Under a Greek Spell

by Simone Hubbard

  Just as I settle down, my phone bleeps into life with a text. I pull it out of my bag quickly feeling all excited that it might be Costas. But no, it’s Richard.

  Hope you’re OK.

  Just letting you know I’ve

  had a slight change of plan

  & I’m now island hopping

  around Greece. Phone

  signals not very good. x

  My immediate reaction is to reply:

  Yes Richard I’m fine

  NO THANKS TO YOU

  Why is it that now we’ve

  split up you’re happy to

  island-hop around Greece?

  Anyway, having a great time

  myself in Mykonos with a

  gorgeous Greek waiter so

  BOG OFF

  Oh, sod it. I’ll reply later or not at all. Just thinking about it is winding me up. I settle back down and do a bit of people-watching instead. A text from Helen distracts me from watching a woman who must have a fear of not getting an even tan.

  I’m back where r u? x

  I text back:

  Sunbeds near the pool. x

  I’m very tempted to add that I’m watching the funniest live show ever. The woman, who I guess to be in her early thirties, has adjusted her bikini now about fifty times. I never realised that you could make so many adjustments to such a small amount of material. She’s no sooner lain down that she’s tweaking here and tweaking there. I think she’s trying to optimise the amount of sun that each part of flesh is absorbing. Then she stands up again, adjusts the bikini and moves her sunbed by an inch here and an inch there. I’m worn out just watching.

  Within a couple of minutes Helen appears, looking like a dishevelled and harassed tourist.

  ‘I need a drink,’ she declares, throwing herself on to the lounger next to me. ‘That was the worst hotel I’ve ever inspected.’

  ‘Why, what’s happened, Helen?’ I try to sound concerned, but whatever it was that happened, it meant I could spend the day with Costas.

  ‘I’ll fill you in after I’ve ordered a drink. I thought we could try the buffet restaurant for tonight’s meal, if that’s okay with you?’

  ‘Yes, that sounds good to me. I’m looking forward to it,’ comes my reply. I’m trying not to sound too cheerful. I don’t want Helen finding out my little secret and giving me a lecture about how he shouldn’t be dating a hotel guest. Helen doesn’t like breaking rules especially the ones she’s probably written.

  We both order a drink. Helen has a large G & T and I have an Island Delight off the extensive cocktail list, which sounds quite appropriate for my day. I nearly let it slip a couple of times about my Afternoon Delight cocktail and my day with Costas. I’m really going to struggle to keep my little secret. I pick my book up and find my place, oh yes… ‘Perhaps it’s because love rarely shows up in the places that we expect it to, or looks the way we expect it to look…’ Blimey, that’s a coincidence. I certainly wasn’t expecting to fall for a Greek waiter.

  ‘What’s that you’re reading?’ Helen asks.

  ‘It’s called In the Meantime. Stella recommended it after she’d split with her hubby. You can borrow it when I’ve read it, if you want.’

  ‘Why would I want to borrow it? I’m in a relationship.’

  ‘Oh, yes, I forgot – James. Have you heard from him yet this week?’

  ‘Yes, actually he sent me a text this morning saying he was having problems with his phone.’

  ‘Problems with his phone… More like, problems with his memory. Have you sent him a thank you text for the champagne?’ I can’t resist winding Helen up and hearing what excuse she comes up with to protect James.

  ‘No, I haven’t. That could have been a mistake by the hotel.’

  ‘Okay, fair play, we’ll ask them.’

  ‘Oh, that’ll look good when they discover they’ve delivered an expensive bottle of champagne to the wrong room and we’ve drunk it. Anyway, have you done anything today apart from reading your book?’

  Oh dear. I’ve hit the nail on the head about James so we’re having an abrupt subject change. ‘I’ve been out exploring, actually. I went into town and I’ve got some photos for your brochure.’

  ‘Really? Let’s have a gander then.’

  I grab my camera and flick it on. Helen has a look through all my images.

  ‘Wow, Steph, these photos are really good. I love this one. What a beautiful little church.’

