Chapter 13
8 December 1811]
It was a beautiful day for a ride in an open curricle, and Darcy and Elizabeth were grateful for the time alone. As the curricle turned on to the open road, after they had passed through Meryton, Darcy reached over and took Elizabeth’s hand; kissing it first on the back, then on the palm, and then on her wrist. He inter-laced his fingers with hers, and put their joined hands back on the bench. He looked at her out of the corner of his eyes.
“Are you happy today, my love?” Darcy asked.
“William, I do not know of a time I have ever been happier! It is a lovely day, I am with the only man I will ever love, he loves me to distraction, and I am to be married in three days. Happy does not say enough! I think I can safely say that I am also joyful, cheerful and blissful.”
“What about contented, delighted, jovial, exultant, and ecstatic? That is how I feel, Lizzy! I quite agree. Happy does not say enough when I consider how I feel being this close to having you as my bride!” They continued to enjoy their ride in companionable silence for several minutes, until Elizabeth decided to speak again.
“William, father spoke to me yesterday of his connections with your family. Did you not have any idea that he was your godfather when you first arrived here in Meryton? I am still struggling to comprehend that our fathers were best friends.”
“I was as shocked as you when I realized your father was ‘Tom’. My father often spoke of his best friend Tom, as well as some of the antics he and my Uncle Edward and had shared with him when they were young. He talked a great deal about their time at Eton and Cambridge. He even spoke to me about some of their adventures on their Grand Tour. I have to admit, remembering some of the things my father told me about Tom--now recognizing them to be about your father--have left me a little embarrassed.“
“William, what did he tell you of my father?”
“Well, about their many adventures. They were both bachelors at the time.”
“What kind of adventures, William? Do you think their adventures involved ladies?”
“Lizzy, you do not really want to know about the intimate life of your father, now do you? My father never shared specific details with me. He just gave me some warnings from time to time. Particularly, before I departed for my grand tour after Cambridge.”
“And did you have many adventures, William? Adventures with ladies?” She turned sideways to look at him, a little unsure of herself, and a little scared of what he might tell her if she were being honest with herself.
Darcy did not respond.
"William, did we not agree to be honest with each other. I do not believe you are uneducated in the ways of love. Can you not tell me?"
"I cannot."
Lizzy said a little nervously, "Cannot or will not, William?"
"Either… both."
"Please, William. Would it not be helpful for your student to know where her Professor was trained?"
"Lizzy, please!"
Elizabeth became very quiet, and removed her hand from his, looking out at the countryside.
Darcy pulled the curricle off the road and into a clearing. They both remained quiet for a while. Darcy was unsure how to proceed; he would do anything rather than hurt her. Why did I not prepare for her curiosity in regards to my past?
Finally, Darcy reached out to her and pulled her into his chest. They held on to each other for a few minutes. Finally, Darcy loosened his grip and angled her head up until he could look into her eyes.
"Lizzy, if I had it to do over again, I would have waited."
Lizzy did not say anything and attempted to look away, but when she could not she closed her eyes and stayed silent.
Darcy pulled her to his chest and said, “Lizzy, will you not say something?”
“Of course, you have experience… I should have known you would not want… not wish to tell me about your other ladies…”
Lizzy buried her head again into his chest. A couple minutes later he heard her sob. "Oh God, Lizzy, I would do anything other than hurt you. I have never been in love before you, but I will not lie to you--as I promised I would not--and tell you that I am an innocent. Please let me wait and speak to you of this after we are married. For the time being, know that it has been many years, and not since I went on my Grand Tour."
"But you will tell me?”
“After we are married,” he said softly, but firmly.
Then Darcy gently placed his hands on both sides of her face. Gazing into her eyes, he wiped away her tears with his thumbs, kissing each lid as it closed on her fine eyes. Then he moved to her slightly open mouth, and felt himself being pulled into her as he kissed her deeply, assuring her of his love.
