The imPERFECT Guy

by Leddy Harper

  When I pulled down the street, following Mady’s directions, I nearly swallowed my tongue. Cars lined both sides, and apparently, we hadn’t even made it to the house yet. I slowed to a stop in the middle of the road and turned to face Mady. “Please don’t tell me all these people are here for your uncle’s party.”

  A sheepish grin curled her lips, giving away her answer.

  “You’ve got to be kidding me!” I dropped my head into my palms, and for the first time in years, I wished I had longer hair to pull. My hands fell heavily into my lap as I slowly swung my gaze back to my passenger. “You told me it would only be a few of your family members.”

  Wide, golden eyes stared back at me in feigned confusion. “What? These are only the ones who live nearby. At least half my relatives live too far away and couldn’t make it.”

  “Mady! There’s got to be a hundred people here!”

  “I’m Italian, Finn,” she said, as if I should’ve assumed she was related to half the town simply because of her heritage.

  “Let me guess…you have a cousin named Vinny, too.” It was meant as a joke, though the laughter on my lips died before making any sound when she lifted one shoulder in a timid shrug.

  “Like I said, Finn…I’m Italian. There’s also a Bernie, a few Tonys—Anthony, Antonio, and, of course, my uncle, Tony. As well as an Angelo, Giovanni, Matteo, Lorenzo…”

  “Yeah, yeah. I get it.” Fuck. I would be smart to never call anyone by their name, considering there was no way to keep them all straight. I let off the brake and slowly crept down the street again, looking for a spot to park. The houses in this neighbor were quite large, leading me to ask, “What does your uncle do for a living?”

  “Oh, he’s retired, but he used to work in waste management.”

  My chest grew tighter, making breathing difficult. “What are you going to tell me next, that your family’s in the mob?”

  She giggled and shook her head, allowing me to fill my lungs with air. But then she said, “Of course I wouldn’t tell you that, Finn. No one speaks of it. And it’s mafia, not mob.” Her laughter got louder when I slammed on the brakes. She pressed her hand to her chest, as if to calm herself, and then turned in her seat to face me. “I’m fucking with you. My family are normal, everyday people.”

  Yeah, we’ll see about that.

  Luckily, there was an empty space close to the house, just big enough for my Tahoe. At least I wouldn’t have to meet her parents covered in sweat after walking a million miles from my car to the front door. I’d only be mildly perspiring, thanks to Mady ambushing me with her gigantic Italian family who may or may not be part of the mafia.

  I slammed into a wall of loud voices as soon as Mady opened the front door. I couldn’t even tell where they were all coming from, other than echoing off the marble tile and high ceilings. Several young kids came out of nowhere and ran around my legs, almost causing me to trip and fall. Then they scurried off into some other part of the house, all while I continued to follow Mady to my execution.

  The aroma that filled the air assured me that I’d at least get a last meal before disappearing, never to be seen again. And for a second, I wondered how long it would take my own family to realize I’d gone missing. That was a depressing thought.

  Mady stopped and hugged her sister. I’d never met her before, but I’d seen her pictures all over Mady’s house. In fact, I probably could’ve picked out her parents too, if there weren’t a million people here.

  “Gia, this is Finn. Finn, this is my sister, Gia.” Mady pointed between us in an introduction.

  “It’s nice to finally meet you, Finn.” Gia was younger than Mady by two years, but seeing them next to one another, they could’ve been twins. They wore their hair the same, had very similar eye color, and their noses were identical. But she didn’t have Mady’s smile. I couldn’t pinpoint what was different about it, but when I saw it, it didn’t do to me what Mady’s did.

  I gave her a quick hug and said, “I’ve heard so much about you.”

  She cut her eyes to her sister and pulled her lips to the side. “Funny, because I haven’t heard very much about you.” She may have been talking to me, but her words were directed at Mady. It was like they were sharing secrets through their eyes.

  I couldn’t imagine what that was like, being so close to someone that we could communicate without words.

