B007P4V3G4 EBOK

by Richard Huijing

When the king had spoken his proudest words, the curtain came down but it had to rise at once again.

  Loud cheering resounded throughout the auditorium.

  'Oh, what a king!' they cried and a sobbing young lady shouted: 'Ecstasy!'

  The king was left staring gloomily ahead of himself. He had seen how the governor of the province had risen to applaud the artiste, that the mayor was beside himself with admiration and that many dignitaries were still nodding satisfaction, long after the curtain had come down.

  'So this is majesty? he thought. 'Is this the way my people want their king to And will I ever be able to learn this, what is thought to be fine and regal? I tire quickly, I have never bothered with gymnastics and my mouth is much smaller than this man's.'

  Then he heard a nice young girl say: 'This one's quite different from that creep yesterday! He is the spitting image of the king He really could pass for his brother.'

  'Indeed,' agreed a neighbour.

  This surprised the king highly, and with longing he awaited the second act to see this curious likeness for himself.

  The second act, too, enraptured the audience to great admiration but only in the third did enthusiasm rise properly to its peak.

  In the final scenes, the actor gave himself completely. His glorious delivery sounded as tireless as at the beginning, his hair whirled wildly around his head, he made the robe wave about like the gown of a belly-dancer and he twisted his body into many contortions.

  'Delicious! Masterly!' were the cries.

  The rolling r's, the penetrating i's and the clear a's were of wondrous effect.

  'God save the king!' cried many in the galleries, and when the play had ended, people were loath to leave the auditorium.

  'Well7' asked De Man, when the king entered the dressing room. 'Have you now seen what a king is?'

  'It was an overwhelming success,' said the king, 'but forgive me for daring to make an observation. Weren't your movements a touch frantic for a dignified prince?'

  The actor laughed: 'Are you now trying to teach me how a king behaves?!'

  And to the fat father, ridding himself huffing and puffing of his stockings, he said: 'The man hasn't the slightest notion of physical expression! What did you think of it?'

  I always think it's tremendous!' was the reply, but the father could say no more for a servant was just bringing in the platter with one of his favourite dishes.

  Now many people in fine gala attire came to pay the artist their respects. In the foul-smelling room, past bowls of dirty water in which floated thick tufts of hair, they moved about with relish.

  Modestly, the king retired behind a curtain and heard one of the gentlemen, in whom, by his voice, he recognised the governor of the province at once, say with conviction: 'Mr De Man, Sir, you are a splendid being! You could even teach our king a lesson or two.'

  Then the king removed himself.

  Once outside, he hastened his step.

  The cold of night did not bother him. A lovely warm feeling had taken possession of him. He could have sung with joy.

  Far outside of town, he turned round. He raised his hands high, and proudly his voice resounded: 'Starrrs, shine down on thy king forrr whom the mysterrry has been solved.'

  The stars twinkled in the sky. The cows lowed in the fields.

  Proud, he made his regal progress to his palace.

  The guards at the gilded gate did not recognise him at once, so strange was his bearing, and in the marble corridors the lavishly gold-adorned footmen stared at him in great surprise.

  It seemed as if the king had grown larger. The indifference had vanished from his features. His chest puffed out, head thrown back, one hand by his side, the other stretched out commandingly in front of him, fingers spread wide, his heels stamping on the mosaic floors, he made the impression of one ostentatiously proclaiming his dignity.

  His eyebrows were gathered in a frown, his eyes glinted and strong-willed furrows outlined his mouth.

  The old duty-chamberlain who had fallen asleep in the hall in front of the royal bedchamber, tired from days of waiting, was gravely startled by his thunderous voice. The crystals in the chandeliers glittering in the morning sun tinkled.

  The pikemen at the doors rushed forward and the king's favourite dogs gave tongue.

  A smile passed around the king's lips and with impressive stateliness he proceeded solemnly past the startled individuals into his bedchamber.

  There, he laid himself down to rest in an impeccable, physically expressive attitude and, while he slept, the tiding went from mouth to mouth in a whisper: 'The king's returned but he seems almost intoxicated.'

