One Little Bit

by Tey Holden

  “Okay, because that’s the way it should be. Do you think you should go there now?”

  “No. All is fine now. My obligation is with Laurie only. I have no obligation with him.” She paused. “And what did you exactly mean when you said this thing about me choosing you?”

  “Well—.”

  “Why wouldn’t I? He had his chance for many years, and he was the one who couldn’t get it together. He lost me, many years before I even met you. And I can’t believe that after all the time we’ve been together you still think that I’m not here 100%. You are not an after-thought or a second choice. Damn it, Ker! You are my life. What will it take for you to get it?”

  Addy’s words and demeanor shocked Karen. “The past is gone and all that’s left of it is Laurie. I love her, and I love Alex. They are my children. I don’t ever want you to belittle yourself to someone who never measured up to even your ankles! Ever! You will always come first. I need to know that we are clear on that.”

  Speechless, Karen nodded and came to Addy’s arms, then whispered, “I love you.”

  Addy tightened her embrace. “Me too.”

  Part 10

  Even though Alex slept through most of the night, whenever she even so much as hiccupped, both women ran to her side. Seeing how exhausted and worried Karen was over anything related to Alex, Addy had proposed that she would be the one getting up and that Karen would stay in bed to rest. It hadn’t been long since the surgery, and Karen still needed to regain more of her strength. Even with that arrangement, ever vigilant and protective, Karen always remained awake in bed waiting for Addy’s return to get a full report of events.

  One night, Alex wouldn’t stop crying. They did everything they knew to do and nothing worked. They called Jenna, and it was concluded, based on the information provided, that Alex was constipated and had a stomachache. “Do you have any baby glycerin suppositories?”

  Both women looked at each other. “No, Jenna, we don’t. We didn’t think to purchase anything like that.” Karen replied. “In that case, you might want to use the rectal thermometer with a bit of petroleum jelly to gently stimulate her. Just use it as if you were taking her rectal temperature. That ought to do it. If she continues to be fussy give me a call again.”

  As soon as Addy hung up, Karen made her proclamation. “I’m not doing it. I’d be afraid to hurt her, and you are the expert in the constipation field, anyway.” Addy looked at her narrowing her eyes in a menacing, yet endearing, stare. Karen was referring to a time during Karen’s pregnancy when she had suffered from constipation, and Addy had to assist with the insertion of a certain medication because Karen was having a difficulty reaching and finding a certain part of her body.

  “Oh, for God’s sake, Karen, you heard what Jenna said. Let me have the thermometer, we need to sterilize it with alcohol first and then put on the petroleum jelly.” Barely inserting the tip of the thermometer was sufficient stimulation for Alex to empty her stomach in a torrent and all over Addy.

  “Oh, my God, Addy!”

  “No wonder the poor kid was crying so much. She was all clogged! We are going to have to talk to Jenna about what to do to prevent this constipation business.” Addy declared while looking at the mess on her.

  Karen chuckled. “Here, go change. You are full of it.” Karen couldn’t help laughing. “I’ll take care of our pooping machine here.” Once again, Addy gave her the ‘look,’ but Karen continued to laugh.

  From the bathroom, Addy yelled, “Ker, I’m going to have to take a shower, this is major.”

  Still laughing, Karen replied. “Okay, take your time. I’m taking care of the little monster here.”

  A while later, when Addy came back, Karen was talking to a now quiet, happy and wide-eyed Alex. “Alexandra, you sure are making it hard on Mommy Addy. Shitting on her is not going to get you many brownie points. Oh, no!”

  Addy chuckled when she overheard the conversation. “What?” What now? Did she poop again?”

  “Yeap, fortunately, this time I was prepared. This one is not going to catch me by surprise!” Karen had her in a diaper, which was still unfastened to check for new developments. “You know? I could have sworn that she smiled when I told her she was making it hard on you with all the crap.”

  Addy chuckled. “Ha, ha, looks like your mommy here is having lots of fun at my expense. Are you making fun of me also, Little Bit?” Alex was very lively and happy now that she had emptied herself. “I can see another pair of green eyes taking advantage of me!” Addy was bent over talking to Alex, who was lying on the changing table. Karen went for Addy’s neck and sucked it. She then let go. “If you are going to complain, do it with a reason!” She smiled seductively.

