“Will he?” Mace asks, a smirk on his face as he regards Prez.
“Probably,” Demon responds, fondly looking in the direction his woman disappeared in and gives a resigned shake of his head. “Come on. Everyone’s waiting.”
The conversation dies down quickly as we enter our meeting room, brothers all dying from curiosity, wanting to know why we’ve yet more strangers on the compound, female ones at that.
Thunder looks across the table at Mace. “You got a new habit of picking up strays?”
“First one wasn’t interested, Brother. See how soon he’s moved on to the next?” Pyro thinks he’s a barrel of laughs.
“Alright, zip it.” Demon bangs the gavel. “Who’s going to start? Liz or Mace.”
Pressing my fingers to my forehead, I let Mace carry on. I’ve got another of my fuckin’ tension headaches that’s starting to build. Knowing the punchline, I concentrate on fighting back the pain, content to let him bring everyone up to speed.
“Liz?”
When I look up, it seems like it’s not the first time someone’s been trying to get my attention.
“Headache?” asks Mace, his voice carrying both concern and sympathy.
“Here.” Paladin shoots a packet of Advil down the table. Gratefully, I swallow a couple dry.
“What d’you need?” I say at last, hoping the tablets work quickly.
“We were talking about Esme’s tat, whether at her age, it’s better to get laser treatment to remove it.” Prez’s words are spoken tightly, and I glance around, noting all my brothers’ faces look thunderous. Though I’d zoned out of the discussion, I take it they’re as fucking upset by the situation as I am.
When I place my head into my hands this time, it’s not just to ease the ache, it’s because I’m thinking. Finally, I respond. “That shit will take multiple treatments, and the tats coloured as fuck. The writing is black, so they’ll be able to get rid of that, but the likelihood is they’ll only be able to fade the rest, and something of it will remain. It’s best done by a professional, someone who knows what they’re doing. Removal is not without pain and can easily get infected. I don’t know if she’d be able to look after it well enough, even with Shayla’s help.” My hands clench as I think of the bastard who’s the reason we’re discussing removing a tat from an underaged and mentally challenged girl. “I’d prefer to cover it.”
“I wonder where she’s from?” asks Pal. “Surely, a kid like that would be missed? It’s not as if she’s an unruly teenager likely to run off.” He pauses. “Unless she was already being treated like shit.”
Cad nods. “I’ve been thinking that myself. You’re right, Pal. It seems unusual for a girl like that to just be walking the streets and be picked up. The woman got any idea how they took her?”
Mace answers, “She didn’t say. Esme just appeared one day. I don’t know if she was able to tell her. Right now, she’s not talking, so it’s hard to know what her level of comprehension is.”
Cad nods at him. “I can discreetly start looking to see if anyone’s asking questions. If she’s got a loving family, she might be missed. Even a care home would be looking for her.”
“She might have shit parents who sold her for cash because they couldn’t be bothered to fuckin’ look after her.”
“Don’t have much faith in the human race, do you, Rusty?”
“Seen too fuckin’ much, Brother,” the older ginger-haired biker responds to Judge. “She could have been with foster parents who found her too challenging.”
“Do you think Shayla will take responsibility for her, long-term?” Prez asks Mace, then includes me.
“Don’t know much about either of them,” I reply. “Just know I don’t want Major to get his hands back on them. He needs to be removed before they can think about a future.”
Beef says determinedly, “Only thing that man’s getting his hands on is a fuckload of pain and six feet of earth over the top of him.”
Growls, stomps of feet, and fists bumping on tables shows he’s just voicing what we all think.
Prez taps his fingers together, then gives us his thoughts. “Shayla looked nervous as hell when she came in. You’re the kid and woman whisperer, Mace.” He looks at the enforcer with a smirk. “Got any hints for how we should help them settle in?”
