out of ten times, the vampire crushed the sirens.

  Another knock sounded on the door, and I wanted to cry. I opened my window and quickly began to gather storm clouds, the process instinctive. As the perfectly sunny day suddenly became dark and cloudy, and rain began to fall, I savored the mist coming in through the window, even though it was ruining my hair. I would take my punishment for not looking perfect, just so I could feel it one last time.

  The knock beat on the door again, this time louder and more urgent.

  "Coming," I called out sharply, even knowing that the servant on the other side of the door was just doing their job and had no role in this.

  I took one last inhale, memorizing the way I felt at this moment, and then I closed the window and walked to the door, not bothering to fix my appearance one bit.

  Betsy, one of our maids, was waiting for me outside the door. She was usually one of my favorite servants, always full of gossip and intrigue to tell me. But today I couldn't even muster up a smile for her.

  "Happy Birthday, miss," she said softly, and I
nodded at her in acknowledgment, proud of myself for managing to keep my lip from quivering.

  She examined me as we walked, and I knew she was noting how different I looked at the moment. I knew most of the changes would disappear after Julian did whatever he was going to do. The glow in my skin would definitely go. But there were some things that would stay, like my longer hair and eyelashes and my larger lips. Traits I wasn't grateful for in the least bit. I had enough time trying to keep beings away from me, I didn't need even more things enticing them.

  Betsy didn't understand, but the reason she liked me so much, the reason why she had no problem working hard for us around the house day after day for practically nothing wasn't because of my naturally winsome personality. No, instead it was because all sirens were born with something that attracted everyone around them. Some sirens were more powerful than others, but we all held that same basic trait. Men...and women...happened to fall in love with us, wanted to be our friend, wanted to be near us, all the time. It wasn't something that could be taken away. It was just intrinsic to our very nature. Of course, that whole shark thing came into play with that ability as well, and the vampires didn't have a problem falling in love with us. Instead, they used our ability to get what they wanted from other species, and they used our above-average looks to give themselves pleasure.

  The Goddess Mother up in the heavens must have had a cruel sense of humor.

  "You look nice, miss," Betsy commented softly and it was all I could do not to roll my eyes. I controlled myself, even though the looks of pity and lust she was throwing my way made me want to punch her in her friendly face.

  We finally made it into the "parlor" as Mama called it, which really was just a glorified term for living room.

  And there he was.

  Julian Morgenstern in all of his glory.

  And he really was a glorious sight. The perfect predator to drag in his prey. His eyes immediately met mine as I entered the room, and his mouth curled up into a possessive smile.

  Although I knew Julian was at least a few thousand years old, he would appear to any human to be in his mid-30s. He had blonde hair that was almost silver looking, it was so light. His hair was offset by his striking dark brown eyes, so dark that they almost appeared black if you weren't in good lighting. He was tall, with perfectly carved muscles that, thanks to his vampire heritage, would always be there...even if he decided to eat bonbons on the couch for the rest of his life. He had an aristocratic nose and a cruel mouth, and everything about him made me want to flee his presence.

  Women of all species fell all over themselves to be with him, but for reasons unknown to me, all Julian Morgenstern wanted was me.

  His eyes greedily took me in, not missing a detail. He didn’t seem perturbed at all by the fact that my hair was wet from the storm I’d created. If anything, he looked excited about it.

  “She’s strong, Rosalind,” he commented, beginning to walk a slow circle around me as he examined me from all angles. “Much stronger than I thought. It’s almost a shame…”

  I stiffened, hoping against all odds that he was actually thinking about letting me keep my power.

  It was a stupid hope though. Julian suddenly called for his servant, Frederick, to bring him something.

  I thought about getting on my knees to beg, or calling for a storm, or running like I dreamed about earlier. But I did none of that. I just stood there like my feet had turned into stone.

  Frederick walked over to him and handed him an object covered in a silky red cloth. Julian carefully pulled off the cloth, revealing what looked like some kind of glass ball.

  “Look familiar, Rosalind?” Julian commented when he noticed how Mama’s eyes were locked onto the ball.

  I glanced at her, confused. But I didn’t stay confused long.

  Julian walked towards me until he was standing uncomfortably close to me. He stared down at me feverishly for a moment.

  What happened next would live in my dreams for a very long time. Julian opened his mouth, so wide that his jaw looked like it had become dislocated. I stared into the black hole of his mouth, terrified as he began to make a strange sucking sound.

