White Lies and Other Half Truths

by Barbara Tiller Cole

  With a disgusted snarl, Mr. Bennet said, “I assume you want to discuss how that snake has been attempting to blemish your name in the neighbourhood.” Darcy started slightly and Bennet continued, “Do not think me unable to tell true character, Mr. Darcy. I have heard some of the same stories I imagine you have over the years. While you may have more first hand knowledge, I knew which man to stand by."

  He reached over and picked up the decanter of port and refreshed both of their glasses. “When my Lizzy came to me with Wickham’s tale of woe after he spouted his poison to her, I told her to be careful judging either you or Wickham before knowing you both well.”

  Mr. Bennet lifted his arms up and placed his hands behind his head. “The reality, Mr. Darcy, is that I do know you. I have followed your life. I have kept up with you through your uncle, and I knew there had to be a reason for any decision you would make. I decided to speak with Colonel Forster. I discovered that Mr. Wickham had accumulated quite a bit of debt for just two weeks in one neighbourhood. I purchased the debt, by the way. Call it a future guarantee I could send him to debtors prison should he impose himself on any of the young women of my acquaintance,” Mr. Bennet put his arms back no his desk.“ After speaking with Colonel Forster, he agreed to assist me in having him transferred elsewhere, and I will gladly tell you that he was transferred to Newcastle while you were in London.”

  Mr. Bennet concluded, “Mr. Darcy, you should also know none of my family, with the exception of Mrs. Bennet, knows of my history with your family. You may tell Lizzy if you like. She should know just how highly I hold you and your family. I did tell her that I knew your family, but nothing further.”

  Darcy said with gratitude, “Mr. Bennet, I am truly grateful you took such prodigious care of this matter regarding Wickham. I had written to Colonel Fitzwilliam… ah, Richard, as you are friends with his father, to see if he would help me affect a transfer. He wrote back to say it had already been accomplished. I did not initially think it to be you, Mr. Bennet, but I thank you.”

  “Glad to be of assistance, and glad to get the scoundrel out of Meryton. He could cause nothing but trouble for you now that you are to marry Lizzy. I could not chance him trying to take vengeance on you through one of my daughters. I did it to protect my family. Speaking of family William, I was so sorry for your loss, or should I say losses. Lady Anne was a wonderful woman, and I know you miss her still. And my friend George, well, the world is less bright because of his passing," Mr. Bennet shared, bringing his arms back to his desk.

  Darcy saw that Mr. Bennet’s eyes were wet, though the tears did not fall. Suddenly with dawning comprehension, Darcy said, “My father often talked of you, Mr. Bennet.”

  Mr. Bennet laughed and held out his hand, “Ah… Yes… son,” and then he, as an after thought extended his hand and said, “Mr. Darcy, it is quite good to meet you, my name is Thomas Bennet, but your father called me Tom.”

  Darcy shook his hand heartedly, as he smiled and said, “He never gave me many details regarding your friendship, Mr. Bennet. But, one of the last things he said was Fitzwilliam, if you ever have the good fortune to meet my friend Tom, tell him I love him and I have missed him. I should have tried to find you, Mr. Bennet…” and Darcy trailed off as he looked regretfully.

  “Well, well, we are to be family now are we not, son?” One of the warmest smiles that ever graced Tom Bennet’s face was bestowed on his soon to be son-in-law.

  “We are indeed. I dare say my father would be pleased?”

  “Oh, I dare say your father would be ecstatic, as we often discussed a hopeful match between our children. I dare say you are grateful that our hopes have been realized instead of those of your Aunt Catherine, eh, Mr. Darcy?”

  “Grateful indeed, Mr. Bennet,” and Darcy chuckled, then his eyes widen in comprehension. “Wait, if you are…”

  “Yes, it does indeed, it does indeed,” Bennet said as he shook his head and grinned.

  *~*~*~*~*

  Tom was sitting at his desk and smiling. His elbows were on the desk and his hands were under his chin with his index fingers up to his nose. He was tapping his nose without even realizing it, to the rhythm of the music playing in his head.