Mace rolls his eyes but sits forward looking serious. “I think her first thought was we might want to use her for ourselves.” He waves his hand in a downward motion. “Simmer down, told her that wasn’t the way of it, but she’s not going to trust easily. Not just her, the kid doesn’t want to talk in case she gets fuckin’ tasered or hit. Keep your distance, don’t touch, don’t crowd, and no mention that she’s got boobs or an ass, or not in her hearing.”
“Has she?” asks Sparky.
“She’s a bitch, what do you think?” Hell bats him around the head.
“I fuckin’ know that,” Sparky defends himself. “But are they nice?”
Mace groans. “That’s precisely what I’m saying. That’s not the way you should be thinking of her. Look, treat her as you would your sister. She’s out-of-bounds. And before you say you haven’t got one, Sparks, I fuckin’ know you have.”
“Sure wouldn’t want to fuck her.” Sparky puts his fingers in his mouth and pretends to retch.
Mace glares at him which shuts him up. “As far as Esme goes, she’s got this amazing talent. She can draw, really well. I think we ought to encourage that. Praise her, hang her fuckin’ pictures up. Show she’s worth more than what she was sold to provide. And,” he narrows his eyes again, this time his fierce expression includes all of us, “she’s a kid, so if you swear in front of her, cough up.”
“What?” Various people ask in various tones of astonishment.
“She’s already had me for five dollars,” I admit. “But Mace has got a good point. Men have been abusing her, not treating her as human. If you do swear, apologise and pay up. Putting a bit of dough in her pockets will make her feel valued.”
“A bit of dough? She’ll fuckin’ bankrupt us,” Bomber groans.
“Won’t do any harm to start watching your language when she’s about,” Prez remarks. “Theo’s starting to talk now, Mel’s expecting. Can’t reprimand kids if their role models use foul language.”
Bomber gasps. “We’ve got to pay them all? Christ, Prez, you’ll need to increase our wages.”
“Kids will end up richer than us,” Wills mumbles.
“Too fuckin’ right,” moans Rusty, to my mind sort of proving the point.
On that note, we break up.
“You okay, Brother? How’s the head?” Mace sounds and looks worried as he waits for me to leave the meeting room.
“Not good,” I reply honestly, touching my hand to my brow. “Think I’m going to lie down for a bit.”
“You made that appointment to have your eyes checked?”
“Yeah. Going on Wednesday,” I admit.
I never expected to end up wearing glasses, not until I was middle-aged, and I don’t feel I’m close to that. Isn’t that like when you’re fifty? But it’s probably down to the work that I do, always concentrating. Two things my job needs are a good eye and a steady hand. He pats my shoulder as I walk off toward the stairs.
After a couple of hours lying down in a darkened room, my head feels a lot easier. The rumbling of my stomach reminds me I’ve not eaten since the tacos I had with Mace at lunchtime. As I open my door, I find Steph leading a procession to the room next to mine. The one that used to belong to Skull, God damn his black soul.
“Okay, this is you.”
Shayla catches my eye and mouths, How does she do that? I shrug. I have no idea. Max isn’t even leading her, he’s sticking close to Esme’s side. I reckon Steph has counted the steps, and the number needed to reach any of the rooms and has them stored in her mind. Sure, being blind does hinder her in some things, but not as much as you’d think.
“Hi, Liz,” Steph greets me, and I’ve no idea
how she knows I’m there. I manage to refrain from sniffing my armpits. She ignores me after that, opening the door to the empty room and gesturing inside. “Prospects were told to get this place ready, but I can’t tell if they have or haven’t.”
“You’re spidey sixth sense doesn’t tell you?”
“Liz,” Steph admonishes with a laugh.
“Looks like they have.” Shayla gives a smile as she glances inside. “This will be great, Esme. Where’s the… oh, there’s a bathroom as well. It’s a palace, isn’t it?” She forces a smile as the girl beside her nods vigorously. I’m so full of admiration for this bitch, it’s unreal. But maybe caring for Esme helps her bury her own trauma to some extent.
“I’ll leave you to get settled. Come, Max.”
I watch, shaking my head, as Steph unerringly walks back to the stairs, holding my breath until her hand’s on the bannister. Then I turn back to Shayla, catching her before she follows Esme into the room. “You coming back down?”