  ‘Yes, I even went in. There are no pews; it’s all really sweet and simple. I lit a candle.’

  ‘Oh my God. It’s a wonder you didn’t burn the place down, with your track record.’

  ‘For goodness sake, Helen, are you ever going to let that drop? It was twenty years ago.’

  ‘Ooh, don’t get your knickers in a twist, I’m only joking. Anyway, I’m impressed that you’ve taken so many photos in a day. Daniel will love this lot for the brochure and the website. They’re much better than James’s efforts.’

  ‘Well, let’s face it, he’s probably got much more important stuff on his agenda when he comes here.’

  ‘Right, come on, let’s get showered and changed. I don’t want another ear-bashing session about James. We’ll see what boyfriend material you find when you’re ready for dating again.’

  Usually Helen has the last word but today I just can’t resist getting a little jibe in. ‘Well, I hope for my sake they’re nothing like James.’

  * * *

  The room now has two single beds. I dump my bag down and head straight to the shower while Helen tries out her dirt machine, as I call it.

  ‘You’ll never believe the reading I got at the hotel this afternoon!’ I hear her shouting over the noise of the shower.

  ‘What was it?’ I shout back.

  ‘Ten thousand, nine hundred and eighty-two!’ comes the reply.

  ‘How much?’ I’ve stopped the shower because I can’t have heard her correctly.

  ‘Ten thousand, nine hundred and eighty-two. I couldn’t believe it myself so I’m trying it in here to check it isn’t faulty.’

  I restart the shower and watch around the shower curtain as Helen takes a swab from the toilet flush button and inserts it into her machine.

  ‘That’s more like it. Thirty-eight. I think it’s safe to say that this hotel is clean and this afternoon’s place was filthy. No surprises there. I’ve given them until the day before we leave to clean up, otherwise they’ll lose their gold status and their slot in next year’s brochure.’

  ‘Was it really that bad?’ I enquire, freshly emerged from the shower and wrapped in lovely soft towels.

  ‘Yep, worst I’ve ever seen. James will be getting a huge rollicking over it. I’ve seen another side to him today. A bone-bloody-idle side. The manager at that last hotel was absolutely bonkers. Why on earth James didn’t pull him up I’ll never know. And that Selena, at the hotel next door, looking all smug, thinking that James was coming along. I soon wiped the smile off her face when I told her he was in Florida.’

  Thank goodness. It sounds like Helen’s beginning to see what the real James is like. I wouldn’t be surprised if the double bed and champagne thing is something that he always requests; the hotel must have just assumed it was him coming with a guest, maybe even that Selena woman at the hotel next door. Or, oh my God, the guy from this afternoon’s place!

  While Helen’s in the shower, I’m going to attempt to read a bit more of my book. So far, I’ve only managed a few pages. Stella has put stars and lines all over the bits that she thought were relevant to her, which is the majority of it. The page I’m on is no exception. It’s about the thirteen most common things we do in search of love… Flipping heck, what a minefield. But I’m okay, I’m not in search of love … am I? My thoughts are disturbed by a knock on the door. Before I even manage to get t
o my feet, a woman is on her way in to the room.

  ‘Housekeeping, evening service,’ she announces.

  ‘Oh, sorry, my sister’s in the shower,’ I reply, all flustered. What on earth is evening service? This is a new one to me. Thank goodness I’ve got a bathrobe on.

  ‘No problem, madam. I come back when you go to dinner. I bring water and change your towels. I just change the sign on your door so you don’t get disturbed again.’

  ‘Okay, no problem, thank you.’

  Right, where was I? Oh yes, my book. I skim through the next few points and reach the last two.

  12. You don’t express what you really feel because you believe it will hurt your partner’s feelings.

  Well, at least Richard and I were honest with each other. He could have given in and agreed to start a family and then regretted it and left me anyway. At least, this way, I’m still young enough to meet someone and hopefully fulfil my dream of having a family.

  13. You choose to believe your partner’s lies even when you know the truth. You act like you don’t know what’s going on when you do.

