Edge of Desire

by Jessica Marin

  “I think you have always known I had a crush on you when we were growing up, but do you know when I actually realized I loved you? It was when our families were on vacation in Santorini when we were kids. You walked in on me putting on my bathing suit.” I start to laugh at the memory of how horrified I was that he just barged right into my room without even knocking, something that he still does to this day. “You just continued staring at me while I was trying to cover myself up. Finally, you looked at me and said those were the smallest mosquito bites you had ever seen in your life and turned around and left! I already had a complex about how everyone in my class had boobs but me, so I couldn’t believe you said that to me.” I shake my head at the memory since he really was a piece of shit that day for saying that. “The look on your face when I called you the ugliest wanker on the planet was priceless, but it was how you looked at me later on that evening, when you came to apologize, is what did me in. Those gorgeous eyes of yours had remorse and sympathy. When you told me you were sorry and then held me as I struggled not to cry… I knew it was your arms I wanted to be in forever.”

  I want him to wake up and laugh with me at this memory, and all the memories I have of us from childhood. Anger starts to rise up, making me livid that he hasn’t woken yet. He is strong and young, he should be awake by now.

  “Wake up, Sean! Wake the fuck up! How dare you come back into my life after I thought I finally got over you and make me fall in love with you again! How dare you try to leave me this way! Do you know that you are making Cal cry? Cal! The man with the scary, hot intense face. He’s out there crying for you. We all need you to wake up! Avery is going to be so angry with you if her Uncle Sean doesn’t wake up. Wake up!“ I scream, not caring if everyone outside these walls hears me yelling at him. “I will not accept this from you! You are a fighter and have so much to live for. Stop hiding in there and wake up!” I yell in anger, tears running down my cheeks. I start pushing at him, hoping for some sort of reflex, hoping that the movement will jolt him awake.

  Hoping for a miracle.

  When I keep pushing and pushing at him and nothing happens, my hope turns into despair as I throw myself down on the bed, clutching his arm, my sobs shaking my body to my core. I grip his hand in mine, my cheek resting on top of it and close my eyes, savoring the memories that are on replay in my mind.

  Visions of us as children together.

  Visions of us as adults, seeing each other for the very first time in Vancouver after all those years. I still can feel the jolt of electricity when his eyes met mine, recognizing who he was seeing, liking what he saw.

  Visions of him kissing me for the first time, the way his face looked as his lips slowly descended upon mine.

  Visions of him when he was deep inside of me, the look of ecstasy on his face when he came.

  I don’t feel my tears being brushed away from cheek at first, too numb from my pain to feel anything than what the memories are making me feel right now.

  But then I notice it.

  I feel the flicker of his finger.

  I bolt up and stare at his hand, his finger, at a snail’s pace, waving at me. I inhale my breath as my eyes slowly travel to his chest, seeing it rise up and down, faster than it was before. My gaze continues up to his face and for a moment, nothing happens, making me wonder if I am now delusional with my grief.

  But then his eyelids move, and I see a tiny sliver of those beautiful green eyes.

  “Nurse!” I start screaming and run from my chair to open the door. “He’s awake!” I yell out to the hallway and run back into the room and grab his hand, not waiting to see if anyone else is coming.

  “Sean, Sean… can you hear me? Blink if you can hear me!” He slowly blinks and I exhale out in relief, thanking God numerous times that my love is going to be okay. I place my forehead on his chest and cry happy tears of joy that this is not going to be his ending— or ours. I move out of the way when the nurse comes rushing in and start quickly checking his vitals. Cal, Jenna, Robert and Kellan come in after, congregating at the foot of the bed, hope shining brightly from their tear soaked eyes.

  “I’m going to go get the doctor to check him out,” the nurse says to us and leaves the room.

  Sean turns over his hand, his palm facing up for me to place my hand in. I grab his hand and bring it up to my lips, showering it with kisses of love. He starts to take off his oxygen mask in order for him to talk.

  “Sean, don’t do that just yet,” I chide as I stand up to put the mask back on. He shakes his head no at me and motions for me to come closer so he can whisper in my ear. I lean in close so he doesn’t have to strain his voice.

  “I want your mosquito bites to be mine forever,” he says, his voice hoarse from not being in use. I burst out laughing, fresh tears coming down my face as I softly kiss his lips. A lone tear slides out of his right eye and I wipe it away with my thumb, caressing his cheek with love.

