In The Midst Of Chaos: An MC Romance

by C. Lymari

  “He doesn’t shit where he eats” was all Duncan said, and somehow it didn’t make me feel better.

  “Wow, that’s a great way to avoid clingy bitches,” I said, full of sarcasm.

  “What I’m saying is that he stopped touching club whores a bit after you two got together, because he didn’t want it getting back to you.”

  I sucked in a breath.

  So the other girls were before me. Not that it should matter, but somehow it fucking did.

  “He was mad yesterday, but there was a pleased smile on his face.” Duncan came up to me and ruffled my hair.

  “Duncan, you are annoying.”

  “What are little brothers for?”

  I looked at him. “You are not my little brother.”

  “We’re like family.”

  “You do realize how bizarre that sounds since I’m fucking your brother and going to marry the other one?”

  “Kinky,” he murmured.

  He threw his arm around my shoulder, and I looked at our reflection in the mirror. We didn’t look bad together.

  “We would have made hot babies, Finnegan,” Duncan mused.

  “You were almost an option,” I humored him. “But you were too young.”

  “Like I said, Finland, my dick got bigger. I’m a big boy now, probably bigger than Nash.”

  “Dude, you are so fucking gross.” I pushed him aside, but he held me close.

  “Wanna find out?” He wiggled his brows.

  I rolled my eyes.

  Nash had not been home. He was “avoiding” me again—surprise, surprise.

  Of all the things our fathers had taught us, running had never been one of them, and it was all he ever did.

  I didn’t like it, but I understood it.

  He was the head of his family, and my family was all dead minus Aunt Riley and me, but she wasn’t blood, so she didn’t count as the rest of us.

  We were two heads out of the three.

  Nash, Nate, and I would be calling the shots.

  I could see why my father wanted me to marry Huxley because I would never bow to him. So my vote would be my own. I would have gotten lost in Nate, and the Primrose vote would cease to exist, making it only Crull and the Disciples.

  That kind of unity was dangerous.

  “You wanna do something?” I looked at Duncan as I went to grab the keys for the Mustang Eleanor had given me.

  “Like fuck?” He raised a brow.

  I pushed him away. “Duncan, stop. Seriously. You think I don’t feel bad about this?”

  He brought me into his arms. “Babe, I’m just joking. I love you. And I love my brothers, but hell, I know that Huxley doesn’t deserve you. He’s my brother, and I love him, but there’s so much self-loathing that until he takes care of it, there is no way he can love someone else when he doesn’t even accept it himself as he is.”

  I hugged him back. He had a point, but I still didn’t want to hurt him. When it came down to it, he was family, but he couldn’t see beyond his own greed.

  “Wanna go for a ride?” I asked, pulling up the key to his mom’s car. “But I drive. I’ve ridden bitch too many times.”

  He took the keys from me.

  “Don’t act like you don’t go around giving stiffies every time you get on that bike and ride.”

  I punched him in the gut. “I really want to hate you.”

  “But I’m your favorite,” he said, sounding a little out of breath.

  Unfortunately, I did.

  We didn’t do anything too exciting, just drove out to get some food.

  Duncan drove on the way there, and I drove on the way back. I let Duncan take it first since it was his mom’s car, and a part of me felt guilty she’d left it to me.

  Mom and Eleanor used to be best friends. It wasn’t like they had a choice, not when my father and Axton loved the Disciples more than they did their wives. They loved their offspring, so the priority on their husband’s list wasn’t very high.

  I was driving with the top down, and Duncan was bumping some old-school rap. “You sang that lyric wrong. He does not say that,” I told him as I reached for one of his french fries.

  “Dudeeeee, you ate yours already!”

  I was about to flick him off when my head hit the steering wheel.

  It hurt.

  Pain throbbed in my temple.

  It’s like it all happened in slow motion. Duncan’s fries went flying off. I saw how he held onto the dash of the car and turned back. I had barely gotten hold of the wheel and stopped the car from swerving when we got hit again from the side by a black van.

  The Mustang spun in circles, making me dizzy, or maybe that was from where the airbag hit my face.

  “Dun,” I said before I lost consciousness, but not before I saw the blood that trickled down his face.

  Nash

  I’d been at the clubhouse because I knew that if I went home, that was it. I would go into Finley’s room and fuck her so hard that I would leave the imprint of us on her bed. Her screaming would bring the walls of the manor crumbling down. There wouldn’t be any hiding the fact that I had a hard-on for that bitch.

  Fuck, I didn’t care if she was Huxley’s; she was mine. It was my dick that made her beg and moan. It was my dick that had been coated with her virgin blood.

  I knew what my father wanted. He didn’t want us to be in love because it made us weaker, but in reality, I didn’t think she made me vulnerable; if anything, she made me stronger. With her, I felt like I could conquer the world. There were no limitations. She made it seem like all I had to do was want it and it would be mine. And the only thing I wanted was her.

  “Slide another one over,” I told the new girl Ace had hired to manage the bar.

  She nodded and ran to get me another drink.

  I had just pulled it to my lips when Nate came running inside.

  “Brother,” he said, and I felt the hairs on the back of my neck raise at his tone.

