Ties That Bind

by Sarah Schulman

  “To sin by silence when they should protest makes cowards of men.”

  Yes that’s true, but it does more than corrupt those who themselves reward perpetrators with silence. It keeps the abuse going and it abandons the victims. Silence is the greatest reward a perpetrator can receive, whether the perpetrator is a family, a government, a publishing company, or an individual. Saying nothing while your friend’s family or lover or society or cultural institution shuns and scapegoats her is to participate in the process. Yes, it would be better for you, spiritually, to tell the truth to the perpetrator. But, more importantly, her chance for a decent life depends on it.