  When finally, after a long wait, the stroke of a gong announced the king's order to approach to the softly conversing ministers, they, curious, went to pay their respects.

  They did not find him in his housecoat sitting listlessly at the golden table, like on other days, but strong-willed, upright, fists clenched on the armrests of his Florentine chair. He sat there, legs wide, broad in his coronation robes draped in elegant folds, a crown of golden laurel leaves on his curiously coiffed hair, his head thrown back haughtily.

  So much did his altered appearance surprise them that they remained bunched together at the entrance to the room, staring at him.

  This pleased the king greatly.

  'Apprrroach, my Lorrrds, apprrroach,' he commanded, and on the features of these highly surprised ones, his eyes sought out the effect of the distinguished sound of his words.

  Slowly, the ministers approached but remained carefully bunched together.

  'You arrre surrrprrrised,' said the king, 'fearrrful, prrrobably, because we seem alterrred to you.'

  'Oh, no, Your Majesty,' the ministers stammered.

  Then, with broad gestures, the king stepped up to them; his brow wrinkled, his eyes rolled wildly beneath his fearsomely bunched up eyebrows and in a tremendous voice he roared:

  'Do not lie, odious crrreaturrres! We have become a differrrent perrrson. Werrre we in times past merrrely king by birrrth, today we arrre this deliberrrately, thrrrough knowledge of life and the superrriorrrity of ourrr perrrsonal genius. The days spent by us in grrrave and weighty study have perrrforrrmed a wondrrrous metamorrrphosis upon us. Frrrom now on, we arrre king with rrroyal allurrre! Yourrr unrrrefined gesturrres displease us grrreatly! What seems strrrange to you in ourrr charrracterrr is the neverrr demonstrrrated essence of trrruly rrregal rrroyalty. Teach yourrrselves to move exprrressively! Learrrn thrrrough us the corrrrrrrect prrronunciation of the worrrd. Study yourrr a's, yourrr e's, and arrrticulate the rrr's with distinction. Frrrom now on, ourrr courrrt will exude trrrue rrroyal rrrefinement!'

  Then the king made a splendid gesture. He drew himself up tall, pointed wrathfully at the richly decorated doors and waited until their surprised excellencies had disappeared, their backs hunched.

  Following this, without altering the expression on his face, he went to the huge full-length mirror and studied the distinguished impression he must have made on the wisest men in his realm.

  The ministers, once outside, rushed, their backs hunched, to their own council chamber, closed the doors there circumspectly, stretched themselves to the length befitting ordinary human dignity, patted their ears in which the many fierce sounds uttered by the king still rang and regarded each other, smiling.

  'Priceless,' the prime minister spoke first, and instantly the others dared to hoot with laughter.

  They deliberated in hushed voices for a long time. One brought up the suspicion that someone had intoxicated the king's mind with a mysterious poison, another irreverently suspected His Majesty of overindulgence in drink, a third let it be known that in his opinion they were dealing with a case of One being of unsound mind, but all were in agreement that the actions of the monarch were exceptionally amusing and each time they reminded one another of the details of his poses, the laughter became uncontrollable.

  'Oh the prime minister said at last, trying to force his face,
once again, into the grave creases befitting his office: Wisdom or folly, it is our conviction that we must co-operate with the king and therefore I don't believe that this attitude will be a permanent one. His Majesty, doubtless, was jesting, but,' and he placed special emphasis on the word 'but', 'we must not take this jest with too much mirth. We must watch over decorum. I myself shall acquaint Her Majesty the Queen with what has taken place:

  Then the sound of many trumpets sounded through the corridors of the palace.

  The king was going to display himself to his people. Already the guardsmen's horses were stamping and pawing in the forecourt. Outriders in red uniforms jigged up and down, soldiers in glinting cuirasses controlled the gawp-happy populace that had poured in, in droves, and a general stood motionless, sabre drawn, ready to salute the king.

