Back To Good

by Laura Benson

  Clara took Joey on a quick tour of the shop, introducing him to various employees and some loyal customers that had shown up to see him and to help out Clara. She was a dynamo around her store. It impressed me that she could talk to her customers so easily. She knew names, she’d place soft touches on shoulders, shake hands firmly. She had a perfect balance of friendliness and professionalism.

  Matthew, on the other hand, seemed to have a permanent scowl on his face after the phone call. I’d hit up the coffee shop and bought one for him, thinking the caffeine would lighten the mood. I didn’t need Joey’s manager up in arms for any reason. I wanted tonight to go as smoothly as possible. And if we got through this, the radio show would be a piece of cake, and the concert would be the Pièce de résistance.

  I handed Matthew his coffee.

  “Thanks,” he said stiffly.

  I took a sip of mine first, then answered, “No problem. Sorry I couldn’t put anything stronger in it.” I smiled up at him.

  He watched me curiously. “No, it’s fine.” He blew on his hot beverage, and I watched him as both of his hands grabbed the cup, and he lifted it to his lips. He inhaled the scent of the dark roast, which seemed to relax him somewhat.

  I smiled slightly when his Adam’s apple bobbed with the sip. Watching his throat move in such a manner was definitely causing heat to flush my face. I needed to pull my gaze away from his neck and his sensuous lips. “Do you want to talk about it?” I indicated to the jeans pocket where he had put his phone.

  And just as the softness approached, his flirty mood changed in a flash. His steely gaze held mine for what seemed like forever. I thought he was about to discuss it, but he just looked at me. “It’s nothing,” he finally said. “Just some issues with the electrical and sound at the Bowl. We’ll get it fixed.” I gathered that he was lying.

  I narrowed my gaze and twitched my lips to say something. I wasn’t entirely sure I believed him. There was no way that heated conversation was only about lighting and sound.

  Clara came up to the both of us before I could call him out on his bullshit. “Joey’s going to do a sound check before we start. Charlie, we have the table all set up for your posters, and I have the boxes of CDs behind the table. Pens are on the table, as well as the bottles of water.”

  I gave her a genuine smile, almost hugging her. She singlehandedly got everything set up with minimal help from me. “Thanks, Clara. I can’t tell you how much I really appreciate all of this.” I indicated the store, then looked up at Matthew, who was still looking at me and not paying any attention to Clara. I gave him a confused expression and turned back to Clara, joking, “I think Matthew appreciates your help, too.”

  Matthew barely gave her a sideways glance. I was about to call him on his rudeness when Joey popped up, slapped Matthew on the shoulder, and turned to Clara, “Just about ready for that sound check, Clara.” Joey was bouncing with energy, and I was hoping it wasn’t caused by anything other than adrenaline. He didn’t need a chemical high.

  I pursed my lips, studying the two of them, how different they were. Joey was jazzed and Matthew was just standing there, not really here, and not paying attention. Whatever that call was, it really put him in a foul mood.

  Once Clara and Joey ambled off, I was able to focus on the grumpy manager.

  “Okay, spill, Matthew.” I gave him my no nonsense voice. “What is the problem?”

  He frowned at me, his eyes darkening to near black. I could tell he was angry, but I wasn’t sure how to stem the brewing storm that seemed to be gathering around him.

  “It’s nothing, Charlie,” he said tightly.

  I just sighed and went back to my drink. If he wanted to be like this, fine. I wasn’t about to be dragged into his mood. And I’d be damned if I’d allow this to affect my client. I needed calm and good thoughts to get this gig over and end a success.

  After a few minutes of sound checks, the store was starting to get noisy with the growing crowd. People were heading toward the back to where Joey would be performing. I left Matthew to wallow in his misery as I plastered a smile on my face and went to the back. Joey and Clara were talking in soft whispers, while people milled around, waiting for the show to start. Originally, I was going to introduce Joe, but we decided he didn’t need that, so I just gave him the signal to start. With a quick hug to Clara, he slid his guitar into place and stepped up to the microphone.