  “Don’t lie.” Mady playfully smacked her sister’s arm. “I’ve told you lots about him.”

  “Good things, I hope,” I said, speaking up in case they forgot I was still standing there.

  Gia laughed, which was the second significant difference between the two. “Maybe for you. I swear sometimes she forgets that I used to assist her when she goes on and on about how good you are and all you’re doing to help her build her name.”

  “Oh, uh…I’m sorry.” I had no idea what to say to that.

  “It’s fine. I’m just grateful that she’s found someone who can dedicate more time to her than I could. And I’m thrilled that it’s all working out. I’ve got to say, though…I was a bit worried when she first told me about you. Working so closely with someone of the opposite sex can get a little hairy, but it’s good to know that those lines aren’t being blurred.”

  I began to cough uncontrollably, which turned out to be a blessing in disguise, because it made Mady lead me to the kitchen for some water. Although, I learned very quickly that I was simply trading one disaster for another.

  Thirty minutes later, I followed Mady to the back yard. I honestly didn’t think I’d ever make it out of the mob of women in the kitchen—at least, not alive. I’d now officially met a few of her aunts, several female cousins, and some lady named Paula—who pinched my cheeks, and when I turned around, she grabbed my ass. I still wasn’t sure how she fit in with the family. Now we were on our way to meet the men. I couldn’t help but wish I was back with Gia, talking about blurred lines. That would’ve been so much easier than meeting any of her male relatives.

  “Madelynn! It’s about time you showed up!” A large man with salt-and-pepper hair wrapped his massive arms around her, pulling her into a hug. I assumed this was her uncle, but I wasn’t sure.

  “We’ve actually been here a little while already. We just got hung up in the kitchen.”

  “Ah, yes. Why do you think I stay outside?” They shared a laugh together, then he spotted me and asked, “Who’s your friend?”

  “This is my assistant, Finn. Finn, this is my dad.”

  Out of all the guys in the back yard, and her father just had to be the biggest one.

  Fuck my life.

  “It’s very nice to meet you, Mr. Russo.” I shook his hand, matching his strength as best I could. If there was one thing I knew, it was how to impress a man with a handshake. And my bruised knuckles proved that he’d been taught the same.

  “The name’s Alfonzo.”

  “Well, thank you for inviting me, Alfonzo.”

  His smile dropped as he set his narrowed eyes on me, reminding me very much of Mady. “We’re not pals, you got me? Show some respect, son. It’s Mr. Russo until you get to know me.”

  My mouth opened and closed, only air coming out in place of words. I looked to Mady for help, but she was too busy greeting the others in the group, paying no attention to the last moments of my life on Earth.

  “Ah!” Alfonzo clapped my back, practically knocking the air from my lungs. He then draped his beefy arm over my shoulders, pulling me into his side. “I’m just messing with you. Got to break the ice somehow, am I right?”

  Even if I wanted to answer that, I couldn’t.

  Because I couldn’t speak.

  “Come on, let’s get you something to drink.” He dragged me toward the house, but rather than go inside, he opened the door and called out, “Franny!”

  Seconds later, a familiar voice bellowed from inside, “What, Alfie?” And then an older woman appeared through the slider, wiping her hands on the apron that hung over the skir
t of her dress. “I was cookin’. What do ya want?”

  If I closed my eyes, I’d swear I was listening to Mady, only with a much more prominent accent. They had the same voice, with the same inflections. There was no mistaking that this was her mother.

  “Have you met Madelynn’s friend, Finn?” He pointed to me. “He’s her assistant.”

  “No, I haven’t.” She finished drying her hands on her apron and held one out, which took me by surprise; I was expecting a hug. “Nice to meet you, Finn. I’m Francesca, Mady’s mom.”

  I took her offered hand and gave what could only be described as a subtle bow. I wasn’t sure if things could get much worse, but just to ensure they didn’t, I refrained from calling her anything. “It’s nice to finally meet you, too.”

  “Do me a favor, Franny…Finn would like something to drink.”

