Rock Me

by Raven K. Asher

  It was painfully clear that this relationship wouldn’t last with Shiloh.

  He was too pushy, and I had a feeling that he would end up cheating on me at some point. He hadn’t exactly hidden the fact that he had been with a bunch of girls, and I doubted that if the situation presented itself while I wasn’t around, he would take it.

  For now, I would give him the benefit of the doubt, but I wouldn’t be giving him multiple chances.

  Shiloh would only get one.

  All too soon, Shiloh stops and then rolls onto his back.

  “That was amazing.” He breathes out while closing his eyes.

  It may have been for him, but I hadn’t even been close to getting the satisfaction that he had.

  Sighing softly, I stare up at the ceiling of the bus while Shiloh’s breathing evens out as he falls into a deep sleep.

  After a few moments, I close my eyes and drift off.

  ****

  “Hey, Chloe, Shiloh, you two might want to wake up and say goodbye. We’ve got to leave in ten.” Dante calls out from the other side of the door.

  I sit up with a gasp before looking over at Shiloh as he groans.

  Scrubbing my hand over my face, I turn to shake Shiloh. “Hey, I have to go.”

  He responds with a wave of his hand and a low groan.

  “Shiloh…I have to go.” I announce again.

  This time he opens his eyes while releasing another groan. “Just go, I’ll see you soon.”

  His words were like a slap. He didn’t seem to care at all that we were going to be apart for over a week. Hell, he didn’t seem to care that we had just slept together either.

  Instead of saying a word, I stand up and grab my clothing. I slip each piece on while Shiloh rolls over to fall back to sleep.

  Once I’m ready to go, I move towards the door before pausing to glance back at Shiloh.

  “Goodbye…” I whisper.

  With that, I exit the room and close the door behind me.

  Dante, Max, and Lucas watch from the front of the bus as I walk towards them.

  My vision blurs as I fight to hold back my emotions.

  No one says a word as I exit the bus and then begin to walk away from it.

  “Chloe…wait…” Lucas suddenly calls out.

  I stop and then turn as he rushes towards me. He stops in front of me before pulling me into an embrace.

  “Shiloh can be a real ass sometimes; don’t take it personally, okay.” He states while leaning back slightly.

  I nod while biting my lip to keep myself from crying.

  After a moment, Lucas sighs. “You honestly deserve better. Shiloh isn’t the guy for you.”

  “I’m beginning to see that,” I whisper.

  “Good; don’t torture yourself too long. He’ll only end up hurting you worse in the end.” Lucas replies gently.

  “Why are you saying all of this, Lucas? Isn’t this breaking some kind of bro code or whatever?” I question curiously.

  “I’m saying it because I can tell how great of a girl you are, and you don’t deserve to be treated like trash. To hell with the bro code, I’d rather not see a nice girl like you ruined because of a selfish brat like Shiloh.” Lucas answers.

  “Thank you, Lucas,” I reply gratefully.

  He nods. “You’re welcome, Chloe.”

  With that, Lucas turns and walks back to the bus while Mitch joins me.

  “Is everything alright, Miss Chloe?” Mitch questions.

  I turn to look at him while shaking my head. “No, can you take me to our bus?”

  He nods and then waves his hand for me to follow him. We walk through the parking lot until we’re on the other side of the building.

  As we reach the bus, the guys appear.

  I move quickly onto the bus before they could see me. There was no doubt that they would instantly know that something was wrong, and I didn’t want to explain what had happened.

  On the bus, I run straight into Mickie.

  He keeps me from falling as he searches my eyes. “What’s going on, Chloe?”

  “I don’t feel good.” I lie.

  “Alright, go lay down in the back. I’ll let you know when we reach the hotel.” Mickie replies, even though he didn’t look convinced by my excuse.

  “Thank you, Mickie,” I whisper.

  He nods and then pushes me to go while the guys begin entering the bus.

  Once I’m in the back, I close the door and then lay down on the bed. All at once, my emotions spill out. I press my face against a pillow to muffle my sobs while grasping the blankets tightly in my hands.

  Chapter 19

  “Chloe, are you alright in there?” Marshal calls out from the other side of the door.

  I had locked the door shared between our rooms to keep anyone from being able to come in. I honestly didn’t want to see or talk to anyone.

  The only person that had seen me briefly was Mitch. He would knock on the door, and I would open it just enough to look out at him and so that he could slip a bag of food through the doorway.

  He hadn’t said a single word to me, though.

  For two days, I had kept everyone else at a distance. I hadn’t even spoken to Shiloh when he had called me. But he was also the last person that I wanted to say a single word to. I had no idea what to even say to him honestly.

  More than likely, I would only end up screaming at him.

  I was so frustrated and hurt.

  It didn’t help that a few pictures of Shiloh with other girls had suddenly surfaced. They were plastered all over the internet along with stories wondering if Shiloh was cheating on me or if our relationship was over.

  Shiloh had left message after message promising me that they were old, but at this point, I didn’t know what to believe or think. All I could focus on was what Lucas had said to me.

  Eventually, I would have to end the relationship.