Shayla shakes her head. “To be honest Lizard, I’m exhausted. I think we’ll just stay up here.”
I translate what she’s saying. “Shayla,” I start forcefully. “Nothing is going to happen to you here. I know it’s too early for words to make you believe it, but you can trust us.”
She offers a weak smile but betrays herself by glancing down and noticing the lock on the door. Then she catches my eye. “I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to trust anyone again.”
There such desolation in her voice it’s like a punch to my gut. “How long?” I ask, gruffly. “How f… damn long, Shayla?”
She doesn’t pretend to misunderstand. “A year or thereabouts for me. Thankfully less for Esme.” Now it’s her changing the subject. “Everyone’s been so kind to Esme, the women, and also the men.” She gives another one of those half-smiles, making me wonder what it would take to put a full one on her face. “Esme’s made a fortune already, haven’t you, Es?” Esme nods seriously, then looks around her new home, trying out the bed by jumping on it. I turn to go, Shayla stops me. “I can’t thank you enough, Lizard.”
“No thanks required.” I don’t need her gratitude for something any of us would have done.
“Yes, they are. And Mace who started that dollar for each swear word business? Pure genius to get Esme on board.”
I was quite impressed with my brother myself. Though I expect I’ll become much poorer for it.
Before she can fully close the door, there’s a streak of fur down the corridor and I’m not fast enough to grab the door handle as a very large cat missing an ear runs past me, jumping onto the bed where Esme’s now sitting. The girl grins, holds out her arms and that darn cat snuggles right into them.
“Er,” says Shayla, seeming not sure what to do.
“That’s Bitch,” I tell her. And fuck me, but Esme glares at me and holds out her hand. “Nah, not swearing, sweetheart, well not really. That’s her name. She hates men, none of us can go near her, but tolerates women and kids okay. She’s wormed and has no fleas so she’s fine if you want her in here with you.”
Shayla eyes the cat. “I’m not really a cat person, and I don’t know much about Esme at all, except that she loves animals big and small. So, if she’s not allergic, I think having the cat here will be good for her, if that’s okay?”
“Okay, darlin’? Keeping her out of our way will be doing all us men a favour.” I chuckle as I, at last, make my escape, and go find something to eat.
Chapter Fourteen
Vanna
“Hi, Mace, it’s Vanna.” I kick off my shoes and walk into my kitchen.
Mace’s voice thunders through the phone. “Hi, Vanna. You made your decision yet?”
“I think so, yeah. How’s Lizard?” To be honest, I’m still undecided whether to return to the compound or not, but Cas wants to go, and it’s worth suppressing my own hurt to see him smile. He’s also behaving better this week, and I’ll take that, even if he’s just doing it to persuade me to return to Pueblo. I’ll have to accept I’ll have to watch my husband being unfaithful. Maybe it’s time I dropped that label, when he seems perfectly happy with his stable of girls instead. Younger, prettier…
I force myself to concentrate on what Mace is saying.
“Lizard’s the same as he always is. Had a couple more headaches but he swears he’s okay.”
Now I stop thinking about me, but about Liz instead. “Has he had more since seeing me?” Am I doing him harm?
Mace is quiet for a second. “Not that I’m aware of, but I’m not with him night and day.”
I make my decision. “Okay. We’d like to come down at the weekend if that’s alright with you and everyone else there. I just didn’t want to come if my presence caused Lizard pain.” I’ll just have to suppress my own pain for Cas.
“Of course, you’ll be welcome. How’s Cas dealing with everything?”
Turning, I lean my ass against the counter. “He’s been a different boy this week. We’ve actually been talking without one of us wanting to throw something. He’s been thinking about the weekend a lot. We’ve discussed what it would be like if Lizard never recognised or acknowledged him, and he’s decided he still wants to come back. I think the bikes are a big draw, but so’s getting to know his dad. He says it’s good to find out about the man who is his father, whether Lizard knows that or not. I think it’s a comfort, understanding he didn’t intentionally leave him. If Lizard is half the man that he was, Cas will find a man he can respect.” I didn’t mention the little matter of Cas seeing him go off with different girls.