  “Hi,” he said shyly into the mic. Girls started screaming, and guys started chanting, and Joey lifted a hand to his ear, his smile growing into a grin. “Yeah, I’m not sure I heard that.”

  With that, the crowd went wild. The decibel levels were mind-blowing.

  Joey nodded enthusiastically. “That’s a fuck lot better. So you’re probably wondering why I’m here.”

  He tuned the pegs on his guitar as he expertly engaged the audience. He certainly knew what he was doing. I was impressed. He laughed when someone shouted, “She wanted to fuck him silly.” I turned to Matthew and rolled my eyes. He didn’t bat an eye, just stood there like a statue.

  “Well, darlin’, that sounds good to me, but honestly I’m here to make amends to my fans and the public.” At the few boos from the crowd, he gave a humbled shrug. “I’ve been a shithead lately and well; you see that girl over there?” He pointed over to me, and I felt my face instantly turning bright red. “That’s Charlie. She and I go way back, and she’s here to help me get my shit together, and I think this idea she came up with is brilliant.”

  To that, people started clapping and whistling. I think Clara had the loudest whistle out of everyone. After a few more words, he started in on one of his earliest hits and got the crowd rocking and rolling. Even I couldn’t help shaking my hips and bouncing along to the music. He sounded great. No, he sounded perfect.

  He played some old stuff, and then introduced a song that he’d been working on. It was a slower paced song that showcased the lower register of his voice. You could hear that tell-tale break in it that had always given me shivers. Partway into the song, he shut his eyes and sang about things that he wanted but could never have, love that was fleeting and destined to end up as dry and cracked as the desert land. It was beautiful and relevant and touched my heart in a place I thought had shriveled up. I never once thought the song could be about us, but it was a perfect song to make me realize that Joey didn’t forget me for all these years.

  With the last chord, Joey’s eyes stayed closed, but the crowd was in a frenzy. I just stared at him, wondering what or who that song could be about. Wondering if it had anything to do with me.

  And just as I was lost in my wondering, Matthew breathed in my ear, “He still cares about you.” His warm breath caused shivers to trail down my spine. He was standing so close to me; I could almost feel him. I pressed a hand to my chest, his heavenly scent forcing me to close my eyes and calm my heart that was beating overtime in my chest.

  “I still care for him, too,” I murmured, afraid to turn around to face him. I watched Joey untangle his guitar and head over to the table. Clara walked alongside him, keeping some of the more aggressive fans at bay.

  “Have you given any thought to rekindling that relationship?” Matthew asked quietly.

  My lips slammed into a straight line. I had thought about it. Not on purpose, but it had softly skimmed my thoughts. I didn’t want to be known as the ex who got back with him because he was famous. There was also the cheating aspect. How could I trust him when he traveled for shows? Women were constantly throwing themselves at him, how would I know that he wouldn’t act on it? Yes, it was a fleeting thought but now, my thoughts were all a jumble with Matthew directly behind me. My synapses were firing on all cylinders. Being this close to him was too overpowering, and I found myself swaying backward, wanting to feel his broad chest against my back.

  I continued to watch Joey, really wondering about that possibility. Sex with him was one thing, but I didn’t think I’d ever be able to trust him again, and that was a hard
line for me. Without trust, there was no relationship.

  Trying to clear my sexually frustrated brain, I took in a fortifying breath and licked my dry lips. I turned to face Matthew, then stepped back when I realized we were only inches apart. His hooded eyes had that sensual look to them. The longing looks he was giving me also reflected a bit of sadness when he asked about getting back with Joey. Just watching these emotions flit through Matthew was enough to confuse and excite me. I bit my lip before answering his question.

  “We wouldn’t work,” I stated simply, then I took a deep breath and walked away.

  The night was winding down, and I couldn’t have been happier with the way the record store show went. Joey was in his element, and people left happy and sated. He’d kissed a ton of cheeks, signed plenty of chests, and had a great time. It was Matthew snarling in the corner that had me up in arms. I really didn’t need his attitude to ruin the end to a perfect night, and I was about to tell him to go home.

