Man Without a Heart

by Anne Hampson

  The following morning Adam went off again, but Jill did not go out immediately. She was in a mood of brooding indecision, feeling one moment that she would be justified in leaving her husband, because he had flouted her wishes entirely by breaking the agreement which he himself had originally outlined, yet the next moment the pale sweet face of his mother would rise up before her and she would resign herself -to whatever treatment Adam might subject her to.

  And through it all she was conscious of one indisputable truth: she loved her husband, and the most painful moment in her life would be the moment when she had to leave him.

  It was not often that he was as unfeeling as last night, she instantly reminded herself. In fact, there never had been a night quite like that, for normally he treated her with the greatest respect.

  Last night he had been angry, and even though his anger had seemed to lessen, his lovemaking had been so violent that she was convinced his anger had increased again, but for what reason, she could not possibly fathom. As she sat there, her thoughts were interrupted by the doorbell, and she waited for Charon or Rita to answer it. The voice she heard made her freeze momentarily and her heartbeat increase. Julia.... Surely she knew that Adam was out. 'A visitor for you, Madam Doxaros.' Charon's expressionless voice broke into her thoughts and she automatically rose from her chair. She glanced at him, noting the wooden look on his face, and guessed instinctively that he and his wife knew that Adam had been engaged to Julia. Naturally they believed it had been broken off, since Adam would never have taken servants into his confidence. He was far too arrogant ever to let them forget that they were servants, and when he wanted one of them he clapped his hands imperiously and one or the other came running.

  'A visitor?' Jill looked at him inquiringly, feigning ignorance. 'Miss Komitas,' replied Charon. 'Shall I show her in?'

  'I am in, Charon,' Julia said with dignity and authority from the open door of the sitting room in which Jill had been sitting. 'You can go!' She spoke in Greek, but of course Jill understood, instantly resenting the girl's manner. She came forward into the room as the servant departed, closing the door quietly behind him. 'Good morning,' she said to Jill in English. 'I'm very glad I found you in. I was afraid I would arrive and find you'd gone out.'

  'Good morning, Miss Komitas. What is it you want with me?' So cool and composed the tone, but Jill's nerves were all awry, because she knew instinctively that the girl would never have come here on a friendly visit. There was no reason why she should.

  Julia walked over to a chair and sat down, her dark eyes never leaving Jill's face. 'You're very beautiful,' was her unexpected comment. 'Adam has a-weakness for beauty.' Jill stood there, staring, waiting for whatever was to come next, but Julia did not say anything more, and as the silence stretched, Jill just had to break it. 'Perhaps,' she said quietly, 'you had better explain why you are here. At present you have me very puzzled.'

  'I'm thinking of going to Mrs. Doraxos and telling her what you and Adam have done,' began Julia threateningly, 'unless of course you are willing to 'play ball,' as you say in England.' Jill's pulse raced and the colour receded from her cheeks. 'You couldn't do a thing like that!' she exclaimed, shaking her head. 'It would kill her'!'

  'I wish she were dead already,' returned Julia without hesitation. 'She's been in my way long enough.'

  'You wish her dead?' Jill stared disbelievingly at her. 'You actually wish someone dead?'

  'If she had died three months ago, Adam would not have been forced to marry you.' Julia's face had paled a little, and her hands were clenched tightly in her lap. That she was under the influence of some strong emotion was evident. 'Adam said that you were not troubled by his having to marry me—' Jill stopped, then amended, 'At least, he seemed to conclude that you were in agreement with what he was doing.'

  'Adam lays down the law,' returned Julia tightly, 'and because we're Greek, he believes he has a right to do so. I'm supposed to subject myself totally to his will.'

  Jill made no comment; she was recalling vividly Adam's firm assertion-that his fiancee had no say in the matter of his marriage to another girl.

  'You didn't mean what you said about telling; Adam's mother, surely?' she said at last, and Julia immediately nodded her head.

