Joy and Tiers

by Mary Crawford

  I shrug. “Well, I figured you’d be hungry and I didn’t know exactly what you’d want. I’m really good with leftovers. So, just eat what you want and I’ll figure out the rest. I just wanted to bring some happiness back into your life. I could tell from our phone calls and texts that this was hard on you and I only got to send you one care package. Consider this one big care package, okay?”

  Tyler swallows hard. “I’m not sure that I say this enough to you. But I can’t thank you enough for the hundreds of small ways you take care of me. I want you to know I don’t really expect you to, but I appreciate the hell out of it. Stuff like this astounds me. I don’t know many people who would go through all the hassle to make homemade dog food for my dog because she’s got allergies or develop special conditioner for my horses’ manes so they don’t tangle. I notice you even take the time to iron my uniforms for me on top of everything else you got going with your business and the fight with your dad. How do you do it all? Why do you do it all?”

  “First of all, sit down and eat before this all gets cold and we’ll talk okay?” The expression on his face when I mentioned the word ‘talk’ was like a thundercloud. “Wow, I didn’t mean to scare you. Talking can mean good things too. I’m not planning to ambush you with bad news.”

  Tyler loosens the grip on his fork slightly as he admits, “Sorry for jumping to conclusions, but I don’t have the best experiences with conversations that start out with ‘We have to talk…’

  I can’t help but snort as I reply, “Come to think of it, neither do I. So, I won’t keep you in suspense and I’ll answer your question right now.”

  Tyler nods stiffly as if he’s bracing for devastating news. “I guess now is as good a time as any.”

  I’m completely confused by Tyler’s reaction to our conversation, but I figure the only way to move forward is to be honest. “I’m not sure what you’re expecting me to say, so I’m just going to go with my heart here and answer your questions. I hope it’s what you are looking for. I guess the reason I do all the things I do for you is the same reason that you were willing to loan me money without having an idea of whether you’d ever get it back. I believe in you. I believe in us. It’s really as simple as that. I want to do things to make your life easier. I can’t make your job safer, or bullets less painful. I can’t kill the terrorists or make the war go away and sadly, I can’t erase the memories of what happened or heal your scars. But, I can use my skills to make your life as happy and joyful as possible despite whatever chaos is going on in your life.”

  Tyler pales at my words as he slowly sets down his fork and slumps down in his chair. He flicks tears from the corners of his eyes and scrubs his hand over his face. As I watch his reaction, my heart sinks. For the first time in months, I wonder if I’ve completely misunderstood everything about our relationship. My heart starts to pound and I mentally calculate whether I can make it to the bathroom before I collapse into tears.

  As I’m having that mental debate with myself, Tyler reaches out and pulls me onto his knee. “Oh my God, I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you. But, I swear I’m never giving you back. I was so afraid that you were going to decide that you had had enough of the uncertainty of military life. What we just went through is just a taste of what might be coming and although I can’t imagine my life without you, I’m afraid to ask you to be part of this life. My nightmares and scars are small casualties compared to what could happen and part of me wonders if I’m just being selfish by asking you to stay.”

  This time, it’s my turn to melt in relief. “Tyler, I’m sorry to tell you this, but it’s too late. I fell in love with you a really long time ago. This has been my life for months. I pray every day whether you’re scheduled to work on a shift or not because I know that even if you’re not on the work schedule, those are your colleagues in danger and if one of them were hurt, it would be as if it happened to you. I watch breaking news with fear and trepidation now and I know a frightening amount about weapons systems I never thought I’d need to know. I follow political debates and military spouse message boards so that I know how to support you. I’ve already made the decision and I’m not un-making it.”

  Tyler looks as if I’ve kicked him in the solar plexus with one of Tara’s fancy martial arts moves. “That’s a lot,” Tyler declares bleakly. “I had no idea. At the risk of sounding completely cotton headed, I have to ask why would you put yourself through that? I don’t do nearly that much for you.”

