Stigmata

by L M Adams

  The two of them work over near the water’s edge while I lay by the fire and stare up at the sparkling sky.

  “See here? This is where we want to cut. I would give much for a knife right now, my sword is so large it will make our task difficult.”

  “I have my knife! The one you gave me.”

  “Oh, aye?”

  The work of skinning the croc goes faster with the smaller folding knife, all the while Lucien explaining and showing Jack how to do it himself.

  “Easy Capaneus, easy, we don’t want to rip the hide, we will need it to carry water with us.”

  “Who taught you how to do this? Did you learn this Jaevia?” Jack’s voice is almost full of wonder.

  I laugh, “I can do enough to survive, small mammals and such, maybe a deer, but I’d be lost on something so large. The Kindred didn’t teach us how to prepare crocodile.”

  Lucien grunts, “I learned from Bomani, I guess you could call him my foster father… long before I came to the Kindred; he taught me much in the ways of a simple life, hunting, gathering… caring for a place and living with the land.”

  “You sound like you miss it.”

  “Aye Bloodsucker, at times, I do. I did not take to… city living, but I manage it. It is just a different kind of wild, yes?”

  “But if you had your choice…”

  “I would go where Jaevia goes… she is always my choice.”

  And so I make a note, if we ever make it home, we will visit the countryside more often so that Lucien can have the things for happiness too.

  “Wench, do you plan on helping or lying about all night?”

  “I am queen!”

  “Aye, and a lazy one at that.”

  I sit up, “Hey!”

  “You could always be a good Wench and grind up the salt I brought back.”

  When he puts it like that, how can I say no? Even the goddess of life and death wants to be a good wench to the men she loves… somewhere deep, in her secret heart. I get up and grab the large blocks of white salt from beside the hut. He’d gone to find this, flying in the midday sun… so it must have been important.

  The blocks are large and rough and raw. He shows me how to use a stone to break up the salt and scrape it into one of his weaved baskets.

  Soon Jack comes over with a few pounds of his cut-up crocodile meat, I cover it in salt and lay it out to dry.

  Jack lays a few flat stones in the fire and places the meat on them to cook. “I’d give anything for a few chili peppers right now,” he sounds so sad.

  “It will still be a fine meal, Capaneus, come help me prepare the hide.”

  Jack rolls his eyes playfully before doing as master says.

  We work through the first half of the night, just butchering the crocodile, being sure to waste as little of it as possible. Lucien digs out a pit, lines it with stones and heats them with a thought until they glow red the dark night. We wrap the salted croc meat in the date palm leaves and set them down into the pit to cook. This is the meat we’ll take with us.

  After most of the work is done, Jack and Lucien join me by the fire and we eat the portion of meat Jack put on the rocks earlier – well Jack and I eat a portion, Lucien eats like five portions.

  “We will salt and clean the hide and let it set in the morning sun, we will have to cut, shape, and sew it before it becomes too rough.”

  “Luey…” I warn gently.

  “I will work only in the morning hours and sleep through the midday, abstaining from the sun from two hours before until two hours after. Still, we can pack and be ready to begin our journey by the sunset, the stars can set our path well.”

  I nod, “Okay, that’s the plan.”

  “But where are we going?” Jack asks.

  Lucien grunts, “If we are in a time of before – there is a village known as Me’tangua that sits along the Nile – there perhaps we can find help.”

  “Who on earth can help us with this?!”

  “Calm yourself Bloodsucker, I got us here, I can get us back. There are many that study the majics of time, people that have dedicated themselves to the learning of the majics… people like Henenu.” He adds in a whisper.

  Jack nods, seeming to calm down at the mention of Lucien’s old tutor. “Okay, to Me’tangua.”

  I sigh, “We shouldn’t rush to go home.”

  “What?” Jack asks me.

  “Luey should go to his home, see what’s there, find his people – we’re here for a reason, I know that. And it has to do with more than you wishing to show us where you grew up and us being transported to this now. Being here feels right.”

