The Covenant of Shadows Collection

by Kade Cook

  “I know.” She nods, glancing at him, and takes a breath, wanting to remove herself from all of this. Finding solace in the moment, she shifts the conversation. “Cimmerian has offered to help me,” she reveals to him, struggling to pull herself free from the sadness with the hope to change the mood in the room.

  “Really…well, that is wonderful. You should take him up on his offer. He is a bit peculiar at times, not to mention masterfully sullen, but if you can get past all that, I am certain that you will do great things,” Matthias assures, watching her bite at the edge of her lips. “And…if you need me for anything, I am always happy to help.”

  She sees him. She feels the conviction in his voice and trusts that he will, even if she does not deserve his show of devotion. “Please don’t tell anyone about this, promise me.” Her eyes plead with him, glassing over once more. Her innards twist and her heart pounds beneath her bones in harmony with the thunderous beating of raindrops the heavens have unleashed on the sidewalk just beyond the other side of the glass window.

  “Don’t worry, I promise.” He pulls her in close, wrapping his arms around her in a protective hug and smiles, kissing the top of her head. Feeling her surrender to his gesture, he hopes this may be the perfect opportunity for him to slip back into her life and secure it for good. “What are friends for?”

  45

  LETTING GO

  Locating the familiar hum of Gabrian’s essence, Shane fumbles through the shadows of the Veil, his mind still groggy from the deep sleep that had kept him captive way too tightly and longer than normal. He appears in the alleyway just outside the Coffee Hound, his chest pounding in his ears, panicked, and his hand cradling the heart stone within it. The wet blanket of rain soaks his skin and his ears pick up on a throaty cackling coming from above the building behind. Theo, Gabrian’s ever stalking groupie on duty, greets him and alerts him of his presence—discern in his call. Shane steps out of the shadow and closer to the large window of the coffee bar.

  Shane’s hazy mind clears without haste as he glares through the glass, searching for understanding. His fear of her absence dissipates but melds into a rush of heated and confused fury. Not feeling the bite of the cold rain nipping at his skin any longer, he is mesmerized by the scene unfolding before him, throat rumbling as he lets out a savage growl. A slight vapor of steam rises from his flesh with the elevation of his body’s temperature, fueled by hatred.

  Shane tightens his eyes as they watch Matthias’s hands graze across the small of Gabrian’s back and gather behind her, gripping her shirt within his brazen fingers. His body cloaks her small frame as he pulls her in tight to touch his stomach against her chest and cradle her head beneath his chin. He lips touch her hair with a seductive kiss, his eyes rolling back in his head for a moment then flare open, sensing his audience. Finding Shane, he kisses her once more, revealing the wickedness within, and sends the Schaeduwe a message of his smug intentions.

  Shane stands statuesque, calling on all of his inner strength to maintain his position and resist from busting through the picture window to rip out the spine of the snake before him, knowing Gabrian would never forgive him if he did.

  “Um, I think we have an audience.”

  “What?” Gabrian says, pulling away from Matthias’s tender embrace.

  “I do believe that someone may be looking for you.”

  She turns her head and finds the eyes of her seeker—a heartbroken sea of green stares back at her, making the burden of guilt seem even heavier, and adds to the sharpness of her self-hatred. She pulls out of Matthias’ arms, imagining how this must look to Shane—not privy to the real reason she is here—and feels like an outsider just as she has for so long.

  Gabrian screams within her silence.

  What is wrong with me?

  She is the cause of this pain. Once again, her selfish need to rendezvous with someone Shane has so much distrust for, and behind his back no less—caught within his arms—even as innocent as it is, it is not—no, not entirely.

  “He doesn’t look very happy,” Matthias says, pecking her on the cheek, and flashes a grin in Shane’s direction, meant only for his eyes. His deliberate attempt to infuriate the onlooker goes unnoticed by Gabrian as she gathers her things from the stool.