  As soon as the sound began, I experienced a strange pulling sensation. As if my life source was being siphoned out of me. I tried to move as a gold mist began to stream out of me, but I was locked into place. All I could do was watch horrified as the gold mist—which I recognized to be my power, based on how weak I was beginning to feel—floated into the glass orb.

  Julian’s eyes rolled backwards in pleasure.

  He had always been the baddest monster in the room...but this was on a whole other level.

  Julian took every last drop of my power.

  And when he was done, and the glass orb was pulsing with the golden light of what he had stolen from me...I felt like I had died.

  Keep reading Siren Condemned at books2read.com/sirencondemned

  About C.R. Jane

  A Texas girl living in Utah now, I'm a wife, mother, lawyer, and now author. My stories have been floating around in my head for years, and it has been a relief to finally get them down on paper. I’m a huge Dallas Cowboys fan and I primarily listen to Beyonce and Taylor Swift…don’t lie and say you don’t too.

  My love of reading started probably when I was three and with a faster than normal ability to read, I’ve devoured hundreds of thousands of books in my life. It only made sense that I would start to create my own worlds since I was always getting lost in others’. I like heroines who have to grow in order to become badasses, happy endings, and swoon-worthy, devoted, (and hot) male characters. If this sounds like you, I’m pretty sure we’ll be friends. I’m so glad to have you on my team…check out the links below for ways to hang out with me and more of my books you can read!

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  Visit my Website.

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  Other Books by C.R. Jane

  The Fated Wings Series

  First Impressions

  Forgotten Specters

  The Fallen One (a Fated Wings Novella)

  Forbidden Queens

  Frightful Beginnings (a Fated Wings Short Story)

  Faded Realms

  Faithless Dreams

  Fabled Kingdoms (2020)

  The Rock God (a Fated Wings Novella)

  The Timeless Affection Series

  Lamented Pasts

  Lost Passions

  The Pack Queen Series

  Queen of the Thieves

  Queen of the Alphas (2019)

  The Rise Again Series

  The Day After Nothing (2020)

  The Sounds of Us Contemporary Series (complete series)

  Remember Us This Way

  Remember You This Way

  Remember Me This Way

  Broken Hearts Academy Series

  Heartbreak Prince

  Academy of Souls Co-write with Mila Young (complete series)

  School of Broken Souls

  School of Broken Hearts

  School of Broken Dreams

  School of Broken Wings

  Fallen World Series Co-write with Mila Young (complete series)

  Bound

  Broken

  Betrayed

  Belong

  Thief of Hearts Co-write with Mila Young

  Siren Condemned

  Siren Sacrificed

  Stupid Boys Series Co-write with Rebecca Royce

  Stupid Boys

  Dumb Girl

  Crazy Love

  About Mila Young

  Mila Young tackles everything with the zeal and bravado of the fairytale heroes she grew up reading about. She slays monsters, real and imaginary, like there's no tomorrow. By day she rocks a keyboard as a marketing extraordinaire. At night she battles with her might pen-sword, creating
fairytale retellings, and sexy ever after tales. In her spare time, she loves pretending she's a mighty warrior, walks on the beach with her dogs, cuddling up with her cats, and devouring every fantasy tale she can get her pinkies on.

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  Other Books by Mila Young

  Gods and Monsters

  Apollo Is Mine

  Poseidon Is Mine

  Ares Is Mine

  Hades Is Mine

  Winter’s Thorn

  To Catch A Fae - FREE

  To Seduce A Fae

  To Tame A Fae

  Haven Realm Series

  Hunted (Little Red Riding Hood Retelling)

  Cursed (Beauty and the Beast Retelling)

  Entangled (Rapunzel Retelling)

  Wicked Heat Series

  Wicked Heat #1

  Wicked Heat #2

  Wicked Heat #3

  Elemental Series

  Taking Breath #1

  Taking Breath #2

  Fallen World Series Co-write with C.R. Jane

  Bound

  Broken

  Betrayed

  Broken Souls Series Co-write with C.R. Jane

  School of Broken Souls

  School of Broken Hearts

  School of Broken Dreams

  Beautiful Beasts Academy Co-write with Kim Faulks

  Manicures and Mayhem

  Diamonds and Demons

  Hexes and Hounds

  Secrets and Shadows