  They expected the king dressed in simple clothes as usual, but he appeared on the high dais cloaked in an ermine robe.

  He bore a golden staff in his hand and he bore a crown of laurel leaves on his neatly crimped hair.

  The ovation the people gave him was, for this reason, of exceptionally long duration. But the king did not make his way immediately to his coach as usual. He remained on the steps to his palace, waiting, the way he had seen the actor do the night before, until the people had grown tired of cheering, then to make royal gestures on the marble elevation.

  He extended his robe widely, stretching out his hand with the sceptre toward the sky, and his face showed the expression of the most regal possible pride.

  The people, surprised at his movements, watched with bated breath, and by this silence the king understood that he was being highly admired. He repeated the gestures therefore; he shrouded himself in the ermine, raised himself on tip-toe, suddenly let the robe drop, brought his hand to his chin, stared into the void, remained motionless a moment only then to move again most elegantly. He twirled round a few times, stared at the sky, peered over the heads of the people at the fields, greeted the entire surroundings with wide-spread arms and stepped, now on tip-toe, then stomping his heels, towards his gilded coach.

  The people were more and more surprised. Never had a king been seen like this before and when, slowly driving by, he looked at his subjects with adoringly staring eyes, they thought the expression on his face so extraordinary that they pressed round his state-coach as though he were a jolly fair-ground quack instead of the inaccessible bearer of authority.

  The pikemen had difficulty in keeping the people at bay. Wildly, the people thronged closer.

  The king, egged on by their enthusiasm, displayed his most splendid poses of all. He rose from his seat, made countless elegant waves of the arms, shook his tresses, twinkled with his fingers, grimly contorted his mouth only to smile amiably again instantly, whipping up the people to ever greater boisterousness.

  The roar of the crowd could be heard streets away, and the city's population ran in huge throngs to meet the curious procession.

  A fierce crush arose: horses reared up on to their hind legs, people ended up underfoot and the king went on with his physically expressive until the people could no longer be contained. They broke the ranks of soldiers, opened the carriage and forced him to go into the crowd.

  This gave him a shock.

  People embraced him, wanted to induce him to dance and they cheered in a disgracefully irreverent manner.

  Pale and unnerved, he suddenly understood how much his dignity had been damaged. He wished to free himself of the embraces but he got stuck in the crush.

  Cuirassiers had to relieve him.

  Sabres unsheathed, they hacked their way into the multitude now running amok.

  In a distraught condition, the king reached his palace. Faithful retainers led him to his apartments and in his bedchamber, burying his pale face in his trembling hands, he sank down on to his bed.

  With reverent gentleness they relieved him of his torn robes, asked in hushed voices for his orders but he did not stir. For the second time the shameful feeling of humiliation oppressed him. It was as if his throat was being pinched shut and the blood throbbed at his temples.

  His head pressed deep into the spotless pillows, he could still smell the vile smells of the people and, trembling, he could still feel their rough touch. Through his closed eyelids he saw cheeky grinning faces and his ears were filled with noise, buzzing.

  They let him be, and knowing himself to be safe in the silence at last, he dared to move.

  Then he roused himself, went over to his chair by the window where he had felt doubt for the first time and, staring, he looked out into the darkening beyond.

  The queen entered by the door, pushed open softly, and approached with small, careful steps.

  'My poor Lord,' she said, and her voice sounded so intensely compassionate that tears welled up in the king's eyes.

  'My poor she repeated and at once she pressed his hand tenderly. Why art thou so imprudent to display thyself to the people when thou hast taken too much wine7'

  The king did not defend himself for he did not wish to speak to her of his doubt, but when the queen had departed he called for the old Councillor of State who had been his first teacher. To him he confessed his adventures. And the old Councillor said:

  'I, too, after the full, carefree years of my youth, have attempted in the first period of reflection to assay my self-worth. By appearances I sought to give myself more esteem, but life taught me that we are what we are; never more, never less, and it taught me that, by wishing to achieve more than one is able to, one can only succeed in humiliating oneself.

