My Surprise Secret Baby (Romance Box Set)

by Lexi Wilson

  Chapter 17

  Zia

  “Give it a rest already!” Kira said with a laugh. I had checked my phone every chance I got throughout the weekend, and it had only gotten worse when Monday arrived and I still hadn’t heard anything from Josiah.

  “Sorry!” I said. “I just don’t know why he hasn’t called or texted or anything. I mean, what gives?”

  “He stopped by to personally tell you he was going out of town. I would think if anything that means that he cares about what you think,” she said.

  “But he said he was going to be handling family stuff. I mean, I’d think that he’d have the chance at some point just to check in. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I’m driving myself crazy checking my phone so much. Am I in love?” I asked.

  She laughed again. “You might be. You’re acting like a love-struck teenager.”

  “Well, I’m pretty sure that I am love-struck,” I told her. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, and no one has ever had this sort of effect on me.”

  “You’re certainly worried about what he’s doing,” Kira commented. “But don’t worry about it. He told you he’s going to see you this week, so why not just take a deep breath and let him handle it? He’ll reach out to you when he’s ready, I’m sure of it.”

  “I hope so,” I sighed. “Anyway, this day is flying by. One more class before lunch.”

  “Want to sit together?” she asked. “I hate the first week of any school year, even as an adult. I would rather not have to go around and try to make friends, if you know what I mean.”

  “I get it,” I said with a nod. “I’ll come find you when I’m out. Chemistry is next for me, what about you?”

  “History,” she said. “Oh boy.”

  “At least that doesn’t sound as hard as chemistry,” I laughed.

  “It just sounds a lot more boring. I liked science way more than dead people who did things we argue about today,” she replied.

  “You’re not wrong,” I said. “Anyway, I better get going, I want to get a good spot.”

  “See ya,” Kira gave me a small wave as she turned to head toward her own class, and I felt a flutter of nerves run through me. I always felt this way the first day of any school year myself. Nerves and excitement, wanting to do well and make friends, but also nervous I was going to make a fool out of myself.

  Even now, as an adult, I wanted to fit in with the rest of the class. Sure, we were all adults just like the teacher, but he still felt like he was above us, and I was still worried bullying could be a thing. I would hope that the people in college were more mature than that, but it was hard to say with the world I lived in.

  It didn’t take me long to find the chemistry classroom. I had a vague idea where everything was in the school already, but it was made even easier by following a couple of students I overheard were also on their way to the same class. I stayed far enough behind them so they didn’t know I was using them to get to the right room, but close enough that I felt like I knew where I was going.

  When I got to the class, I found a seat right up front. If there was one thing I remembered from being in high school, it was that being up front was best for science. I would be able to see everything without having to strain, and it would make taking notes a breeze. I hoped we weren’t going to have to do a lot of work being the first day, but it was hard to say with the way professors were in college.

  There were some who were more interested in getting to know the class and the names of the students, then there were those who were eager to dive into the curriculum and happily handed out homework despite the fact it was the first day.

  I already had enough homework to keep me busy most of the evening, and I didn’t want any more added on. I wanted to have time to hang out with Josiah if he was around, and if I had school to deal with, I knew I wasn’t going to be able to.

  I couldn’t choose him over the classes. I was working hard to get through school, and I wasn’t going to be the girl who let a guy get in the way of her dream of making it to the degree.

  No matter how hot he was.

  “Hey, we’re in the same class!” a guy I’d met in philosophy sat down in the seat next to me. “What are the chances of that?”

  I smiled. He was cute, but I didn’t care. I only had eyes for one man in my life, and it didn’t matter to me how much I was hit on from the other students. They might be on the same level as I was as far as the school was concerned, but that didn’t matter, either.

  What mattered to me was getting through my day so I could text Josiah and tell him about it. I wasn’t going to tell him about the flirting I received; there was no need to make him feel insecure or rock the boat. I would just tell him about the classes and how well I did. Chemistry wasn’t my favorite, but I knew I could get through it, especially with the drive to impress him with what I could accomplish.

  I was sure even as an accountant he had to go through the same thing when he was in college, and I wanted to show him I could do the same, even if it wasn’t my strong suit.

  “That’s crazy!” I said with a warm smile. “I wonder how many other students we’re going to share multiple classes with.”

  “I don’t care, as long as I get to sit by a beauty like you, I’m fine with that,” he said.

  I gave him another warm smile, but I wasn’t going to encourage him. I felt strongly about cheating, and there was a part of me that felt even flirting with another guy could be seen as cheating when I was already with someone else.

  It didn’t matter to me if it wasn’t official with Josiah or not. In my mind, we were together, and I wasn’t going to jeopardize what I had with him for the sake of feeling attractive to someone who wanted to flirt with me.

  “You’re very kind,” I said, acknowledging him, but also giving him the distinct cue to stay in the friend zone where he belonged. I had a feeling I would be doing that a lot throughout the year. But if Kira could do it, then I could, too. No one liked to have attention from the opposite sex as much as Kira. But, since Mitch came into the picture, she had been so enamored with him, I’d seen her turn down more than one guy.

