Rock Her Heart (A Bad Boy Rockstar Romance)

by Megan West

  “This is surreal,” Luke said between bites of his steak. He looked around the apartment and grimaced. “How is it our apartments are identical, but yours turned out so much more awesome?”

  Ben snorted, but said nothing.

  “Obvious, isn’t it? Shannon’s got the magic touch,” Kyle muttered before taking a sip of his soda pop.

  Luke snickered. “Of course you’d know all about her ‘magic touch’, wouldn’t ya Kyle?”

  Both Shannon and Kyle froze. The other two noticed and exchanged glances. “What the fuck?!” Luke slammed his hand down on the table, making everything rattle.

  “What?!” Shannon asked. She slammed both hands down on the table and pushed herself to stand. She was already angry. The weight of everything had overcome her in that moment and she wasn’t up for whatever bullshit Luke was about to spew. Nothing had happened and, even if it had, that was between her and Kyle. She was beyond frustrated with everything going on—it was crushing.

  “What? You think we didn’t fucking notice how you two fools froze when-”

  “Who the hell are you calling a fool?” Shannon spat as she charged forward toward Luke. Ben instinctively jumped up and stood between them, earning him an intense glare from Shannon. She pursed her lips and took a deep breath.

  “Not that it’s any of your fucking business, but nothing happened.” She reached out and slapped the glass beside her, sending soda pop to spill over the table, before stalking off and slamming her bedroom door shut.

  It was an hour later when there was a knock on her door.

  “Come in,” she called out. She didn’t want to see or talk to anybody but figured it was for the best not to make things even more tense than they already were. When she saw Kyle standing against her doorframe, she wasn’t sure how she felt. It was a relief to see him rather than Ben or Luke, but with everything that had happened it was awkward. Either way, things between them needed to be cleared up. The last thing she needed or wanted was to have a weird relationship with her best friend over a moment of weakness.

  “Things don’t have to be like this,” he muttered, taking a seat on her desk chair. “I understand what happened that night and I don’t hold it against you. We can pretend it never happened. As for those guys, they’ll eventually believe us and get over it.” He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. “Look, we’re all under a ton of pressure right now and we don’t really know how to deal with it. It’s not like this is anything any of us have ever been through, but we will get through it together.”

  “How do you always know what to say?” She felt like she was tearing up. Maybe it was foolish or maybe it made perfect sense but, in what seemed like an instant, it was like her best friend was back and a huge source of stress had vanished into thin air.

  “I don’t,” he muttered. Shannon shot him a look as he chuckled. “I guess we’re just compatible that way,” he added. He smiled and patted her on the shoulder before leaving her room. He knew her well enough to know she needed time to be alone and reflect on everything that had just happened. She needed to think. She needed to plan.

  Chapter Four

  It was Wednesday morning when they had their first meeting with their manager and a couple of executives since they had moved to the city. It was time to make a plan, or rather, agree to the plan the company had already made. They would spend the next two days going through an approved song list to select the first one to record, starting the following week. They also had to rehearse the song within those two days. They would have the weekend off, although it was “strongly encouraged” they use that time to rehearse, write, and look over the list again in case another song caught their eye. The following two days they spent hours in a conference room, more than at their apartments.

  It was amazing and exciting, but incredibly stressful. The four of them got back to their apartments completely drained on both nights, falling into bed and drifting off to sleep for a few hours before going back at it. They were allowed full use of the practice room on the weekend so they stayed pretty much all Saturday until they were satisfied with the sound of the song they had chosen. They recorded a low quality version on Shannon’s phone before heading back to her apartment to save it to her laptop.

  “We should rest up tomorrow,” she finally suggested. She didn’t think if they were too brutal with themselves over the weekend it would be beneficial come Monday, when recording started. They agreed. Ben and Luke immediately retreated to their own apartment, while Shannon sat on the couch and turned on the television.

  “I’m going out for a while,” Kyle said.

  “What?” She looked over the back of the couch at him in surprise. She would have bet good money he would just stay in his room.

  “What? I want to go for a walk, get to know the neighborhood, just do a little something. I’ll be back later, all right? Don’t wait up,” he smiled cheekily and walked out the door.

  Shannon just stared after him. She briefly wondered if he was running away from being alone with her, but then shook it off. He had every right to want to get out and actually do something. Just because all she wanted was to stay in didn’t mean he felt the same way. Besides, they had already cleared everything up. Kyle had been absolutely right in saying there was no need for things to be awkward between them.

  She had made a choice during a moment of intense vulnerability and he had been perfectly understanding of it, which wasn’t the least bit surprising. Of course he was always someone she could count on no matter the situation and no matter how stupidly she handled it. She ran her hand through her hair and looked over at her phone, resting silently atop the coffee table.

  She had no idea what possessed her to do it, but she reached out for her phone and opened up her messages.