  I put down the beer and then got up, making sure my gun was tucked inside my waistband. My father didn’t like us packing. Huxley hated it since he went to college, and he couldn’t exactly be carrying a gun on school grounds. For me, it was already second nature. I didn’t want to be unprepared.

  “Your mom’s Mustang was found wrecked.”

  I felt like the blood had drained from my face.

  Fuck this shit.

  This wasn’t happening. That car was now Finley’s. I didn’t think I could deal if anything happened to her. She needed to be okay. For fuck’s sake, you’d think she’d be safer in that car than on a fucking bike.

  “Is she okay?” I asked, already running outside.

  Nate stopped me, turning me around by the shoulder.

  “No one was in the car when it was found.”

  I punched the wall. Pain spread through my knuckles up to my wrist.

  “Fuck,” he hissed. “Bro, you need to get it together. You’re unraveling.”

  “That—”

  He cut off before I could let the whole world know what was going through my mind.

  “That’s your brother’s girl. Now take a deep breath. We don’t know anything else or who even was in the car.”

  He had a point, but I was too far gone to listen to it.

  I got on my bike, and Nate did the same. I called Duncan and no answer, but the little fucker never answered his phone, so I wasn’t surprised by this. Then I called Huxley.

  “Where are you?” I asked, trying to hide my frantic tone.

  “Out with Leon,” he said. I didn’t question it. He was Leon’s understudy. He was going to take over everything Leon did as soon as he graduated school. Something the fucker probably wasn’t too thrilled about.

  “Have you seen Finley?” I asked.

  “No, why?”

  I felt like the biggest piece of shit when I said, “Just wondering.”

  After all, I wasn’t sure if anything had happened, right? I glared at Nate so he wouldn’t say
shit, then rode out to my father’s house.

  Pain swept through my veins. I didn’t regret it. I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Every touch, every kiss, whimper, and moan, I cherished them all. For fuck’s sake, she was my girl. She was mine even before I found out she was going to marry my brother. I hated that I was going to hurt him. His pride was going to take a fucking hit all because I couldn’t keep my dick on a leash.

  But I couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t keep pretending like I was okay and let her marry him.

  Chapter Eighteen

  The taste of copper coated my tongue; it was bitter and metallic. My head throbbed, and I felt as if I were drunk—close to delirium.

  I tried to move, but I couldn’t.

  When I craned my neck, a soft whimper escaped my lips at the tenderness in my neck.

  “Shh.”

  I recognized Duncan’s voice.

  “Don’t make a noise,” he whispered.

  It took effort, but I opened my eyes and followed the sound of his voice. He was on the floor, and I was bound to a chair.

  My legs and hands were bound to the legs and arms while Duncan was hog-tied. His face was bloodied. He lay in a fetal position, and his face looked in pain.

  “Morning,” he managed to choke out.

  That’s when I realized he wasn’t whispering. He just couldn’t talk without the pain taking over.

  “Duncan,” I whispered as I looked down at him.

  “Don’t give me that look,” he rasped. “I’m a little banged up, but I’m not broken.”

  I tried to wiggle myself and noticed there was a little room to move.

  “It’s going to be okay,” I said. “My father tied me up like this once.”

  Duncan laughed. It sounded like choked sobs.

  “Of course he did,” he muttered.

  That’s when I looked around to see what kind of room we were in. It had to be a basement. And not in a shitty house. It looked new with just enough structure to get the house sold and the promise of turning the room into the basement of your dreams. The kinds you found the upper middle class living in. The room was quiet, and I could see the light peeking through a window in the far corner.

  “What happened?” I whispered.

  “I’m not sure, Finnegan, but I’m sure they…” Duncan stopped talking. He was in so much pain, and I bet he had a bruised rib. They weren’t fun. I had one when I was learning how to ride. “…they call this kidnapping.”

  “If you weren’t in pain, I’d kick you.”

  “Kinda h-hard to do being tied up, Finnegan.”

  Well, judging by the shit coming out of his mouth, he was okay for now. Or unless this was that thing that people went through—that adrenaline push before they died. My lip wobbled.

  “Focus, Finley.” I could hear my father’s voice as if it were yesterday. When my fight-or-die nature kicked in, he spoke to me.

  “Dun-Dun,” I whispered.

  “Mhmm,” he moaned.

  “Don’t die on me.”

  I wiggled in my chair, knowing what I had to do for us to survive.

  Fuck.

  Here goes nothing.

  When he heard the first thump, Duncan raised his head and glared at me. He had murder in his eyes.

  “Finley!” he warned, but it was too late.

  Nash

  The drive back to the manor passed in a blur. I didn’t even know how fast it was going, just that I couldn’t stop until Finley was in my arms.

  As we pulled up, I all but jumped off my bike. At the moment, I didn’t care if it was shredded to pieces.

  I jogged the steps to the main entrance, not breaking a sweat. My heart kept thumping me, telling me to find her.

  “Finley!” I started to yell as soon as I walked through the doors.

  “Finley!” I screamed louder as I made it to the other set of stairs going up to her tower.

  “What the hell is going on?” My father came out of his study, glaring at me.

