Island Cultural Center

by Marilyn Foxworthy

  We called Lisa to come inside and she sat on the sofa and found her seatbelt.

  Car closed the doors and said ominously, “Are you Lisa? Lisa Jackson?”

  Lisa looked startled and said, “Yes?”

  Car said sweetly, “I was just teasing you. I’m so happy to meet you Lisa! I’m Car. Don’t tell, but I’m a robot. Ready to go? If you are ready to go, please say the passphrase ‘Wiggly Waggly Puffle Toot Magoo Jubu Bam Richmond Finknottle’.”

  There was a pause and Car laughed and said, “Teasing again. Here we go,” and the car pulled back onto the road.

  The ride to Poipu, where there existed the world’s greatest hot dog stand, took less than half an hour. As soon as we were out of the populated area, Lisa and Charlotte undid their seat belts and started changing clothes. Brenda made me close my eyes. I had thought that I was finally going to get a look at Charlotte for the first time, but no. She’d seen me and Brenda stark naked, so I figured that Charlotte wouldn’t mind me seeing her as well. Brenda had other ideas.

  When I was allowed to open my eyes, Charlotte and Lisa were wearing dresses that matched Brenda’s but in different colors. At least now, for the first time, Charlotte had a shape. She was slimmer than I had imagined. And a bit bustier, too. Up until now, everything that Charlotte had worn was straight and formless and gave no clear hints about what was underneath. Looking closely, I could tell that they, like Brenda, were going without bras.

  The parking lot at the destination was less than half full. We parked next to another vehicle that was definitely made by the same people that made Car.

  Charlotte smiled and stretched as we stood up. Now that I was looking, there were several details that I hadn’t seen before. First, She was probably at least five-foot-eight. Two inches taller than Lisa, four inches taller than Brenda, and just three inches shorter than myself. I tried to guess her measurements, but instead pulled Lisa aside later and asked her. Charlotte was a slim and tall 34-D.

  The place where we stopped was an open-air shopping area with some higher-end clothing, gift, and jewelry stores. About a third of the businesses were food-related. The one we wanted was at the northeast end of the mall.

  As we approached, a man seated at a table with three women stood to shake my hand and we introduced our companions to each other.

  He said, “Hi. Mr. Jackson, I’m Robby Jensen. You met my brother. Hello Charlotte. Thank you for everything,” and she leaned in to let him kiss her on the cheek.

  He said, “Before we go farther, let’s order. Hey, girls, will you order for Roland and me? I’ll have lemonade and my usual. No, surprise me. Roland, step over here for just a second.”

  Robby led me a few steps away and said, “Man, am I happy to meet you. I didn’t plan to see you on this trip. I was going to let Tom handle everything, but last night some things came up and I thought that it would be best if we talked directly. And Tom won’t be back for another few days at least.”

  I said, “Mr. Jensen, it’s a pleasure. Thank you for all the VIP treatment at the resort and the suite and everything. I am very grateful for your generous hospitality, believe me. I don’t know what I can possibly do to warrant any…”

  Robby said, “First, call me Robby. You’ll see very soon that calling me Mr. anything isn’t going to work based on what I am going to tell you and your lovely family. But you are going to have some decisions to make.”

  I said, “Sir if this is about Charlotte, I have to say that I love her and if it weren’t for the difference in our ages, I would have no hesitation about her being part of my new family. As it is, if she wants me, she will be very welcome. If that changes anything between you and me. I’m sorry.”

  Robby smiled and said, “Ah, no, Charlotte makes up her own mind. But if she does join your family it just makes my part in everything that much easier. No, the decisions that you are going to be faced with aren’t about Charlotte. Just keep in mind that I’m here to help. You’ll see what I mean as we talk. Hey, let’s eat. Have you been here before?”

  I said, “I have. It’s one of the reasons to come to Kauai.”

  Robby said, “You have that right. Hey, we better hurry or we are going to miss the start. Sit down.”

  The eight of us took our seats at a round table with benches, Robby and I sitting opposite each other and our families between us.

  Suddenly, Brenda looked shocked and stared at one of the other women and said, “Heather!”