I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching over the past few days and have realised I need to let Lizard go. We’re only tied together in my head and on that piece of paper that makes it all legal.
“He’s certainly that,” Mace agrees. “But what about you? What are your expectations?”
“I’ve been thinking about that too, Mace. I can’t have any. Whoever Lizard once was, he’s not that man now. As you told me, the last thing he wants is a woman with a kid in tow. When we met, I was twenty, with a pre-pregnancy body. I’m now in my mid-thirties, and not the girl I once was. He won’t be magically attracted to me—”
Mace’s annoyed growl interrupts. “Don’t put yourself down.”
“Just saying it as it is, Mace. No, I can have no expectation of anything except closure. At the back of my mind, there was always the thought he might wake up one day and remember, but there’s not much chance of that now. Even if there was, me and Cas may not be right for him anymore, and I’d hate to force him into anything when it’s not what he’s after. All I want for him is to be happy and healthy. I think seeing him now is going to help me move past it. Maybe even move on and see if there’s someone out there for me.”
“You giving up on him, Vanna?”
“Never, no. But Mace, the last thing I want to do is hurt him. He’s reached a good place and he seems happy. Yes, I want Cas to get to know him, but I don’t want to screw his life up.”
Mace is quiet for a moment, then says simply, “You want me to come get you?”
“No, I can drive as I told you. Maybe we’ll come down Saturday morning, instead of Friday night?”
“You don’t want to come for our party?” A chuckle reaches me down the line.
I snort. “I think Cas might get fed up with going to bed early. Saturday will be fine, we’ll be there mid-morning, if that’s okay? I’ve been chatting with Mel. She’s going to do some baking and I said I’d help.” I’d gotten on well with her. Hey, look at me. Making friends. I smile to myself. Sure, I know some of the parents of the kids Cas is friendly with, but the only real confidant I have is Lindy. I frown slightly, of course, I can’t be completely open with any of the women at the compound. None of them can know the real reason I’m there.
“That’s great, you getting on with Mel. How did you find Beth?” The way he asks, I take it he’s got a soft spot for Ink’s woman.
“Good. She’s great, even if I ge
t a crick in my neck when I’m speaking to her.”
He barks a laugh. “I’ll expect you on Saturday then. Want me to take Cas to the shop for a few hours?”
“He’d love that Mace. Thank you.”
“No problem, sweetheart, I’ll teach him how to hotwire another car.” When I shriek, he chuckles and says quickly, “See you soon,” then ends the call.
I put down the phone, grinning and realising I’m looking forward to the weekend. It’s something to look forward to after the hell of a week I’ve had. Turns out my boss really wasn’t impressed with me taking leave on short notice, even if I’d had a good reason. I’m now on warning not to do that again.
Monday had been bad. I was called into the manager’s office as soon as I turned up for my shift. It was true, as he’d seen fit to remind me, I work hours to fit in with my son. Again, as he’d reminded me, my office skills weren’t exceptional, and I could easily be replaced. I suffered through the whole lecture, biting my tongue, reminding myself I needed this job to keep a roof over our heads.
Tuesday he’d tested me. Sending far too much work my way so I struggled to complete it in time. I hadn’t complained, he was just pointing out that work, which had piled up while I’d been off. It still had to be done. That any of the others could have done it was not the point. I’d suffered in silence and simply hoped things would settle down again.
Today had been slightly easier, but the lunchtime meeting with the social worker had been fraught when she’d asked if Cas had been in trouble again. I didn’t enjoy my capabilities as a mother being brought into question. I’d left her office, concerned that despite everything I’m doing, the decision may already have been made to remove my son from my care. It all hinged on whether they were going to give Cas a custodial sentence or probation. I hope for the latter and dread the first.
Satan’s Devils MC -Colorado Box Set: Books 4-6 Page 91
