Starting Over

by Erin Cristofoli

  I grabbed her hand and pulled her inside with me. It had been quite some time since I’d had the time to make it out here, but it really hadn’t changed at all. There were stacks of hay that my family kept out here for emergency, and a ladder that led to the loft. I watched Kate walk around, checking out all the details, snapping a photo here and there.

  I grabbed the camera from her hand and starting snapping a few of her. She laughed and tried to hide behind her hands, running around me so I couldn’t keep up. I gestured to the ladder leading to the loft. “Why don’t you head up there?” Then I had to make the effort not to watch her climb the ladder. I didn’t want this to be about my desire for her, but rather, more about opening up to her and letting her see more of the real me. When I joined her in the loft, she was smiling at the sight before her.

  Old pictures of me with my family, movie stubs, even some odd things I had written and pictures I had drawn were tacked onto the walls and beams in one corner of the loft. A shelf I had made when I was twelve contained a couple of action figures, a hockey trophy, and a well-worn baseball cap that I used to wear to work in the orchard.

  “Is this you?” she asked, pointing to one of the pictures.

  “Yup, it seems a little silly to me now, to be showing you all this, but I wanted you to see it. No one ever really came up here besides me.”

  She walked over to the display of my life and sunk down to her knees. Her fingers brushed over many pictures, and I was transfixed. My desire to have her see me as more than just her boss was overwhelming. Would this help?

  “Thank you for sharing with me, Ben. This is a really special spot.” Without really thinking, I raised her camera to my eye and snapped a photo of her sitting there, genuine interest on her face. When she heard the click, she glanced up at me and smiled. “Hey, I should be doing that.”

  Then an idea struck me. “I’ll tell you what. Maybe we can do a shot of the both of us.” I figured out where the timer was and placed the camera on an old crate across form us. I pushed the button and then sat beside Kate, hoping she would lean into me; as the camera clicked the picture, that was not the case. I was pretty sure we looked like complete strangers. “All right, maybe we should do one more?” I asked, hopeful. “Why don’t you set it up?”

  Kate hopped up, and I was given the gift of a glimpse of her ass in the tight jeans she wore. She set the camera and was going to return to her spot beside me, when I pulled her across my lap and in to a hug. Kate squealed in surprise, our eyes locking as I heard the camera click.

  Memories flickered in my mind of the adventures I had in this barn, and it dawned on me that I could show Kate one more thing. “Okay, I’m going back down for a moment. Stay up here until I call for you,” I told her. Her eyes lit with curiosity, and she nodded with a smile.

  I made my way back down the ladder and went to the pile of hay. After loosening a couple of large bales, I spread them out. I used to love to play in the hay as a kid. I wondered if Kate had ever had such an experience and wanted to share that too with her.

  “All right, Kate, come on down!” I called up to her.

  Slowly, Kate made her way down and stopped with a couple of rungs to go when she saw me sitting in the hay below her. “What are you doing?”

  I stood and grabbed the camera off of her. “Let me have this. Okay, so go ahead and jump. I promise it’s soft.”

  “You’re kidding, right?”

  “Uh, no, I’m serious. I used to love to do this as a kid – okay, not only as a kid. Come on, live a little, woman!”

  Kate scowled at me. “All right, Mr. Boss Man.” She jumped and landed in the soft hay. She was laughing as she picked a couple pieces from her face, and I quickly snapped a shot of her.

  “Here.” I handed her camera back to her. “Now, it’s my turn. Move over. I don’t want to crush you.”

  She snapped a picture of me on the ladder and then quickly shuffled out of the way. I jumped into the space beside her, jarring the whole pile of hay and effectively rolling Kate back toward me, lodging her against my side. Laughing, Kate raised her camera above our heads and snapped a picture, and then as she went to snap another for good measure, I leaned in and kissed her cheek tenderly. I looked into her eyes when she turned to look at me, and electricity exploded between us. So badly, I wanted to seal my mouth over hers and claim her as my own, once and for all, but her expression changed to confusion.

  Kate shook her head and practically whispered, “I promised Jen I would let things go as they may and not over analyze everything, but I can’t.” She sat up beside me before continuing. “I like you, Ben, I do, though I hate to admit it. I wish I didn’t. Life would be a lot easier, I’ll tell you that. But I think I am just too scarred to let go.” Kate stood and brushed herself off, and I joined her, picking stray pieces of hay from her hair.

