by Karin Baine
‘It’s not as though you’ve moved back into a terraced house where you’re all living on top of each other. You live in a palace. Don’t expect me to feel sorry for you.’
She mirrored his good-natured grin. Ed wasn’t afraid to call her out on things like that. He didn’t pander to her and made sure she stayed grounded, not caring she was royalty. However, that insolent comment deserved a suitable reaction.
She lobbed a chip at him, which he managed to catch in his mouth.
‘Show-off.’
‘Are you going to tell me what caused the rift between you and your parents? It’s none of my business but they do seem to genuinely care about you.’
Georgiana couldn’t argue with that, despite their differences in the past. They’d gone out of their way to adapt the home for her coming back. Even if she had seen it at the time as resignation that she was changed for ever. At least she’d had somewhere to retreat to when coming to terms with everything. Their actions were only beginning to sink in now her emotions weren’t so fraught.
What Ed was asking her to do was spill the family secrets. Something her parents had gone to great lengths to cover up. However, telling him what had happened was more about honouring Freddie than betraying anyone. Her appetite abandoned her as she thought about it all.
‘I expect you heard about Freddie’s death a few years ago.’
‘Your brother? I remember reading about it. I’m sorry. He was very young to have died so suddenly. It was his heart, wasn’t it?’ There was the gut punch. The story that had been fed to the nation and the one she was about to blow wide open.
‘In a roundabout way...’ It was heart failure listed as the cause on his death certificate but it failed to detail the circumstances of her dear brother’s last tragic hours.
She knew she had Ed’s attention when he stopped gnawing on the chicken bones.
‘You don’t have to tell me if it’s too painful.’
‘No, I want to. Someone should know the truth.’ It was on the tip of her tongue to ask him for his discretion but given his loyalty to her thus far it would’ve been an insult. Especially when he’d laid his own personal life bare only moments before.
‘If this is something I need to sign a non-disclosure agreement for before I hear it, you might want to rethink that idea.’ He offered her an out, most likely aware of the significance of the event itself as well as what it was taking for her to confide in him. This story would earn a fortune in the wrong hands. Thankfully, she was aware of how safe and strong Ed’s hands were.
‘I trust you.’ The words almost caught in her throat, her body trying to hold onto them because she was so unused to saying them.
He wiped his hands on a napkin and sat up straighter. ‘I’m listening.’
Georgiana closed her eyes so she could see a picture in her mind of her brother in happier times. It was getting harder to remember Freddie before he succumbed to the darkness hounding him but there he was, smiling back at her. They were physically alike—he was tall and willowy with a shock of dark hair—but that was where the similarities ended.
His wardrobe choices were more flamboyant than hers. He had a wicked sense of humour where Georgiana had been the sensible one of the pair. Trying to keep him out of trouble and usually failing. He had as much trouble accepting their limitations as part of the royal family as she did. Only he’d kept his pain mostly to himself. If she’d known, if she’d been able to help him stand up to her parents and the regime that rejected the idea of a prince who didn’t fit in with their ideals, he might be here now calling her Hopalong or something equally inappropriate.
When Georgiana opened her eyes Ed was watching her intently. He held out a hand to hold hers.
‘Are you okay?’
She squeaked out an affirmative. With the unexpected physical contact and his eyes full of concern, she didn’t think she could hold it together for much longer. So, she got straight to the point.
‘Freddie was gay.’
Ed was still holding her hand.
‘He never came out to us but we all knew. We all pretended otherwise. A gay prince didn’t fit in with tradition, you know?’
‘I can see that.’ His hand on hers gave her the strength to carry on no matter how tough it was in the retelling.
‘He did his best to conform for our sake but he must’ve been so unhappy.’ Her voice cracked as she imagined the pain Freddie had gone through, knowing he wasn’t wanted in his truest form.
Ed scooted forward so his knees were bent and he was face to face with her. ‘I’m sure that wasn’t your fault.’
‘I didn’t do anything to help. He clearly didn’t think he could talk to me about anything or ask for my help. It was an overdose. None of us saw it coming. Afterwards, none of us were allowed to discuss it. Instead of raising public awareness about the issues of mental health or some introspection about what had led him to take his own life, we were supposed to sweep it under the carpet. A tragic accident if anyone asked. They didn’t learn anything from Freddie’s death and kept on pretending everything was fine. I couldn’t take any more.’
‘That’s when you joined the army?’
‘Yes. I wasn’t prepared to play along any more. I needed to separate myself from the whole suffocating regime. None of us are perfect but we have a right to be happy. A right to be ourselves. I signed up because I wanted to do something meaningful and make a difference.’ She wasn’t sure she’d achieved anything except prove she couldn’t escape her destiny as part of the royal family.
‘I’m sure you did to the men and women you served alongside. You certainly did with Hannah and her family today and I’m sure you will with the rest of our patients. You’re an amazing woman, Georgiana.’ He was so close to her, saying all the things she needed and wanted to hear, and it was all she could do not to bury her head in his chest and lose herself in his embrace. She’d been strong for so long on her own and Ed was the one person with whom she could let go. He’d take care of her if she asked him to. Goodness knew she was close to doing so.
