Wolf

by D. M. Turner

  “You’ll feel better once you’ve eaten,” he murmured and reached out to gently stroke her ear, seeking sensitive pressure points.

  In minutes, she heaved a sigh, her body relaxed, the panting eased, and her breathing returned to normal.

  “Acupressure’s helping, I see.”

  Colin glanced up at his dad, who squatted on the other side of Tanya and peered under the edge of one of the bandages.

  She whimpered softly.

  “I know it hurts, darling.” He caressed her muzzle.

  To Colin’s amusement, despite her seriously weakened state, she still grumbled at his father’s use of the endearment.

  Dad raised a brow. “What’s that all about?”

  “I’m not sure, but she growled at me the morning I found her when I used the same word. She doesn’t appear to like it.”

  “That’s certainly new.” His father got to his feet. “I’m warming up broth. That’s the easiest thing to get into her until she gains strength.”

  Colin nodded. Liver-and-bone broth was one of the most basic foods there was for helping the injured. Nutrient-dense, easy to assimilate. Tanya would feel better in no time.

  Then they had to talk.

  Why couldn’t the pack have behaved for at least a couple more months? Given Tanya time to accept what she’d become and recover from what had been done to her? The only time she embraced the wolf was when in its form. As a human, she still hated what she was. The fact she continued to refer to herself as a “monster” proved that.

  It had been less than a month since she’d been savaged and Turned into a werewolf. Imprisoned. Raped. Nearly killed. The only survivor of six kidnapped women. To add insult to serious injury, her parents had thrown her out when they found out what she was. She needed time to get her feet under her, figure out what to do with her life. Without pressure from him or anyone else. Enough decisions had been ripped from her hands.

  However, it looked like they’d run out of time.

  “Help me get her upright enough to drink this.” Dad knelt on the other side of Tanya. He set a big bowl of broth on the floor near her head and reached for her.

  Colin sat up and helped sit Tanya into a Sphinx-like position.

  She whimpered and panted with the stress of pain.

  “I know,” he murmured, sliding closer on his knees so she could lean her good shoulder against him. “Drink, and you’ll heal in nothing flat. Remember the wounds you had when I first brought you here, how fast they healed when you ate?” She’d been with them almost a full month. Her ribs still showed.

  After a few seconds, she slowly lapped up the broth, pausing from time to time as though she might lose consciousness.

  He and Dad both kept steadying hands on her.

  “I never intended to displace Graham.” Colin wanted to bite his tongue. He hadn’t meant to bring that up right then. It could have waited until he and his father were alone.

  “I know. You could’ve done it a few years ago, if you’d been so inclined. I’ve often wondered why you didn’t.”

  “Third in the pack. If something happens to you and Brett, I’m alpha. I really don’t want the responsibility. Having people look to me to know all the answers.” He shook his head. “I don’t have anywhere near the experience the rest of you have.”

  “I see.” Dad lifted a brow and studied him. “So, why’d you do it now?”

  “When I saw him hurting Tanya….” He shook his head. “Everything in me demanded I stop him. She’s been hurt enough.” He flinched at the sharpness of his tone and winced at his dad. “Sorry. It’s not your fault. I shouldn’t snap at you like that.”

  “If I’d seen someone treat your mother like that, even before we were mated, I’d have killed him outright without hesitation or pause. You let Graham live. That’s good. It’s a sign of self-control. You didn’t get carried away.”

  “If he hadn’t submitted, I’d’ve killed him.” Certainty plowed through him. He’d always liked Graham, but when he’d seen Tanya crying in the grip of the other wolf’s teeth, blood turning her beautiful white fur red in the moonlight, he’d wanted only to see him dead. “Do you think he’ll stay?”

  “I suspect so. Graham is a forgiving sort.” Dad half-grinned, baring the double canine on the right side of his mouth. “Brett, not so much.”

  Colin chuckled. “I have no trouble believing that.” He sighed. “I’m really glad it wasn’t Brett who attacked her. I don’t think I could’ve taken him.”