  She smiled and asked, “What would you like?”

  Alfonzo clapped me on the back again, and if he continued to do that, I’d end up leaving here with bruised lungs. “We have juice, water, tea, milk, beer, rum, vodka, whiskey—”

  “Water’s fine. Thank you.”

  He pulled away and looked at me funny, as if wildly confused by my answer. “You don’t want a real drink? Franny here knows her way around a liquor cabinet, makes the best mixed drinks you’ll ever have.”

  “No, that’s okay, but thanks. I’m driving, so I’ll just stick with water.”

  Something akin to pride flashed in his eyes right before he turned back to his wife. “Water for the boy, and I’ll take a refill,” he said, holding out an empty scotch glass.

  Francesca disappeared inside while Alfonzo led me back to the group of men on the lawn. He then introduced me to several people whose names I’d never remember. So far, I’d yet to meet her cousin Vinny. Out of everyone here, I was sure I wouldn’t forget him. Although, I’d probably be disappointed if he didn’t look a little like Joe Pesci. Or at the very least, sound like him.

  Mady’s mom came out a few minutes later with our drinks, but she didn’t stay long. And shortly after she left, I noticed that Mady was nowhere to be found. She’d literally fed me to the wolves and then left.

  My time outside was awkward, to say the least. It was obvious none of these men dared to wander inside. They said the women would yell and shoo them out of the kitchen, but I figured it had more to do with “quiet male bonding time,” even though there was nothing quiet about this family. Then again, it was a lot louder in the house with all the kids running around and the women crammed into the kitchen. So I understood, but that didn’t mean I hadn’t tried to come up with excuses to go find Mady.

  Unfortunately, they had a solution for everything. Need more to drink? Franny! Need something to eat to hold me over until dinner? Paula! Need to use the bathroom? Thank God they didn’t have anyone to call for that one. Which was why I used it to escape after almost two hours of casually discussing my role as Mady’s assistant—which we all knew wasn’t as casual as they were making it out to be. They were grilling me, checking me out, but at least they were nice about it. I’d answered all I could, and thanks to the many glasses of water I’d consumed, I excused myself to use the restroom.

  “It’s down the front hall, third door on the left,” one of the men shouted after me as I raced inside.

  Her uncle’s house was enormous on the outside, but inside, it felt so much larger. I’d gone in through a side door rather than the one in the back, so I had absolutely no idea where I was going. And if I didn’t make it to a toilet soon, I’d really leave an impression with her family. As I hurried through the house, dodging kids, I found a hallway and made my way down, except I couldn’t remember which door it was.

  I knew it was on the left, and after checking the first one, I moved on to the second. The door was cracked open, but the light was on, so I lifted my fist to knock, only to be stopped by Mady’s voice. She was either in there with someone or talking on the phone. I almost pushed the door all the way open, but when I heard my name, I paused to listen, disregarding my aching bladder.

  “I’m just so worried, Maria. Knowing my daughter, she hasn’t said anything to him about her disability. How’s he supposed to look after her best interests if he doesn’t know what to do? At least I knew Gia had her back and wouldn’t let her get herself into trouble.”

  Once I realized that it wasn’t Mady but her mother, I should’ve kept walking. Especially after hearing her mention Mady having a disability. That felt too personal to listen to. Although, rather than move on to the next door, I waited around in the hopes of finding out more. If not knowing about her disability could potentially put her in harm’s way, then it couldn’t hurt to stick around to find out how to help her better.

  At least, that was how I justified it to myself.

  “I get it, Franny,” the woman, whom I assumed was Maria, said in a soft, soothing voice. “But that’s her decision. You can’t baby her forever. She needed more help with her business, so she hired someone. This probably won’t be the last time, either. She’s a smart girl, which means she’s aware of the consequences of keeping her dyslexia to herself.”