  “I love you, Isla. You’re never allowed to leave me again,” he says in a raspy voice and I nod my head at him, words not needed since he can see my love and adoration for him shining through my eyes.

  The doctor comes in and I move out of the way, taking that opportunity to hug Cal, Jenna, Robert and Kellan. Once we bear hug it out, we all look back over at Sean as the doctor examines him, telling him what his road to recovery will look like. We all can’t contain our smiles of gratitude that Sean is going to be okay.

  Epilogue

  Sean

  Eight Months Later

  I sit back in the lounge chair and prop my hands behind my head, sighing in contentment as I smell the salt in the air from the ocean and admire the view that is before me. Most people sit on the beaches of St. Lucia and are mesmerized by the crystal clear ocean of the Caribbean. I, on the other hand, am mesmerized by something else in the ocean.

  Or should I say, someone in that ocean.

  I am mesmerized by the woman who taught me what true love feels like.

  I am mesmerized by the woman who is my fucking everything.

  I am mesmerized by the woman who I can’t live a single day without.

  After the incident with Cora, Isla and I went back to Ireland for two weeks where she nursed me back to health from the poisoning. We rejoined Cal and Jenna in the United States for the remainder of the press tour, a tour that Cora was no longer invited to be on. The studio sent out a press release saying she was unable to attend the premieres in New York and Los Angeles due to personal reasons.

  Two weeks later, it was all over the news that Cora Gregory had married Prince Khalid Rashid al-Hamad in a private ceremony in the south of France. I have no doubt in my mind that Cora did it for the money, but maybe she also did it so she wouldn’t feel so alone. Whatever her reasons may be, I only hope that she is finally at peace and happy. I have forgiven Cora for her wrong doings, but I will never forget how she almost destroyed my life.

  “You look like you are drunk with that ridiculous smile on your face,” Robert says as he hands me a beer and sits down next to me. All of us have came to St. Lucia for Layla and Chase’s wedding. The beautiful, emotional ceremony was held yesterday at sundown and today we are all recovering, enjoying our last day in paradise before we go back home.

  “I am drunk… drunk on love, Robert.” I laugh as he rolls his eyes at me and looks out at my view. Kellan has joined Isla in the water and we watch the two of them laugh at something he says to her.

  “You sure are and it looks damn good on you, Sean. I’m truly happy for the both of you.” He leans over and gives my leg a hard slap. “So when are you going to make her an honest woman?”

  “As soon as you marry Kellan.” I raise my eyebrows in a challenge, wondering when those two are going to make it officially legal themselves.

  “Ooh, a dual wedding! That sounds like fun, although Kellan might not like the attention taken away from him.” He looks like he is seriously pondering the idea and I immediately regret my words.

  “Rewind and
forget what I just said to you. Her engagement ring is back home in my safe and I plan on proposing at the opening ceremony of her new school.”

  Isla quit her job as nanny to the Harrington’s six months ago, moved in with me, and focused on her dream of opening her own boarding school. With my help and some other celebrity investors that I put her in contact with, the construction of the school will be breaking ground shortly.

  “You’re going to wait two years to propose?” He looks at me in disbelief and then shakes his head when I give him a questioning look, confused as to what he’s talking about. “Did you not pay any attention at the architects meeting when they said it will be a two-year project?” I shake my head no as I recollect that my attention was focused solely on my girlfriend and how hot she looked talking to the architects about the functionality of the school. My mind completely wondered from the topic of conversation to daydreaming of bending her over that desk and taking her from behind.

  “Hell no, I’m not waiting two years to get engaged!” I growl and contemplate what it would take to maybe get engaged next weekend.

  “Did someone say they’re getting engaged?” Jenna’s voice drifts over as she and Layla walk toward us with drinks in their hands. Layla is sipping a Pina Colada while Jenna is drinking sparkling water because Cal, once again, has gotten her pregnant. I look behind them to see that Cal and Chase are still standing at the bar, probably talking about business since Cal’s an investor in Chase’s family business.

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I respond, an innocent look on my face as I try to play naive. Jenna is going to expect details of how I plan to propose to Isla and quite frankly, I want to keep that a surprise.

  “Oh c’mon, Sean! Don’t keep me in suspense! I can help you plan,” she whines, an evil smile spreading on my face as karma is a bitch and I am getting her back for not telling me about their surprise wedding.