  “He’s a tough customer, that’s for sure.” His father laughed. “Not exactly what most people would expect to hear about a mundane college history professor, eh?”

  “Yeah, well, I’ll bet none of the ones they know are werewolves.”

  “I’d say that’s a safe bet.”

  Tanya finished the broth, heaved a sigh, and leaned heavily against Colin. They helped her lie flat on the floor. No whimpering this time. That was good.

  Colin gently rubbed her ears and caught his father’s eye. “I’ve never forced a Shift against the full moon. That sucked. Big time.”

  “Not a pleasant experience, that’s for sure. If she hadn’t been so seriously injured, I certainly wouldn’t have done it.” Dad climbed to his feet, stretched his shoulders, and rotated his neck. “I’m still achy.”

  Now that his father had pointed it out, Colin realized he still hurt, too. He’d been so focused on Tanya, he’d ignored the pains still rippling through bones, joints, and muscles. He glanced at the clock on the wall in the kitchen. The moon wouldn’t set for more than a couple of hours yet. The sky had begun to lighten. Sunrise would come first.

  He flexed his back and shoulders, but it didn’t help. Resigned to it, he grabbed a throw pillow off the nearest chair, stretched out beside Tanya on the floor, and shoved the pillow under his head. A brief nap might ease the unhappiness in his body and help time pass more quickly. He closed his eyes.

  * * *

  The ache of fading wounds receded to the back of her mind. Tanya listened to Colin’s slow, steady respirations and knew he’d fallen asleep.

  “Talk to her,” his father had demanded. Something was wrong with the pack, and it was her fault. They’d tell her to leave.

  She’d known that would come eventually, but she hadn’t expected it so soon. A shard of pain sliced through her heart. She’d been with them less than a month, and they didn’t want her anymore. Her own parents had sent her away, so why wouldn’t the pack?

  Her shoulder still tender, Tanya slowly got to her feet and padded on all fours to the guestroom. Until Carlos, Peter, and Graham had come after her, she’d avoided even the slightest confrontation with the members of the pack. Yeah, she’d argued with Ian that first day, and she and Colin had butted heads a couple of times since then, but that was different.

  When she’d met Carlos and Peter upon their arrival, she hadn’t looked either of them in the eye or said more than a quiet “Hello”. Had she offended them somehow? And Graham… what had happened there? He’d seemed so kind before.

  No answers came. Only worsening confusion.

  In the guestroom, Tanya nosed the door closed and ripped the bandages off with her teeth, wincing when she caught and yanked fur around the still-healing wound. Light danced across the windows. The sun had risen, and the moon’s pull had faded. After hearing Colin and Ian talk about the pain of Shifting against the will of the moon, she’d opted not to tempt it earlier. At the moment, she wanted to get the itchy stiffness of blood washed away.

  The Shift wasn’t as hard or painful as she’d feared it might be, and she soon stepped into the shower to scrub away dirt and blood left clinging to bare skin. When the water ran clear, and the only thing marring pale skin were angry red welts where gaping wounds had been, she shut off the shower, dried off, and got dressed.

  Then she sat quietly on the bed, waiting for the axe to fall.

  A knock at the door soon jarred through her soul. “Yeah?”

  The doo
r opened, and Colin poked his head into the room. “May I come in?”

  Tanya nodded. Like he needed permission. It was his home, not hers.

  He closed the door then grabbed the chair at the desk and pulled it closer to the bed.

  “When do I have to go?”

  He paused in lowering himself into the chair. “Go?”

  “You’ve come to tell me to leave, right?” Tears filled her eyes. “I didn’t mean to cause trouble in the pack. I swear.”

  “What?” His brows shot up. “No. What happened… it wasn’t your fault. It was mine, And I have no intention of asking you to leave.”

  Tanya studied the steadfast confidence in his eyes then heaved a sigh of relief. “I thought that’s what Ian wanted you to talk to me about.”