  The woman, who had been introduced as Buttercup, smiled and said, “Hello Diane. It’s so good to see you. I’m so glad that you’re happy. We have a lot to catch up on.”

  Robby jumped in and said, “Everyone, Brenda, or Diane as she used to be called, and Buttercup, who used to be Heather, are related. As I understand it, Buttercup is the younger sister of Brenda’s sister-in-law who was married to Brenda’s brother. So, you might say that they are semi-sisters and by extension, we are all related by marriage. Roland, it kind of makes you my semi-brother-in-law.”

  I said, “Ah, that’s cool.”

  Robby said, “But now that we’re started, there’s a lot more to this. I’ve been giving a lot of thought to how to break this to everyone softly and with as little shock as possible, but I haven’t found a way that doesn’t take forever and you’d figure out what was probably going on long before I got to the point. So I’m going to just say it and we’ll deal with each piece as it comes. Please, everyone stay calm and try not to faint or become hysterical. It’s all good news, but it might be a bit heart-wrenching. Ready?”

  He paused for us to consider our emotions.

  Then he said, “First, Lisa. Do you know Cupcake?”

  One of the girls smiled. She had been introduced as Cupcake. I was assured that it was her legal name. The same with Buttercup. The third woman was Lily.

  Lisa said, “No Sir. We haven’t met.”

  Robby said, “But you know Flower, right? Or at least know of her? She has some very exclusive lines of women’s fashion and lingerie. From now on, you’ll have an opportunity to sell those fashions if you want to. We’ll come back to that. But you’ve had some hard times in your life. I want to help make up for that.”

  Lisa said, “Sir, you’ve done so much for me already!”

  Robby said, “Not yet. But Lisa, I’d like to go over some of your background. I know that you might find it painful at first, but I have a really good reason. And Roland, if it seems to you that I’m bringing up painful issues for your loved ones, please believe that I only have your best interests and theirs at heart. All of this will be a blessing that you can’t yet imagine.”

  I agreed to keep an open mind.

  He said, “Lisa, you had a child.”

  Lisa started to cry and said, “I did. I was young. I was homeless. She was taken away from me. I thought it was probably best for her, but I have missed her every day since I lost her. My only hope is that she eventually found some happiness. I’d do anything to make it up to her. There’s nothing that I could have done at the time. I was so lost and alone.”

  Cupcake, sitting directly across the table from Lisa reached out and took hold of Lisa’s hands in compassion.

  And then she shocked us all by saying, “Hello, Mom.”

  Lisa snapped her head up and stared across the table.

  Cupcake said, “Mom, it’s OK. I didn’t know what had happened. But obviously, I’m fine now. And I still love you and don’t blame you for anything. I’m just happy to find you now.”

  Cupcake stood up and went and sat next to Lisa and let her cry on her shoulder.

  Robby said, “Life is a crooked road. Everything leads to the end but it twists and turns in hard ways along the path. Roland, you are my father-in-law. We didn’t know about Lisa and Cupcake until last night. Lisa was intersecting with us because of Charlotte, so some more extensive background checks were done and we discovered some surprises.”

  He went on, “Charlotte, have you told Roland and the others anything
about yourself?”

  Charlotte said, “No, Sir.”

  Robby said, “Do you mind if I do? Are you ready for that? If not, we can talk in private.”

  Charlotte said, “No, he should hear it.”

  Robby said, “Roland, you told me that there was a big age difference between you and Charlotte. I don’t think that’s true. Our Charlotte has unusual genetics and a medical history that makes her uncommon in several ways. Our Charlotte is 57 years old. Wait, that isn’t what I want to say. Charlotte was in the military for a short time. She contracted a strange blood disease but it took nearly 30 years to diagnose what was wrong with her. Charlotte has been clinically dead twice. Once during childbirth.”

  Charlotte whispered, “We don’t know if it was a live birth or not. I was never sure that it really happened. I was in a coma.”