  “If you’re serious, you’ll make time for me.” She typed in his phone number, which she still hadn’t saved, and hit “send” before she had a chance to chicken out. It was a mere minute later when her phone buzzed with a reply from Ash.

  “Are you free now?”

  Her heart started racing and her breath caught in her throat. Was it really possible he wanted to see her right then and there? She hadn’t expected such a prompt response, much less one like this. She pushed away everything that made her overthink because it would only end up driving her crazy and leave her even more frustrated than she already was. She had decided to message him and now she was determined to see things through. Whatever happened would come to pass and she would deal with it. Either way, she knew she would never be at peace if she didn’t talk to him at least once face to face. As hard as it would be to see him, this was something she just had to do.

  “Yes,” she replied. Her heart was racing by the time his reply came, asking for her address. She dropped her phone and stopped breathing for a moment. Inviting him over was probably a mistake. It was likely a big, if not huge, mistake. The two of them together and alone in the privacy of her home was as risky as it could get. Even still, there was a part of her that was aching to just send him the address and wait until he arrived.

  She wanted to believe she could be strong enough to have him over without giving in to all of her desires, but she knew better. Deep down she knew better than to think she could simply ignore everything she was feeling, things that would only be made stronger the moment she laid eyes on him.

  She placed her hand on her chest and took a deep breath. She remembered how hearing his voice had wrecked her. With a shudder, she recalled what it had pushed her to do. Kyle, she thought. She wanted to call him and beg him to come back. She wanted to ask him to stop her from being reckless and stupid with her heart, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Even though he had told her he would always be there for her and she knew she could always count on him, this was too much.

  She needed to stop herself or deal with the consequences of her choices. Her phone buzzed again. It was a single question mark. Her heart started racing again as her legs trembled. It no longe
r felt like a choice. Stupidly and helplessly, she plunged ahead. She swiped her phone off the floor and messaged him her address. Not a minute later, he let her know he was on his way.

  She jumped up from the couch and started pacing back and forth. This was really happening. Less than a month ago she was still in her hometown with her regular life. Now she had a music contract, was living in the city, and was about to see her him. Sure, she had dated since they broke up, but everything was casual and unimportant. She knew she had never completely gotten over Ash and if she was reading the signs correctly, he had never fully gotten over her either.

  She bolted into her bedroom to check her reflection. She looked good. This was insane, but she couldn’t think of it. Sooner than she had expected there was a knock on her door. She turned around and stared at it until another knock came. Her heart was pounding so hard it was deafening. The blood pumping in her ears was louder even than the third knock that came.

  He was really on the other side of the door waiting for her and probably growing impatient. Then she remembered Ben and Luke were just across the hall. Her eyes widened and she bolted to the door, pulling it open and yanking Ash in from the collar of his leather jacket without thinking. She closed and locked her door, turning to face him.

  The moment her eyes met his, she stopped breathing and everything went silent. Even the pounding of her blood seemed to have stopped. She couldn’t believe he was really standing in front of her. She was speechless. Taking a moment to truly look at him she noticed the difference. He was thinner. He looked more worn. With sadness she realized what Mikey had told her was likely true. That aside, he was as gorgeous as ever. Jet black hair, piercing blue eyes, fair skin, broad shoulders and a lean, tall body still made him as eye-catching as the day they met. It took all her self-control not to reach out and touch him. She swallowed.

  “You gonna say anything or you just gonna stare at me all day?” His voice was raspy and sexy. He always spoke with smooth confidence, but she could still detect a hint of uncertainty and nervousness when he spoke this time.

  “What do you want me to say?” It came out more offensive than she meant but she didn’t care. She hadn’t invited him over with the intention of making nice. To be fair, she wasn’t entirely sure what her intention was when she invited him over. She had just been so overwhelmed by everything, including Ash, that she needed something to be done.

  He stared at her for a moment before walking forward and pulling her into a passionate kiss. She knew the smart thing to do was push him away, but she had no fight left in her. She sunk right into the kiss, leaning into his body. She breathed in his scent and felt his warmth. She savored the taste of his tongue in her mouth. She enjoyed reliving such a kiss with him. It was awful and would likely spell catastrophe for her sooner rather than later, but she couldn’t help giving in entirely. When she had told him she missed him, she meant it. So she plunged forward, full speed, and decided to just take the events of the night as they came.

  He pulled back and looked into her eyes. She ran her hand through his hair, almost as silky smooth as she remembered it being.

  “Shannon,” he muttered. It was the first time hearing him say her name in a slightly broken voice. She crumbled even further. She was so lost. She had been a fool to even want to believe she could be strong enough to resist this. Resisting him had never been her strong suit.

  Even after everything was said and done, she loved him. She loved him like she had never loved anybody else. He elicited a strong reaction in her she didn’t know was possible unless he was around. She looked into his eyes and recalled when he asked her to follow him. Why had she been such a fool to say no?