  “No.” He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “He wanted to talk to you right after the dark moon, but I told him I’d take care of it. I thought it would buy you some time to get your feet under you where all these changes are concerned.”

  “Have I done something wrong?”

  “No. I underestimated the effect you’d have on the pack.” He shook his head. “I’ve known most of these men all of my life. I’ve never seen such behavior. We’ve had fights before, but nothing like this.”

  “Did I cause it?”

  His hesitation offered no reassurance. “It’s not that simple.”

  She growled softly. “Of course, it is. Did I, or did I not, cause what happened tonight?”

  “No, but you were the trigger.”

  Not helpful. “I don’t understand. Please, just tell me what happened and why.”

  “Having an unmated female around stirs up the unmated males. Tempers run hot, and fights break out.”

  He said he wasn’t asking her to leave. If that was true, and what he said about an unmated female…. Her breath caught. “Are you saying I have to be mated?”

  “Yes. To keep peace within the pack, you need to choose a mate.”

  A mate. A husband. Someone to share her bed. A man who would touch her…. A chill went through her, and fear reared up. “I don’t think I can.”

  “Hey.” He scooted the chair closer and, elbows on his knees, grasped the hands she’d knotted together in her lap. “I know you’re not ready. Not yet. That’s why I hoped to put it off. I didn’t expect it to get this bad so soon. You must choose a mate. It’s the only way Dad can restore peace.”

  Graham had attacked her. Carlos and Peter had taken turns driving her and fought over her like a piece of meat during a famine. If any of them touched her…. Lightheadedness made the world spin. Her stomach heaved.

  “With the exception of Graham, who is here off and on throughout the month to deal with pack finances, the others will leave today and most won’t return until the next full moon, which is on the thirty-first. You have time to decide, but you must make a choice by then.”

  Tanya shook her head. “I’m not ready for marriage… for….”

  Colin’s eyes widened, then he growled under his breath.

  She stopped breathing. Had she made him mad?

  “I’m an idiot.”

  She startled, blinking at him. “What?”

  “I’m an idiot.” He half-grinned. “I’m sorry. I should’ve been clearer about something. When I said you have to choose a mate, that didn’t mean you have to be married right away. You simply have to choose who you will marry. When that happens is between the two of you.”

  “Like getting engaged?”

  “Exactly. Once you’ve made your choice of intended mate, that will be announced to the whole pack. Even if you’re not married yet, they’ll consider you a mated female. Bound to someone and, thus, no longer available.”

  “That will put an end to the fighting?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why did they fight like that? Carlos and Peter were snapping at me and then biting at each other. Then Graham…. I didn’t know what he was doing, and he scared me. I tried to get away, and he attacked me. I don’t understand. If they wanted me for their mate, why were they so mean?”

  “Carlos and Peter were trying to herd you, coerce you into choosing one of them. They had no way of knowing that tactic would backfire. It might have worked on some females, but I don’t see it working with you because of how you were Turned. Their aggression frightened you, right?”

  She nodded, unashamed to admit how terrified she’d been because of their bizarre behavior.

  “Graham tried a different approach. He touched you, didn’t he?”

  “Yes. How did you know?”

  “Because I’ve noticed my father and I are the only ones you truly tolerate touch from. Even Brett last month, when he was gentle with you during those storms, you trembled in fear. You didn’t want him to touch you.”

  Tanya shook her head.

  “And, yet,” he held up their joined hands, “you don’t seem to mind my touch. You tolerated my father’s earlier, too.”

  “I know, somewhere deep inside, that you won’t hurt me.” She sniffled. “I also know I should be afraid of your father, him being alpha and all, but I’m not. Brett terrifies me, but not your father.”

  Colin chuckled. “I think most people have that exact same response to both of them, so you’re not alone.”

  She lowered her gaze to the floor and considered all he’d told her. “If I choose, will the others be offended?”

  “Only if you choose a human. That would most certainly offend them.” Amusement laced his voice.

