Sucker Punch

by Laurell K. Hamilton

  “You are not bothered by this, any of you?” Olaf said. I didn’t know whom he was asking, but Nicky answered.

  “Why should we be?”

  “She is only one woman. How can you be happy sharing her with so many others?”

  Nicky smiled and let himself look pleased. “Do you think that the only person I have sex with is Anita?”

  Olaf looked at him. “I did.”

  Careful not to compromise Nicky’s gun hand, Angel came and slid her arm through Nicky’s. Her lipstick was perfectly red once more; she’d retouched it while I was kissing Pierette. Angel leaned her head toward Nicky like they were posing for a couple’s photo. She gave that smile she seemed to be able to do at the drop of a hat. Nicky smiled that guy smile. The one that said, I get to hit this, and it still hasn’t screwed up my primary relationship. It wasn’t a cat-with-cream smile; it was a have-your-cake-and-eat-it-too smile.

  I looked at the two of them and thought of all the times we’d been together, usually with Dev or Nathaniel, and a couple of times with both of them. That had been fun. I gave a little shiver that went from my head to my feet, and now my breathing was faster just thinking about it.

  “What did you react to just now?” Olaf asked.

  “The possibilities,” I said and smiled, and realized that maybe my smile was a have-your-cake-and-eat-it-too smile.

  “Doesn’t it bother you that Nicky is having sex with all the other women?”

  Nicky corrected him. “Angel and I have sex together. Petra and I don’t. It’s a person-by-person negotiation.”

  Olaf looked back at me. “And it doesn’t bother you that Nicky is fucking another woman?”

  I don’t know what made me be honest. Maybe it was the feel of Pierette’s hand in mine or the memory of being with Nicky and Angel together. “I’m there when he does it, so no.”

  Olaf stared at me. “Now you are teasing me.”

  “I’m telling you the absolute truth, Olaf . . . Otto,” I said, trying to get back in the habit of using the right name before we went back in to the other cops.

  He looked from Nicky to me, then to each of the women, then back to me. He looked at Ethan. “Do you also negotiate individually?”

  “I just have sex with Anita and my girlfriend. That’s enough for me.”

  “At the same time?” Olaf asked.

  Ethan gave a nervous laugh. “Not Nilda and Anita. No, just . . . no.”

  We all agreed with him, since Nilda was an ancient werebear with a temper that had required therapy. I was glad that she and Ethan seemed to love each other to pieces, because she was one of the most unstable of the Harlequin. Nilda and Ethan as a couple helped keep the rest of us safer.

  “Is Petra only having sex with you, Anita?” I realized that Olaf was asking questions of me and the men, but that he hadn’t spoken directly to either of the other women. It was the way he’d talked to me when we first met: sort of around me, talking more to Edward than to me.

  If it had been almost anyone else, I’d have forced them to talk directly to the women, but if Olaf saw me and the other men as a gateway to the women, that worked for me. Maybe he wouldn’t talk to them without one of us present. I especially didn’t want him talking alone with Pierette.

  “Not just me.”

  “So, if I wished to negotiate with her for sex, you would have no objection?”

  My pulse was suddenly trying to jump out the side of my neck. He hadn’t said anything wrong really. He’d been amazingly polite, so why was I scared?

  “I do not wish to sleep with him, my queen. Please don’t make me,” she said.

  There was fear in her voice. It surprised me enough to look at her, and the expression on her face matched the voice. She was scared of Olaf. I mean, he was scary, but she’d hunted scarier things than him for hundreds of years. Even if he scared her, she didn’t have to show it this much. What was she doing, and why? She moved behind me like I would be her shield, which seemed weird for someone who was supposed to be my bodyguard.

  I knew too many of the older vampires who treated their moitiés bêtes, beast halves, like slaves, but Pierrot didn’t treat her that way, or I hadn’t thought he did. I thought they were lovers as well as master and servant. Now I was suddenly wondering if he did abuse her. In old vampire society, animals to call had no rights. Jean-Claude and I were changing that and stopping the abuse when we found out about it, but some of the animals to call had centuries of being more possessions than partners to their masters. I had thought better of Pierrot, but Pierette’s reaction let me know that better wasn’t the same thing as good.

  “No one will make you have sex with anyone, Petra. We keep telling you that’s not how things work with us.” I stroked her face, my other hand still in hers. She wouldn’t meet my eyes. Her shoulders were rounded; her entire posture was huddled in upon herself. Shit.

  I felt the heat of lion, smelled it like grass baked under a merciless sun. I looked at Olaf. He was watching Pierette like he’d seen a wounded gazelle at a watering hole. Crap, crap, crap. Her reaction had just made her even more his perfect victim.

  49

  LEDUC CAME OUT of the building, moving our way like he had a purpose. That purpose was probably to yell at us. Either Edward and Newman hadn’t been wingmen enough to keep him busy, or Edward had decided Leduc interrupting us with Olaf was the lesser evil. I hoped the sheriff hadn’t seen me kiss either of the women, but of course . . .