  “We should probably be getting back for dinner. The family has probably all gathered by now. Come on.” I smiled down at her, and we returned to the sleigh.

  We rode back in silence, but the gears in my mind continued to turn. She had admitted to liking me, at least. Neither of us could deny the charge between us. I wished I could tell her that I was her masked man, but I was positive this holiday was not the occasion for that.

  We pulled up in front of the house, and I told her, “I’m going to go unhitch the horse. You head in and freshen up. I will be in shortly to introduce you to the rest of the family.”

  “Rest of the family?” Kate asked, confused.

  “I left that part out so you wouldn’t be overwhelmed, but there will be aunts and uncles and probably a couple cousins joining us for dinner.”

  Kate nodded slowly and sighed, deciding not to fight me, and headed inside the house as I made my way back to the barn to unhitch the horse.

  “Mom, you really outdid yourself with dinner this year,” I praised her as we all sat by the fire, our extended relatives having long since gone home.

  “Thank you, dear,” she replied happily. “I have Audrey and Kate to thank for all the help.”

  “I didn’t do very much. I couldn’t possibly take any credit for that amazing meal.” Kate smiled at Mom.

  I watched Kate return to her thoughts, staring into the fire. She had done amazingly well with my crazy family. She held her own, as I knew she would, but she went above and beyond; I watched her snap photos through the night of our family, even suggesting a group shot before everyone left.

  After a short time, I leaned in and whispered to her, “Are you all right, Kate? You seem a bit quiet.”

  “Uh huh, I’m fine,” she replied, her eyes looking a little misty. “This really has been an incredible holiday for me. I’ll be sad to leave tomorrow. Hell, I’m sad to be thinking of it now. You have a wonderful family. I can imagine what it must have been like to grow up here with them all. I’m so grateful to have been part of it. Thank you, Ben, for insisting I come with you.”

  “You’re welcome,” was all I could come up with in reply.

  Mom, who had clearly been listening, assured Kate, “You are always welcome here, Kate, with or without my son.”

  Kate chuckled quietly, some of the sadness fading from her eyes. “Thank you.”

  She turned to me. “I think I am going to head to bed. All that food has made me sleepy.”

  I nodded. “Not a bad idea. I want to be rested for the drive home tomorrow.”

  “How about I get one more shot of you and my son over there by the tree?” Mom suggested.

  We both stood and posed, Kate placing a hand on my chest, my arm around her shoulders. She went to retrieve the camera when Mom was finished, and we paused at the doorway to wish everyone a goodnight.

  “Ah, ah, ah, wait just a minute, you two,” Mom called out.

  We both stopped and looked at Mom, who was looking up above us. “As you know,” she continued, “there is a long standing tradition, and as you’ve realized by now, Kate, our family is very big on traditions. So, being you are unde
r the mistletoe with my son, tradition states that you two have to kiss!” She squealed with excitement, and the entire family seemed to immediately pay more attention than usual.

  “Um... well, Ben is still my boss. I’m not sure...”

  “Mom, come on, not every tradition needs to be followed.”

  I sighed and looked down at Kate. As if our situation wasn’t already complicated after today’s trip to the barn, this wasn’t going to help; or wait, maybe, just maybe it would.

  “Bullshit!” my mother exclaimed, shocking the hell out of me. Where had that come from? Kate looked thoughtful. She was clearly sorting this out in her mind. “Well? We aren’t getting any younger over here!” I wished Mom would give it a rest.

  Kate gave a tiny nod, and I smiled at her; I couldn’t help it. I was looking forward to kissing her. We both leaned in slightly, and I gave her a brief peck on the lips. I’d been dying to kiss her, but I didn’t go crazy. Hell, I would take whatever I could get with this woman.

  “You call that a kiss? I did not raise my son to kiss a beautiful woman like that. Come on! Lay one on her, son!” My dad joined in on the battery of comments.

  Kate was blushing a deep crimson. Ah, what the hell. It was now or never. I shrugged and pulled on her wrist, pulling her into my chest, then slipped a finger under her chin and raised it so she was looking at me. Our eyes met just as I swooped in for a deep, powerful, and hot as hell kiss that seemed to make everything around us disappear.