  'Thou art called king, but thou canst not elevate thyself to royal kingship through acts of outward display.

  Time shall pronounce judgement.

  'Be thyself, and if thou art of royal quality this shall be evident by thy true deeds. When thou sought'st to bring reality to the realm of appearances, thou wast ridiculous. Ridiculous, too, wast thou when thou sought'st to hand victory to appearances in real life.

  'Should the actor, acclaimed and lauded as make-believe king in the realm of make-believe reality, wish to play the same part in the real world, he would be as preposterous as thou wast on his stage.

  'This is the first pre-condition for he who wishes to be a balanced human being and seeks to make a success of his life: ask not the why of things, accept the things the way they are, and act simply, with honest conviction, according to circumstances:

  When, after a year had past, the king had grown calm again, he ordered Karel de Man's theatrical company to attend court.

  The celebrated artiste came at once and was received in special audience. The star, who now acted very modestly, barely dared look up at the monarch, but when he did so his eyes acquired a deeply thoughtful expression.

  'Tell us what you are thinking,' said the king. We demand that you should tell.'

  'Your Majesty,' was the hesitant reply, I thought of a ... forgive me, pray, Your Majesty; I once knew a rich man who believed himself capable of personifying a king. He resembled Your Majesty so much that at first

  'And was he regal?'

  'Begging Your Majesty's pardon, he was an upstart Mr Average. Only his face resembled yours but in his manner, bearing and expressions he was annoying, but conceited he was to a high degree.'

  'Are you quite sure we were not that man?'

  The actor grew fearful of having said too much.

  He stammered: No, Your Majesty ... for I should recognise you amongst thousands by the majesty of your person.'

  And the king gleaned from his eyes that he was speaking the truth.

  That evening, Karel de Man acted in his most powerful play but, though giving the best he was capable of, he could not manage to make more of it than a modest success.

  That same governor who once had applauded him warmly, that same mayor who had ridiculed the king, those same dignitaries who had praised him once loudly, thought him, now they knew themselves to be in the king's presence, a ridiculous prince.

  The
king has thought at length about these contradictions, but he has never reached any clarity in the matter.

  Jan Siebelink

  In his mind, he imagined that the little room filled itself with the racket of his revolver blazing away, that cracks ran like dark rivers through the glass of the mirror and that both of them, he and the woman, fell apart in shards ... With a smile on his serious, contorted face, he listened to the reverberation of the tumult above their destroyed bodies which had remained intact nevertheless. The smile vanished, his hand slid along the bedspread hanging down to the ground, sweat forced its way out from his forehead.

  A few years ago, Van Baak had entered an ironmonger's shop and had stood a long time looking at a showcase sealed with a padlock, at the rear of the shop, in which firearms of many kinds were displayed. He had just made his so-manieth visit to the sexologist ... 'Allow your imagination to wander a bit, let it do the real work, and do take plenty of He knew in advance that it wouldn't work out, but the doctor acted very busy, made telephone calls, rinsed bottles, walked to and fro, washed his hands at length: all actions undertaken with the intention of distracting him so he would not get the feeling that the doctor was waiting for him, was expecting something from him. His mind had to be trained 'lightly' on the sex act, so 'lightly' in fact that the success of that act would not seem of the slightest importance ... 'Close your eyes! It stimulates the imagination and gives you But he did not close his eyes; from behind the plastic curtain he followed with revulsion the grotesque shadow of the doctor; that particular time he got an erection; its cause did not lie in the evocation of the sharply defined image of a lascivious woman. The busy doctor irritated him boundlessly. Chill anger crept up inside him; if I had a revolver now, he suddenly thought, I'd wrench open the curtain and then, him, I'd ... Calmly, he slid open the curtain; the doctor turned round, smiled, rubbed his hands and said: 'You see: perseverance's the thing!' With his index finger he tested the hardness; Van Baak looked at the nail which was smooth and pink with fine spots of calcium.

  'Splendid!' the doctor added. But under the caressing finger and the approving gaze, his sex withered.