  “It does to you, but it doesn’t to me!” Jack says sharply.

  “I know you’re having a hard time, Jack, I know – but Lucien deserves the time to look for his people, find out what really happened.”

  Jack stands, “And what about home? Everyone is probably worried sick. Or how about our very presence in this time may destroy the entire timeline as we know it!”

  I would like to accuse him of being selfish, of only thinking of himself. But the simple truth is – he’s right. If nothing, our ordeals in New York taught us time is not something to meddled with – not even in the realm of gods.

  Yet I can’t shake the feeling that Luey is supposed to be here, this feels right. It doesn’t feel like an abuse of time, it feels like… a healing of a wound.

  Luey was supposed to be here now… him being in my time is what is unnatural. But then if I believe that, what does that mean for us?

  Because I know one thing – neither of us is willing to live without the other – in any time.

  We finish eating and Lucien gets back to work, not saying anything at all about my suggestion to find his home. I know it is a painful subject for him. He’d burned his village to the ground – and that’s a memory he’d rather not face, in any time.

  He goes back to the carcass and begins working on it again. From the outside, nothing seems wrong – but I feel the trouble in his heart. I look at Jack and know that he does as well.

  The firelight plays beautifully in Jack’s dark blue eyes. He looks at Lucien for a moment and nods slightly. “Okay Jae, okay.”

  I reach out and grab his hand, squeezing it for a moment before letting go.

  “Thank you,” I whisper thanking him truly for his sacrifice. We’ll be here for who knows how long, and he won’t have his powers, he will have to depend on us like never before. It will chafe at him like sandpaper and force him to face his own demons.

  Who is Capaneus Nicholas Jackson de la Fountaine without the magic and power of the cursed men? Who is Jack Knightley, son of Isis?

  Lucien stands. “It will get deathly cold soon, I will place rocks around our shelter and heat them. You two should go rest, we will have a hard day tomorrow.”

  “I can help…”

  “Go, Bloodsucker, you need the rest,” he says firmly.

  I stand up and dust the sand from my ass. Jack sighs but gets up and walks with me back to our little shelter. Jack takes off his pants before joining me on our little palm leaf mat. I get comfortable, laying on Jack’s chest, he cuddles me lightly with one arm.

  We hear Lucien moving about outside, stacking stones around the hut to give us heat through the night. But soon, he moves away.

  “We owe him this,” I whisper.

  “I know we do… I know,” Jack rubs my arms lightly. “I am only upset at my own inadequacies.”

  “You know, you may have other connections… to Gaia, to Isis – you are a son of Eve.”

  “I’d rather not talk about it, Jaevia.”

  I sigh defeated, already knowing the problem. Jack doesn’t believe he deserves the powers of Isis. He is the descendant of Cain, Cain killed the true son, Cain killed Abel. How could he have rights to the powers of the brother he’d killed? Let alone Set and his treachery – Jack just comes from a long line of dipshits and he seems determined to suffer for all of their sins.

  “
Okay,” I whisper, knowing there is nothing I can do but be supportive and wait until he is ready to talk about it.

  “Sleep Jae,” he rubs my arm gently and I find myself lulled in his comfort. Even without his powers, Jack’s very nature is to be a soothing balm.

  I dream of wild animals and smiling human faces, I dream of the ocean and the earth and of the heavens above… I dream of a purer existence. A place where I don’t have to fight so goddamn much and bleed with the wounds of betrayal so often. I dream of this being my home.

  “Why are you still awake, Bloodsucker?”

  Lucien’s deep, soft voice brings my consciousness floating to the surface a bit.

  “Waiting for you,” Jack murmurs back and rubs my arm absentmindedly.

  “Oh aye?” Lucien settles on the other side of Jack.

  “For some damn reason I can’t really relax without the both of you close.”

  “You love us, this is the reason.”

  “It’s more than that. I am… I depend on you two very deeply…”

  “Is this not what love is?”