  And I would do the same for mine. Perhaps if I did it enough, I could work up the courage to talk to him about the fact I wanted the two of us to put a label on what we were doing. I didn’t want to have to explain it to anyone – the fact that the two of us were practically together, but not really.

  I wanted him to know without a doubt he was the one for me, and I wasn’t going to give another guy even a second glance. I had my mind made up, and nothing was going to change it.

  “Excuse me,” I turned my attention to my phone as I slipped it out of my bookbag. I knew it would be another hint to this guy that I wasn’t interested in talking to him about anything else, but more than that, I was hoping for a text from Josiah.

  I was tempted to shoot him a text and tell him that I was in class and things were going well so far, but there was something in me that told me to hold off a while longer. I would wait until I got home, and if he still hadn’t contacted me, then I would reach out to him and ask him how the weekend went. That would be a good way to get into what I had done with my day, too.

  It would be natural enough, I wouldn’t feel as though I was pushing anything, and he wouldn’t feel like I was being needy. At least, that’s what I was going to tell myself.

  I glanced up at the clock on the wall. The professor would be there any second, and I wanted to give him a good impression, so I slipped my phone back in my bookbag and sat straight in my seat, ready to greet him with eye contact and a smile.

  I was determined to be confident in my own skin this year, and I was going to stand out. I had always been the shy, quiet one, but this was going to be different. This was going to bring out a side of me I hadn’t ever embraced before, and I was excited at the prospect.

  In fact, I was so excited with the way the morning had gone, a shiver went down my spine as the clock struck eleven a
nd it was time for the professor to walk in. But nothing could prepare me for the shock that hit me as soon as he entered the room.

  Josiah himself walked in, heading straight for his desk at the front of the class. He set down a binder full of papers then cleared his throat before addressing the rest of us. I felt weak in the knees. Confused. Sick even. This couldn’t be right. What the hell was he doing here? He knew I was a student, but he never said a word about being a professor.

  Confused, I held it together as best as I could until he started addressing the class. He made eye contact around the room, pausing when he got to me. I wondered if he was going to say something. It would be the time for him to address something. Anything.

  But instead, he continued on with his introduction as though I wasn’t even there. It was like a slap in the face, and my chest felt tight. I wanted to scream at him. I wanted to demand in front of everyone why he had lied to me. But I wasn’t going to do that.

  I didn’t have the guts to say anything in front of anyone, and more than that, I didn’t have it in me to even sit through what he had to say. My thoughts were spinning, and I felt as though I could vomit right there in my seat. I grabbed my bookbag and rushed toward the door, diving into the hall and heading straight for the bathroom.

  I was surprised he didn’t say anything to me as I left. But then, he knew who I was, and he knew what he had been doing. Perhaps he didn’t have the guts to speak with me, either.

  Grabbing my chemistry book out of my bag, I still couldn’t fully believe I’d seen what I thought I saw. But, opening the book to the title page, I confirmed everything I’d been in denial over.

  Professor Josiah Bleid.

  I dove into a stall and pulled out my phone, searching him on the internet. Sure enough, I found out all I needed to know. He was a professor, and he’d been teaching in several different colleges throughout his twenties.

  I even found his university profile.

  So it was true. As sick as it made me to face the facts, there was no denying it now. I had been fucking the man who was my professor, and he hadn’t said a word about it. He knew that I was going to be going to school, and he knew I was attending this college.

  But he had chosen to lie to me about what he did for a living – which only proved to me he knew he was wrong. I had fallen for it, and I had been stupid enough to not even ask him what his last name was. I had gone along with the whole situation without giving a thought to finding out whether he was even being truthful with me.

  Of course, I didn’t make a habit of searching my love interests online, but Kira had warned me about being careful about the men I was seeing when I was in Chicago. I had passed it off as her being over-protective, but now I could see what she was talking about.

  I was sure I knew so much about him. I was sure I was in love with him. But now, I didn’t even trust myself to know who he was. He’d lied to my face, and he had let me believe it for nearly a month – all to get what he wanted from me.

  I wasn’t sure what to do now. I wasn’t sure how to get out of this. The only thing I knew for sure was that I couldn’t go back into that class.

  And I felt sick to my stomach.

  Chapter 18

  Josiah

  “That’s all for today. We’ll dive into the introduction on Wednesday. Dismissed,” I said. The class quickly rose and filed out of the classroom, eager to get to lunch before they had to get to their next class for the day. I knew many of them were excited about being in college, but there was still a sense of relief when the class was done for the day.

  For me, the hour couldn’t have dragged on longer than it had. When Zia got up and ran out, I had to bite my tongue to keep myself from calling after her. I wanted to tell her to stay and talk to me after class, but I couldn’t. I was supposedly just learning everyone’s names, and if I were to call out to her and tell her to stay behind, that would be sure to spark rumors among the rest of the students.