  Shane’s nostril flare but he makes no attempt to move. He rests, awaiting her retreat from the wanton suitor’s manipulative company, but his mind is raging. Although relieved that she is okay, Shane loathes the situation he finds her in.

  “I have to go,” she says softly, hearing Shane’s concern for her safety in his thoughts deluded with murderous intentions toward her chosen keep. She quickly finishes putting her coat on and turns to address Matthias. “Thank you for meeting with me and letting me unload on you. It means more than you know.”

  “Yes, of course. Remember I am here for you, any time you need me,” he offers, his smirk replaced by a sincere soft pout for her benefit, hoping to ensure his latch on her emotional needs. He offers her a slight grip of comforting support with his hand on her elbow as she slips by him and takes her leave to deal with the raging Shadow Walker outside—leaving behind the warm, dry sanctuary of the Coffee Hound to trudge toward the confused, wet, and livid Shane Kage standing in the pouring rain.

  Slowly, taking the necessary steps to reach him, Gabrian frowns up and sees the residing terror in his eyes. The colour no longer the usual turquoise green of a tranquil sea but an eerie dark jade forest, holding more monsters in its shadows than she probably wants to know about. He takes her by the hand, gently leading her back into the shroud of the shadows behind them—no longer in the eye of intentional eavesdroppers.

  Gabrian takes a breath, readying to explain, when he unleashes his fears.

  “Are you all right?” Tears welling at the corner of his eyes soften the harshness of the forest within them. The disdain boiling in him for the scum just touching her is dropped and dismissed into nothing. It is not Gabrian that is the deception in Shane’s mind, it is Matthias, the disgusting excuse for a being that he is. “Did something happen to you?”

  She shakes her head from side to side, confused by his switch in mood. Rage replaced by concern for her wellbeing, he grabs her gently by the wrist and pulls up her sleeve in search for something. “Where is it?” He twists her arm front to back as he searches. “Where is your heart stone?”

  Not wanting to tell him what she has done, she pulls her arm away from his grip, slipping the sleeve back down. “It’s gone.”

  “I know it’s gone. I felt it disappear,” he says, his hand instinctively rising to rub his own stone bound within the leather binding hanging from his neck. “I thought you were dead.”

  “What?”

  “The heart stone, remember?” he snaps at her, not meaning to. He takes a deep breath, trying to release the torturous animal of fear still pumping adrenaline wildly within him. “It sings as long as its other half is close to its keeper. It lets me know that you are alive and well. And when it stopped, I woke up—the emptiness of the hum, searing my skin—trying desperately to rip me from the consuming state of slumber.”

  Not realizing that removing it and giving it to Rachael would do this, she understands more of the angst in his entrance.

  “When I finally pulled myself out, I rushed into the shadows to find you. Gabrian, I am sorry for being angry with you, but I thought that you were dead.” He pants, rubbing his hands through his drenched curls. “I thought I had lost you… My heart being ripped apart within the nightmare of believing it, especially after I have only just found you.”

  Her heart aches in her chest at hearing him confess his undying conviction to her preservation. It is more than she can stand. “You didn’t lose me, I gave it away.”

  “I don’t understand. Why would you…”

  “I had to…” she says, trying to find her voice. “I had to fix what I have done, and Madorrah told me to do it.”

  “What?” Shane nearly barks out the word.


  “She told me to bend the rules. I knew she wasn’t going to cave on giving me a stone, no matter what I said her or how many times I tried to convince her, so after I was done being upset with the old bat, I listened to her—to what she was really saying—the message within the message.”

  Shane’s brow twists, confused in what riddle she is speaking to him.