  'Yes, I meant it.' Her voice was taut, her eyes glinting. 'You're far too beautiful for Adam to resist for long—I know him, remember. He told me that there was to be nothing in this marriage, that it was to be purely of convenience to solve the problem of his mother's peace of mind... I agreed-at least, I had no alternative, but do you suppose I was happy at the idea of my man marrying another girl?' A terrible bitterness edged her voice now, and Jill felt actually sorry for her. 'I hated it,' added Julia quiveringly, 'hated Mrs. Doxaros for not liking me!'

  She paused, waiting, and Jill said quietly, 'Go on, Miss Komitas. You have something else to say to me.'

  'I want you to leave Adam.'

  'Leave ...?'Jill shook her head automatically. 'Mrs. Doxaros would go into a decline immediately. She's happy . . .' Jill spread her hands in a gesture of apology before she added, 'She is fond of me, very, and happy at the thought of Adam's having me for his wife. No one could be more contented than she is. Please don't make any demands that will rob her of that contentment.' Jill's voice pleaded, and so did her eyes, but Julia was not in any way affected.

  'I have given you my ultimatum,' she said inexorably. 'Either you leave or I go straight to Mrs. Doxaros and tell her what the true position is-that you and Adam are not intending to stay together.'

  Jill was trembling, under no illusions that the girl was not in deadly earnest; her expression, that tight mouth and the hard dark eyes—they were proof and more that Julia really meant to carry out her threat unless she, Jill, left Adam. She said at last, 'I suppose Adam told you everything-gave you the full details?' Jill wondered what he would do were he to know that Julia had been here, putting her terms before his wife. That he would be furiously angry went without question, but would he go as far as to throw Julia over? It was a question Jill could not even begin to answer, knowing as she did how fixed his intention was to bring about the business merger.

  'Yes, he did. It was your sister he intended to marry, and she sounded so nondescript that I wouldn't have felt myself to be in danger. ..' Her voice trailed off, and she cast a glance at Jill, obviously hoping that she had missed the point, but of course that was impossible.

  'You are not in any danger from me,' she said, endeavouring to reassure her, fighting for the happiness of her mother-in-law. 'I don't know why you should think that you are.'

  'I've already remarked on your beauty.'

  'My sister was beautiful,' inserted Jill quickly.

  'But I gained the impression that it would be impossible for Adam to become attracted by her, whereas you ...' She flicked a hand expressively, at the same time subjecting Jill to an intense examination as her eyes wandered from her hair to her face and down to the dainty ankles above smartly shod feet. 'You have everything, and the moment I set eyes on you I was troubled. You're just the kind of woman Adam would choose for a pillow friend. In fact,' she added with a vicious gritting of her teeth, 'it's a wonder he hasn't made approaches before now. Adam's a very passionate man.'

  How Jill managed to remain totally calm and unmoved, she would never to able to say.

  It seemed that in her anxiety over her mother-in-law she was given some added quality that helped her to retain her composure in the face of what Julia had said. 'Did Adam tell you the terms under which I agreed to the marriage?' asked Jill after a pause.

  'Oh, yes, I know of the financial arrangement between you.'

  'If I were to leave Adam, I'd lose the money.' It no longer was of any importance to Jill, so much had happened since the terms were laid down. Loving her husband as she did, she could never even think of the reward, which, in the beginning, had been not the main incentive but certainly an important one. It was the monetary gain, plus her pity for Mrs. Doxaros, that
had encouraged her to accept Adam's offer. 'I've thought of that,' returned the Greek girl blandly. 'I can give you the money-more than Adam offered, in fact.'

  'You know how much he offered?' Jill looked curiously at her, and Julia said no, she had no idea how much Adam had offered. 'But I trust you to tell me,' she went on immediately. 'I feel you wouldn't lie.' A small pause, and then: 'I'd double it if you'd agree to leave.'

  'I can't.'

  'Is that your last word?'

  'You must be reasonable,' pleaded Jill quiveringly. 'As I've said, you have nothing to fear from me. Adam won't ever change his mind about marrying you, simply because he wants the merger with your father's firm.'