  He grabbed her face between his hands and kissed her again. In that moment she couldn’t doubt his love for her. Things hadn’t ended because he had abandoned her. He gave her a chance to follow him and, in that moment, she couldn’t figure out why she ever thought ending things was the best move for them both. Even after all the time that had passed and their separate lives, they were drawn together now by a force she couldn’t deny.

  As dangerous as it was, she didn’t want to stop.

  Chapter Five

  He reached out and pulled at one of the straps of her top until it dropped off her shoulder. He hooked a finger under the leather collar she wore and tugged on it, devious smirk in place. She knew where this was going. It wasn’t just sex; it was sex as they had always enjoyed it. It was like everything had fallen right back into place, just like it had been years ago.

  She knew it wasn’t smart to give in, but she couldn’t help it. If only hearing his voice had such a strong effect on her, she couldn’t resist the feel of his lips against hers. Knowing what waited as this progressed, she simply didn’t have the will power to push him away and put a stop to it. It had been years since she last felt him. It had been far too long and now that she had given in this much she figured she might as well go all the way. She could deal with the fall out later.

  Eagerly, he tugged down on the top of her shirt until he exposed one of her breasts, hard nipple on full display. She inhaled sharply the moment she felt the tight pinch of her nipple rolling between his thumb and index fingers. It was tight and it hurt, but she didn’t mind it one bit.

  The more he touched her and jolts of pleasurable pain shot through her body, the quieter the screaming in her mind saying this was a terrible idea got. She had reached a point where she didn’t care nor could she care. Every one of her senses was invaded by him, just like she knew it would happen. Still she had called him. Still she had invited him over.

  He pulled his hand back just enough to give her exposed breast a couple smacks before looking at her. His eyes were stern, but his devious little smirk had a certain playfulness to it. Instantly, she remembered seeing that facial expression on him multiple times in the past. It was as if she had stepped into a time machine or something. Everything about his expression was severe and serious. It turned her on.

  Suddenly, he slammed her back against the door. She cried out from the sudden pain going through her body, but he quickly placed his mouth over hers, stifling the noise. Her eyes widened when she realized there was a chance Ben or Luke could have heard her. Then she remembered Kyle could be coming back home any minute– a thought that was promptly wiped away when she fell right into the fervent kiss Ash laid on her.

  His hands were roaming up and down her sides like they always had. It didn’t feel foreign. It felt as great as she remembered it. He slipped a hand under the hem of her top and curled it around her hip until she felt a tight squeeze on her ass cheek. He squeezed it again so hard she squealed into his mouth. Then he grabbed both of her hips firmly and pulled them toward him so she could feel his hard bulge rub against her. She broke the kiss with a panty moan.

  As soon as the moan escaped her lips, Ash pressed his index finger against her lips.

  “Shhh,” he warned her.

  His gaze was directed at the door across the hall and she knew he was thinking of Ben and Luke, or perhaps any random passerby. She stood there against the wall with one of her breasts exposed, panting heavily. Ash snapped his fingers and jerked his head in the direction of the bedroom. He didn’t need to say anything. He turned on his heel and led the way, Shannon trailing behind him like a well-trained puppy.

  She really felt like one. She felt like a puppy that had been lost and was glad to be around the owner again, ready and willing to do all of his bidding. He turned around and hooked his finger under her collar to pull her forward, kissing her roughly. He started petting her hair and she felt more like a puppy than ever.

  Her knees shook and she felt on the verge of collapse.

  “Get on the bed,” he muttered against her lips. Then he grabbed her chin gruffly between his fingers and added, “On all fours.”

  She nodded, not breaking eye contact even once. She knew exactly what was coming.

  “So you’ve been having a rough time, huh?” She nodded. He ran his
hand up and down her back, “I know how it is.” He sounded genuine. She believed he meant it.

  He pushed her chin upward so her gaze met his. There was a look in his eyes she knew all too well, confirming her suspicions on what he was planning on doing next. He ran his hand straight down her back and then gave her a light, playful spank on her ass cheek. She bit her lower lip. His hand slipped under the hem of her skirt and he gave her a few more light, playful spanks.

  But she knew that was far from it. He wasn’t one to just playfully spank and move on. That was his warm up. She had never forgotten that one of his favorite things was always to make her ass turn a red and raw. He loved to punish her until he left her so sore it was difficult to sit without wincing in pain. And it wasn’t until she knew it was coming that she realized it was something she actually missed.

  “Oh, Shannon.” She looked up at him. He was looking at her with interest, but there was something else there. It looked like he had missed her too, but she knew he wasn’t one to openly admit it. The look he was giving her and her interpretation of it was the closest she would ever get to it, and she had to accept that. Then he smirked. Her heart started pounding even faster than it already was.