  While Clara had some employees breaking down the set behind us, I’d sat down in the chair beside Joey. He listened as I grumbled about miserable rat-bastard managers.

  “He’s in a mood?” Joey leaned into my shoulder, knocking it with his own.

  I ran a hand through my hair, mussing it up more than necessary. “I don’t know what his problem is. He had a phone call from hell, then became a fucking nightmare. Christ, am I going to have to deal with this every time a call doesn’t go his way?” Even though Matthew was being an asshole, he still managed to cause my emotions to jump all over the fucking place. One minute I want to turn into him and kiss the hell out of him, and the next I want to stick a bloody stiletto into his heart. I wiped my face and turned to Joey, softening my gaze. “You were fantastic tonight.”

  Joey looked straight ahead. “You haven’t heard me in while?” His shoulders were a bit slumped, and he fiddled with a water bottle while trying to avoid my eyes.

  I shook my head sadly. The words just couldn’t come out, and I hoped he understood. After we broke up, listening to his music just tore at my soul. Although I couldn’t completely get away from it, I didn’t actively seek it out.

  “I understand,” he said, but I could tell he was moping.

  I sighed. Why the hell did he have the right to be upset? He cheated on me! “Do you?” I asked, a bit harsher than I intended. I looked behind me to see Clara delegating work. “She seems into you,” I stated nonchalantly, wanting to take the focus away from Memory Lane.

  Joey looked behind me and smiled. “Clara is a character, that’s for sure.” His green eyes were shining, probably from the adrenaline of performing. Then he seemed to switch gears, becoming a little more serious. He raised an eyebrow, gesturing to where Matthew was still standing with a scowl. “What’s going on between you and Matthew?”

  “Nothing.” I sputtered quickly as I stole a quick glance at Matthew. If you didn’t know the history between the two of us, you’d think he was jealous of me sitting with Joey. “Same as always.” I gave him a tired grin.

  “Never understood why you two didn’t get along.” He shook his head and laughed, probably at some memory of me and Matthew trying to one-up each other. “My best friend and my best girl. You guys should’ve been friends,” he mused sadly.

  “Yeah,” I said sadly. “Well that was a long time ago.” I tried looking anywhere but at the longing looks from Joey. I shouldn’t have brought up our complicated past. It wasn’t fair to me or to him. I’d gotten over the bitterness a long time ago, but for some reason, some of it still managed to grab hold of my heart, splintering it into a thousand shards.

  “Not that long ago, Charlie,” he said softly.

  My breathing hitched when he rubbed a hand behind my neck, playing with the underside of my hair. It felt good and comforting, but it was a mistake. I cautiously shook his hand off, pushing my chair back. “I need to talk to Clara.” I jumped up suddenly, tripping my way over to her.

  Before I could get to her, Matthew blocked my path. He was looking over at Joey squinting at him. “What was that about?” he demanded.

  I took a step back. “Not that it’s any of your business, but we were discussing me and him.”

  Matthew snorted, “I thought you two wouldn’t work?” His eyes had narrowed into tiny slits, but I could see the lustful emotion in them as well. My body shivered in response. That I could elicit such feelings from him, surprised me and concerned me. I really didn’t know how to handle this.

  I sighed raggedly. “It wasn’t that kind of discussion. Now if you’d please move, I need to talk to Clara.”

  Instead of letting me go, Matthew took a step closer towering over me and ran a few fingers down my neck where prickles popped out across my body. I questioningly stared up him, his smile private at the same time he stepped back from me waving his hand to let me go.

  I talked to Clara for a few minutes, thanking her and handing her an envelope with the money we negotiated. I was hoping she’d be able to use it to do something special with the store. She’d mentioned some ideas about getting in some biographies on rock stars. She wanted a one-stop shop. I could see her expanding and making all her dreams come true.

  “You ready?” Joey came up to Clara, putting an arm around her shoulders, pal–like.

  “You guys heading out?” I spat out unexpectedly. I wasn’t jealous, just surprised by this turn of events. Taking a deep breath, I did everything I could to control the emotions that were flooding me. Plus, when had they made the plans to go out?