  Addy chuckled and turned around to leave while Karen fastened the diaper, dressed, and held the happy little one in her arms. “Get her to sleep and then come and give me more reasons to complain.” She left for the bedroom, leaving Karen with a very awake baby in her arms. On her way out, she turned the nursery light off, leaving on just the night lite.

  The baby monitor was on and Addy could hear the conversation between mother and daughter. “Okay, Alexandra, you have five minutes to go to sleep. This is no time for playing, not for you anyways. You are actually infringing on my playtime. I don’t know what you are going to do with your brownie points, but I do, and I need to go cash them in.”

  Addy chuckled in bed. Not going to happen! She knew the little one was too wound up. Soon, she heard Karen talking to the baby again. “Oh, Fuck! I give up. For being so little you sure make a lot of fuss! Mommy Addy is all crazy about you. I want you to know that you are very lucky that I’m willing to share her with you.” Karen knew the monitor was on, so she smiled and kept talking pretending she was unaware that she was being overheard. “You have no idea how lucky you are to have that woman love you. I guess we both are.” Karen was thoughtful and quiet for a while. “She’ll tell you how beautiful you are and, of course, in your case that would be true. You are cute.” Karen chuckled when she saw the little one looking at her with her huge green eyes as she sucked on her pacifier. “She’ll say you have my eyes, and how she loves them. She does love them, and you do have my eyes. How did this happen, Little Bit? How is it possible that we love you so much?”

  In bed, Addy was enchanted listening to the conversation. “You are so beautiful. You are like a little doll. I never liked dolls, but I like you. Who would have thought that I’d be playing with dolls at my age, or at any age?” Karen chuckled. “What that woman has done to me is beyond belief. You are here because of her, you know? And look at me! What am I going to do with you?” And then she started to sing. “Twinkle, twinkle little star—.”

  Addy grinned in the other bedroom. Later when Karen finally came to bed, thinking that Addy was asleep, she kissed her and tucked herself in bed. A few minutes later she felt Addy spooning her and whispering in her ear. “This is your constipation expert—.” Karen laughed and squirmed in Addy’s arms as Addy proceeded to tickle her.

  “You are terrible. Don’t embarrass me!” She turned around and snuggled to her.

  “I didn’t know such a thing was possible.”

  Karen nodded and rubbed her face to Addy’s neck. “I love being like this with you. I love all you do and don’t do.”

  “I do too.” She said before kissing her on the head.

  ***

  All the medical checkups had been fine with mother and daughter. Alex was growing perfectly well and was a very healthy baby. At about four months it was time for Alex to have her first solid food.

  “Okay, we need to put her in the baby high-chair.” Karen held her and sat and buckled her with the chair’s seat belt. Until now, Alex had never used the chair. The times she had been upright had been usually on her mothers’ bed propped with pillows, or on their laps. The minute Karen let go of her in the high-chair, Alex began to lean to one side, and it didn’t take very long before she was completely slumped to one side of the chair. “U
mm, it’s going to be difficult to feed you in that position.” Karen talked to her daughter, while Alex smiled and banged the chair’s tray with her hands, apparently enjoying her unusual position.

  Addy bit her lips watching the developing situation. She was resolved to let Karen handle it, first because she wanted Karen to feel useful, and second because Karen needed to have her own experiences with her daughter. She had already gone through all the trials and errors of motherhood with Laurie and now it was Karen’s turn.

  “No, this is not going to work.” She went upstairs to the linen closet and brought two medium size towels rolled them up and set them on Alex’s left and right side. Alex now sat perfectly straight on her chair but fussing over what appeared to be a tight spot. Addy continued to pretend that she was busy in the kitchen while observing the whole scene.

  “What do you think, Addy?”

  “Don’t know Ker, she doesn’t look all that happy to me.”

  As if on cue, the moment Addy finished talking, Alex began to cry and to turn red. Karen had to dismantle the whole arrangement and get her out of the chair to calm her down.

