by Anna Stone
Scared that the person she was before the accident no longer existed.
“Do you think you can do that for me?” Camilla asked. “Just try? Maybe not this morning, or even today, or tomorrow. But one day, in the time you have left living here with me, will you try to find the joy that art used to bring you?”
Lindsey blinked away her half-formed tears. “Okay,” she said quietly. “I’ll try. I’ll try now.” She knew that if she put it off any longer, she’d lose her resolve.
Camilla kissed her gently. “Are you going to be okay?”
“Yes. I will.”
“If you’re not, come find me in my office. And remember, this room is yours, and yours alone. I’ll never come in here without your permission. If you need more supplies or anything specific that you can’t find in here, let me know, and I’ll get it for you.”
Lindsey nodded.
“I’ll leave you to it.”
Moments later, Lindsey was alone in the room. She felt so overwhelmed. Where should she even start? She hadn’t picked up a pencil or a paintbrush since she’d finished her art degree. Did she still have it in her? That passion that fueled her creativity? That sense of wonder about the world around her, and that need to capture it all on a piece of paper or canvas?
Could she ever get that passion back again?
Lindsey didn’t have a choice but to try. Camilla had decreed it. Sure, Lindsey didn’t really have to listen to her. But she knew that if she didn’t, Camilla would be so disappointed.
She gazed out toward the garden just outside. This particular garden was filled with bright, colorful lilies. The sky was clear and the morning sun cast dappled light through the leaves of the nearby trees. As Lindsey looked on, a tiny bird flew down to perch on the edge of a birdbath in the center of the garden.
Seriously? The scene couldn’t have been more picturesque. Clearly, it was a sign.
Lindsey glanced over at the desk. On top of it was a sketchpad and an assortment of pencils and boxes of charcoal. She grabbed the sketchpad and a stick of charcoal, pulled a chair over to the window, and sat down.
Taking a deep breath, she put the charcoal to the paper and began to sketch.
Lindsey put her sketchpad down in her lap. It had taken her several attempts, but she’d finally managed to capture the scene before her in a way that she didn’t hate. The lighting wasn’t right, and the leaves on the trees were nothing more than vague scribbles, but it was a lot better than her first few attempts. The floor around her was littered with crumpled up balls of sketch paper.
Lindsey looked around. She was sure there was a clock in here somewhere. She spotted the old timepiece on the sideboard and gasped. It was 12:30. She’d been in here for hours! And she was late for lunch with Camilla. Lindsey cursed. One of Camilla’s rules was to stick to the schedule.
And Lindsey had learned her lesson about breaking Camilla’s rules.
She returned her sketchpad to the desk, and dashed out into the hall, heading for the dining room. When she reached it, she almost knocked June over outside the doorway. Lindsey murmured an apology and entered the room.
Camilla was sitting at her place at the table, flicking through a newspaper, her empty plate pushed aside. She looked up at Lindsey. “How nice of you to finally join me.”
“I’m sorry, Mistress!” Lindsey said. “I lost track of time. I was working on a sketch.”
“In that case, I’ll let it slide.” Camilla pushed out the chair next to her. “Sit. June will bring you lunch.”
Lindsey sat down, her stomach rumbling. She hadn’t realized how hungry she was. Almost immediately, June appeared and set down a plate of sandwiches before Lindsey, then disappeared again. Lindsey began to wolf them down.
“I take it you were enjoying yourself?” Camilla asked.
“I don’t know if enjoying is the right word,” Lindsey said. “It was difficult. And frustrating. It was like I’d forgotten everything I’d ever learned. But after a while, it all came back to me.” A smile spread across her face. “God, I’d forgotten what that felt like. To get so lost in something that it’s like the rest of the world just fades away. It’s a great feeling.”
“I’m happy for you,” Camilla said. “And I’m proud of you.”
A warm flush washed over her. “You were right. I just needed a little push.”