The office door suddenly burst open and Ed dropped her hand as if it were suddenly something contagious. A tall, owlish man a good ten years younger than him stood staring at them.
‘Sorry. I didn’t realise you were here. I saw the light on.’
Ed jumped to his feet and helped her into a standing position. ‘We were running through a few ideas for the clinic. Georgiana, this is my partner, Giles.’
There was that moment all too familiar to her as he pondered how to react to the introduction. To save any awkward attempt at a bow she stuck out her hand first.
‘Pleased to meet you.’
A look of relief flashed across his face as they shook hands. ‘It’s an honour to have you here. I heard you made quite an impression today. Welcome on board.’ Giles was beaming at her. It made her irrationally happy when Ed had made out he was a difficult man to please.
‘Thanks.’
‘If I’d known you were still around, Giles, I’d have saved you some chicken.’ Ed gathered the empty takeaway cartons and dumped them in the waste bin.
Giles wrinkled his nose. ‘No, thanks. I’m sure we could’ve arranged a proper meal for our visitor, Ed, if you’d told me we were entertaining.’
Georgiana did her best not to smirk at the glare Giles directed at Ed, promising to have this out with him later.
‘It’s fine. It’s not often I get to eat “normal” food.’
‘Yeah, she’s slumming it with the common people tonight. Eating with her fingers on the floor instead of silver service in the banquet hall.’ It was difficult to tell which of them Ed was teasing, her or Giles, but this time she wasn’t the one rolling her eyes at him.
‘In that case I’ll leave you to it. Lovely to meet you, Ms Ashley.’ This time Giles did give a half-bow before he took his leave.
‘I don’t think I’ve ever seen Giles quite so awestruck. I think I should keep you around for a while.’ Now she knew it was her he was teasing she didn’t mind when he was talking about continuing their association. It wasn’t a doctor/patient set-up, nor was it strictly speaking a working relationship. The truth was she didn’t know how to describe their pairing and that made it something new and exciting.
‘Why, thank you. I’m truly privileged.’ She also enjoyed the jovial atmosphere they cultivated so easily. Ed didn’t alter his personality to suit her. Something rare in her social standing.
‘He’ll be calculating how much our shares will go up if we have a princess on staff.’
‘Well, he seems very charming. He definitely has better manners than you.’ Georgiana crumpled up a rogue fries packet left on the floor and tossed it at him but his quick reflexes saw him catch it easily.
‘Ouch, and after I pulled out all the stops to impress you.’ He clutched his chest as though fatally wounded. This man was too much. Too funny, too pretty and way too much of a complication for her heart to be all of a flutter.
‘We’ve had dinner and annoyed your partner. Is it time to call it a night?’ Regardless of the crush she was having on Ed here, she didn’t want to outstay her welcome.
The realisation that was what was happening made her glad he couldn’t see her blushes. It wasn’t that he’d given her any indication that he saw her as anything other than another project. Apart from the way he’d come to her aid in the pool, bought her dinner, twice, and held her hand earlier. Oh.
‘I hope not.’ Before she could overanalyse his every look and touch as much as her own, Ed came to stand beside her. She was so aware of him now the air between them seemed thick and charged with something new.
‘I meant what I said earlier. I’d love you to be a mentor here. If you’d prefer something on a full-time basis I’d be happy to take you on at the clinic if you wanted to retrain in a medical capacity?’ His belief in her was intoxicating. He really thought she was capable of anything. Such a contrast to those who’d written her off. Including herself.
‘I’ll think about it. Tell me more about the charity you’re setting up. Other than talking to people and getting funding for prosthetics, what else do you have to achieve?’ There needed to be something long term to sustain the momentum.
‘I had toyed with the idea of a sports event. There are games held for disabled athletes and wounded veterans but I thought we could have something similar for our kids. Eventually branching out into an international event.’
‘That’s a brilliant idea.’ She thought of all the other people who’d had their dreams stolen from them with the loss of their limbs and who needed something else to focus on rather than the life left behind.
By first bringing Hannah to her attention, Ed had given her a renewed sense of purpose and achievement. To the point where she wanted to continue that work. They could do the same for others by introducing this sports programme.
‘It would take a lot of organisation and dedication.’
‘I’m sure you’re up to the challenge.’
‘I hope so. I thought we could get some of our well-known athletes with disabilities to help with motivation or even training.’ He produced a list of recognisable names.
Now she’d got to know Ed it was clear he thought much more about others than himself. As if he needed any more brownie points in her eyes. At this rate she’d be starting a fan club for him before too long.
‘I might be able to get some veterans on board. I met quite a few at the rehabilitation unit.’ It occurred to her that, so far, she wasn’t contributing a whole lot to this meeting except for making eyes at her colleague.
‘That would be fantastic. The more inspirational mentors we have who’ve experienced the same struggles as our patients, the more they’ll benefit.’