  “I don’t know how this is going to work if I can’t prop her up in there.” She looked at Addy in desperation hoping for any suggestion. When no suggestion came, after Alex calmed down, Karen sat her back in the chair. This time she only put one rolled towel on the side that Alex was leaning towards and because that left more room for her to wiggle, Alex looked happier.

  Enjoying her success, Karen tied a huge bib around Alex’s neck. When Alex became aware of the bib, she grabbed it and pulled it. As she pulled it, the bib tightened around her neck and she got restless again. Karen, who had gone to get the baby food, had to intervene when Alex again, began to cry. “Geez, kid, can’t you just sit still for a minute?” Whether it was the tone of Karen’s voice or the fact that the bib was tighter around her neck, Alex was in such a state of frenzy that Karen had to take her out of the chair once again to calm her.

  Seeing the chaotic situation and hoping to make Karen feel better, Addy decided to help to a certain extent. “Here, let me hold her and you feed her. Maybe she’s not ready to sit on the chair yet.”

  “Yeah, you may be right.”

  “Let’s get rid of the bib also, if she gets dirty we’ll clean her later.” Addy further suggested in order to facilitate matters.

  “Okay.”

  Addy sat on a chair and held a very happy Alex on her lap. Karen came with the baby food and the little rubber spoon to begin the feeding. She placed the spoonful of baby food in front of Alex’s mouth and Alex just looked at it and smiled. It only took the second that Addy looked from Alex to Karen for Alex to wave her little hands in the air in an attempt to grab the spoon, and in so doing, hit the spoon and the baby food fell on the leg of Alex’s pajama. “Oh crap, this is not a good start!” Karen cleaned the spilled food and again she put the spoon in front of Alex’s mouth. Again, nothing happened. Addy bit her lip trying not to laugh.

  “Addy, this is not working. How do I get her to open her mouth, so that I can get the spoon inside?”

  “Maybe if you brought the spoon to her lips so that she can taste the food, she might open her lips.”

  Karen did as instructed, and when Alex felt the food on her lips, she shivered and made all sorts of funny faces. Both women laughed. “Oh my God! Addy, look at her face!”

  When Alex realized that she was the center of attention, she got very animated and began to wave her arms in the air. Suddenly in her happy frenzy, she hit Karen’s hand and the spoon flew off into the air and landed on the floor. “Oh shit!” Karen leaned down to get the spoon to wash it, but before she bent over, she placed the plate with the baby food on the high-chair tray, which was next to them. The minute Addy saw it, she tried to get it, but it was already too late. Little happy arms waving in the air pushed the bowl of baby food, and it landed on Karen’s head as she was coming up from picking up the spoon.

  Addy thought she was going to have a heart attack laughing. She helped Karen up while still holding Alex with her other arm, then she sat and buckled Alex in the high-chair to continue to help Karen, who seemed uncertain as of whether she should laugh or cry. The little one was all smiles now sitting very straight on her throne and waving her little hands in the air, and pounding the high chair tray, not knowing the havoc she had caused. The little hands were covered with baby food, which immediately went to her hair and face, not to mention the bib sitting on the tray, and all over the tray itself. But, of course, most of the baby food was on Karen’s hair. Karen grabbed some paper towels to clean herself and the mess on the chair, while Addy laughed and wiped Alex hands using wet paper towels.

  “Adriana, is there anything you want to tell me? Or something you want to do? Like attempting to feed the little monster? Look at all this mess! And she hasn’t even opened her mouth yet! I don’t think she gets it! I think we are going to need help with this! We need to read some books on baby feeding.” The intellectual Karen thought that the solution to everything was written up somewhere. As she cleaned herself, she licked some baby food on her finger. “Oh my God! This food tastes like crap! No wonder she won’t open her mouth! Maybe we should fix something good for her to eat.”

  “Like what? A hamburger?” Addy smiled.

  Karen made a funny face. “No, but maybe she’d go for some mashed potatoes or maybe real mashed carrots? God knows what that is!”

  “Give me that!” She took the bowl from Karen’s hands. “You can’t even get her to open her mouth and you are talking about preparing food for her? I don’t think so, missy! We are trusting Gerber for now, I don’t want to risk diarrhea, more constipation, or God knows what else!”