  I didn’t want to constantly question whether or not Shiloh would be sleeping with someone else when we were apart.

  Lucas had been right; I did deserve better.

  But right now, I was drowning in my own depression. Everything that I had been through lately had just come to a head, and I couldn’t escape how I felt.

  “Chloe, please answer me.” Marshal pleads.

  When I remain quiet, Marshal begins talking to someone else.

  “Are you sure that she’s still alive in there?” Russell asks softly.

  “I’m sure. She’s been having food delivered.” Marshal replies before sighing. “Plus, I’ve heard her crying a few times.”

  “What the hell? Why didn’t you say something?” Russell growls out.

  A few moments later, Russell knocks on the door. “Sweetheart, open the door. Tell me what’s going on. Did that asshole do something to you?”

  Instead of answering him, I bury my face against my pillow to keep myself from crying again.

  “Chloe…” Russell breathes out. “Please, at least say something so that we know you’re alright. You’re starting to really worry us.”

  All at once, my crying stops, and I stand up.

  I run to the door and then open it. Before I can stop myself, a loud crack echoes through the rooms as my hand connects with Russell’s face.

  His eyes widen with shock while I step back, horrified by my actions.

  After the shock wears off, Russell steps forward. “Hit me again…”

  “What…no…” I whimper.

  “Do it. You obviously have some anger that needs let out, so do it.” Russell replies. “Hit me again. Hit me as many times as you need to.”

  Tears begin streaming down my cheeks as I shake my head. “I can’t…”

  “Then tell me what to do to make this better.” He replies.

  “I need to see my parents.” I blurt, surprising myself.

  It shouldn’t have been a shock, though. I had wanted to talk to my mother about everything happening. I needed to speak to her; to hear her voice.

&
nbsp; “Then that’s what we’ll do.” Marshal states suddenly. “I’ll take you to your parent’s house.”

  With that, he marches into my room before he grabs my suitcase. He then begins to sort through my clothing before pulling out a simple pair of jeans and a black v-neck t-shirt.

  “Are we going now?” I laugh while wiping my tears away with my hands.

  Marshal nods. “Yes, there’s no better time, and if you don’t go right now, you’ll talk yourself out of it.”

  He was right; I would talk myself out of going if I waited.

  After a moment, Marshal holds out the clothes to me. “Grab a shower, get dressed, and I’ll be waiting for you in the room next door.”

  I nod and take the clothes.

  Without another word, Marshal walks into the other room, leaving me alone with Russell.

  Sighing softly, I bow my head before looking up at Russell.

  “I’m sorry that I hit you.” I apologize. “I don’t know what came over me.”

  “What did Shiloh do?” Russell questions.

  I close my eyes and bow my head. “He didn’t even say goodbye. We slept together, and he practically kicked me off the bus like I meant nothing.”

  “That son of a…” Russell growls out. “I’m going to kill him the next time that I see him.”

  Placing my hand on his arm, I sigh. “I don’t want you doing anything. I’m going to end our relationship. We’re still going to have to face Shiloh, and I’d rather there not be any issues between you and him, okay.”

  “Are you sure, because I could put him down with one hit…” Russell tries.

  “Let me handle this,” I reply.

  He nods and then sighs. “I hate to bring this up, but have you seen the pictures on the internet?”

  “Yes, I’ve seen them.” I breathe out.

  “Have you talked to him about them?” He then asks.

  “I’ve been ignoring his calls,” I answer.

  “Good.” Russell huffs out.

  “Russell, let the girl get her shower.” Marshal suddenly commands.

  A moment of silence passes before Russell places his hand under my chin. “Do you want me to come with you and Marshal?”

  I shake my head. “No, we’ve got this. Marshal understands my parents more than anyone.”

  Russell nods. “Will you at least have dinner with me at my parent’s house?”

  “Of course…” I reply with a smile.

  “If you need anything, just call me, okay; I’ll come running.” Russell then states while gazing deep into my eyes.

  “Thanks, Russ,” I whisper.

  Smiling, Russell leans forward to press his lips against my forehead. A moment later, he takes a step back before leaving the room.

  I sigh and then sit down on the edge of my bed before grabbing my phone.

  I scroll through text message after text message from Shiloh before holding my finger over his number to call.

  Before I could lose my nerve, I press call.

  It rings twice before Shiloh answers. “Chloe…?”

  “It’s me,” I whisper.

  “What’s been going on? Why haven’t you answered my calls or texts?” He fires off before sighing roughly. “I’m sorry about what happened the night we left. I was so out of it with those painkillers that Andy gave me that I didn’t realize what I was doing or saying.”

  I close my eyes. “I don’t think this is going to work out, Shiloh.”

  “Is it because of those pictures, because those are old? You can ask Dante, Max, and Lucas; I’ve been staying away from everyone. I’ve been more worried about you.” He replies.

  “Shiloh, it’s not just that; I just don’t think I can handle being in a relationship right now.” I lie.

  I was trying to make this as easy as possible, but he wasn’t.

  “Please, don’t do this, Chloe…” He breathes out.