  Robby said, “The father was a serviceman as well, but because of the circumstances, Charlotte was lost in the system and he never found her. He died in combat. A hero. The baby was born alive, but because Charlotte was incapable of raising her, and because she was mistakenly listed as deceased on some paperwork, the baby was given up for adoption. Everyone take a breath and remember how we were drawn by an unknown and irresistible force to the places that we are now. Char, Sweetie, we found your daughter. She loves you and no longer blames you for anything.”

  At that moment, the woman named Lily stood up and went to hug the sobbing Charlotte.

  Lily whispered, “Mom, it’s OK. I love you. I love you. I’m so happy to see you finally.”

  Robby said gently so as not to disturb the moment, “Roland, you are married to two of my mothers as well as my semi-sister.”

  I said, “Um, well, one, but OK. Wow.”

  Buttercup winked at me and mouthed, “Two.”

  The women continued to talk and cry and Robby moved to sit next to me.

  He said, “What do you think?”

  I said, “Mr. Jensen, I…”

  Robby said, “Roland, you’re family. My father-in-law. Twice. And my brother-in-law as well. And we were interested in you even before we knew these things. You can’t call me Mr. Jensen.”

  I smiled and said, “OK, Robby. What do I think? I think Tom is going to be pissed that he wasn’t part of this.”

  Robby laughed and said, “Tom is my older brother. He’ll be fine.”

  I said, “He was really upset about Charlotte.”

  Robby said, “He didn’t understand that Charlotte chooses her own assignments. I send Tom where I need him. Charlotte does what she feels a need for herself.”

  I said, “But you said that she’s what? 57?”

  Robby said, “Yes. There was some experimental gene therapy used in her treatment. She was beyond help, so we helped her. The results were positive. So, does that change things? Her age?”

  I said, “I don’t know. Um, I kind of had a more definite plan with Lisa and Brenda, but like you say, Charlotte is different. But you keep assuming that she will stay with me like the others. You are already calling her my wife, if I’m hearing you right.”

  Robby smiled and we ate a few bites of our hot dogs.

  After a few minutes, he said, “Like I mentioned, you have some decisions to make given the new relationships.”

  I said, “I guess I do. I had planned for us all to move back to my house in Blythe. But now, we have family here and I can’t ask the ladies to leave their daughters until they at least get to know them again. We’ll have to stay for, I don’t know, a couple of months, I guess. Robby, can we get Lisa’s condo back? It’s small, but we could manage. I’ll have to figure this out.”

  Robby said, “Forget the condo. It was way too small. Look, you have the suite for as long as you want. And as often as you want. I say let Lisa go ahead and quit her job. We hate to lose her, but I could easily give her a management position that only requires a few hours a week. Didn’t Tom already tell you that we have a place for you on the special projects team? That’s just Tom and Charlotte, but you would be an asset. What do you do now?”

  I said, “I write books.”

  Robby frowned and said, “Ones that have been published, or just for your own pleasure?”

  I said, “Nope. Fully published and making a living.”

  Robby said, “Cool. Do you want a suggestion?”

  I said, “Sure. Help me out. It’s not like I know what to do with any of this.”

  Robby said, “OK, stay here. Keep your house in the desert if you want to and travel back and forth. Become my agent. Let Charlotte work on projects that she wants to. She has her own budget. You take a job with Tom and work on other projects. Charlotte will show you what to do. Let Lisa work with Flower. She’s the head of my fashion empire. I have a lot of empires. Lisa is a genius and Flower will be happy to have her as a consultant. I’ll make sure that she doesn’t work any more than necessary so that you guys can be more or less retired. And as for living accommodations, the suite is yours. And everything you can charge to it. And full health coverage and benefits. And, you can keep Car.”

  I said, “Does Car belong to Tom?”

  Robby said, “Oh yeah. As far as he’s concerned, yeah, Car belongs to him. Tell you what, he’ll give it to you as a wedding present. I’ll suggest it to him and he’ll think it’s a great idea. Then he can make the generous gesture and be the hero. Tom’s a great guy. You’ll love working with him. I think you two are going to be really close when you get to know each other.”

  He took a drink of his lemonade and said, “Roland, you can’t imagine how easy this is for me. The suite and your meals and your compensation cost me nothing that I can even measure. Here, that’s my wedding present. Full use of the suite and every amenity the resort has, including meals, clothing, and activities, for at least five years. I’ll pay for your honeymoon. That’s it. A five-year all-expenses-paid honeymoon. What do you say to that? And I don’t me say thank you, I mean, will you accept it?”

