Wolf

by D. M. Turner

  Colin turned at the open, sliding glass door and looked back.

  She dropped to the ground, feet tucked under her, prepared to run, and averted her gaze.

  A combination growl and soft bark made her sink down further still, and she buried her nose under the edge of the deck so he couldn’t bite it again.

  Nothing happened. She cautiously raised her head and found herself alone. A glance around confirmed Colin was nowhere in sight. Had he gone into the house? Would he return with reinforcements to make her go inside?

  She looked over her shoulder to the forest a hundred yards away.

  “Don’t even think about it.”

  Tanya flinched and whipped her head around, flattening to the ground as much as possible while still peering over the edge of the deck.

  Ian stood in the open doorway. “Don’t even consider bolting. Colin’ll chase you down again.” His half-smile wasn’t entirely benign. The look in his intense gaze was quite serious when he added, “Or I could send Brett after you instead.”

  She cringed.

  “You need to come inside and eat.”

  Fear locked her muscles in place, keeping her frozen to the ground. She couldn’t go back to being a helpless captive. Not again. Memory of concrete walls, a steel door, no windows, and no air flow rushed to the front of her mind. Never again.

  He crossed the deck and squatted just out of arm’s reach. “What are you afraid of?”

  The click of toenails on the deck boards drew their gazes. Colin carried a big slab of cooked roast in his mouth. When he reached the edge of the deck, he dropped it on her front feet.

  Ian chuckled. “I guess that’s one way to solve the problem.” He got to his feet and glanced down at his son. “If you sleep outside tonight, hunker down someplace warm. They’re saying it might rain. I’ll leave the swinging door into the garage unlocked, just in case.”

  Colin offered a soft, short bark and waved his tail slowly, then he hopped off the deck to stand beside Tanya.

  The older man returned to the house, closing the glass door behind him.

  The scent of beef made Tanya’s stomach grumble, and she made short work of Colin’s offering.

  He turned and trotted into the forest, leaving her to follow.

  She caught up with him, glad to move away from the house.

  The sun went down, leaving only the illumination of twilight.

  Colin led her back to the rock from which he’d tackled her earlier. With the briefest glance in her direction, he slipped into a crack at its base.

  She followed, surprised to find a crevice big enough for three or four adult wolves.

  Without ceremony, Colin lay against one of the side walls and stared at her.

  She curled up next to him and sighed. If she’d been human, she would’ve laughed at the absurdity of it all. Sleeping in a huge crack in a boulder in the middle of the forest, Lord only knew where, despite the fact there was a perfectly good, and comfortable, house nearby. If anyone had said she’d ever contemplate such a thing, much less do it, she’d have laughed in their faces. But in those days, things had been so different.

  Human. Young. Carefree except for stressing about homework, mid-terms, and finals. Home with parents she’d believed loved her unconditionally. A whimper escaped her throat.

  Colin nuzzled her then laid his head across her shoulders.

  She changed position to lay her head on his outstretched front paws, comforted by his proximity. Would he abandon her, too, at some point? He didn’t know her yet. Once he did, maybe he wouldn’t be any more faithful than her family. Then she’d be completely alone. No family. No pack. No one.

  She resisted the urge to whine again.

  * * *

  June 11, 2015

  One week later

  Tanya ducked behind a tree then peered around it with intense concentration.

  Colin watched without a sound. That rabbit was old and weak, probably having strayed through one of the culverts since the water in the stream was low. Perfect game for a wolf in training. Colin had spoken with his father off and on over the past few days about how he might help Tanya recover from her family’s abandonment. Dad had suggested lessons in wolf behavior, hunting, and anything else Colin could imagine to keep her busy.

  “Don’t let her hide and sulk,” he’d warned.

  During the daylight hours, when they moved about the forest, it had worked. Mostly. Night had been another matter entirely. She’d whimpered and whined in her sleep every night. He’d curled up close, and she’d quieted for a time, but it never lasted.