  Silence fills my ear as I bite my lip to keep myself from crying. This was the first time I had ever broken up with someone like this. Breaking up with Russell had been easy, but then again, we had mutually come to the same conclusion when we decided to end our short relationship.

  After a few more moments, he sighs. “If you’re going to break up with me, then wait until we see each other again so you can say it to my face.”

  “I’m not going to change my mind,” I stress.

  “We’ll see,” Shiloh replies.

  Before I can say another word, he hangs up on me.

  God, he was such a jerk, and spoiled brat just like Lucas had said. He thought the world revolved around him. I only wished that I would have seen all of that before I had slept with him.

  Holding my phone in my hand, I close my eyes and squeeze it.

  A burst of anger fills me, and before I can stop myself, I stand up and throw my phone against the wall as hard as I can. It hits hard and then shatters before falling to the floor in pieces.

  Marshal and Russell rush into the room.

  “What the hell, Chloe?” Marshal questions while glancing between me and the remains of my phone.

  Instead of saying a word to him or Russell, I grab my clothes again and move into the bathroom. I shut the door behind me and then lean my back against it.

  “What is happening to her?” Marshal whispers.

  “I honestly don’t know, but it all has to do with that asshole,” Russell replies.

  “I knew he was going to be trouble from the start,” Marshal growls out. “I should have done or said something to keep her away from him.”

  “No kidding…I would have done whatever I could to keep her from being hurt.” Russell breathes out. “I’d do anything to make her happy.”

  “Even though I hate seeing you together, you’re the only other person that I trust with her,” Marshal states softly.

  Before they can say anything else, I toss my clothes onto the sink before opening the door again. I walk out and then grab Russell’s hand before pulling him back to the bathroom with me.

  Once I close the door behind us, I turn to face him.

  “Please make this pain go away.” I plead.

  He sighs while placing his hands on either side of my face. “Nothing I do will take the pain away, Sweetheart. In the end, you’ll only end up feeling worse.”

  “Russell, please…” I beg while closing my eyes.

  I grasp his shirt tightly in my hands as I lay my head against his chest.

  Russell wraps his arms around me as he releases a long-winded sigh. “Not like this, Sweetheart.”

  A sob gets caught in my throat as I push him away. “Then leave.”

  He nods once and then moves past me to exit the bathroom.

  I know he was rejecting me for my own good, but it wasn’t making me feel any better. After what Shiloh had done, I felt as if no one wanted me.

  With more tears building in my eyes, I strip down and then move into the shower.

  Cold water washes over my body before it finally warms.

  I barely notice how hot the water ends up getting as I stand numbly in place. I just wanted to disappear.

  The pain was just too much to bear.

  Chapter 20

  “Chloe, are you ready to go?” Marshal asks as he walks into the room.

  I had been out of the shower for a while, but I had been pacing back and forth in the room. My mind had been working overtime on what I was going to say to my parents and Shiloh when I saw them.

  While standing under the water, I had cursed my weakness.

  I was tired of crying, and I was tired of feeling worthless.

  Everything that I had been feeling was because I had let a few words and actions pull me down. I was determined not to let it happen anymore.

  Shiloh and my parents had one last chance.

  If they failed, then I would cut them entirely from my life. I was done holding on to relationships that were no good for me.

  Stopping in the middle of the room, I turn to face Marshal befor
e sighing. “I don’t know.”

  “You’re not changing your mind, are you?” He asks.

  “I don’t know,” I repeat.

  “Well, before you do, we better go.” Marshal pushes.

  Before I lost my nerve, I move towards the door and then walk outside with Marshal following close behind. As we walk through the parking lot, Mitch joins us.

  Marshal stops and then turns to face Mitch. “You can stay behind. I’ll watch over Chloe.”

  “I’m sorry, but Mickie would kill me if she got hurt on my watch again,” Mitch replies. “And I wouldn’t forgive myself if something terrible happened.”

  “He can come.” I insist. “I feel better when he’s close anyway.”

  “I can take a separate car if you’d like some privacy.” Mitch states.

  “That would be best,” Marshal replies.

  Mitch nods and then follows us again as Marshal and I begin walking towards one of the mustangs.

  Once we reach the black one, Mitch moves towards a sleek gray car.

  He hesitates to get in until Marshal and I are inside our car.

  Marshal starts the engine and then pulls out of the parking lot. Moments later, Mitch falls into line behind us on the road.

  Just a few minutes later, we park in front of the house where I had grown up.

  I stare at it as Marshal shuts the car’s engine off.

  “Chloe…?” Marshal whispers.

  “I just need a minute,” I reply softly.

  He grunts in response.

  Silence fills the car as I continue to stare at my childhood home and the large oak tree in the front that I had played under. That same tree was the one that I had used to climb out of my window so that I could sneak out to band practice.

  Suddenly the curtains in the living room window move.

  I spot my mother gazing back at us.

  Without thought, I open the door and then climb out of the car. I then move towards the front door without taking my eyes off my mother.

  As soon as I reach the front door, it opens.

  My mother stands quietly as her eyes glisten.

  Any words that I could have said get lost as I watch her.