  My lips moved over hers, and I really expected her to fight me or stiffen against me, but she didn’t. Instead, she seemed to melt further into me. Her lips kissed me back with earnest as her hands held onto my shoulders. Reluctantly, I released her, my family cheering us on. A stunned Kate stood there, and a sigh that sounded an awful lot like “wow” escaped her lips. I just prayed that my instant hard-on wouldn’t be noticeable to the family.

  Mom approached us. “Now, that was a kiss! Thank you for keeping with tradition. Sweet dreams, you two!” She hugged us both and sent us on our way.

  Kate walked to her room in stunned silence. I wished her goodnight as she went into her room, and she mumbled a goodnight in return before closing the door behind her.

  I was sure she had plenty to think about after the unleashing all of that pent up desire, so I decided to leave her to her thoughts. I knew for sure I would not be resting easy. My cock was straining against my jeans, and though it wasn’t my preferred choice, I decided to get some relief, hoping in the process that Kate would not hear me.

  It was a new year – a new year that so far had been just a little bit pathetic. After the amazingly epic kiss with Ben, I had avoided the topic like the plague. Things were a little tense between us, awkward even; okay, maybe it was only awkward on my side. Ben, in fact, had been amazing. He carried on business as usual, and we still spent long hours together. It was almost as if the kiss had meant nothing to him. Except, there were occasions when I could see a smoldering look deep in his eyes when he looked at me, which caused my head and my heart to restart the battle that was raging inside me. I wasn’t sure which one was going to win. One thing I did know – that kiss definitely meant more than nothing to the both of us.

  I had been sitting in Ben’s office for most of the day, supposed to be going over the first stages of a presentation we were preparing, when I was jolted out of my reverie at the sound of my phone chiming. I looked down to see that it was a text from Sir. I hadn’t heard from him since before the Christmas holidays. The text came as a complete surprise; I had half expected that he would have probably moved on after so much time had passed. After all, he hadn’t wanted anything long-term right from the start.

  Tomorrow night, come to the club straight from work. I am in need of a naughty secretary. There will be a message for you at the bar.

  I felt my cheeks flush a deep crimson as a shiver ran up my spine.

  “You all right, Kate?” Ben asked with a quizzical look on his face.

  “Uh, yeah, I’m fine. Thanks. Sorry, I was a little distracted. Where were we?”

  Ben leaned back in his chair. “It was your mystery man, wasn’t it?”

  When I nodded, his eyes blazed as he murmured, “Lucky man.”

  I arrived at the club and made a bee-line for the bar. I was nervous and excited all at the same time, but there was something nagging at me. I couldn’t get Ben out of my mind. I tried to push him further down out of my thoughts and flagged the bartender, who came over with a note card.

  Come up to room 301

  Sir

  I made my way quickly to the elevator and up to the room. After knocking, I heard his order to enter, and immediately, goose bumps covered my body in anticipation. I wore a tight grey pencil skirt and a plunging neckline on my button down purple blouse and heels, my hair up in a messy bun. It wasn’t really my standard work wear, but I wanted to impress Sir. The outfit had definitely grabbed Ben’s attention. Numerous times, I had caught him looking at me like he was about to jump over his desk at me. The idea of his desire for me fueled the fire that had been growing for him. It was almost out of control, and my body was definitely in need of some sort of release.

  I glanced up and saw him. Sir was sitting in a lonely lounge chair in the middle of the room, an evil glimmer in his eyes, and I couldn’t help but shiver with excitement. He was the epitome of sexy sophistication in his grey slacks and crisp white dress shirt; I ached to touch him.

  He beckoned me with his finger, and I slowly moved toward him, giving a little extra sway to my hips, the action not lost on him as he eyed me with lust. I stopped in front of him, just between his open legs. Sir ran his strong hands slowly, achingly so, up my thighs to my waist. He continued the journey up to my ribs and stopped just short of my breasts, which ached for his touch. Then, all too soon, his hands were gone as he leaned back in his chair. Tease.