  Gabrian continues, seeing his confusion, but starts to pace in front of him, treading through the puddles emerging in the alley. “And so I left while you were sleeping and went to the hospital. I snuck into her room, to give my stone to her, but when I took it off to give to Rachael, it wouldn’t go. It refused her. I couldn’t believe…I refused to believe my attempt was futile. But then Madorrah’s words awoke inside my mind and told me I have to bend the rules. So, I did. I tied it onto her neck. If it helps her, if it can help her find her way back, then it is worth it. And I am sorry if you don’t understand, something inside my heart tells me it will. I didn’t do it to hurt you.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I couldn’t,” she says, stepping away from him, not wanting to see that look.

  “Yes, you could have, Gabrian. You can tell me anything, I would do anything to…”

  “I know you would, I know!” Gabrian yells out at him, throwing her arms in the air then weaves her hands deep within her wet tangled mess of hair. “You would do anything to help me, you would do anything for me—like give up your entire life for what I want, what I need…and I know…?” Gabrian hesitates, burying her head between her arms and lets them wrap around, veiling her for a moment from the swirl of emotion. Then she stops, letting them drop, and whispers to him in a pitchy voice, “I can’t do this anymore.”

  Shane’s heart begins to pound in his ears, the words carrying a meaning he does not want to understand, and he wants her to stop what he knows she is going to say.

  “I can’t do this anymore…” she repeats, turning to face the gentle giant before her—the one she is going to destroy but save with the same breath. “I can’t stand by and idly watch as you continuously throw away your life, your desires, and your needs, always putting me and my life first, ahead of yours. It’s not right, Shane. It’s not fair.”

  “Gabrian, don’t…it’s not like that.”

  “It’s exactly like that, Shane,” she says, no longer able to see either of them suffocate because of the position they are in. “We both know it.”

  “I took an oath…”

  “Yes, and I am dissolving you of your oath and all that binds you to it. I am relinquishing you of your duties as a Guardian to the silver bloodline—to me.”

  “But I love you…”

  “I know you do… oh man, do I know. I love you too…and that is why I have to let you go and give you back your life. I can’t watch you sacrifice everything you are to stand in my shadow. I can’t look you in the eye anymore without feeling the guilt of knowing it is all my fault, knowing I am not worthy of your sacrifice—that I have stolen your life from you just like I did with Rachael.”

  “That’s not what this is…”

  “But it will be if I don’t end this now.”

  A tremor of fear rips through her soul hearing the words fall from her lips, regretting their sound but celebrating their meaning—hoping he will not hate her forever for giving him back his freedom. She lifts her hand to cup his jaw, feeling the sting of loneliness already setting in as his sea green turns in his irises with a haunting shade of blue, revealing the pain his soul must be drowning in—the same swell of pain that threatens to make her take it all back, knowing he would let her. But she will not, she cannot. Willing her feet to move, before she drops to the ground, Gabrian takes her first steps forward, away from the pain she knows is killing them both.

  “Gabrian, wait…” he whimpers, reaching out to grasp her hand as she steps away and disappears into the heavy sheet of rain, making her a ghost within the tears that pour down from the Gods as they mourn for him.

  It is all he can do not to scream, to call out her name through the unrelenting storm of pain just unleashed within, to tell her to stay…that he needs her to stay.

  But he won’t.

  He will remain her protector still, whether she likes it or not—even if it means he must love and protect her from the shadows, he will do so. But he will never be selfish. He will never put his heart first and ask her to stay if she does not want to, even if it kills him.

  46

  STRANGE EXCHANGE

  The cold sting of the rain slips away unnoticed as Gabrian follows her feet, wandering in no particular direction. Drowning with emotions and choking on the words she wishes she could take back, her mind is torn between knowing she has done the right thing and clinging to guilt of her selfish reasons for ending things. Letting him go is the only way she can free herself from the weight she carries of watching him throw his life away because of her. They both will be better for it, even though it feels like hell now. Shane will be better for it. He just doesn’t know it yet.

  The dusk to dawn streetlamp shines like a halo around her as she steps in front of the college campus. Wiping the dampness away from her eyes, partly due to the rain and mostly due to the pain seeping out from within, Gabrian looks up from her feet and the large wooden doors of the Turret building beckons to her. The image of Cimmerian’s sickly-sweet smile enters her head and his melted voice offering to help her whispers through her ears.

