The Battle
Page 8
QUAZAR NOTE: WHEN IN DOUBT TURN IT OFF!
“Does this mean the slime from Dimension F Minus can’t come here anymore?” Zeke asked.
Don turned to me. “Adam, please smash the control panel.”
“With pleasure!” I said.
I jumped up on top of the panel. I spun downwards with all my strength. The panel crumpled down to the width of a piece of paper. I grinned.
“Yep, now that means no more visits from the slime.”
“Oh bummer, I kind of miss them,” Zeke said.
We all looked at Zeke.
He shrugged. “Ya gotta admit they were interesting…”
Chapter 13
Not Your Normal Conversation
After the battle, I sat down in the conference room and talked with Lia. It felt great to be able to talk with another superhero. Lia has been in the superhero business longer than I have, so she really knows the ins and the outs.
And of course, Zeke was there too. When your best bud is a zombie, he tends to hang around you a lot. Zombies have a hard time making friends with normal people. I think it’s because normal people always worry Zeke will eat their brains. He doesn’t help the situation by licking his lips so often. Plus, he often mumbles, “brains, yummy….”
“How’s the superhero biz going?” Lia asked.
I smiled. “It’s fun. I already have an arch super-rival,” I boasted, though I’m not really sure why I should have been so proud of that.
Lia looked at me in surprise and beamed. She gave me a little nudge on the arm. “Really? Really?”
I nodded. “Yep, Doctor E. Vile,” I said. “He wants to destroy me and everyone I love.”
Lia shook her head. “Man, you are so lucky. The closest I’ve come to an arch-rival is your ex-girlfriend, Wendi. She’s mean, but she’s certainly not super. I mean, a whiff of my little toe would put her down her for a week.”
Zeke joined in. “Ya know, Future Now is working on a super serum that Wendy could drink so she can become a super being! At least for a while. Then your rival will be super. At least for a while.”
Lia patiently listened to what Zeke had to say. “Yes, not sure I really want Wendi to do be super.”
“But then she would be a good challenge for you,” Zeke offered. “You know what they say, a good superhero is only as good as her arch rival!”
“Who says that?” I asked.
Zeke shrugged. “I just said that.” He nudged me. “Come on buddy, pay attention. You won’t impress the pretty girl by being dumb.” Zeke turned to Lia. “Unless you like dumb guys. Do you?”
Lia shook her head. “Nope. I like my guys to be intelligent.” Lia paused for a moment. She locked eyes on Zeke and commanded. “Zeke, leave us alone for a few minutes.”
Zeke looked at her. He turned to me. “Hey, was that her super command voice you told me about?”
“I believe so,” I said.
Zeke turned back to Lia. He pointed to his head. “That won’t work on this brain. My brain doesn’t work right,” he said, crossing his eyes. “Makes me hard to control. In fact, I don’t think I can be controlled.”
“Can you be melted by intense heat vision?” Lia asked, leaning into Zeke.
Zeke looked up at the ceiling in deep thought. He looked at Lia. “Yes, I bet I can.”
Lia tapped the table a few times.
“What’s it to ya?” Zeke asked.
Lia jumped to her feet and stared at Zeke. “Do you know, I can generate heat as hot as the sun?”
Zeke shook his head. “Nope. But there are a lot of things I don’t know. For example, who turns off the light in the fridge when you shut the door? Does the light really go out when you shut the door? Does bubblegum really lose its flavor on the bedpost at night? Do butterflies like butter? Why does butter attract flies? Is man good or evil?”
Lia leaned into Zeke. “My point being, I can melt you with a glare!”
Zeke stood there wide-eyed. “I get that. Yep. But you’re a good guy, I mean girl. You don’t kill things.”
Lia raised her eyebrows, “But you’re undead. Therefore….”
Zeke lifted a finger. “I’ve done the math. I have computed that you want to be alone with my good buddy!” He stood up and slapped me on the back. He patted me on the head. He pointed to the door. “I’ll be waiting outside.” He started walking towards the door. He stopped. “That is what all this means. Right?”
“Yes!” Lia said.
QUAZAR NOTE: DON’T MESS WITH LIA!
Zeke lumbered out of the room as quickly as he could.
“I know he’s a little different, but he is literally brain dead,” I said. “Plus, he is loyal and a lot of fun.”
“No need to defend him. I realize he’s a good friend,” Lia said, sitting back down in her chair. “I just wanted to talk alone a bit.” She put her hand on my shoulder and looked me in the eyes. “How is your new family? I mean, I think the Opals are wonderful people but I don’t see them very often.”