‘I’ll get in touch with some of my old army buddies and see what I can come up with.’
‘If you can get a list of people together who are willing to participate I can show it to Giles.’
‘I get the impression he doesn’t know that this is happening?’ Ed had been careful not to mention any of this in his presence.
‘He’s aware I have an interest in building a charitable arm for the clinic so I would have to consult him. However, I’d prefer to present it to him as a fully formed plan.’ He was already scribbling notes, his mind working overtime on how to make it all work. Georgiana admired his dedication. Among other things.
‘If you don’t mind me asking, why are you doing this? I mean, obviously it’s going to help those families who couldn’t otherwise afford to fund these things, but what’s in it for you?’ It wasn’t that she thought he was doing it for accolades or recognition for his altruism, but she was interested to know what drove his passion for it. For her it was a deeply personal issue on many levels.
She could relate to those going through the process of amputation and rehabilitation. Ed was already so in demand to those closest to him—she didn’t dare include herself in that group—it didn’t make sense why he’d take on another time-sucking task.
‘I told you about my brother, Jamie? Well, we were told he’d never be able to walk. I think in the old days they wrote you off if you had any sort of disability. Our mother and father put as much time and effort in with him as they could to stimulate him, did physiotherapy with him. If they’d sat back and accepted his limitations he wouldn’t be living a normal life now.’
‘It was their dedication that pushed him to break those boundaries they were told to expect.’ Georgiana suspected it was also down to their loving eldest son, who allowed that to happen. He’d said he’d practically raised his other siblings. Although he didn’t see it as a sacrifice of his childhood since it had allowed his brother to have one too.
‘Exactly, and I want these children to have every opportunity to do the same. Make every therapy, each new bit of technology that could enrich their quality of life, available to them. Money shouldn’t be an obstacle to a child fulfilling their potential. I’m not in this for me or the clinic. This is for every child who has had a difficult start in life like my brother. Every loving family who wants the best for their babies.’ His impassioned speech, coming from so deep within his heart, left nowhere for him to hide his feelings. Eyes filled with liquid emotion and voice wobbly, he was drawing from his own heart-wrenching experience watching his brother’s fight.
In that moment she could feel his passion, his pain at being so powerless at the time and a vulnerability in him she would never have expected to find. Ed was a man who loved unconditionally.
‘It sounds as though you went through a lot.’
‘It was Jamie who went through the operations, the bladder problems and the skin irritation. Everything that comes from living with spina bifida. It was my parents who put the extra time into his physical activity. Taking him to all his appointments so he could reach his full potential. Not everyone has such supportive parents.’
‘Or such an amazing big brother.’
Ed ignored the praise. ‘There are kids with the condition who’ll never walk, but some have more use of their legs. We saw some families who either didn’t want to, or simply couldn’t, give the same time and commitment to their children with extra needs. They’re the ones who need the most help in later life. Jamie can get about most days without assistance and lives independently. Everyone should have that chance. The same goes for the children who want to get involved in sports and it’s only the matter of money stopping them from fulfilling their potential too.’
‘That’s all very admirable but you don’t have to do it all alone, you know.’ Georgiana could see and hear what was driving him to work so hard on the behalf of others, but she worried he was doing it at the expense of his own needs. He’d already lost one relationship over it.
‘Says Miss
Independent,’ he countered with a sardonic smile to make her laugh.
‘Yeah, I know, but I’ve had this really irritating voice in my ear for days now making sure I stop feeling sorry for myself and get out of the house.’
‘I’m an irritating voice? Wow.’
‘You know I’m joking. Without you I’d still be locked in my room doing my Greta Garbo impression.’
Her ‘I want to be alone’ motto was becoming more like ‘I want to be with Ed’ these days.
Ed shrugged. ‘I could see your pain but I also understood that need to do everything yourself. It seems easier to do things that way. Then you’re the only one who gets hurt.’
She related so much to everything he was saying. They’d both chosen to shut themselves off from the world rather than run the risk of getting hurt again. ‘Yeah, but look what we’ve achieved together. Ethan, Hannah’s family and that woman at the pool—we worked as a team to save the day. It doesn’t always have to be a bad thing to get help or ask for it. You’ve taught me that.’ The smile on her lips was interrupted by the touch of Ed’s as he leaned forward and kissed her.
Eyes closed, heart hammering, she shut out everything around her except the soft pressure of his mouth on hers. It was unexpected but it also seemed natural after they’d been so intimate with their emotions. She sighed into the kiss, enjoying the sensation and excitement of exploring this new development with him.
All of a sudden that delicious pressure was released. She opened her eyes to see Ed had moved back, looking stunned, as if he’d been zapped with a thousand volts of electricity.
A creeping sense of unease made its way through her body. Rather than wanting to make mad passionate love to her, he was pulling away from her.
‘Ed?’ All her insecurities came rushing back. Why on earth had she thought a handsome, kind doctor would be attracted to a woman with so many obvious issues? He’d probably only kissed her because he felt sorry for her. She hadn’t been subtle in her admiration of him.