  “They don’t need to worry about that.” She shook her head. “I don’t have a boyfriend.” Of the pack, Colin was the only one she could imagine binding herself to in marriage. What if he didn’t want her though? “What if the wolf I choose doesn’t want me in return?”

  “Then he’s a fool who needs to be put down before he makes any other woefully stupid decisions.”

  Tanya lifted her gaze to find humor dancing in his blue eyes. She laughed softly then sobered. “We really wouldn’t have to be married right away?”

  “Absolutely not. The two of you can get married next week, next month, next year.” He shrugged. “Whenever suits you. On the upside, that would give you and him time to get to know one another, and for you to be comfortable with your decision.”

  “When does your father expect an answer?”

  “Between now and the next full moon. That gives you almost thirty days.” He released her hands and leaned back in his chair. “By the way, have you decided whether or not to continue with school?”

  “Everyone seems to think I should finish my degree.” She frowned and folded her arms across her stomach. “I’m just not sure… what if I wolf-out in front of somebody because I get upset or something.”

  Colin laughed. “Wolf-out? I like that. I’ll have to remember that one. It’s more interesting than Shift.” He shook his head. “You’ve completed what? Three years so far?”

  Tanya nodded.

  “In all that time, has anyone scared you badly or really ticked you off?”

  “No, but I get pretty stressed when I have papers due or finals week rolls around. That’s fear, right? What if I lose control and, like, eat a professor or something?”

  “You realize you could ‘What if…’ yourself into never stepping foot outside of this room again, right?”

  Okay, so maybe she was being overly dramatic and fretting too much. She smiled softly. “Would that be so bad?”

  “I don’t want to see you emotionally crippled like that.” His smile warmed a few notches. “You deserve better.”

  The sincerity in his expression brought tears to her eyes. “Would you….” She shook her head. What are you thinking? Like he’d actually say yes.

  “Would I what?” He cocked his head in a move so reminiscent of his wolf that it brought a smile to her face.

  Just ask him. The worst he can do is say no.

  Less than reassuring. Would she ever be able to look him in the eyes again if he found her reque
st ridiculous?

  Tanya took a deep breath. “Would you… be my mate?” The final words came out little more than a whisper. She hadn’t meant for them to sound so weak, but it was too late to call them back and try again.

  His smile brightened. “I’d be honored.”

  She blinked at him. “Really?”

  “Do you truly find that so surprising?” He chuckled. “I wouldn’t have deposed Graham defending just anybody, you know.”

  “I’m sorry you had to do that. I know you didn’t want to. I heard what you told your father.”

  “Ah.” He rolled his eyes and shrugged. “It’ll be fine. You’re worth it.”

  She lowered her gaze to the floor. “I hope so.”

  Colin shifted from the chair to the bed and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, drawing her against his side in a tight hug. “I know so.” He kissed her temple. “Now, how about we get some real food into you, so you can finish healing. Until you get your weight up, you need to make sure you eat regularly, even if your appetite says no.”

  Tanya nodded. For him, she’d do anything, but it was probably too early in the relationship to tell him that.

  * * *

  “Did you talk to her?” Dad looked up from his desk, a questioning brow raised.

  “I did. Then I fed her and put her to bed.” Colin smiled and dropped into the chair at the end of the desk. How many times over the years had he sat right there, chatting with his father? Countless. He smiled at the memory. “I think I’ve just about talked her into returning to school.”

  “Good.” His father nodded and closed the book he’d been reading. “Even if she doesn’t use the degree in the long run, she’ll learn self-control in a relatively safe environment.”

  “She’s afraid a professor will tick her off and she’ll eat him.” He grinned.

  Dad chuckled. “Not impossible, but unlikely.” He sobered. “And the other topic? How did that go?”

  “I kinda freaked her out. I wasn’t clear at first that the initial decision didn’t mean an immediate marriage.” He scoffed. “It didn’t even occur to me that she wouldn’t automatically understand what I was saying.”

  “You got it cleared up, I hope.”