  'I'm not so sure, now that I've seen you.' Again Julia's voice trailed away into silence. But she resumed after a pause, 'Adam's not capable of falling in love, but he's certainly the kind of man to desire, physically, a girl like you-No, please do not interrupt! I've seen the girls he's had; they were all beautiful—'

  'Surely you are aware of your own beauty,' Jill had to say, thinking that this was the strangest and most improbable conversation that could ever have occurred. 'If I appeal to Adam, then I am very sure you do, too.' The words came slowly, reluctantly, for it was difficult to admit, loving Adam as she did, that another girl would appeal to him just as much as she herself did. It seemed that he had been a rake, and Jill rather thought he always would be. He had already intimated that, after he and Julia were married, he and she would have their lovers.

  She said, speaking her thoughts aloud, 'It strikes me as very strange that you are so philosophical regarding your marriage to Adam. Don't you want to be in love with your husband?' For a moment there was silence, and as she noticed the Greek girl's changing expression, Jill knew what answer she would hear.

  'I love Adam. And now you know why I want you to leave. If you stay and he ... he becomes intimate with you, then he'll not let you go until he tires of you-even if his mother dies in the meantime. I shall be waiting for years, maybe.'

  'You believe that he would tire of me?'

  'I know he would.' Confidently, she added at once, 'He tires of every woman he has.'

  'And yet you want to marry him?'

  'I love him,' she repeated.

  'But he doesn't know?'

  The Greek girl shook her head. 'He believes it is merely a business arrangement, an ordinary arranged marriage of the kind that is customary in our country.'

  'And the merger is, in effect, your dowry?' Jill was frowning heavily at the idea of Adam being quite so mercenary as to have offered for Julia solely to obtain the dowry she could give him.

  'My father wants to retire; he is a very old man. He is very pleased with the arrangement he made with Adam, and if it wasn't for his mother, we'd have been married by now.'

  'She knew that the merger would have been effected if you and Adam had married?'

  'Yes, she knew, but Mrs. Doxaros does not believe in the dowry system, and added to that, she has always disliked me. She told Adam she would die unhappy if he married me; she would also die unhappy if he didn't marry at all.' Julia stopped a moment, her mouth tight, her dark eyes glittering like an animal's. 'She is a selfish old woman, and I hate her!'

  Jill made no comment on this, for although she knew that Mrs. Doxaros was a dear, sweet woman, she could at the same time fully understand Julia's attitude toward her.

  'To get back to this matter of my leaving Adam,' said Jill after a small pause, 'you must know that I wouldn't break my promise to him?'

  A harsh expression covered Julia's face. 'It is that or I go straight to Mrs. Doxaros and tell her just how she has been deceived. I shall tell her that you did it for money. What would she think about you then?' added Julia with a sneer of contempt. 'And what would she think of her son, to do a thing like that?'

  'She would know he'd done it for her sake,' Jill pointed out reasonably, but said no more, simply because Mrs. Doxaros would scarcely find comfort in the knowledge that Adam had done it for her, because she would know at the same time that Adam's intention had been to marry Julia once she was dead. It would be more than enough to make her have a heart attack, thought Jill, desperately unhappy. 'She would never forgive him, all the same,' stated Julia emphatically, and Jill could not argue that point, because she held the same belief herself.

  'If you do this,' she said at length, 'you'll probably lose Adam altogether, because he will never forgive you.'

  Julia seemed not to be affected by that. 'Adam's set his heart on the merger. He's a tough businessman-but you must realise that, for otherwise he would never have become engaged to me.'