  *~*~*~*~*

  Tom Bennet was at a ball and the most beautiful creature he had ever beheld had just entered the ballroom. He was three and twenty, and it was her coming out ball. He was struck, love struck, at first sight. He had managed to ask her to dance, and when he first touched her hand, it was like fireflies dancing through his body.

  *~*~*~*~*

  Tom shook his head, sighed and came back to the room. As he thought of his time spent with Mr. Darcy, he realized that if this was what it was going to be like to have sons-in-law, he was going to enjoy it indeed. Well, it might be unlikely any of them will be as clever as Elizabeth’s Darcy. It had been a fine day indeed.

  *~*~*~*~*

  As the day came to an end, Lizzy and Jane sat upon her bed. It had been their habit for many years to sit together and review the day in one or the other’s bedrooms. Since Lizzy’s engagement, this pattern had been broken. Lizzy had not come to Jane’s room, and as Jane had decided that Lizzy had chosen to keep to her own counsel had not approached her. But tonight, Jane was determined to make sure her dearest sister was not making a mistake. When she entered Elizabeth’s bedroom she found Lizzy sitting on her bed, looking off into space and smiling. She was so far off in her own thoughts; she did not hear Jane enter the room.

  Jane entered the room and sat on Lizzy’s bed. “Lizzy, you seem much more peaceful tonight. Are you happy, dearest sister? Please tell me you are. I so want to be sure you are content. I could not bear it if you did not respect your husband. You have seemed so upset the last couple days I was afraid you were angry with him? Did he hurt you?”

  “Oh no, Jane, it is much the opposite I dare say.” Elizabeth’s smile grew a bit wider.

  “Oh… really… now you have aroused my curiosity. Pray; tell me what you mean, Lizzy.”

  “Jane, oh Jane,” Elizabeth took Jane’s hands in her own. “Has… ah… has any man ever kissed you?” Lizzy blushed and looked at the bed when she spoke and then back up at Jane with a blush and a raised brow.

  Jane giggled, “So that is what this smile is all about. No, but I dare say I would not push Mr. Bingley away should he try,” Jane said with a giggle. “He is so wonderful. I think he is the most perfect man in the world, well, at least for me.” Jane stopped and looked at Elizabeth with almost the same impertinent grin and raised brow.

  “Yes, Mr. Bingley does seem to be quite perfect for you. Has he not spoken of marriage yet, Jane? I thought he would have made an offer by now.”

  “Oh, Lizzy, I do hope so. He is so considerate. Perhaps he does not want to detract from your and Mr. Darcy’s wedding. He told me today he could not imagine being happy with anyone but me in his life. I do so want that to mean he intends to offer for me. Do you think that is what he was saying? I confess I want to believe it to be so.”

  “Oh, Jane, I believe he loves you very much. William told me the other day he had never seen Mr. Bingley as deeply in love as he is with you. He also asked me what I thought about having Mr. Bingley as a brother. I believe he wanted to make sure your feelings were as strong as his friend’s. Without breaking any confidences, dear sister, I assured him that I believed your heart to be deeply engaged. Do you not think Mr. Bingley’s best friend would know something of his feelings? So there!”

  They both laughed. “Lizzy, what are your feelings for Mr. Darcy? Do you love him? We always agreed to only marry for love. What has changed so suddenly? Why, it was not two weeks ago that I thought you hated the man.”

  “Oh, Jane, my heart is so full of William. As my father has suggested to me, I have NEVER been indifferent to him. I have always had very strong feelings for him. Did I tell you of the first time I saw him and Mr. Bingley riding across the field of Netherfield at a breakneck pace? Something stirred in me at that moment. I h
ardly knew what to call it then, but I think I may have fallen in love with him at first sight. Then there was his comment at the Meryton Assembly, and many misunderstandings after that. But when he kissed me at the ball…” and then she stopped. She had never told her sister about 'the event.'