They held each other for a few minutes, and then after another quick kiss, William pulled the curricle back onto the road.
Reluctantly, Elizabeth accepted that the topic was over… for the time being, anyway.
After several minutes, Lizzy changed the subject, “My father told me he was at your parents wedding, that he was at Pemberley when you were born, as well as at your christening. William, do you know what happened? Do you know why they lost touch? I confess I am very curious. I know my father well, it does not make sense that he would just lose touch with his godson,” Lizzy questioned.
“I am not sure myself. But if I had to guess, I would suspect it has something to do with my Aunt Catherine. I am quite grateful that your father spoke with her when she was here, and not you.”
Darcy paused. He did not know whether to tell her what he suspected might have happened. From Darcy’s interview with his aunt in London, he knew his aunt had spoken very unkind things to Mr. Bennet.
He looked over at her and she quietly said, “William, whatever you say is alright. I know it is the feelings of your aunt, and not yourself.”
“Elizabeth, I do not know what happened. But I do know that my aunt tried to convince my mother and father to set a marriage contract for a union between myself, and my cousin Anne. I would never have married her. It was not my wish nor Anne’s, but Aunt Catherine desired it even before she had a child. Consequently, not too long after Anne was born, Aunt Catherine visited Pemberley.
“Something may have happened when I was very young, or maybe even during one of your father’s visits to Pemberley. I truly do not know.
“My father always told me that he wanted to be sure I married for love, and I wanted that as well. That is why I have remained single as long as I have.” Darcy looked over at Elizabeth. “If I could not marry for love, I would not marry at all. Gratefully, my father always supported my feelings.
“But my mother, I believe, came to believe that if a marriage happened between Anne and myself, it would be good for the family. She mentioned it to me several times before she died.
“I do not know if your father has spoken of this with you or not,” he chuckled. “According to what he told me the other day, he and my father had always wished that their houses would be united. They were so close that they wished to become family, and hoped I would marry one of your father’s children. Any time my mother and Aunt Catherine would talk about my marrying one of her children, your father and my father would say that one of Tom’s children would marry me. It became quite the joke from what your father mentioned the other day.”
“So our fathers desired this match, and hoped for it so long ago? Your father would be happy for us, William?” Elizabeth asked.
“Oh, I believe he would be very happy!”
“What about your mother?”
“I am not as sure about my mother. My Aunt Catherine pursued the ‘connection’ of the Darcy and de Bourgh families relentlessly. She was determined in her pursuit. My mother was taught to believe you should marry for wealth and connections.
“Lizzy, your father is such a kind man, I respect him very much. He may choose to tell us, or he may not. I do not recommend we press him on the matter. He seems quite happy to have me back in his life. He seems happier still,
that I am to be his son-in-law. I can tell you, however, that in my father’s last hours, he thought of your father. He asked that if I ever met his friend Tom, to tell him he loved him and that he was sorry.”
“Oh, William! I am so sorry you lost your mother and father. But, it is difficult to contemplate that your mother may not have approved of me,” Elizabeth had tears running down her cheeks, and as they were out in the middle of open road he pulled the curricle over again and stopped it. He pulled her into his arms and tucked her head into his chest.
“Oh, Elizabeth, do not be sad. I know my father would be happy. I would like to think that if my mother met you, she would love you as much as I do. We both now know you are not without money as so many believed, and not without connections as your father and my uncle have remained friends all this time. You are marrying your father’s Godson, who just happens to be a Darcy. So you have connections and wealth my dear. Most of all, you have the love of this less than perfect, passionately besotted man,” he tipped her chin up to look at him, and wiping her eyes with his fingers, he gave her a chaste kiss this time.
“Is that the only kiss I am to receive now, sir?” she said in her impertinent way.
“That is all you may have on the open road. But we will find the time and place for more before this day is over, I assure you,” Darcy said.
“I will count on that, my love,” Elizabeth said with a slight smile.