  “Sucks to be left in the dark, doesn’t it?” I laugh as she throws an ice cube at me. My phone suddenly rings in the cupholder of my chair. I look to see it is an international number that I don’t recognize. Since I’m waiting to hear from a director on a new movie role that I have been wanting, I decide to answer the call and walk away from the group to have some privacy.

  “Hello?” I answer and when the line stays silent, I say it one more time, prepared to hang up when a voice cuts through, barely audible.

  “Sean? Sean! It’s me, Sean. Please don’t hang up on me! I know you don’t want to hear from me, but I really need your help!” I stiffen at a voice that I never wanted to hear from again.

  Cora.

  “How the hell did you get my phone number?” I growl, as I move a little bit farther so no one can hear me.

  “Sean, please! You’ve got to listen to me since I only have a minute to talk. I need you, Sean! I need you to get me out of here. Khalid forces me to do some very bad things, Sean. Things that are going to scar me for life. I am in living hell, Sean! You’ve got to get me out of here!” She pleads and for once, I feel nothing toward her. While I hope what she’s saying is not true, her words have zero credibility since she has cried wolf one too many times. I will not risk loosing Isla to help Cora ever again.

  “You’re an addict and a liar, Cora. You’re not my problem anymore. In fact, you’re dead to me. Don’t ever call me again.” My voice is deadly calm as I hang up on her and immediately block the number that she just used to call me. I send my assistant a quick text, warning her that I plan on changing my phone number, again, as soon as I get back home. I shut off my phone for the remainder of the day, refusing to let her tarnish my mood.

  I make my way back to my chair, noticing that Cal and Chase have finally joined us. As I sit back down, Kellan and Isla decide to come out of the ocean. I stare at her as I watch her emerge, looking like a wet goddess. As if she knows exactly what I’m thinking, she gives me a playful smile before plopping her wet body down onto mine. I kiss her soundly on the lips and whisper I love you while staring directly into her eyes. She cradles my face in between her hands, her eyes baring right into me. “Are you okay?” she asks, her eyes narrowing in concern.

  Avery’s scream of laughter catches my attention as her new nanny brings her and Brooks back to Jenna and Cal from making sand castles. I can’t stop my gaze from looking at each and every single person in this group, noting how happy everyone is, how much we all support each other in good times and in bad. But most of all, how we love each other wholeheartedly and without judgment. These are my people, my family, my tribe.

  I look back at Isla and smile into her searching eyes. “I’m the happiest I have ever been in my whole entire life.”

  And I am.

  Because I’m home.

  Also by Jessica Marin

  The Let Me In Series

  Heartbreak Warfare (Let Me In, Book 1)

  Perfectly Lonely (Let Me In, Book 2)

  Edge of Desire (Let Me In, Book 3)

  Standalone Novels

  Until Valerie: Happily Ever Alpha World

  Love At The Bluebird

  (co-written with Aurora Rose Reynolds)

  Bear Creek Rodeo

  The Irish Cowboy

  The Celtic Cowboy

  The Kelowna Lynxes Hockey Club Series

  Yearn For You (Coming Soon)

  Acknowledgments

  Hi Friends! Hard to believe that this is the end to the Let Me In series… or is it? (insert evil laughter).

  In all seriousness, I truly hope you feel I did all of these characters justice, especially Sean, since this was an emotional rollercoaster ride of a story for him.

  Just because this may be the end of the series, doesn’t mean you won’t see your favorite Let Me In series characters in future series.

  I want to thank you, the readers, and the bloggers, for your positive feedback, love and support. Especially to the bloggers, who work long hours to help advertise and support us authors.

  Thank you to my family and friends, especially my husband and children. Without their support, I wouldn’t be able to continue living my dream.

  Thank you to the team of people who helped make Edge of Desire happen.

  Thank you to my Misfits for your continued support and promotion of my books!

  Please make sure you follow me on all of my social media pages and sign up for my newsletter at authorjessicamarin.com to be up to date with upcoming releases and book signings.

  Peace and love,

  Jessica

  About the Author

  Jessica Marin began her love affair with books at a young age from the encouragement of her Grandma Shirley. She has always dreamed of being an author and finally made her dreams of writing happily ever after stories a reality. She currently resides in Tennessee with her husband, children and fur babies.

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