  Lizzy then spent time telling Jane about her and William’s rather unique courtship. She did not tell her of the conversation she had overheard between her mother and her friends. There was no use in having Jane become terrified of marital duties as well. And after this morning, Lizzy did not think she was fearful anymore. Her time in the glen with William that day, as well as his kisses, had awakened something in her she could not name. But she knew that she looked forward to seeing him in the morning. After Jane left for her bed, she realized she never answered her sister's question. Do I love William? However the more important question to her now, as she drifted off to sleep was, Do I tell him that I love him?

  Chapter 7

  3 December 1811

  Darcy awoke at Netherfield realizing he had slept better than he had in over a week. He contemplated all the revelations of the previous day as he readied himself for his walk to Longbourn in the morning’s first light. As he left and began to walk, he gathered his thoughts, as he wanted to have a plan.

  Amidst the revelations of the Darcy, Fitzwilliam and Bennet families’ connections -- Darcy did not forget his early meeting with Elizabeth the day before. He was so grateful she had been willing to tell him what had upset her. He was quite angry that Mrs. Bennet and her friends would think such things about him, but the only thing that mattered was what Lizzy, his Lizzy, thought about him. She had become Luscious Lizzy in his thoughts. He could not shake the inappropriate pet name. He was not sure when, if ever he would use it with her, very likely not until they were married for some time; but luscious she was.

  Thinking over their kiss, when he had pulled her onto his lap, it had only been seconds before he had become erect. That was one of the problems he had to face. He had to move slowly. Her fears would quickly overwhelm her if he did not take his time; savour each moment, each step forward. He needed to talk with her, explain things to her, alleviate all her fears, or at least as many as he could.

  Recently married men of his acquaintance had told him, perhaps when they were in their cups, so many different stories of maidens on their wedding nights. There were stories of horrified young brides, or young brides coming into the flower of youth. But there were also tales of young wives bringing to their young husbands hours on end of wantonness. Darcy knew there were probably many levels in the middle, but he desired the latter. He wanted, needed, and desired his Luscious Lizzy. His hope and wish was for her to enjoy the marital bed as much as he. That would require fortitude, it would require patience, and it would require him to remember constantly his love for her—not just his lust.

  Darcy thought back to when his father caught him pleasuring himself when he was fourteen. His father made a decision at that time to educate him in such matters. He did not want his son to be found in a compromising situation, forced to live his life regretting his choices. He did for Fitzwilliam what his father had done for him. He made an arrangement with a courtesan, who had a reputation for being quite discrete, to spend a weekend with his son.

  He had told William at the time that he needed to learn how to keep himself under good regulation, while being able to release his desires in a non-compromising manner. Darcy Sr. told him he did not mind him relieving himself, but he needed to be discrete. His father instructed that most assuredly he could not allow someone to walk in on him, as he had done.

  William’s mother had been furious when she learned of it. George later told William that he did not regret the decision. But, thinking back on it now, Darcy remembered the hormonal young boy that was taught the arts of pleasuring a woman. He did not regret having that education when he was a teenage boy. When he thought of Elizabeth, part of him wished that he could come to their marriage bed as innocent as she. He did not want any son of his to learn lessons in such a way.

  Oh, yes, he had been prepared well in the arts of pleasuring a woman. He had been taught ways of bringing a woman to a level of arousal in which she would welcome his carnal ministrations, and not simply tolerate or attempt to avoid them; although it had certainly been a while since he had practiced this knowledge. To be honest, other than the time with the courtesan, there had only been two other courtesans, and they while on his grand tour.

  Darcy had never wanted to toy with an innocent. His father had instilled in him the responsibility of avoiding a compromising situation. Pemberley and his family reputation were too important to him.

  He learned as a teenager how to keep himself in good regulation amongst company when aroused. When he was young his family and friends often teased him about how much time he spent gazing out of windows, but this was what worked for him. Exposing his arousal to an innocent was simply not done in polite company. But not even in his teenage years had Darcy been as aroused as he was around one Elizabeth Bennet.

  He had also learned how to prolong an erection for longer than he had ever imagined, so he could assure his lady of being thoroughly aroused and finding her pleasure once, if not several times, before he took his own.