  This is Helen. I don’t think James is necessarily lying outright. I think it’s that he’s got different ideas about their relationship and that Helen hasn’t made her thoughts about it clear to him. For him, it’s casual, but I think Helen might finally be ready for a bit more commitment…

  For goodness sake, there’s another bloody knock on the door. I wait for it to open but it doesn’t. There’s another knock and a faint, muffled shout. ‘Room service.’

  I get up again and open the door.

  ‘Evening, madam. You ordered some ice,’ says the waiter.

  ‘Ice – lovely, bring it in. My sister must have ordered it. Just pop it down.’

  ‘Have a nice evening,’ he says on his way out.

  ‘Thank you, I’m sure we will,’ I reply. I’m going to make use of the ice to have a Bacardi and coke out of the minibar while I start getting ready. I’m giving up on the book for today. All that love psychology is making my head hurt.

  Helen has emerged from the shower. ‘Has the ice arrived?’ she asks, peering round the bathroom door.

  ‘Yes, it’s here, and the housekeeping evening service is coming back when we’ve gone to dinner.’

  ‘Good stuff. Would you mind making me a G & T? Then let’s go straight to the dining room, if that’s okay with you.’

  ‘No problem, I’m easy. Maybe we can sit outside. I think there’s some entertainment on.’ I’m not going to disclose my ulterior motive, which is that I want to swoon over Costas all night.

  ‘Yes, that’s fine with me. In fact, that means I can observe the outdoor restaurant staff so that’ll be another area covered.’ She disappears back into the bathroom. ‘By the way, how are you getting on with the questionnaire?’ she shouts through to me.

  ‘Oh, not bad. I’m sure I’ll get in the swing of it by tomorrow. Like you said, everything is running very smoothly.’ Good job she can’t see me. She’d instantly know I’m being economical with the truth.

  ‘Unlike this afternoon’s Greek Fawlty Towers fiasco. You can put some music on, if you want, off my phone. There’s all sorts on there.’

  ‘Okay, will do.’ Thank goodness she’s not asked to see what I’ve done so far because I don’t think she’d be very impressed with it.

  I select random play and ‘Girls Just Want to Have Fun’ comes on. Helen appears from the bathroom with a towel tied neatly around her head.

  ‘Oh my God, Steph, this takes me back to when we were teenagers! Do you remember standing in front of the mirror with our hairbrush microphones, singing along to our music and Dad yelling, “Will you turn that racket down? We’ll have the neighbours complaining!”’

  ‘Oh yes, I remember. They knocked on the wall once and he went mad. Then there was that “Saturday Night” song, when we did the actions and the light fittings in the lounge shook as we jumped around. We got the blame for the crack that appeared on the ceiling!’ The thought of it makes us giggle together like teenagers again.

  We carry on getting ready together, applying make-up and attempting to dry our hair with the rather pathetic bathroom hairdryer. Luckily, Helen’s Glamour Jumbo Tong saves the day – apparently every girl should have one. She wants a wave in her straight blonde hair and gets herself in a right strop with it.

  ‘Why can’t my hair be wavy like yours?’ she says in frustration.

  ‘I don’t know. Why can’t I be a couple of inches taller like you?’

  ‘Yes, that’s all well and good but when I wear heels I tower above everyone.’

  ‘Oh yes, those bloody shoes. Do you think you can put them away tonight? I stubbed my toe on them this morning. You’re a bloody nightmare for leaving stuff out. Didn’t you learn your lesson when Grandma tripped over one of your shoes and broke her wrist?’

  ‘More like sprained her wrist, if I remember correctly.’

  ‘Whatever. If you’re wearing your dress, I’ll wear my white cropped linen trousers with the blue and white striped top and those precarious wedges.’

  ‘I did warn you about those wedges, but you wouldn’t listen.’

  ‘Yes, well, they’re the only heels I’ve brought and I don’t want you towering over me.’

  Helen giggles. ‘You look like you’re going on a boat, with your white and blue stripes.’

  ‘Oh, very bloody funny. If you cast your mind back a couple of weeks to when I was clothes-shopping for my holiday, you’ll remember that I was going on a cruise and this outfit seemed very relevant.’