  “What the hell, Blake? Are you going to kiss all of them? If you want a booty call, then get out of my town and go home.”

  Great, just great, he’d seen at least some of it.

  Edward was trailing behind Leduc, and just the way he was moving told me that he’d let the sheriff out to distract Olaf, or maybe he’d been afraid of what we’d do once we were all alone with the big guy. Did he really think we’d kill Olaf and play the “We have no idea where he went” game? Or was that what Edward was beginning to debate doing himself? I’d ask him later if we were ever alone on this damn case.

  I stepped away from everyone, and when Nicky tried to follow, I said, “Stay, and that goes for all of you.”

  I was pissed, so pissed, and before I’d worked on my anger issues, I’d have lashed out at Leduc and made everything worse, but I was in the wrong here. If I’d seen another police officer smooching someone while we were in the middle of a murder investigation and Bobby’s life was hanging in the balance, I’d have ripped them a new one, so what could I do? I tried for a version of the truth, because I couldn’t think of a lie that would help dig me out of the unprofessional hole I’d just fallen into.

  “I’m sorry, Sheriff. I have behaved unprofessionally, and I’m embarrassed by it,” I said fast as he was drawing breath to yell at me again.

  He hesitated like he was rethinking what he was going to say, which was what I was hoping he’d do. “Hell, Blake, you keep apologizing for all the over-the-top PDA, but you’re still doing it.”

  “I know and I’m sorry, but . . . You have a wife, right?” I said.

  Leduc frowned at me. “Yes.”

  “What would you do if she showed up on the job and wanted you to give her a hug?”

  “My wife would never do that. She knows when I’m working, I’m working.”

  “Did she know it when you began dating?”

  He frowned harder. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, Blake.”

  I leaned into him like I was confiding in him, and he leaned in to hear me. Let’s hear it for social conditioning. “I was unprofessional with Nicky. I own that. But then I didn’t greet the women the same way, because one stupid moment was all I allowed myself.”

  “So why did you kiss both of them? I can’t even wrap my head around the fact that you’re dating this many people.”

  “It’s a lot of people even to me, Sheriff, tru
st me.”

  “Then why do it?”

  I glanced back at the two women and Nicky. “Which of them would you kick out of bed for eating crackers?”

  Leduc glanced behind me and got a considering look on his face. Then he grinned and started shaking his head. He gave me that guy-to-guy look that I’d gotten from a few of the police officers at home when they met some of the women in my life. I’d had two of them tell me, “You dog.” I knew it was a compliment, just not one I’d ever thought I’d get.

  “Well, now, can’t argue that, but that much eye candy is going to be damn distracting.” Leduc’s eyes narrowed to nicely skeptical cop eyes. “You going to be too distracted to do your job?”

  “I deserve that, but I promise the public displays of affection are over until we get a break in the case.”

  “You said the big guy was your mistake, so why kiss the others if you knew better?”

  Then I lied, and I took a chance that a long-married man would understand something that you only learned if you dated women. “Some version of ‘if you loved me as much as you love him.’ Basically, those two kisses just kept me out of the doghouse with two women.”

  My answer wasn’t strictly true. Angel wasn’t that serious about me or anyone. Pierette would never have pushed her advantage. She saw herself as serving her queen, me. She’d volunteered and pursued the relationship, but she still wouldn’t push that much. But I couldn’t explain all that to Leduc. I could explain trying to keep the women in your life happy.

  “But you’re a woman, too, Blake.”

  “Trust me, what sex I am doesn’t matter at all, only theirs.”

  “So, what if they get their feelings hurt and need more romantic reassurance again? They’re going to distract you from the case.”

  “I’m going to make it really clear that this is the one and only PDA for this trip, and if they can’t understand that, then I’ll be in the doghouse when we get home.”

  “I can’t quite picture a woman being in the doghouse the same way that a man ends up there.”

  “Trust me, Duke”—yes, I even stooped to using his nickname—“if you’re dating women and certain men, the doghouse doesn’t care if you’re male or female.”

  He frowned at me. “Seems like women should be smart enough to stay out of trouble.”

  I shook my head. “Maybe, but I’m not.”

  He smiled. “I heard the rumors that you were sleeping around, but that’s not it. That’s casual, and casual doesn’t give people the power to make you do stupid shit like you just did.”

  “Whatever I’m doing, it’s not casual.”

  “Well, wouldn’t want to get a fellow officer in the doghouse with two women at once.”

  “Thank you, Duke. I really appreciate that.”

  He shook his head and actually patted my shoulder. “Being with one woman is hard enough, Blake. Good luck to you.”

  “Thanks, and could I have a few minutes alone to explain the no more PDA for the rest of the trip?”

  “How many of them are staying for the talk?”

  I looked at them and realized that it was everyone but Milligan and Custer. “All of them, I guess, except for Otto Jeffries.”

  He laughed. “Then I can give you privacy, Blake, but this is not the definition of being alone.”

  “No arguments,” I said.