After a few more minutes of conversation, Camilla got up and placed her hand on Lindsey’s forearm. “I have to go make a few work calls. But once you’re done with lunch, come find me in the library and we can spend a bit of time together. Unfortunately, I need to get some work done, but I can do it with you there.”
“Okay, Mistress.”
Lindsey finished off her lunch, then left the dining room, nearly barreling June over for the second time. She apologized again, then headed to the library. She didn’t know why she was in such a hurry. The events of the morning had filled her with nervous energy.
Lindsey knocked on the door.
“Come in,” Camilla said.
Lindsey entered the library. It was one of the smaller rooms in the house, consisting of little more than a desk and two armchairs. But every inch of the walls, from the floor to the high ceiling, was covered in shelves packed with books. A tall ladder on wheels leaned against one wall.
Camilla was seated in the armchair flicking through some papers. She looked up at Lindsey. “I hope you didn’t have trouble finding this place.”
“I’ve been in here before,” Lindsey said. “It’s pretty impressive.”
“This was my mother’s library. I like to come here to work when I feel like a change of scenery. You’re welcome to borrow any of the books. My mother’s collection is quite large and varied.”
“Okay. Thanks, Mistress.”
Camilla gestured toward the floor by her feet, where a thick velvet cushion lay. “Come sit with me.”
Lindsey walked over to her and sat down on the cushion, her legs out to the side. After a moment, she leaned her head against Camilla’s legs.
Camilla’s hand dropped down to stroke the top of Lindsey’s head. “You know, I’d love to see your art someday. That is, if you ever feel comfortable showing it to me.”
“Sure,” Lindsey said. “It might be a while until I have anything worth showing you, though. I’m out of practice.”
“That’s okay. Whenever you’re ready.”
They lapsed into silence. For a few minutes, the only sounds were the scratching of Camilla’s pen and the occasional murmur from Camilla.
Lindsey looked up at her. “Mistress? Can I ask you some questions?”
“You can ask me whatever you like,” Camilla said, her focus still on her work. “I might even answer you.”
“Well, when you told me about endometriosis, you said to look it up. And I did, but it was all medical stuff. I guess I was wondering what living with it is like for you?”
“Well, it isn’t the most glamorous of illnesses,” Camilla said. “It’s like having horrendous period cramps while constantly feeling exhausted and awful in general. Most of the time it’s manageable, but sometimes, it can floor me for days, or even weeks. You’ve seen how bad it can get for yourself. Mine is a relatively severe case though.”
“But, isn’t there anything you can do about it?” Lindsey asked. “Doctors? Medications? Treatments?”
“Trust me, I’ve seen the finest specialists in the country, and I’ve had every possible treatment. But the reality is that there’s a lot that medical science doesn’t know how to fix. Endometriosis is one of those things. There are little things that help, but nothing that is actually going to cure me.”
“That sucks.” Lindsey couldn’t think of anything to say that didn’t sound inadequate. “I know you said not to feel sorry for you, but it just seems so unfair.”
“It does make things hard.” Camilla paused to study something on the page in front of her. “But, as I said, I’ve been dealt a good hand otherwise. I have this house and a
job that allows me to have a lot of flexibility, with me being the boss and all. And I don’t even need to work. I could live off my inheritance if I wanted to. But I don’t want that. My family’s company means a lot to me, so I’d rather work, even if it means sacrificing other things.”
“Like… relationships?” Lindsey asked.
“I have a few close friends. They’re all I need.”
“But, don’t you want to find love?” Lindsey’s question sounded childish, even to her.
“It’s just not a priority for me,” Camilla said. “I don’t have the time or patience for dating anymore. Besides, I’ve worked hard to build this life for myself. Adding another person to it complicates things. And I don’t like change.”
Lindsey wasn’t surprised that Camilla considered a relationship a ‘complication.’ She knew how much her Mistress hated any disruptions to her carefully organized life.
“That’s not to say I’m not open to love. If the perfect woman turned up on my doorstep, I wouldn’t turn her away.” Camilla patted Lindsey’s head, then grabbed a pen from the table next to her and began to scribble on the document she was holding.