  No matter how well she’d done any given day, she’d only go as far as the deck for food. She wouldn’t step onto it, much less go inside the house. Colin couldn’t fathom what that was about. Since she’d remained in wolf form ever since they’d left her parents’ home, he hadn’t had an opportunity to ask her.

  That caused a whole other concern. The longer one of them remained a wolf, the more their humanity slipped away. Colin had heard such stories all of his life. He feared for her safety. If they couldn’t convince her to return to human form, she could become violent. The human subconscious would fight for survival, even if that meant war with the wolf’s instincts. Unfortunately, that tended to bleed into the world in the form of violent behavior. They’d have to kill her. He’d spoken to his father about that, too, which had done no good. They couldn’t break through the grief locking her in wolf form. She’d have to do it.

  To further complicate matters, the dark moon was only days away. It fed emotions such as grief and depression in wolves. She’d get worse instead of better. Members of the pack knew to guard their emotions during that time, but she didn’t know the effect it would probably have on her.

  Brett had been oddly silent about the whole thing. He’d come by the house daily, Dad had said earlier that afternoon. He’d asked about Tanya, received an update, and left.

  Oddly enough, most of the wolves in the pack had acted strangely the past few days. Dad hadn’t said why that might be, which Colin found curious. When pack behavior altered, Dad had always explained why or at least shared possibilities. This time, he remained pensive and kept his thoughts to himself.

  Movement distracted Colin from his thoughts. Tanya lunged from behind the tree and landed on the unsuspecting furball. She grabbed it as Colin had taught her. A quick, sharp shake of her head snapped its neck. She dropped it on the ground and glanced at Colin, pride in her eyes.

  Considering she’d been so squeamish about the idea of killing only a week ago, she’d come along quickly as a hunter. She’d proven to have a good nose, too, though she still didn’t use it as much as she should. He had no doubt she’d continue to improve with time.

  He walked over and nudged the rabbit closer, encouraging her to eat her kill. Doubt flashed through amber eyes, and she stepped back. His father would have his head if either of them killed without consuming what they ate. It was wasteful. He nosed it closer again. She took another step back.

  Fine. Colin ate it while she watched, making short work of the stringy old thing. He gave her a mildly disgusted look, turned, and walked away.

  * * *

  Tail low, head down, Tanya followed Colin back to the crevice in the rock. He was disappointed in her. That much was painfully apparent. Wasn’t it enough that she’d learned to hunt? A quick kill prevented prey from suffering. That rabbit hadn’t known what hit it, had no time to react. Good enough, right? She wasn’t ready to rend an animal into pieces. The very thought made her queasy. The hunt was fun though. Battling wits and stealth against her prey. It had only been rabbits and the occasional squirrel so far, but still.

  If she continued not to eat the kills, would Colin and his father send her away? She curled up in their hiding place and sighed. Tomorrow. Tomorrow I’ll eat the animal, even if it makes me hurl.

  A faint scuffling sound lifted her head. Colin, too, raised his head and peered at the opening.

  Another wolf app
eared, paused, and entered. Even bigger than Colin, he had a brown and red coat grizzled throughout with white. Red covered his ears, circled his eyes, and streaked the top of his nose. White lined black lips and continued underneath to mark his throat. Yellow eyes met Colin’s.

  Colin lowered his gaze.

  The wolf’s scent finally reached Tanya’s nose, and she tensed. Brett. She hadn’t seen him since the day they’d rescued her, but she remembered the smell of him. Even when he was still and quiet, he stank of buried rage.

  He stopped by her side, nuzzled the back of her head, and then curled up against the wall, sandwiching her between him and Colin.

  What was he doing there?

  Not long after his arrival, thunder rumbled over the mountain and the scent of rain filled the air.

  A crack of thunder made her jump.

  Colin and Brett shifted closer, wrapping her in their warm strength.

  Maybe the latter man wasn’t so big and scary after all.

  Thunder popped again, this time closer.

  Tanya buried her head under Colin’s throat and closed her eyes, willing her body to relax. It was only a storm. No matter how loud is seemed, it was no different than any other storm she’d endured in her life.