  Not realizing she had wandered so far away from her car trying to out walk the pain, she decides that she may as well get it over with. She is here now and having to see his face will not ruin her mood any worse than it already is.

  Her feet touch the walkway that leads to the doors—each step heavy, knowing she is allowing someone else to be in charge of her life once more. Reaching the top of the steps, she pushes on the large doors, hearing them groan in protest to her entry, but they give way just the same, making her dread who she is here to see a little more prominent. Normally, these doors open easy and hold the promise of comradery but today is not the case. Instead, she is on a different mission. Not knowing exactly where she is going, she heads straight to the directory on the far wall, in search for a name.

  Her eyes scroll down the list of present professors, seeing a few names she has heard whispered within the Realm but not the one she seeks. Retracing her search from the top, she finally sees it.

  Professor Cole – Dark Arts Room 313 Lower Level – Section D

  Making a quick stop at the college lavatory she is already acquainted with, Gabrian tries her best to wipe away the rest of the wetness from her rain soaked hair so she, at least, is not dripping everywhere when she finds her new instructor. Checking quickly in the mirror, she calls it good enough and exits, heading for the stairs.

  She slowly descends, hearing her steps echo loudly against the bare walls to announce her presence to all within earshot. Her mind drifts helplessly back to the image of Shane’s pain-filled eyes and his quivering lower lip, trying to remain unshaken as her sharp words sliced at his heart. She feels the water welling again as she sinks into the travesty her only real relationship has become.

  Rounding the corner at the bottom of the landing, a young man appears, almost from out of nowhere, taking her by surprise and making her gasp. Why had she not heard him on the stairs or at least sensed him—this kind of thing never happens anymore, making her leery.

  Their eyes meet. The yellowish hue that dances around his irises sparkles—matching the colour of his golden hair—but she is transfixed by something else, his pupils. They are wide and inviting, much like the half grin warming his face as he passes by. This strange exchange between them dances to the foreground of her attention for what seems like minutes maybe even hours to Gabrian, caught in a silent rapture of peacefulness, until his eyes blink. The boy’s pupils flex, stretching wide across his irises into a straight line, much like that of a cat’s but inverted diagonally—shocking her—breaking the trance.
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  She looks away, just for a moment, but it is too long. Her eyes now strain as she stares into the emptiness that remains. She halts her descent and chases the memory of the young man up the stairs, but he is gone—nothing left but the sound of her breath and the echo of her movements in the empty stairwell—leaving her alone again on her trek to seek out Cimmerian.

  “Huh,” she breathes out, perplexed, and purses her lips, restarting her course.

  With her mind preoccupied on the young man, she forgets to watch for the signage on the walls—her thoughts replaying the mirage in more detail as she wanders through the corridors of the lower levels, lost in her daydream. A voice cuts through the images in her head, disrupting her silent journey. “Miss Shadwell, are you lost?” it says, halting Gabrian in her steps. “Can I help you find something?”

  She refocuses her eyes and looks around at her surroundings, completely overshooting her voyage through the halls. Growling inwardly at herself, she back steps toward the voice and pokes her head inside the open door, biting on the inside of her lower lip, then replies to his question. “Um, no…I,” she clears the rough itchy catch in her throat and continues, “I came to see you.”

  Setting his pen down and raising his eyes from the papers lying before him, Cimmerian allows her his attention and swallows down his discontent with her presence, even though it was he who had asked her to come find him when she was ready. He rues the day that he met her, wishing he could make her and all the entanglements within the web around her—namely Adrinn—go away. His mind slips to a dark place as he fantasises a world free of all this torment which she represents, if only there were some way to erase her from his life but still reap sympathy from the fiend within the mist in order to gain his aid—an accident maybe, leaving his hands clean.