*~*~*~*~*
When Lord Matlock was announced, Mr. Bennet was surprised as he had only just finished reading his express. Now here he was!
“Edward, you do not know how wonderful it is to see you again!” Tom Bennet said as he enthusiastically shook Edward Fitzwilliam’s hand.
“The feeling is mutual, old friend. I could not help it! I came on horseback, ahead of the rest of the party. I was longing for a little private conversation before the rest of the party descends upon us. Where is your lovely daughter, Tom? Is she with Fitzwilliam?”
Tom led him back to his library and offered him a drink. The gentleman gratefully accepted.
“I sent them on an errand today,” Tom answered. “You will remember I purchased the Great House at Stoke several years ago. I took it so Fanny and the girls would not be ‘turned out into the hedgerows’, as Fanny puts it, should I depart this earth prior to her. I wanted them to have a place to live, and the place has paid for itself with the income from the tenants. I have recently been contemplating what to do with it, and have considered leasing it. I asked Fitzwilliam to look over the estate for me before he departs on his honeymoon, and give me his opinion. They left in my curricle several hours ago.
“Because Elizabeth knows her mother’s taste, and her constant complaints, I encouraged her to go along.”
“Tom, do you think it wise to send them off alone?” Edward questioned.
“Well, they rode in the open curricle… They appear quite content and happy together, Edward. It is a love match, which I know would have pleased George.”
“I am quite happy for Fitzwilliam. The family has been concerned about him since George’s death. He became so serious and consumed with learning how to manage the estate, and caring for Georgiana. He has had little time to think about himself, and even less time to think of marriage. I dare say, from what you have told me of your Elizabeth over the years, they must be very well matched.”
“Edward, I think they are perfect for each other. Fitzwilliam needs some liveliness in his life, and my Elizabeth would never have been happy without someone who would appreciate her spirit, her wit, and her intelligence. I know of very few men that could match wits with her. I dare say, I have already seen Darcy best her. They shall never be bored, that is for sure.”
“I am very happy for you. To have been re-united with your godson, and have him matched with your daughter, must be a great triumph indeed. How went your interview with my sister? I dare say she was ‘most seriously displeased,’” laughed Edward.
“I enjoyed the opportunity of one-upping your ignoble sister at least once in this lifetime, Edward. Will she make trouble for them, do you think?”
“I have already spoken with her on the subject, Tom. I did not demand she come to the wedding, but I have forbidden her to say or do anything that will hurt the family. I still control her estate; she would not be so foolish as to defy me.” He looked at his friend of long-standing. “After all these years, Tom, we will now be family.”
Mr. Bennet refilled their glasses with port, “What say you then, to Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth?” Tom raised his glass in toast, and Edward joined him.
“Your express arrived just this morning,” Tom chuckled. “Did you want me to have some time to think of the news before we spoke of it?”
Edward laughed, “Yes, I wanted to be sure you had time to contemplate the demise of your ridiculous cousin! Can you believe he came to such an end?”
Tom chuckled, “I cannot say I grieve him. Are you aware he made an offer to Lizzy? Fitzwilliam walked into the room as he was attempting to get her to reconsider her resounding ‘no’ to his request.”
“Good God, Tom; could he have really thought she would consider him?”
“It appears he thought she would. Although, I am sorry to say my wife may have had a hand in the matter. She has long feared being turned out of this house.”
“Does Fanny or anyone else in the family know of Collins’ demise?”
“There are several pieces of news I must dispense in the next couple days. I am grateful for a little time to discuss them with you. Fanny does not know of my income. I, at times, think I have been quite selfish in concealing it from her, Edward. I wanted to have adequate dowries for all my daughters, and take care of her in my demise. I fear if she knows the truth of my wealth, she will overspend my income.
“At one point, I envisioned she would demand we move to a large estate, decorate it in some garish fashion, and I would no longer know myself. But sometimes I think that in not telling her, I may have left her to her fears, and those fears have driven her nerves into agitation,” he confessed.