  * * *

  June 16, 2015

  Minutes before sunrise

  Colin stood on the rock that had served as their shelter for close to two weeks, his gaze on the sky. Soon after the sun rose, the new moon would come. The heaviness of it bore down on his very bones. Darkness despite sunlight. He hated the dark moon.

  Tanya’s hunting skills had gotten better every day. The night after that first storm, she’d eaten a squirrel without more than a moment’s hesitation. Her tracking abilities and lupine communication continued to improve.

  Still, she cried in her sleep. It had been worse the past couple of nights. Due, he believed, to the coming new moon. That had also made her increasingly despondent.

  Brett had returned only once. Rain had come again, and he’d appeared just as silently as before to help guard Tanya’s sleep.

  Colin had no idea what that was about, why the other man felt the need to be there. Had he designs on courting Tanya to be his mate? If so, there wasn’t much Colin could do about it. He couldn’t best Brett in a fight. Not a fair one anyway, and he wasn’t sure he could bring himself to cheat, even if it meant Tanya remained at his side permanently.

  The sun peaked over mountain peaks and ridges along the eastern horizon.

  He hopped to the ground to check on Tanya, who had yet to emerge. She’d curled into a tight ball, facing away from the opening. He padded over and nosed her.

  Tension rippled through her muscles, assuring him she was awake and aware of his presence, she didn’t budge.

  He nuzzled her again, pushing harder.

  She growled softly without lifting her head.

  Colin snorted, growled, and pawed her shoulder.

  Her head lifted to look sideways at him. Her lip curled in a snarl that revealed teeth as another growl rumbled out.

  A low, harsh growl behind them silenced them both, and they whipped their heads around to see who had come.

  Brett. In human form, not that that offered much reassurance. This could be bad. If he was temperamental on top of Tanya being snarly, there could be a fight, which could only end badly for her.

  Colin moved to stand between them.

  “Ian needs both of you at the house. Now.” He issued the order with a deep, grumbling tone that brooked no argument.

  Colin peered over his shoulder at Tanya, who slowly got to her feet. Head down, tail drooping, she walked past him. He followed.

  What could his father want? Especially at that early hour.

  They reached the clearing that circled the house just as the new moon peeked over the horizon.

  * * *

  Had the time come that Ian would make her leave? Or would he have her dragged into the house and imprisoned? Days had passed, but he hadn’t come for her. Tanya had begun to hope he never would. That he’d forget all about her, and leave her to live in peace in the woods. No such luck apparently.

  She padded quietly after Brett, too afraid to argue, balk, or run and risk angering him. He’d been a surprising comfort during the thunderstorms that had come through, but when he got the stern scowl on his face like at that moment, she feared him again.

  As they crossed the clearing, she eyed the house. She stopped at the edge of the deck, as she had every day since she’d arrived.

  Brett didn’t look back or hesitate before walking into the house through the open sliding door.

  Colin halted at her side, head cocked slightly, yellow gaze on the house.

  “Tanya?”

  She flinched then froze, her gaze shooting to the man who had stepped onto the deck from the living room. Chris? She blinked rapidly a few times.

  Still, he remained.

  Not a figment of her imagination or an illusion created by a grieving heart. What was her brother doing there? How had he found her?

  “Tanya? Is that really you?” His footsteps halted a few feet away. His brows drew together.

  One foot crept onto the deck, followed by another, then another, until all four of her paws rested on the boards. She crossed to Chris and shoved her nose into his fingers with an upward sweep of her head.

  He dropped to one knee and wrapped fingers in her scruff. “Mom and Dad told me, but I couldn’t believe it. I had to see for myself.”

  She lowered her head, letting her gaze fall to the deck and her ears droop.

  “I would’ve come sooner if I’d known how to find you.” He lifted her head with a hand under her chin and leaned his forehead against hers. “I found a business card with Ian Campbell’s phone number last night while visiting Mom and Dad. I hope you don’t mind, but I called this morning and pleaded with him to let me see you.”