“Lia, your thoughts are totally correct. The Opals are wonderful people. Even though I’ve only known them for a short time, I feel like I am a part of their family. I can’t imagine my life without them!”
“That’s so great!” Lia said.
“That’s what makes me so mad about this Doctor E. Vile. He threatened them.” I made two fists. “Nobody threatens my family.” My fists caught fire.
Lia blew a puff of cold air onto my fists, putting the fire out.
“Sorry,” I said.
Lia kept looking into my eyes and said, “Never apologize for your passion or for protecting your loved ones.”
“That is my passion,” I said.
“So sweet,” Lia said.
She leaned in towards me. Of course, at that moment Zeke burst in through the door. I mean he ran right through the door.
“Dude!” Zeke shouted. “Doctor E. Vile is heading towards town on top of a giant 100-foot-tall robot.”
I pulled away from Lia. It was such bad timing! “Sorry, Lia, but I have to get this guy,”
Lia nodded. “I understand.” She paused. “You want me to back you up?”
“No,” I said. “I need to do this myself. But if he somehow beats me, I need you to make sure my family is safe.”
“Oh, I will,” Lia said.
“I will too!” Zeke said.
I spun into my Quazar costume. I flew off.
QUAZAR NOTE: ARCH RIVALS CAN BE A PAIN IN THE BUTT!
Chapter 14
Not Your Normal Confrontation
I zoomed out of the lab and towards the outskirts of town. I was motivated and ready to take Doctor E. Vile out once and for all.
Even hundreds of yards away, I could see Doctor E. Vile’s, giant robot lumbering towards town, squishing any trees or buildings in its way. The robot looked like a giant mechanical wooden soldier. Doctor E. Vile stood in a small dome on top of the soldier’s head. He moved his arms and legs to control the gigantic bot.
“Come out and face me like a man, Quazar boy!” Doctor E. Vile’s voice boomed over the robot’s speaker system.
As I flew in closer, the not good doctor spotted me. The robot tipped back its head. Two fiery missiles launched from its mechanical nostrils.
“Let’s see how you handle the boogers of death!” Doctor E. Vile shouted.
QUAZAR NOTE: BOOGERS OF DEATH ARE JUST PLAIN WRONG!!
The fiery booger missiles flew at me. They split into four, then eight, then sixteen, then you get the idea…a LOT of fiery booger missiles pelted towards me.
I dove under the barrage of fireball missiles. They whizzed past me. I kept flying towards Doctor E. Vile. I heard a zip. The sound of the booger missiles grew louder. Turning my head, I noticed the fiery boogers had changed course and were headed right for me.
I changed direction at super speed and crashed to the ground face first. I made a big dent in the surface of the ground. My head hurt. I tasted dirt. Looking up, I saw a giant robot foot looming above me. I
super rolled to the side. The robot foot came crashing down, just barely missing me. The robot lifted its other massive foot. I spit out the dirt in my mouth. The bot’s foot came smashing down towards me. I reached out with my arms, catching the foot. The foot pushed down. I pushed back upwards. I felt the pressure from the giant mechanical bot.
“Give up, boy! Just let me squash you like the bug you are!” Doctor Vile cried from above.
The pressure increased. I held my ground.
“Once I squash you, I will take down this town, piece by piece. They never gave me the respect I deserve. Now I will give them the squishing they deserve!” Vile screamed.
The robotic leg continued to thrust down on me. My head started dripping with sweat. I could taste the salt of my sweat in my mouth; not a pleasant taste.
Then I remembered a YouTube video I’d seen when studying for school. It was about the way water can generate electricity when mixed with salt. The process was fairly complicated and really sciency, but I like science. Plus, I was a really complicated kid. My body had nano-chips in it. Now I was making water and salt with my sweat. I bet I could use that with the chip to generate a massive electric shock.
QUAZAR NOTE: YOUTUBE FOR THE WIN!
I dropped down to my knees while still pressing upwards with my arms.
“Ha, Quazar with a Z. You are not only a poor speller but you are too weak for my amazing technology.”
I groaned. “I spell it with a Z because it’s cool. Also, I think in the comic books there is a female hero named Quasar with an S. And I don’t want people to be confused by not knowing if I am a him or a her. Truthfully though, I’m not completely sure of the spelling, but it’s better to be safe.”
“How noble!” Doctor E. Vile taunted. “For a squished bug!”
I felt the pressure on top of me increase. I cleared my mind of all thoughts. Well, not all thoughts, I couldn’t do that. I’m not Zeke. But I concentrated on generating electricity…channeling the natural energy from my body and combining it with the water and salt from my sweat and then magnifying that with my nano-chip. My body tingled and rippled with energy. My fingers, pushing the giant boot off me, crackled and pulsated with white popping energy. The energy went shooting up through the robot’s legs, then stomach, then arms, then neck, then head, then into the dome where Doctor Vile was sitting.