  “No,” Jack sigh, “this is codependency.”

  “No, this is letting your husband and wife take care of you, the same way we let you take care of us, hmm?”

  Jack moans, and the sound of kisses begins.

  “Please don’t,” he begs.

  “I need you.”

  68

  Jack

  He kisses my neck, near my ear, right where he knows I like it, as his hand rubs my thigh lightly, high up near my sack and ever hardening cock. Jaevia’s light breathing on my chest doing nothing but adding another layer of desire.

  She ripped every bit of come from my body, we both paid tribute to her in the way she demanded, yet still, my body reacts to Lucien.

  “Shh,” he whispers again as the tears begin to fall. “You are loved.”

  His hand reaches my cock and I bite down on my bottom lip to keep from losing my shit. He only rubs it a bit, over my underwear, but my soul feels like it’s being burned alive.

  “Breathe, you have to breathe through the panic attack, you have to take control.”

  “Please, stop touching it… please. You said I have control… then stop.” I beg through clenched teeth.

  “I will stop touching your cock, if you relax your muscles, Capaneus, you are far too tense for this light touch I am giving you.”

  “I can’t stand it, please, I can’t stand it.” I beg him low. “I am dying inside, please I can’t stand it, please hear me, I can’t stand it.” I’m struggling to stay quiet and still, to not disturb Jaevia, but I am at my limit!

  “All right, all right,” He moves to lay beside me and takes his hand away from my crotch.

  Immediately my tension eases, I hate that it goes away so quickly and the yearning for his love returns just as viciously. Goddess help me, please don’t give up Lucien, please don’t give up on me. I think I would die if he called quits on our private little war. God help me, I need him to win.

  I will never understand… Why can’t I have him? Why can’t I just give myself unto him? Why is this my curse? To have all that I’ve ever wished, and not be able to enjoy it.

  Have I truly been that evil? Do I truly deserve such a heart wrenching punishment?

  We’re quiet for a long time as Lucien lets me wrangle my emotions back under control again.

  “Quiet your heart, Capaneus, I will not touch you so intimately. You are safe from my desires,” he sighs deeply.

  “I’m sorry Lucien, I’m just too raw… losing my powers, being here… it’s too much already. I can’t manage it all right now.”

  “I understand, Capaneus, no need to explain, hmm? We will try again after I get you safely from the wilderness, I know you hate it here…”

  “I don’t hate it; I’m just not used to it.” I lie easily, because what husband wants his husband to hate his very birthlands?

  “Aye you do, and this is acceptable… you like nice things. The Wench does not let me pamper her… so I will pamper you instead.”

  I huff, “You make me sound like a baby.”

  “No, just a man that demands a certain level of care.”

  There really isn’t any point in denying it… “I really am not made for roughing it.” I sound sad to my own ears.

  He chuckles low, “What does the Wench call you?”

  “Boujie,” I roll my eyes as his deep manly laugh fills the space.

  “No fear, soon I will pamper you with a plush bed and luxurious sheets…”

  “I’d give anything for a bath…”

  “You can have a bath too, with exotic oils while you sip on fine wines… you can have anything you want.”

  My liking nice things has never bothered me, not really. I’ve always grown up with a certain expectation of how I would live. But now, here… my knowledge of objet d’art or the size of my bank account doesn’t count for much.

  I look at his strong profile, “Honestly, you don’t think I’m… frivolous?”

  He shrugs, “Yes, but so what if you are. I knew who I was marrying.”

  His simplistic view about being with me… helps. Much like him, I knew who I was marrying – an overbearing, roughhewn, wild hearted man. I wouldn’t want him to change one bit, can it be so odd then that he would feel the same? That he likes me the way that I am with no stipulations?

  “Now hush, go to sleep.”

  I huff, “Yes, Lucien.”

  His steady breathing and Jae’s steady heartbeat lull me to sleep easily, cocooned between the two people I love most in this world, our world… any world. Yes, I hate it here, but how could I truly hate any place where I have them both?