  Tanya nuzzled his chest and throat to reassure him.

  Chris looked beyond her. “You must be Colin. Your father told me how you’ve watched over my sister, that you rescued her from the horrible place where she’d been held. I’ll never be able to thank you enough.”

  The big brown wolf dipped his chin once without breaking eye contact. An acknowledgement of Chris’ words, Tanya assumed.

  “Chris, Colin, Tanya, come inside.” Ian stood in the open doorway. “Colin, Tanya, get dressed, then all of you can sit and visit while I make breakfast. I’m sure we could all stand something to eat.”

  Tanya slipped away from her brother’s grasp, glanced toward the forest, and then padded into the house and straight to the guestroom. She needed a shower.

  Once in the guestroom, she shoved the door with her nose until it clicked then called forth the Shift. It hurt more than last time, as though her body resisted the return to human form. Was that normal?

  She got to her feet after the last of the changes swept over her, stretching to ease lingering aches and pains. Then she searched for the duffle bag Colin had packed full of clothes. It sat on the top shelf of the closet. Empty. Jeans hung in the nearly-empty closet. She grabbed a pair then returned to the bedroom to check the dresser for the rest of her things. Sure enough, all there and neatly put away. Who had done it? She needed to thank them. They could’ve simply left the bag on the bed, and she’d have taken care of it. Eventually. Probably.

  The shower was hot, clean, and welcome. Mostly. Part of her mourned the loss of the scents of the forest she’d carried. She shampooed her hair thoroughly then conditioned it. By the time she shut off the water, her skin tingled. Had it really been several days since her last shower? With the wolf, time passed in a blur, more than it ever had as a human. How many nights had she slept in the crevice of that rock?

  Tanya dried off, brushed and braided her hair, and dressed in blue jeans and a hunter green t-shirt. Appropriate. If she couldn’t be in the forest, she could bring the color of the forest to her.

  Her gaze landed on a framed photogr
aph she’d somehow overlooked before on top of the dresser. The one of her and Chris and their sisters, Marcy and Alexis. Chris was the oldest of the four but liked to tease Marcy and Alexis about looking older than him. Not a joke that endeared him to them, any more than his habit of knuckling Tanya on top of her head did.

  Chris was at the Preserve. He’d really come.

  Now what? How much did he truly know? He’d seen her as a wolf, but did he comprehend what that meant?

  Darkness cloaked her mind and heart, making her want to crawl under the bed and stay there. She’d never be able to go back to her old life. Her parents had disowned her. Her degree would never be completed. She was trapped. And alone. What would stop Ian from sending her away at some point? Even if wolves deemed females to be valuable, would he want one whose parents didn’t even want her?

  * * *

  The guestroom door was closed, so Colin tapped lightly on it.

  A soft, small voice said, “Come in.”

  He pushed the door open enough to stick his head into the room.

  Tanya sat on the edge of the bed, shoulders slumped and head down. She glanced up, tears coursing her cheeks.

  The dark moon was having a worse effect than he’d feared. Maybe they should’ve waited until the new moon had passed to ask her to return to human form.

  He stepped into the room, closed the door behind him, and sat beside her on the bed. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

  She shook her head and dropped her gaze to the floor, wiping a hand across both cheeks.

  “Talk to me.” He kept his tone soft, so she wouldn’t think he was ordering her around and get ruffled.

  A long, shaky sigh went through her. “I want to go back.”

  “To your parents’?” He cocked his head, trying to understand.

  “The forest. It’s safer there.”

  “Safe from what?”

  “The wolf feels at home there, and I have nowhere else to go.”

  He frowned. That in no way answered his question. “Do you feel unsafe here, in the house?”

  She nodded without looking up.

  “Why?”

  A long, heavy silence fell.

  One… two… three…. Colin counted the pulse at her throat while he waited for her to say something. Anything. Four… five… six… seven… eight… nine… ten… eleven….