  I said, “I will. I’m learning not to play games. If you say you want to do that, I’ll take you at your word. Thank you. It’s very generous. But yeah, I think a five-year honeymoon is a great idea.”

  Robby clapped me on the shoulder and said, “Great! And as far as a job, it’s more like being a special agent than work. Tom will tell you all about it.”

  Then Robby spoke into the air, presumably to someone on the ear-piece that he wore the same way that Tom did, saying, “Alice. Did you get all that? Make Roland’s family permanent guests with all the privileges we can give them. Tell Car to work for them now. Yes, Sarah is already taking care of the marriage stuff, but have her prepare Charlotte’s as well. And send Roland a ring that matches for her. Do all the benefits and medical and all that. Great. Love you.”

  When he was done, I took a deep breath and sighed.

  Chapter 17 - Conflation

  I whispered, “Well, I guess there’s only one thing left to do, isn’t there? I need to ask her.”

  Robby said, “Wait. You need the ring. Alice, how fast can you get that ring to us? Ah, I see. Great. Do it. We’ll go there after we finish eating.”

  Then, to me, he whispered, “We’ll go shopping. You can ask her as soon as we leave here. The ring will be waiting. I’ll take you. Dude, stop worrying. She’ll say yes. You already know that she will. Finish your lunch. Man I love my life!”

  I watched the girls as they talked with each other, the semi-sisters getting reacquainted and the mothers and daughters getting to know each other for the first time. It looked like they could go on for a long time. But I wanted to take care of this. I looked to Robby, but he nodded at me as if I was the one to initiate things from here.

  I said, “Hey, everyone, I know that we have a lot to talk about, but let’s move on. We’ll go for drinks and sit for as long as we want to in a little bit. One of the reasons for coming out today, aside from the incomparable excitement of finding out about how we’re related and reuniting Charlotte and Lisa with their daughters, is beca
use we need to get a few things for Charlotte. Lisa, can you get the clothes that you want her to wear here?”

  Lisa exclaimed, “Yeah. They have at least two nice shops. We’ll find everything but lingerie.”

  I smiled and said, “Good. Let’s go, unless someone has a reason not to make this a working visit?”

  There were no objections and I stood up to lead the way. I didn’t really lead though. I didn’t know where we were going. Robby did. I led but he guided me where I should lead to. Our first stop was a really nice jewelry store that specialized in island-themed designs. Tahitian pearls, polished koa wood, silver, blue gemstones, things like that. And not the kind that the sidewalk shops that catered to cruise ship passengers carried. This was way up there. Some was affordable by “normal people”, and that was probably what we were after.

  Lisa said, “Oh, jewelry. Perfect. This is a great store. What do we need ladies?”

  As the women looked around, I went to the counter the way that Robby told me to and asked if they had something set aside for me. The girl handed me a ring box with a smile.

  I stood in the middle of the store and said, loudly enough for everyone to hear me, “Hey, what about this? Come here for a second.”

  The family gathered around to see what I wanted them to look at. Stepping in front of Charlotte, I immediately dropped to one knee and held out the little box and opened it.

  Looking into her eyes I said, “Charlotte, marry me.”

  Charlotte smiled and said, “Is that a question?”

  I said, “It is not.”

  I reached for her hand and took the ring and started to slip it onto her finger.

  She grinned and said, “Sir, I can’t marry you.”

  I felt a panic at her words and I’m sure that my face went white.

  I said quickly, “Why not? Charlotte, I love you. I thought that you would want this. Now that I know that you are the same age I am, I thought that you would want to be with us.”

  Charlotte’s expression changed to one of mocking puzzlement and she said, “Oh! You mean become your wife! Yeah, I’ll do that. The way that you worded it, I thought you meant that you wanted me to perform the wedding ceremony, the way that I did for you and Brenda and Lisa. Obviously, I can’t marry you to me. That would be officiating my own wedding. That’s kind of against the rules, I assume.”