  ‘Oops, sorry. Well, in any case, it flatters your figure. You look stunning.’

  ‘Oh, thanks, sis. You look lovely too. Ooh, I nearly forgot. I bought you a little pressie in town.’ I retrieve the gift bag and hand Helen the beautifully wrapped necklace. She carefully unwraps it.

  ‘Steph, this is absolutely gorgeous! It goes perfectly with this dress. Funnily enough, the necklace James bought me for my birthday broke this morning.’

  ‘How strange. I must have picked up on your vibes. Well, put it on. Let’s see.’ I fasten it for her. It complements her dress beautifully. ‘And I treated myself as well.’

  ‘Come on, open it. Let’s see it.’

  I carefully unwrap my necklace. I’m still delighted with it.

  ‘Oh, that’s pretty! Look at all those colours. We’ll have to go back to the shop. I could do loads of gift shopping there.’

  ‘Yes, me too. The best bit of all is it’s called “Amnēsia”.’

  We chuckle and apply finishing touches to our make-up, spray on some perfume, choose our bags and then we’re ready. For some reason, I’m quite nervous and have butterflies in my stomach. In fact, unusually, I don’t actually feel that hungry. I remember my phone at the last minute and shove it in my bag.

  We totter down to the restaurant where Elena is waiting to efficiently take us to our table. We go through the inside, outside, smoking, non-smoking options, which I can see Helen is impressed with, and then Elena leads us outside. Tonight’s entertainment will include a couple of singers; Elena offers us a table just slightly away from the speakers, which seems like a good idea to us. She informs us that our waitress tonight is Elora.

  A few minutes later, Elora arrives with a couple of interesting-looking cocktails. ‘These are for you with the compliments of the restaurant manager, to make up for the incident this morning. This one is called Tomorrow We Sail – for you, madam. And for you, madam, a Cosmopolitan. Please enjoy and help yourselves to the buffet when you are ready. Let me know if you would like any wine or water.’

  Elora is gone before Helen can quiz her, but I don’t get off the hook that easily. ‘What’s this incident she’s talking about?’

  I need to act and look calm otherwise she’ll pounce on me immediately. ‘Oh, it was nothing,’ I rep
ly.

  ‘It must have been something, Steph, otherwise they wouldn’t have sent over two complimentary cocktails. Now, are you going to tell me or have I got to summon the manager over here and ask him instead?’

  She’s got that bossy-big-sister aura about her. I’m not going to be able to wriggle out of it so I offer her my watered-down explanation. ‘Oh, I knocked a jug of milk out of a waiter’s hands and it splashed on my new dress. There was no harm done.’

  Of course, Helen’s not entirely happy with my version of events. She digs a bit further. She’s like a dog with a bone. ‘It all sounds a bit odd to me. Your cocktail was quite apt, though. Maybe he spotted you in your sailor outfit. Anyway, if it was your fault, why have they sent us complimentary cocktails?’

  ‘I don’t know, Helen – good customer service?’ I shrug my shoulders.

  ‘Fair enough.’ Ooh, that was close. She’s finally let it drop. ‘Now, shall we get some food? I’m feeling a bit peckish.’

  We head towards the buffet. Costas catches my eye and winks as we go inside. I’m wondering what the hell Tomorrow We Sail is. I’ve never heard of it, and he’s lucky that CID Helen Collins hasn’t picked up on it either. Maybe it is just because I look like a sailor.

  I’m back with my food from the buffet and I’m just about to start eating when I feel my phone vibrating. I quickly have a peep before Helen gets back with her rather boring-looking plate of steamed fish and vegetables.

  Change of plan. Tomorrow

  we go in boat if OK with u.

  Meet outside church at 12.

  Bring swimwear and towel.

  I bring food. xx

  I quickly text back, realising the Tomorrow We Sail cocktail was a cryptic clue. My head has registered the boat scenario and is wondering if I’ll be able to go through with it. My heart overrules it, and I’m already tapping out a reply.

  OK, sounds great. x