  Clara spoke first. “Yeah, we’re going to get some drinks.” She looked at Joey, then back to me with a bit of confusion on her face. “Did you want to come?” she asked tentatively. I really didn’t mean anything by my accusation, but it must have looked that way.

  I wasn’t sure if this was a date, but Joey refused to look at me. After our little chat a few minutes ago, I was confused. However, I wouldn’t give anyone the satisfaction of knowing how uncomfortable I felt. I pulled myself up and stood straighter, my chin held high, plastering a fake smile on my face to let them know that I was perfectly fine with the two of them heading out. I mean I even thought they’d be a cute couple together just a while ago. “I think I’ll just head back to the hotel and get some room service.”

  Clara nodded and thanked me again, then left with Joey. I picked up my bag from under the table and pulled my phone out. I could take a cab back to the hotel without an issue, but since I came with Matthew, I felt sort of obligated to let him know I was leaving.

  I glanced across the store. He was talking to one of the customers who’d come for Joey. I could still see Joey’s autograph in Sharpie on her chest. Then again, she was all chest and not much else. She kept touching Matthew’s arm, while moving her other hand over to his chest.

  Approaching them, I rolled my eyes and cleared my throat to get his attention. “I’ve called a cab to get me back to the hotel. Just wanted to let you know.” Then I turned on my heel and walked away quickly before he could reprimand me for leaving.

  Unfortunately for me, I wasn’t quick enough. I hadn’t walked more than a few feet before I felt his hand tighten around my upper arm, pulling me around so fast, the momentum flattened me against his solid chest. I felt both of his arms go around me, pressing me tighter to him.

  “What do you want, Matthew?” I tried to wiggle away from him.

  “I’ll drive you back to the hotel,” he growled. His gaze flaring at me.

  I looked over his shoulder to watch the girl he was just flirting with stare open-mouthed at us.

  I didn’t have time for his stupid games. “I said I will take a cab,” I hissed back at him, finally shaking my arm out of his grip and stepping away from his chest. Ever since that damn phone call, he’d been a royal bitch, and I didn’t have the energy tonight to deal with whatever make-believe issues he was dealing with.

  Matthew looked down at me with a look of sadness mixed with expectation. It was a conflicting emotion that I didn�
�t understand at all. He ran his hand through his hair while glancing distractedly around the store. “Where’s Joey?”

  “He and Clara went for drinks, and now I’m going back to the hotel. I’m tired and hungry.” I turned again on my heel, but I could feel him behind me.

  “Let me take you out for dinner then.”

  I stopped short, not expecting those words out of his mouth. I tilted my head over my shoulder, a skeptical look on my face. He now wore a sheepish smile, which entirely replaced whatever had angered him earlier.

  “Why on Earth would I want to have dinner with a complete asshole?” I raised my eyebrows and propped one hand on my hip. He wasn’t the only one who could be in a mood.

  His smile faltered a bit. “I know, I was jerk earlier, just…something came up, and it set me off.” He took a careful step toward me. “You said you were hungry, and I could eat something. I’d just rather not eat alone.” He gestured between the two of us.

  I stifled a groan and rubbed my forehead, trying to ward off a headache coming on. Men and their mood swings. I was at my wits end. And I could feel my quiet evening in my hotel room slipping away from me.

  One more look at Matthew’s now humbled face, and I knew I was going to lose this battle. Swallowing a frustrated groan, I reminded myself that I was really hungry, and eating alone was never fun, even in a fairly decent hotel room. Matthew watched me expectantly.

  “Fine,” I sighed. “But we’re eating at the hotel.”

  He nodded his head in my direction. Victory shone in his eyes. When my eyes met with his, I could see a bit of excitement about spending more time with me. Why he was doing this was beyond anything I could understand.

  I told the cabbie outside that I wasn’t in need of his services. Thankfully another couple was, and the driver got his fare. Matthew and I drove silently to the hotel. I looked at my phone for any emails or texts that might’ve come in earlier and noticed one from my dad and another from Andrew. I was in no mood to deal with either, so I marked them to follow up later.