  So philosophically did Julia treat the matter, thought Jill, wondering how long it would be before the absurd custom of arranged marriages was wiped out in the countries of the East. Greece was very Eastern, having been ruled by the Turks for so long. Things were changing now, and had been for some time, but as Adam had once said, custom dies hard. He had also said that in the large towns, and where the more wealthy and educated classes were concerned, the custom of arranged marriages and dowries was rapidly dying out. She supposed, viewing it objectively, that the arrangement Adam had made with Julia's father could not be classed, categorically, as an arranged marriage with a dowry in the offing. Many people married for the purpose of increasing their assets-even in England this took place, especially among the aristocracy. 'I am in deadly earnest.' Julia's voice cut into the silence, her voice vibrant with meaning but her expression now controlled. She was dignified, coolly composed in every way, but very determined.

  She spoke forcefully, going on to remind Jill that she had no intention of delaying the matter. 'You have to make up your mind immediately,' she added finally, and again a deep silence enshrouded the high-ceilinged, elegant sitting room. At last Jill said, a plea in her voice, 'You must give me some time, Miss Komitas. I can't possibly make up my mind without thinking very seriously about it.'

  At first it seemed that the Greek girl would remain adamant, but after a thoughtful moment she nodded her head and said yes, she would gibe Jill twenty-four hours in which to make her decision

  'Here's my card,' she offered, having taken it from her handbag. 'Telephone me no later than eleven o'clock tomorrow morning.' A short, significant pause before she added in soft but threatening tones, 'If I do not get the call, I shall see Mrs Doxaros and tell her everything.'

  'You know where she is at present?'

  'Adam told me last evening when he was walking with me to my table in the restaurant. She is in Athens, but you will soon be returning to Corina. I shall go there to see her.' Julia paused a moment. 'If you tell Adam that I have been here, and that I have put my terms before you, then no matter what your decision, I shall see his mother. So it will not be in her interests for you to mention this visit to your... to Adam.' Jill looked at her, fully aware of her inability to mention the word 'husband,' and once again she could understand her feelings.

  'You need not have worried,' she returned coldly. 'I had no intention of telling Adam you had been here.' She had already pondered the matter and decided that to do so would only make matters worse, because, knowing what her husband's temper was like, she had no illusions as to what state of mind he would be in. And in the end the situation would only be the same: Julia's ultimatum would still stand.

  'I'll phone you, whatever my decision,' promised Jill, a terrible feeling of despair enveloping her because she could see no other escape than acceptance of the girl's ultimatum, which meant leaving Adam almost immediately-leaving him forever, never to see him again. Only now did she fully realise that she had been subconsciously clinging to a tiny thread of hope that by some miracle her husband would fall in love with her. Yes, somewhere in the far recesses of her mind, optimism had remained alive, even though, consciously, she was resigned to the parting when Adam's mother died.

  'Please do.' Julia rose, the dignity of a queen in her movements. Looking at her, so tall and slim and beautiful, Jill was forced to own th
at she and Adam would make a most strikingly handsome couple and, to all outward appearances, would be admirably suited. 'I shall arrange for you to be paid—' A wave of Jill's hand stopped her on the instant, and she stared at her across the room, a frown on her face.

  'I promised to pay you, to compensate. ..' Her voice trailed off, coming to a halt again as she saw Jill's expression. 'I don't want your money,' Jill told her shortly. 'Do you really suppose I would sink to accepting a bribe from you?'

  'It wouldn't be, a bribe. You made a bargain with Adam—'

  'But not with you. Please do not mention it again.' Anger bit deeply into Jill's voice, and her brown eyes glinted. 'I shall make my decision, let-you have it, and as far as you and I are concerned, that will be the end of it.'

  'You're angry?'

  'I'm indignant at the idea of your offering me money!' She moved to the door and opened it. 'Good morning, Miss Komitas.'

  'You are very arrogant,' observed the Greek girl coldly. 'I don't understand why Mrs. Doxaros should like you better than me.' Her voice suddenly had a break in it, and Jill frowned involuntarily, again feeling a little rush of pity for the girl, for in a way she was in the same position as Jill herself-in love with a man who did not love her.

  'I'm sorry,' she found herself saying, but her face was unsmiling, and she let the girl go without another word, relieved to close the door behind her.