  “Loosen your hair,” he ordered, and I did so as quickly as I could, letting it fall around my shoulders. “Unbutton your blouse.” As I did, our eyes locked on each other. He stopped me before removing it all together, just giving himself a glimpse of my breasts in my sheer, lacy bra. My skirt was next, slowly lowered to the ground. I looked up when I heard a growl erupt from deep in his chest at the sight of my lacy thong with matching garters that held my barely there nylons up. He feasted on the sight before him, and I had honestly never felt so sexy in my life. I had made damn sure that he would like what he saw, and I wasn’t disappointed with his reaction.

  I noticed his restraint in not touching me. Almost like the restraint I see in Ben’s eyes, I thought to myself. Why was I even thinking of Ben right then? The answer was stupidly easy: I wanted Ben. Closing my eyes for a moment, I tried to clear my head. I decided to let go for the night and think everything through in the morning.

  Sir noticed my hesitation. “Is there something wrong, Kate?”

  “No, Sir,” I quickly replied, not wanting to disappoint him.

  “Good. Whatever you do, keep those heels on. You look so fucking sexy right now.” He motioned with his finger that he wanted me to turn around, so I slowly, teasingly did a little circle for him, giving him a better view of my nearly bare ass and my increasingly wet pussy. When I was facing him again, he pulled me close and kissed my belly, then slowly pressed his thumb firmly against my clit and circled my sensitive spot. I closed my eyes to the touch and moaned; I needed more of that so badly, but he didn’t give it to me.

  Instead, he ordered me to my knees. “Take out my cock, Kate.”

  I undid the top button of his pants and slowly unzipped them, running my hand firmly up the growing bulge there. His responding growl fueled me. I smiled and grabbed him a little harder, wanting to tease him, but he was having none of my teasing. Sir grabbed my hand and slid it down inside his pants, and I was shocked to find him going commando. I surrounded him with my hand and gave him a squeeze before releasing his package from the confines of his pants. I wanted to taste him so badly; I needed to. Runni
ng a solitary finger over the head, I found the bead of pre-cum I was looking for, then brought my finger to my mouth and tasted him.

  Sir’s eyes darkened with lust as he weaved his fingers through my hair, pulling, so I knew who was really in charge. He directed my head over him, and I took him into my mouth, hearing him groan as I soaked him.

  In and out, he directed our movements at a painfully slow speed. I wondered why he wanted to torture himself, but his erection got harder with each thrust. I wanted to finish him, have him come in my mouth or across my chest, or hell, anywhere else that would please him I would have done for him, but again, he had other plans. Too soon, he pulled out of my mouth, much to my disappointment.

  “Stand,” Sir ordered, and I did so without hesitation. He walked away, and a moment later returned with a blanket and some pillows that he placed on the floor in front of the chair in the middle of the room. He sat back down and motioned to the blanket. “Lie down, Kate, on your back, and spread your legs for me.” His eyes blazed into me, his words making me so hot and wet I could hardly stand it. “Good girl. Now touch yourself. I want you to put on a show for me, you dirty girl.”

  I had never done that in front of someone before, but his demands turned me on and made me bold, so I did. I rubbed little circles over my clit then down to my ass and back again. He told me to pull my thong to the side and continue. Again, I stroked myself while he watched. All the while, I watched his cock stand there untouched.

  As I took off my thong, he told me, “So far so good, but you can do better. Put a finger in your pussy, and then another. Don’t stop rubbing your clit, baby. This really is a beautiful sight to see.” I was so hot and bothered; I would have done it for a room full of people if he had asked. I just needed to climax.

  “That’s enough. Come here.” He pulled me forward until I straddled him in the chair. I rubbed myself against the length of his sheathed cock, soaking him in my juices. When had he done that? He growled as he twitched against me, lifting my hips and slowly lowering me onto him. Ah, the feeling of being full of him was almost too much. I raised and lowered myself onto him, my hips rocking. His hands that had grasped my hips rose to my aching breasts, finding their way to my nipples, and he gently pinched me. Heaven. Then he pinched harder, almost too painfully. He surprised me by pulling nipple clamps from behind him and clamped the painful instruments on my nipples. Where did those come from? They hurt but it seemed to be just what I needed. He pulled on them to show me how painful it could be, a sharp gasp escaping my mouth. But then as he flicked my nipples with his tongue, the pain turned into pleasure.