  Leduc went inside, but Olaf didn’t want to go without us—okay, mostly me—so I told him a version of the same thing I’d told Leduc. “I need some privacy to talk to the women in my life, Otto. We need to make it clear that this is the last PDA while I’m working. I smoothed it over with Leduc once, but I can’t do it twice.”

  “You have explained it to them,” he said.

  I shook my head. “One of the hard things about dating women is that it takes more explaining to explain things, especially emotional ones.”

  He stared at me, frowning, thinking hard. “You are admitting that women are not logical?”

  “No, but they are more complicated than men when it comes to dating and romance.”

  He seemed to think about that and then finally shook his head. “I will agree, and I will leave you to speak to the . . . women in your life.”

  Olaf started walking toward the offices. When he walked through the door, Edward tipped his hat to me from the little porch and followed inside.

  Once they were inside and the rest of us were as alone as we were going to get, I turned on them and said, “You have minutes to tell me why the fuck Pierette is here. Isn’t it enough that I fit his victim profile? Did you have to endanger someone else?”

  “I am your bodyguard. It is my duty to put myself between you and danger,” Pierette said, and she didn’t sound the least bit frightened now. She stood tall and certain, as if the woman who had just finished hiding behind me was someone else. It reminded me of how Edward could switch to Ted.

  “What exactly does that mean?” I asked.

  Pierette just looked at me with her brown eyes, made larger with the eyeliner, which she never wore at home. “I serve my queen in any way she requires.”

  I turned to the one person I knew had to tell me the truth. “What the hell is going on, Nicky?”

  “It wasn’t my idea. I knew you’d hate it,” he said.

  “What wasn’t your idea?”

  “To bring Pierette and Angel here to help you deal with Olaf.”

  Then I had a thought, and he was right. I hated it. “Pierette, you were pretending to be afraid of him just now. It’s not enough that you look like his favorite type of victim. You’re playing to it.”

  “I am afraid of him, my queen. I would not want to be helpless in his hands. I merely let him see the fear rather than hiding it.” She was so calm as she spoke.

  “Why? Why would you do that?”

  “To tempt him.”

  “What?” Angel tried to put an arm around my shoulders, and I moved away from her. “And you, why are you flirting with him?”

  “If you mean the clothes, I was at the concert. I didn’t wear them for anyone here.”

  She sounded angry then, but I’d had my last emotional-blackmail moment from either of them. I’d already apologized once for her missing the night out with everyone. I was done with that.

  “I don’t mean the clothes, and you know it. Why are you flirting with him, of all people?”

  “We wanted to see if he’d respond to normal flirting,” she said as if what she’d done was a matter of course.

  “Why would you want him to respond to it?”

  “They’re here to try to take some of the pressure off of you,” Ethan said.

  I took a deep breath and counted to ten as I let it out slowly. It didn’t really help. “If you came to protect me from Olaf, and not to help me save Bobby Marchand’s life, you can drive right back to the airport and get the hell away from me.”

  “If he responds to me flirting with him, then maybe he’s datable in some weird, psychotic way,” Angel said.

  “He’s not psychotic, and are you volunteering to date Olaf?”

  She laughed. “I’m too tall, too blond, and too blue eyed, but if he wasn’t fixated on his victims, then he’d be totally hot.”

  Whatever look was on my face made her laugh again, but this one was a nervous one. “Come on, Anita, if you just look at the physical, he’s smokin’ hot.”

  “I guess his whole liking to kidnap, tie up, torture, and rape women ruins it for me.”

  “I actually think the danger is part of what makes him hot.”

  I looked at Angel as if I’d never seen her before. “Well, forgive me as a woman that fits his vic profile to a T if I don’t find it intriguing.”

  “And that is why Pierette is here,” Angel said.

  “This is ridiculous. We are not doing this. It is a stupid
and dangerous plan.”

  “It’s not stupid,” Nicky said, “but I knew you’d hate it.”

  “It is stupid. I won’t let Pierette endanger herself. I don’t want anyone to be at Olaf’s mercy—certainly not someone I’ve had sex with and actually like.”

  “I am honored that you care for me that much, my queen, but if I could end this threat to you once and for all, it would be worth the danger.”

  “You do not understand what he is, or you wouldn’t say that.”

  “It is he who does not know what I am,” she said. She let her face show the confidence of centuries of being one of the most feared assassins in the world. She and all the other Harlequin had been so frightening that even mentioning their name could have gotten bad little vampires executed. Now they were part of our bodyguards, and if they spied, they did it for Jean-Claude or Micah. Oh, how the mighty had fallen and all that jazz, but the arrogance naked in Pierette’s eyes showed that at least the ego hadn’t fallen that far.

  “I’m not saying that you aren’t fearsome on your own, Petra, but you can’t understand what he is, or you wouldn’t be this calm about using yourself as bait.”

  “I understand precisely what he is, and the fact that we’ve allowed him to continue living when he is a terrible threat to you is inexcusable.”

  “I’ll say what is and isn’t excusable,” I said.

  “That is your prerogative as queen, but if anyone had dared to threaten our old queen in such a manner, it would not have been tolerated.”