  But now that class was over, I wanted to find her and fast. I had to talk to her before she did something rash – like tell someone about our relationship. The students all knew as well as the professors that relationships were strictly forbidden, and she had to be confused right now.

  It had been my full intention to talk to her when I got back to Chicago. I wanted to let her know what was going on, and come clean about everything before we went through what had happened at the beginning of the class.

  I knew it wasn’t fair to her what I had done, and she had to be pissed off at me for doing it. By now, she would know that I lied to her, and she was likely furious over the fact that I had. But I hoped for the chance to at least talk to her and explain what was going through my mind – to tell her why I had done what I’d done and why I kept it up for so long.

  The university was enormous, and I knew it wasn’t going to be an easy task to find her with all the students milling about the halls and classrooms. There were hundreds of students on campus already, and they were all switching classes or making their way to lunch.

  I didn’t want to make it obvious I was looking for someone, so I wasn’t going to call out her name. I tried to stay calm and collected as I made my way through the hall, glancing into the classrooms on my way by, glancing at students who resembled Zia as they dug through their backpacks or laughed with their friends.

  It was discouraging, and there was a part of me that hoped she hadn’t gone home for the day. I had to talk to her. I had to have the chance to explain myself.

  I was so distracted with the need to find her, I wasn’t watching where I was going well enough, and physically ran into a student. Immediately, I recognized her as Kira, Zia’s roommate. We hadn’t officially met, and with the way she looked at me, I could tell she didn’t recognize me. I was grateful for that. The last thing I needed was for another person to know what was going on between me and a student.

  It was quickly becoming more complicated than what I wanted to deal with, and if another student were to become involved in this, I wasn’t sure how I would take care of things without it blowing up in my face.

  “Sorry,” I muttered.

  “No worries,” she said. She was texting while she was walking anyway, and she hardly gave me a second glance. Clearly, she had other things on her mind, but I was grateful for that. Normally, I would tell a student to put their phone away and watch where they were going, but I wasn’t going to draw more attention to myself than what had already happened by running into her.

  She continued up the hall, but I continued on my way in the opposite direction, still searching for Zia. She had to be around somewhere if she was still on campus, and with afternoon classes, I was sure she would be. Even with the shock she had just endured, I was confident she wasn’t going to leave the school for the day.

  That wouldn’t be the best way to start out her first day of college, and with her being so determined to do well, I was sure she was going to stick it out, even if she was avoiding me in the process.

  I’d already tried calling her before I left the class, but it went straight to voicemail. I tried it once more, hoping if she was gone, I would be able to catch her and talk to her on the way home. But, she either had her phone turned off, or she had blocked my number specifically, because it went straight to voicemail without even ringing once more.

  If I was going to find her, I was going to have to do it on foot. Or, I could call for her over the speakers in the halls, but that, too, would draw more attention to the fact I needed to talk to her, and I didn’t want to do that. I just wanted to speak with her and do my best to explain myself.

  And hope to God she would be at least a little understanding.

  Then, as I rounded a corner, I suddenly saw her. She was walking away from me, pushing her way through the sea of students as well. I wasn’t sure where she was heading on that side of the school, but the fact that I’d caught sight of her gave me hope I could catch up with her.

  I pushed harder to get through th
e hall, trying not to make a show of moving quickly, and, more than that, trying to catch up to Zia before she went into another class. I just wanted to catch up with her when she was still in the hall, then convince her that I needed to talk to her before she told anyone about what had been going on between us.

  She could get in trouble for it just as easily as I could, and I wanted to protect her from herself if she didn’t realize that. And I had to protect myself from the truth, too. I didn’t want the year to start off with a scandal, and I really didn’t want to wind up being fired from the school before the semester even started.

  That would be the end of my teaching career, and it would likely make the news, too. If I didn’t get the chance to talk to her, she might do something that would ultimately make both of our lives much harder than they needed to be, all because I was stupid enough to go through with a relationship with her despite the fact I knew it was against the rules.

  I pushed through another group of students, watching Zia disappear around another corner. I was gaining on her. She was moving fast, but she wasn’t moving as fast as I was. I had a mission to catch up with her. She was walking as though she was upset and didn’t want to talk to anyone.

  I didn’t blame her, that was for sure, but if I had the chance to talk to her, I might be able to help. I hoped so, anyway, or this was going to be a long, tedious year trying to work around her.

  Just as I reached the corner, I saw Zia getting into her backpack. Now was my chance. She was busy for the moment, and I could get close enough to her to talk to her without making a scene. All I had to do was get her to agree to meet and speak with me, and to keep her mouth shut.

  That would give me time to think about what I wanted to tell her, and more than that, it would give me the peace of mind she wasn’t going to go telling anyone and put us both in that position.

  But, as I passed the dean’s office, he stepped out into the hall. I normally would have stopped and spoken to him, but with Zia on my mind, I pretended like I hadn’t seen him. Clearly, though, he had to speak with me, and he didn’t have any issue calling out to me even among the sea of students.