“Well, she must have less fear in having your second daughter so well-situated. Even if your income was not as it is, I know that Fitzwilliam would aid your family. That alone may remove her fear, Tom.”
“I do believe it shall not be long before I have another suitor come to claim my eldest daughter. If William had not been rushed into it, I dare say his best friend Bingley may have beat him to my door. As it is, I would suspect he is waiting until Darcy and Elizabeth are married, in order not to detract from their nuptials.”
Edward questioned, “Tom, what do you mean by being rushed into it?”
“Ah, so I did not share that part of the story with you in my letter?” and Mr. Bennet proceeded to tell him about the events of the Netherfield Ball, those that had led to Darcy and Elizabeth’s understanding.
“They do not appear to be forced into a marriage you say?” Edward asked.
“No, not at all. They appear very much in love, and happy with the turn of events. Their affection appears to grow each day. I do believe that Fitzwilliam is currently ‘courting’ Lizzy in order to assure greater felicity in their marriage. Perhaps I should have done more of that myself…” he said with sadness in his voice.
“Tom, are you all right? Do you still feel regret after all this time?” Edward asked.
“Edward, to be honest, there is not a day that I do not think about her at some point. If I had been more bold, if I had asked to court her first, if…”
Edward cut him off, “Is it not time to let the regret go, Tom? I know you loved her. But that was a long time ago. It is time to let it go. Time to love the family that God has given you. Now you have Fitzwilliam coming into your family. Does that not give you some peace?”
“It does bring me some peace. It binds me back to my friend, George. Fitzwilliam told me he spoke of me in his last hours, Edward. George told him if he ever met me to tell me he loved me and he was sorry!�
� Tom exclaimed.
“I know the break with George was hard on you,” Edward asked.
Tom continued, “It was hard, excruciatingly hard. But it was equally difficult to let go of my best friend. You know over the years, you have replaced him, my dear friend.”
“Thank you, Tom. I treasure all the times that you, George, and I had together. I am grateful you have kept in touch with me over all these years. I have not told you ’til now, but George knew that we kept in touch, and was always eager for word of you. You know he loved you like a brother,” Edward stated.
“I could not have had truer friends than George and yourself. For that I am quite grateful. I would never have made my fortune without your and Darcy’s guidance. I thank you my friend!
“I have one last question for you. I know that Fitzwilliam, and now Lizzy as I have told her some of my relationship with your family, wonder how George and I came to be estranged. What shall I tell them, Edward?” Tom asked with all sincerity.
“Well Tom, Fitzwilliam knows of his aunt’s machinations, as he has been subject to them these many years. She has long tried to force him to marry her Anne. He has evaded her over and over, but she has continued to believe he would finally relent. I think the simple answer, and the one you told George, is acceptable. That it appeared your presence was causing conflict in the Darcy household, and you decided it was best to stay away. Tell Fitzwilliam you have always kept track of his life through me. It might be just a half truth, but I think it is enough.”
“Thank you, my friend. Wise advise indeed. May I freshen your drink?” And then the conversation changed to more mundane topics until they picked up the chessboard for a game.
*~*~*~*~*
Darcy and Elizabeth arrived at the entrance to the Great House at Stoke a little over an hour after they had left Longbourn. The drive to the gate appeared to be well maintained. The gate, while not being garish, spoke well for keeping the non-intended off the property. Darcy stopped, opened the gate, and entered. Both were well pleased with the prospect… The park appeared to be well maintained, even though no one was currently living there. A fountain rested in front of the entrance. In the centre was a statue of Adonis, and Elizabeth teased Darcy that it reminded her of him. There was a circle drive in front of the house, and off to the left was a notched roof stable. Darcy drove the curricle down there to unhitch the horses, allowing them to rest in the stable and eat, as there was hay available. With very little effort he located the supplies, left the horses to rest, and returned to escort his fiancée to the front of the house.
White Lies and Other Half Truths Page 13