  I’m sure the look I give him is worthy of a cartoon double take. “If I hadn’t been with you all day, I’d be asking you what you’d been drinking. I’m going to spell this out as clearly as I can. Tyler Joseph Colton, I love you. Get that? If I had to name the reasons why—we could be here all night. Let’s start with the fact that you were one of the first people that actually saw the real me. You didn’t see Heather, the joke cracking, fashion smart dress-up doll. You saw who I was at the core and still fell in love with me. Not only that, you gave me the courage to love myself. I hadn’t had the courage to do that for a really long time.”

  Tyler swallows hard, like he’s fighting the urge to stop me. But, I just hold up my hand to halt him because I am not done. He asked, So, I want him to hear all of it. For all of his complaints about me not being able to take a compliment, they don’t go down much easier for him.

  “When I could finally love myself, I could forgive myself for mistakes I made in the past.” I continue in a steady confident voice. “You gave me freedom. Freedom to be who I really am, freedom from the past, and freedom to be whoever I want to be in the future. That’s huge. You stood beside me and fought for me in a way no one else had done before. You make me feel beautiful and cherished. You believe in my dreams and you don’t tell me they’re stupid. You make me feel empowered and smart. Is that a long enough list for you or would you like me to go on?”

  Tyler clears his throat and swallows hard. “No, that’s a pretty impressive list. I’m not sure I can claim credit for all that. I can’t pinpoint the second I fell in love with you. It might have been when you tricked me into eating eight kinds of pasta or the first time you trusted me enough to get on the back of a horse or it may have even been when you yelled at me about not being immune from bullets. All I know is that from the moment you entered my life, it’s never been the same.”

  Tyler helps me to a standing position and then kneels on one knee in front of me. My heart literally stops. This is so not like I planned this moment in my head. I’m wearing jeans and an “I heart my soldier” T-shirt—not some elegant evening gown and stilettos. Ty fishes something out of his pocket as I blink away tears. “Heather, this is probably not what you think it is because I stupidly wasn’t prepared for us to have a ‘moment’ like this tonight. But, I want to give this to you so you understand that I understand where we’re at.”

  I glance down at his hand and notice in antique looking coin. When he notices my puzzled expression he hurries to explain. “This is my Saint Michael’s medal. It’s the soldier’s saint. According to family folklore, it was personally blessed by a Pope. My parents gave it to me to remind me that they were always thinking of me. It was the thing I kept closest to me until I met you. Until I can get you a more suitable ring, will you allow this to be a stand-in?”

  I am completely speechless for just a moment. “Ty, just so this isn’t open to any misinterpretation, are you asking me what I think you’re asking me?” I ask breathlessly.

  “Sorry Gidget, sometimes my heart gets ahead of my brain. Heather Lydia LaBianca, will you do me the honor of being my wife? A man I respect a great deal, gave me some wonderful advice. He reminded me that I can’t relive yesterday and I can’t shape tomorrow. Today is the only day that I can live and today I choose to live and choose to accept the love you’ve given me and I hope you choose to accept the love I give you for as many days as we have left together.”

  “Tyler Joseph Colton, I would love to be your wife. I knew from the moment I la
id eyes on you, falling for you was going to be a dangerous endeavor. But, we can be brave together. I would much rather take the risk of loving you and losing you than face the choice of never having you in my life at all.” I pull Tyler to his feet and practically launch myself into his arms as I rain kisses all over his face.

  Suddenly, a funny a thought occurs to me. “You weren’t planning to ask my dad’s permission were you?”

  A dark look crosses Ty’s face. “Under ordinary circumstances, I might extend the man the courtesy, just for tradition’s sake. But, in this case, I’m not going to give him one more reason to even almost view you like his property. He doesn’t even deserve the right to breathe the same air as you as far as I’m concerned.”

  I smother a giggle. “Oh good! I thought maybe you were going to try to talk some sense into him or something. I’d much rather have Denny walk me down the aisle anyway. The only ones I don’t know about are my brother and sister. I think I’m still cool with Madison but I really don’t know about Carlton. He could fall either way on the family divide.”