It was clear that she was done answering questions. But Lindsey still had something she wanted to ask her Mistress. “What about…”
“Yes?” Camilla said.
“What about sex?”
“What about it?”
“Well, I read that for women with endometriosis sex can be… hard.”
“Yes, it can be for me under some circumstances. But I can still enjoy it. It just requires a lot of care. That’s why I prefer to take the reins, so to speak.”
“Is that why you’re a Domme?” Lindsey asked.
Camilla thought for a moment. “I suppose it is, in a way. But not in the way you think.” She put her pen and paper down in her lap. “My illness can be unpredictable at times. Sure, there are patterns, but I never really know when it’s going to flare up. When you’re dealing with a condition that has a lot of ups and downs, it’s easy to feel like you’re not in control of your own body, let alone your own life. It can be liberating to take that control back.”
“That makes sense,” Lindsey said.
“Of course, there are other reasons why I like being a dominant.” Camilla drew the back of her finger up the side of Lindsey’s cheek. Her voice dropped low. “There’s something addictive about making a submissive squirm.”
A flicker of lust ran down Lindsey’s spine. Camilla sure knew how to make her squirm.
“Now, as much as I enjoy your presence, I should get back to work. Why don’t you go take advantage of this lovely afternoon?”
“Okay, Mistress.”
Lindsey stood up and shook out her numb legs. She had pushed Camilla far enough out of her comfort zone for the day.
Before leaving the room, Lindsey paused by the door. “Thank you,” she said.
“For what?” Camilla asked.
“For pushing me this morning. I needed that.”
Camilla gave her a half smile. “I’ll see you at dinner. Try not to be late this time.”
Chapter Thirteen
“Lindsey?” June appeared in the doorway of the sitting room. “Faith has arrived.”
Lindsey thanked June and made her way downstairs. It was Friday evening. Camilla had left for her trip several days ago, and she was due back tomorrow night. Lindsey had spent most of the week enjoying the solitude of the grounds. But Camilla had been right. Lindsey was starting to feel lonely, so she was looking forward to having Faith around, even if it was just for one night.
By the time Lindsey reached the front door, Faith had hopped out of the car.
She spotted Lindsey and waved. “Wow, you weren’t kidding about this place. It’s huge.”
“Yep.” Lindsey pulled Faith in for a hug. She’d actually forgotten how awesome the manor was. After living here for a month, it had become normal. Going back to the real world was going to be a rude shock. “What do you want to do first? I can show you around?”
“Sure,” Faith said. “Let’s start with your room. I want to see all the stuff Camilla bought you.”
A few minutes and a greeting from June later, they were in Lindsey’s bedroom. Lindsey sat on the bed while Faith flicked through her wardrobe, squealing with excitement every now and then.
“If Camilla wants another sugar baby, I volunteer,” Faith said. “You get to keep all this?”
“Yep,” Lindsey replied.
Faith pulled out a long evening gown that Lindsey hadn’t even worn yet. “This would fetch a great price online.”
Lindsey hadn’t even thought about that. She’d barely thought about her money problems since she moved in. As promised, Camilla had deposited a generous allowance into Lindsey’s bank account every week since she’d arrived, but it wasn’t like she needed it. She had everything she needed here at the manor, and Camilla provided whatever Lindsey asked for. She’d practically forgotten that money was a part of the arrangement.
Faith hung the dress back up and joined Lindsey on the bed. “So, you’re getting paid to live in this huge mansion. You’re getting all this free stuff. And all you have to do is keep some rich woman company?”
“Pretty much,” Lindsey replied. “But Camilla isn’t ‘some rich woman.’ She’s Camilla. She’s pretty incredible.” She glanced sideways at her friend. “Besides, we’ve been doing more than just keeping each other company.”
Faith’s eyes widened. “Are you saying you’ve been sleeping with her?”
“Only a couple of times.” Even though that particular box had been opened, their relationship was still more about their routine, day-to-day power games than sex.