  Darcy had spent the majority of his evening the night before, improving his own mind and refreshing his own skills by the extensive reading of a text his cousin Richard had sent him with his recent letter. Richard had sent him the English translation of a book written in India. It was also illustrated. Richard had inscribed the inside cover with ‘May your truly ENJOY marriage, dear cousin. Richard’

  Truth be known, Darcy was quite grateful for the gift. He had a little less than a week to slowly initiate Elizabeth into the joy of intimacy. He would have to go slowly, just a little step each day; but he had a plan. He was thoroughly looking forward to moving forward with a carefully planned strategy this very morning.

  As he was approaching the bounds of Longbourn, he saw that Elizabeth was already there.

  “Good morning, dearest, you look quite stunning this morning,” stated Darcy with utter conviction.

  “Good morning to you, William. You are looking quite handsome yourself.” She smiled so sweetly it filled his heart with utter joy.

  “I take it you are better this morning than the last two,” as he took hold of both of her hands. He lifted one hand and then the other to place a kiss on the back of each. Then he turned them over to kiss the inside wrist on one hand and then the other. And then, to her amazement and shock, he took one hand and kissed the inside of her hand and then lightly traced a circle in her palm with his tongue. He then repeated it on the other hand.

  Her breathing increased, and her countenance flushed bright pink so quickly, it took her by surprise. She cocked her head slightly to the side and raised her eyebrow, and with the quietest of voices but a smile on her face she said, “Was this part of today’s lesson, sir?”

  Darcy gazed deep into her eyes, “Most assuredly, my dear.” His ebony pools bored into her emerald depths. They just gazed at each other. Their smiles started small, but grew and grew until Darcy laughed and Elizabeth giggled. “Let us walk, my Lizzy.”

  As he began to escort her down the path, Darcy stated rather than asked, “I thought we would return to our glen today.”

  “Very well, kind sir.” They talked of nothing and everything that might be important to the other as they walked. Darcy ended up telling her of her dowry, as well as their fathers’ friendship. Elizabeth, while very surprised, found herself beginning to understand why her father had handled their impropriety the way that he had.

  He had accomplished what he had intended. She was relaxed; no tension seemed present in her body. She was laughing, and her countenance was oh, so bright. She appeared happier in his presence than he could have ever dared hope. When they came to the glen, she assured him that she had never happened upon anyone there. They sat upon the log, Elizabeth quite close to him as
she gazed up into his eyes.

  Darcy moved the back of his fingers down her cheek, looking into her eyes, “My love, I have thought a great deal about what you revealed to me yesterday, and as we have seven days before our wedding, I hope to be able to answer most of your questions and lessen as many of your fears as I can. I want you to know I have heard from some of my friends after they married, that while some of their wives do experience pain, many others do not. The secret, I will tell you, appears to lie with the husband; so it will be my job to bring YOU pleasure. It can be a wonderful experience for both of us; and I want you to trust me when I say my greatest hope is that you feel an immense sense of joy and delight.”

  “What did you feel when I kissed your wrist and your palm this morning? I particularly noted a strong reaction when I did this.” He took her hand in his and began to draw circles with his tongue in her palm. Almost immediately, Elizabeth started breathing deeply. He stopped a moment. “Talk to me, Elizabeth, tell me what you are feeling, or I will stop.” He then began again.

  “Oh, I feel like I have been running. My heart is beating faster, and my blood runs up to my cheeks,” Elizabeth stopped speaking when his tongue began moving up to her wrist, up the inside of her arm, to the bend in her elbow, where he changed to kisses and continued up her arm to the edge of her capped sleeve. He stopped and looked at her.

  “Oh, William, I do not even know how to describe it. What am I feeling? Can you tell me? I feel like I want more. You are not stopping, are you?”

  Darcy lighted chuckled. “Oh, my sweet Elizabeth, no I am not stopping, at least not yet. But to answer your other question, I believe that what you are feeling is the first flush of passion. It is what a man and woman feel for each other, preparing them for marital relations.”