  “Have you seen Finley?”

  “No, should I have?” he asked, annoyed.

  “Mom’s car was found wrecked and abandoned,” I spat at my father, his face ashen by my news.

  “None of the boys have seen Duncan today,” Nate informed grimly. I had forgotten he was behind me.

  I took off running, ignoring my father’s shouts, and made my way to her room, barging in through the door.

  “Finley!” I screamed so loud my throat went raw. The room smelled like her. It had her sweetness, her warmth, and I’d been an idiot who thought I could do without any of that for the rest of my life.

  I ran back downstairs, ready to ride to hell if it meant I would find her.

  My father was downstairs with Nate. He was shouting to whoever was on the other side of the phone.

  When he ended the call, he turned to me.

  “Dion just informed me that Duncan and Finley left for a ride.”

  “Fuck,” I screamed.

  I grabbed the first thing my hand made contact with and slammed it against the wall.

  “That vase cost ten thousand dollars,” my father informed me coldly.

  “I don’t give a fuck,” I told him.

  “You need to stay calm. Yelling and throwing a tantrum won’t help us in this situation.”

  He had a point, I knew he did, but I couldn’t think straight. All I could think of was the worst possible scenario.

  “Gunner called for church. We’ll get the guys mobilized. If anyone can find her, it’s Andre.”

  Nate squeezed my shoulder and left the house with a head nod to my dad. He was right—Andre was one of the best trackers, and if there was anything, he would pick up on it.

  I turned around and looked at my father.

  Every day I looked more and more like him. I think that’s why I got all the tattoos. To separate myself from him as much as possible. To remind myself that I had my own choices, and even though he was handing me a legacy, I did not need to make his same mistakes.

  “I love her,” I told him.

  “Did you call your brother?” he said, ignoring my previous statement.

  “The night she took the vow, I made her mine.”

  My father’s shoulders dropped. He knew I would never betray my family, but I had. I did it for her, and I didn’t regret one second of it.

  “Fucking shit, Nash,” he scolded me and walked out the door, leaving me alone in this too big of a house.

  Walking into Crull Manor was like rolling the dice. There was a chance that you would die. It happened to Finley’s parents, to my mom, and I was damned if I let it happen to my brother and Finley.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Past

  Every time I closed my eyes, all I could see was my brother holding onto my girl’s face and kissing her. My first reaction was to beat the shit of everyone and anyone who dared touch what was mine.

  I couldn’t even call her mine. Just in the confines of our rooms, we belonged to each other.

  Then I remembered that she was his. That she was going to marry him. I didn’t know that it was because she had chosen it to be that way.

  I’d always thought it was something our parents had arranged. Something out of our control. It would have made this terrible situation somewhat tolerable. The fact that my brother knew she had chosen him made me feel like an idiot. Like I had been kept in the dark for a reason.

  My father wanted him to know that he wanted him to fight for Finley. She wasn’t mine yet, but she was close. I could feel it with every touch and taste it with every kiss. I couldn’t keep saying no to her. She was my weakness—except she couldn’t be.

  My brothers and I were in my father’s office, along with Leon, discussing business. It was something I felt Finley should be here for, but my father wasn’t as open-minded as Micah had been.

  “Shouldn’t we ask Finley about that?” I asked, directing my question to Leon since he oversaw Micah’s shares now that he was dead and not here to overse
e them himself.

  “And what is a seventeen-year-old girl going to tell me that I didn’t know about?” Leon bit back.

  “She thinks more like Micah than any of us,” I answered.

  “Unfortunately, that’s true,” my father replied, none too thrilled.

  “I say it’s a good idea to invest,” Huxley said, standing up straighter, referring to investing Finley’s money without her knowledge into a company that was a big gamble.

  “And since when do you speak for her?” I asked my brother.

  He smirked at me. “Since she’s to be my wife.”

  My arms all but clawed at the armrest in the chair. I was going to be sick with dread at the idea.

  I hated it.

  “I still think Finley should be here,” I told them. Duncan was on his phone, barely paying attention to us. Anything corporate related bored him.

  “Micah used to take her everywhere, and since she came to live with us, you have treated her like she’s made of fine china. None of us are.”

  My father nodded, taking in my point. My brother’s lips curled in disgust.

  “Listen, I know you love Finley like a sister, but that’s it; she’s not a sister to me. She’s my wife—”

  I cut him off. “She’s nothing yet.”

  “But she will be.”

  I got up.

  “Fine, do what you want, but when she rebels against all of you for treating her like a child, don’t say I didn’t warn the fuck out of you.”

  I walked out of the meeting room because I couldn’t stand to see my brother and not imagine him doing all the things I had been doing to Finley behind his back.

  The meeting room was on the same floor as my father’s and Micah’s offices. They didn’t want to be all the way at the top; they were somewhere a little lower. They could make it with ease to all floors without breaking a sweat if the need to run came.

  I pushed the door and walked into Micah’s office.

  He hadn’t wanted me to marry his daughter. I asked my father a few weeks back if I could be the one to marry Finley since I knew her and she was fond of the life we lived, trying to bring it up as inconspicuously as possible.