“And? Did you like it?”
Lindsey nodded. “A lot, actually. And I like her a lot.”
“Wow,” Faith said. “It sounds like this arrangement is really working out for you.”
“Yeah. It is.” Lindsey’s phone started to ring. She glanced at the screen. “It’s Camilla. I should take this.”
“Go ahead.” Faith grinned. “I’m sure you don’t want to keep her waiting.”
Lindsey ignored Faith’s comment and picked up the phone. “Hi, Camilla.”
“Camilla? That’s no way to address your Mistress.” There was a sultry edge to Camilla’s voice. “Do I need to get out the cane?”
Heat rushed to Lindsey’s face. Not to mention other places. She got up from the bed as casually as she could and turned away to look out the window so Faith couldn’t see her bright red face.
“Well?” Camilla said.
“Um, I’m hanging out with Faith at the moment.”
“Oh? And you’re too shy to call me Mistress in front of her?”
“Yes,” Lindsey said.
“If you ask me nicely, I might let it slide,” Camilla said.
Seriously? Lindsey peered over her shoulder at Faith, who wasn’t even pretending not to eavesdrop. “Please?” she mumbled.
“Well that didn’t sound sincere at all. I know what you sound like when you beg for real.”
A sharp, faint breath escaped from Lindsey’s mouth. She clamped her lips shut and stared even more intently out the window, trying not to think about the images Camilla’s words conjured up.
“Nevertheless, I’m a generous Mistress. I’ll let it go just this once.”
“Thank you,” Lindsey said.
“Tell Faith I said hello, and to make herself at home.”
“I will.” Lindsey looked back at Faith, who was sprawled out on the bed. “I should warn you, she’s already five minutes away from moving in.”
Faith stuck out her tongue.
“Well, she’s welcome to stay for a few days if you’d like,” Camilla said. “Speaking of which, I have some bad news. I have a lot more to do here than I expected, so I’m going to have to stay a bit longer. I won’t be back until Tuesday.”
“Oh,” Lindsey said. “That’s okay.”
“Let me make it up to you. I
’ve booked a reservation at my favorite day spa in the city for you and Faith. I hope you don’t already have plans tomorrow?”
“No, we don’t. Thank you!”
“It’s my pleasure. But you’re going to have to do something for me too.” Camilla’s voice took on that serious tone she always used when she made demands. “There’s a credit card in the top drawer of the desk in my study. I want you to take it with you when you go into the city tomorrow and buy something to wear the night that I come back.”
“What kind of something?” Lindsey asked.
“A dress, and some other pieces. There are several boutiques downtown that I frequent. I’ll send you their details, as well as some suggestions. Just mention my name, and they’ll help you pick out something appropriate. We’ll be having a dinner date in the garden. And after dinner, we’ll see where the night takes us. Maybe we’ll have dessert in the playroom again.”
Lindsey felt a throb of desire. “Okay,” she said. But ‘Yes, Mistress’ was what she really meant.
“I look forward to seeing what you pick out for me.”
Lindsey hung up the phone and turned back around. Faith was still stretched out on the bed, smiling.
“What?” Lindsey asked.
“Nothing,” Faith replied. “What did Camilla want?”
“She’s staying in Seattle for a few more days. She’s booked a spa day for us as an apology.” Lindsey fell down onto the bed next to her friend. “And, we’re going shopping.”
Lindsey slipped her jeans back on and pulled her blouse over her head, then flattened down her hair in the dressing room mirror. She and Faith only had ten minutes before their spa appointment. They’d been shopping all morning at Camilla’s boutiques of choice. The ‘suggestions’ Camilla sent Lindsey ended up being a set of specific instructions on what to buy.
It was typical of Camilla. Even when asking Lindsey to pick out something herself, Camilla was still pulling the strings. Lindsey didn’t mind. She was doing this for her Mistress, after all.
Besides, Lindsey had decided to get a little something to complete the outfit. Something that would really surprise Camilla.