  I stopped listening, not because I didn’t care, but because all I could think about was Mady having dyslexia. And then, all of a sudden, everything made sense. Always ordering from the list of recited specials instead of choosing something from the menu. Dictating her messages and notes, using text-to-speech to read her emails. Getting my name wrong.

  Closing my eyes, I bit back a groan as I recalled the issues she’d had the first couple of days at the ranch, and how I handled it. She’d told me that her brain got jumbled, yet she’d blamed it on anxiety. I didn’t doubt she suffered from anxiety, except I now believed that it was probably induced by the need to hide her dyslexia.

  God, I’m such an idiot.

  Granted, it wasn’t like I could’ve guessed that simply by the random things she did—things I’d passed off as quirks. And if I truly thought about it, I had to give her credit for being able to hide it so well.

  At least now I knew the truth, even if she hadn’t been the one to tell me.

  I slowly put one foot in front of the other, my bladder screaming for attention. When I made it to the next door, I was too lost in thought to pay any attention to the fact that it was closed. I twisted the knob and pushed it open, making it halfway in before realizing it was occupied.

  13

  Mady

  As I sat on the floor with my back against the wall, I stared at the empty tumbler on the floor next to me. My Aunt Wilma made the best banana coladas; they went down so smooth that it made it hard to keep track of how many I’d had. I told myself—more like lied to myself—that I couldn’t have had more than two, so another wouldn’t hurt.

  I’d finished my second glass within the first hour, but as I sat on the floor in an empty room, that hadn’t seemed too long ago. Alcohol made it a lot easier to lie to myself, and I wondered why I didn’t indulge more often.

  I wasn’t a very big drinker, but having Finn around my family made me want to pour liquor down my throat until I woke up the next day with no memory of this entire event. And considering I hadn’t had anything to eat yet, there was a good chance my wish would come true.

  Just as I was about to pull myself off the floor, determined to get one more colada in before dinner, I was stopped by voices in the hallway. They were too muffled to hear much other than a girly shriek, followed by “oh my God” and a male mumbling something in return. Someone else spoke up, but again, I couldn’t tell what was said, until the male voice grew a bit closer, then asked whoever was with him, “This one?”

  When the doorknob to the room I was hiding in turned, I held my breath and tried my best to blend in with the wall. But then it swung open, and in walked the most beautiful sight I’d ever seen. Except, he didn’t see me.

  Finn closed the door behind him with a heavy sigh, his head bowed as if in shame. Then he looked up and glanced around the room, sto
pping when he noticed the ensuite in the corner. He must’ve really had to go, because as soon as he spotted the open door, he made a beeline for it.

  When he got halfway across the room, I asked, “Who’d you walk in on?”

  He froze mid-step and gasped as his wide eyes found mine. I might’ve been mistaken, but I thought I saw him jump, too. With a groan, he shook his head and settled his posture. “Is it possible to find a room in this house that doesn’t have someone else in it?” Then he squared his shoulders and narrowed his gaze. “Have you been in here this whole time? While I’ve been out there with your family?”

  I shrugged, hoping to come across as innocent as I tried to portray.

  “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

  “Nope, not kidding. So, who’d you walk in on?”

  He huffed. “Your sister.”

  It was a good thing I was sitting, because I might’ve fallen over with as hard as I laughed. The image in my head of Finn seeing Gia on the toilet was hilarious—probably more hilarious than it would’ve been four-ish drinks ago.

  “It’s been nice chatting with you, but I have to take a piss before I embarrass myself any more than I already have.”

  I pushed myself off the floor and leaned my shoulder against the wall. “Need any help with that? You know, like, with holding it?”

  Again, he stopped and glared at me. It might’ve been the coladas tricking me, but I could’ve sworn I picked up on a little intrigue in his hesitation, as if he were contemplating my offer. But then he shook it off and said, “No.”

  Normally, I would’ve been embarrassed by suggesting such a thing—actually, I never would’ve even asked if it hadn’t been for the liquid courage currently coursing through my veins. I’d always been curious about it, but it was something I’d never, in a million years, planned to bring up. To anyone.