  Karen grinned. She liked it when Addy got all worked up. “Look at her now. How come she’s sitting so upright now? I think our angel is no angel! I think she was leaning to the side on purpose.” Karen noted in an admonishing tone, which made Alex lose her smile again.

  “Hush, woman, you are going to make her cry again.” Addy took a bit of baby food from the bowl and with the tip of the spoon she pried open Alex’s lips. Addy didn’t give her any time. The minute Alex parted her lips, the spoon was inside her mouth. Alex made all sorts of faces again and not knowing what to do, pushed the food out of her mouth. Addy scooped it up and did the same thing again until Alex finally caught on and took some of the food in. Karen was watching the whole demonstration.

  “Okay, Okay, show off! I get it. Let me try it now.” Although she had been unsuccessful, she was not the type to give up. Karen began the process, just as Addy had done a few seconds earlier. It was all going well, and she began to feel very proud of herself.

  “That’s it. What a smart girl you are! You got it, baby, you’ve got it!” She was excitedly talking to Alex, and Alex smiled, liking the attention she was getting. “I think she finally got it, Addy, look she’s doing just fine now.”

  What Karen didn’t realize was that taking the food in her mouth did not mean that she was swallowing it. Karen was so thrilled with the fact that Alex was accepting the food that she didn’t realize that Alex’s mouth was full. Alex’s mouth was so full she didn’t know what to do with the food, so the obvious happened. She spat it all out, totally spraying Karen’s face.

  “Oh my God! What the fuck!” Karen jumped back, startled by the sudden and unexpected blow of food on her face. Karen’s startled reaction scared Alex, who all of a sudden began to cry, huge tears practically jumping out of the humongous green eyes.

  Addy, who was having another laughter attack, took Alex out of the high chair and tried to soothe her while still laughing. “It’s okay, baby, it’s okay.” When she turned around, she found Karen wiping the baby food off her face and exasperated. “I’m a mess, this is a total disaster! Why can’t I get anything right with this kid? I’m never going to get this mother thing right! I knew I was not going to be good at this!”

  “Aaawww! Come here baby, it’s okay. This kind
of thing always happens the first time. She doesn’t know how to eat. It’ll take some time until she catches on. And the same for us, we have to work at reading her better and we need to be patient.” Addy held Alex in one arm and Karen with the other. Although Addy had tried to wipe Alex’s face clean, the little one still had baby food smeared all over. She was now smiling relieved that she was in Addy’s arms. She looked adorable. “God, I’m so lucky!” Addy said out of the blue.

  Karen looked at her. “What? What are you talking about? How can you say that? Look at this kitchen! It’s a mess, there’s baby food everywhere, except in someone’s stomach, of course!”

  Addy continued to laugh. “How could I not be lucky? I have two gorgeous blondes in my arms?”

  Karen smiled and slapped her on the arm. Addy kissed her. “Go upstairs and shower, honeybunch. I’ll bathe this one and feed her a bottle. Then we can clean the kitchen.” After all the commotion, a nice warm bath, and a bottle, Alex finally went to sleep.

  ***

  It was also about this time that Alex began to drool a lot. “I think she might be teething. Let me see if I can take a look in her mouth.” Addy tried to open it, but the little one held it tight and wouldn’t allow it. She made all sorts of faces and fussed with her hands and even gave signs of being annoyed and of started to cry, so Addy gave up. “Okay, never mind. I won’t look. You are a stubborn little thing, aren’t you?” Alex was now smiling, as if she knew she had won that round. Addy looked at her seriously wondering if Alex actually understood. Alex was moving her arms and legs and seemed very happy on the floor mat. Addy laughed. “I think we are underestimating you.”

  “I’m going to check in the closet in the rec room. I think in the tons of presents we got, I saw teething rings. Going to that room is like going shopping at a toy store. We have just about every baby item available in there.” When Karen came back, she had teething rings in her hands, she washed them and placed one on a plate in the refrigerator to cool as the instructions indicated. The other one she brought with her to where Addy and Alex were sitting in the living room. Addy had set a small baby comforter on the area rug and was playing with Alex there.