  “You know who else is going to think this is pretty hysterical?” Ty asks smirking at me. “I probably shouldn’t have given Jeff so much lip about his ‘almost’ engagement to Kiera since we did exactly the same thing. Jeff’s probably going to hatch a plan with Denny to beat their previous wedding planning record as soon as they hear about us. How fast do you want to get married?”

  That question stops me in my tracks. I’ve always envisioned having months and months to plan every last detail of my wedding from the bridal shower to the reception with painstaking detail. But, then again I never envisioned a wedding without my grandma there and I always figured my parents would eventually figure me out. My eyes travel back to my wedding consulting corner. There is so much to consider. How many people should we have at the wedding? I haven’t even met my future in-laws yet. As I try to consider the possibilities, the mural catches my eye. “Oh my gosh! Tyler, we can’t get married before Tara and Aidan. It was their turn first, it would be rude to steal their thunder. This is going to be complicated.”

  Tyler wiggles his eyebrows suggestively at me, “Do you want to run away to Vegas?”

  I gasp in disbelief. “Take a good look around, Cowboy! How many wedding cakes do you see in here?”

  Tyler spins around in a slow circle. “Oh, I guess I see about eight.”

  I nod. “…and guess who made each and every one of those cakes? How could you possibly think that I haven’t been planning my wedding cake since I pulled my first pan of cake-like-substance out of a cute little Easy Bake Oven when I was about four? You do realize that I make the majority of my income from the wedding industry? What message would it send if I skipped my own wedding?”

  “Okay, point taken. Big opulent wedding it is. I’ll even wear my dress uniform for you or you could choose a monkey suit if you prefer. I don’t care if your brother and sister are involved. I thought your sister was cool and your brother might have potential. I’m going to try to fly my parents out here as soon as possible. I’m sure my mom would love to help with your grand opening.”

  Tyler’s stomach suddenly lets out a huge growl of hunger. “Sorry, there wasn’t much food on the plane.”

  “You should have listened to me. I told you I didn’t have bad news. Go ahead and eat the wontons and I’ll warm up the other stuff. I wouldn’t want you to expire from hunger. We have a lot to celebrate tonight.”

  On the way back home from the bakery, we stopped by the grocery store because my refrigerator was completely almost bare after such a long absence. I had a young college student who was studying veterinary science take care of the animals while I was gone. Judging by the boxes in the trash, he eats like I used to eat before I met Heather. Clearly I’ve become spoiled.

  As I’m carrying groceries in from the car, I get a text from Aidan.

  “Hey Heather, if Aidan is trying to hunt down William, why wouldn’t he just call Jeff? Why is he asking me what the weather is like on the coast in February? You guys are the locals. I grew up in Oklahoma. He said something about needing a few days of privacy so fate can take its course.” I ask as I stash the produce in the fridge.

  Heather practically trips over Ethel and Annie as she stammers, “What did you say?”

  “I just got this really weird text from Aidan and I’m trying to figure out why he didn’t simply ask Kiera or Jeff for that info. I barely know the judge.”

  “Oh Geez! Tara is just too spooky for words! Don’t you see? Aidan is trying to tell you Tara knows what’s going on. He’s trying to protect our privacy in case we haven’t told anyone yet. If he called Kiera and Jeff, they would know that something was up.”

  “How in the world did you figure all that out from a strange text message asking about William’s phone number, the weather forecast on the coast in February, a request for privacy and musings about fate?” I ask, incredulous at her leap of logic.

  “First of all, I’ve learned to never underestimate Tara’s ability to predict weird stuff. I personally have never seen her be wrong. Secondly, Aidan is a big romantic, mushy guy at heart. Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. He might not be quite the big gesture guy that Jeff is, but he’s pretty darn close. If the two of them team up, there’s no telling what could happen. Something tells me I’m going to be trying to find fresh strawberries in February.”