  I make up my mind to really try tomorrow, to give it my all to acclimate and find ways that I can belong here. After all, if Jaevia has her way, we’ll be here for some time.

  The thought scares me a bit less when I’m in the safe arms of my clutch and I drift to sleep with an easy heart to dream of plush beds and exotic baths.

  Lucien is up before either me or Jaevia, greeting the first breaking of the sun. Even after sleeping in a bit, I feel exhausted still, the very air here seems to sap the energy from my body. Or perhaps this is what being human feels like, and it’s been so long since I’ve been human, I’ve forgotten how weary a body can get.

  My only source of hope that this is not permanent, I do still have my fangs, I do get a boost from drinking blood, and I do feel Vayrá, even as far and small as she is. I am still vampire, whatever that means in this time and place.

  The sun shines down on us as we clean up in the crystal-clear waters of the oasis. None of us afraid of the water now that Sobek has welcomed us so graciously. Not really sure I’ll ever truly understand that, or what happened last night.

  I rub down my skin in the water, trying my best to get clean. No soap, no perfumed oils… no bath towels…

  If this is Lucien’s idea of pampering me with a bath, he’s got a lot to learn.

  I have never been one to live on the land, off the land, in tune with the land. My life has never been aligned with nature, my very existence, the seed of my powers – is by definition, unnatural. I am dead flesh walking with the living – feeding off the living. I am a man without a soul, one with the demimonde – the half-life. I do not live within the natural order of things and I’ve never been more aware of that fact as I am right now.

  “Here, Bloodsucker,” Lucien says handing me a… a… not sure what it is as I get out of the water.

  I take it gingerly; it looks like one of his palm leaf baskets but smaller and with a wide brim all around.

  Realization fills me, along with horror.

  “I’d rather burn to death,” I say with all seriousness.

  “Be a good boy,” he snatches it out of my hand and plops it on my head.

  I hear a giggle and turn to see Jaevia wearing one herself, grinning like a loon. Well it looks fetching on her; I know I look like a complete idiot. I am a
goddamn king of the blood!

  I reach up to snatch it off, Lucien frowns. “If you take it off, I’ll put you over my knee.”

  My hand drops away from the hat as I decide looking like I’m about to play a banjo at a hoedown is infinitesimally less embarrassing than being put over his knee and given a spanking.

  I swallow my anger and brush past him, but I don’t get away before he slaps me on my bare bottom, making me slink further into my embarrassment.

  We have breakfast and begin the day’s tasks quickly.

  Lucien has seen to salting and cleaning the croc hide. He shows me how to cut the pattern so we can sew it into waterskins. Jaevia is given the task of collecting riper dates that have fallen from the trees. She balances one of the palm leaf weaved baskets on her hip, wearing only her panties, her tank, and her blaring green palm-leaf hat. Her body sways to music only she can hear, smiling as she maneuvers between the bask of sunbathing crocodiles without a care in the world.

  I don’t think I’ve ever seen her so happy, so unburdened.

  Even Lucien, dark body glistening in the sun as he works seems more right here than he ever has anywhere else. It’s me that doesn’t belong, that feels alien.

  But if this gives them so much happiness, is it not my duty to suffer my discomfort as their slave, in silence and tranquility?

  We work through the morning but as soon as midday approaches, Lucien calls for us to go to hide from the sun. Even the crocs leave their sunbathing and head for the deep waters or the shade of the trees. This is Ra’s time, and we must all respect it as such.

  Lucien lays down on his back, hands folded behind his head and sleeps, or perhaps meditates, concentrating on maintaining control as the air is saturated with the power of his god.

  I should be able to help him with this. But Neoma is not there for me.

  The blistering heat comes and beats down on us unrelenting, even in the enclosure. Perhaps I didn’t notice it yesterday because I was so busy worshipping Jaevia’s goddess and having my lifeforce ripped from me through my cock – that the ambient temperature wasn’t really a concern at the time.