  “Why do you sound discouraged? Isn’t this a good development for us? Doesn’t it mean that mean we don’t have to wait so long to get married?”

  “Yes, that’s the upside. But, the downside is that if they do it right away, Piper and I will still be working our way through the kinks in the new shop and something might go wrong. It could be a million and one really strange things like the refrigeration not working or the ovens running too hot. I don’t want those nightmares to play out in front of the worldwide press.”

  “Gidget, Piper’s mom is in the hospital, right?”

  Heather pauses as I interrupt her. She nods, her expression completely reflecting her befuddlement. “Yes, she had gall bladder surgery.”

  “Heather, you cooked the whole gourmet meal for me all by yourself on all of your new equipment and picked me up at the airport today without breaking a sweat. Your shop is beautiful. You chose things well. Whether you do Tara’s wedding two weeks before you open, two weeks after you open, or two years after you open; it’s going to be phenomenal. She is your best friend. You won’t allow it to be anything less than spectacular. Remember what you were able to do at Kiera’s wedding when you all you had was the food truck? There is no way this is not going to be a million times better because now it will be a signature Joy & Tiers cake.”

  “Geez Ty, maybe your talents are wasted at the Sheriff’s Department. Someone should pay you to write ad copy. You should be writing press releases for me. I can just have you walk around as my arm candy and you can be my public spokesperson.”

  “That would be fun wouldn’t it? I wish I had the luxury to do that. I’d be happy as a clam if my job was to brag about you all day to anyone who would listen.”

  “You are so funny. You would be so bored that you’d soon start carving on the furniture in the hotel rooms at the wedding venues.”

  “Well, that would be an interesting side business. I could make your party favors. Seriously Heather, you’re going to slay this.” I put the groceries down and walk Heather over to the couch and tuck her in next to me. Ethel, her grandmother’s bloodhound insists on being part of the conversation and places her head on Heather’s lap. “We probably need to have a strategy. If you’re right, our news isn’t going to be private much longer. As much as I wanted to savor this private time between us, we might need to work on a plan for telling folks in a reasonable manner. Our plan for winging it at Christmas didn’t work so well.”

  Heather smirks at the memory. “Yeah, we should probably be a little more strategic unless we want Mindy to be serenading us with the K-I-S-S-I-N-G
song all the way up the aisle during our wedding procession. So, it looks like we could start with three choices, your family, my family or the Girlfriend Posse.”

  “It’s up to you. Do you want to tackle the unknown, the hard or the fun first?” I tease.

  “Do I have to choose?” she asks, swallowing hard.

  “I suppose we could play rock, paper, scissors if you really want to.”

  Heather scowls at me. “Next, I suppose you’re going to suggest that we should play spin the bottle or something?”

  “Well, it’s even better than anything I had planned. I love how creative you are.”

  She rolls her eyes and blows a wayward curl out of her face in exasperation. “Come on Ty. I guess I’ll do the hard thing first and call my family. Please don’t tell me you were thinking that your family’s going to be the hard choice.”

  “Do you think I should talk to Carlton man-to-man first?” I ask as she walks over to the kitchen island to get her cell phone from her purse.

  “Honestly, Tyler I don’t know that there’s going to be a right way to do it with my family. So, you have to play your gut on this one.” Heather hands me her cell phone. “The only advice I’m going to give you is you might as well skip my parents. I think they’re pretty much a lost cause and I don’t want to waste our happy mood on them.”

  I take a moment to think about all of my years of service both in the military and on the force and a trait that seems to run universally through families of every background is guys are protective of their little sisters even if they don’t seem to get along. It seems worth the risk to make the call. But, just in case it gets ugly, I would prefer to do it outside of Heather’s earshot.

  Heather must be able to read the indecision on my face, because she abruptly kisses me on the cheek and says, “I’ve been cooking in the kitchen all day and I’m a sweaty mess. Why don’t you go check on the horses while I take a quick shower? Do you think it will be too late to Skype your parents when you get back?”