The robot started to shake, tremble and surge.
“It’s going to blow up!” one of the many bystanders who had been watching shouted.
I didn’t doubt the warning. The robot started to tilt backward. Moving at max super Q-speed, I raced up the side of the robot to the dome where Doctor E Vile sat. I burst through the dome. Vile sat in his seat, his eyes bulging. He was being bombarded with electricity. It served him right.
QUAZAR NOTE: BAD GUYS GET WHAT THEY DESERVE!
I shot forward and pulled him out of his seat. I flew to the back of the sparking, trembling giant robot. I zoomed down to its giant butt. I kicked it into the air with a massive super Q-butt kick. The bot went soaring into space. It blew up in a big red ball of fire.
Little bits of robot rained down on us like confetti.
“Looks like your reign of terror is ruined,” I told Doctor E Vile.
“Goo Goo. Bottom. Top. Buttface,” he stuttered. His eyes looked empty.
I dropped him off at the police station. My work there was done.
Chapter 15
Actually Normal and Loving It
That night, I stayed at home with my family recapping the day’s events. We sat around the table eating pork chops.
QUAZAR NOTE: MY FAMILY REALLY LIKES PORK CHOPS.
Jeanie walked up and placed a bowl of salad down on the table. She patted me and Ellie Mae on our backs. She stood back and smiled, “I’m so proud of you two!” she said. “It’s not every day that a mom gets to see her kids foil an invasion of Earth from giant slimes.”
“Thanks!” I said.
“Just doing my job,” Ellie Mae said. For a nine-year-old, she is way mature.
Don looked at me. “Plus, Adam…you got to defeat your arch rival and also save the town.”
I grinned. “It has been a busy day.”
“I’ll say,” Zeke said.
Oh yeah, Zeke joined us for dinner. Zeke loved eating the pork chop bones. Ellie Mae said it was like having a pet. A big green, smelly pet. Zeke took that as a compliment. Ya gotta love Zeke.
“Do you think we’ve heard the last of the slimes from Dimension F Minus?” Ellie Mae asked.
“I hope so,” Jeanie said. “They were nasty.”
“Actually, the blue and yellow ones seemed kind of nice,” I said. “I also think the red ones thought they were just defending their dimension from us. I hope we might be able to work out some sort of truce with them in the future.”
QUAZAR NOTE: SOME BAD SLIMES MIGHT NOT MEAN THEY ARE ALL BAD.
Don and Jeanie smiled at me. “That’s our Adam, always looking for the best in people; and in slimes.”
“How’s Vile doing?” I asked.
Don looked at his watch. “He’s in the Future Now secure medical wing getting the best attention. He still only talks gibberish. But really, his personality is better than ever. At least he is smiling and not threatening to destroy everything. He used to be a real problem in that way!”
The kitchen TV lowered down from the ceiling onto the table.
“TV, why are you down?” Jeanie asked. “No TV during dinner.”
“A news report is on,” the TV said. “A huge gorilla is heading towards Capital City. It is leaving a trail of stinky poop in its wake. I thought you should know.” The TV screen showed what had to be the biggest gorilla ever, heading towards the metropolis of Capital City.
“The Army and Super Teen are on the way. They can probably handle it. But I thought Adam might like to help!” the TV noted.
Don and Jeanie looked at me. “You’ve had a really busy day,” Don said.
“I’m sure Super Teen and the army can cope,” Jeanie said.
“Dude, you like the girl. Think how cool it would be taking down Mega King Kong alongside her!” Zeke said.
Ellie Mae smirked. “I can’t believe it, but I agree with the zombie.”
I stood up from the table. I looked at Don and Jeanie. “Do you guys mind?”
They both shook their heads. “No, we know you have to be you!”
I spun into my suit. “I’ll be back for dessert!” I said.
“Go save the world, son,” Jeanie told me.
I darted up into the air. I didn’t know what felt best, going to save the world or being called son. Yeah, I guess I did. Saving the world is great, but nothing beats being part of a family!
QUAZAR NOTE: TO BE CONTINUED!
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About The Authors:
John Zakour is a humor / SF / fantasy writer with a Master's degree in Human Behavior. He has written thousands of gags for syndicated comics, comedians and TV shows (including Simpsons and Rugrats, and Joan River's old TV show.)
John has been a contributor to Nickelodeon magazine writing Fairly Odd Parents, Rugrats and Jimmy Neutron comic books. John currently writes Bart Simpsons comics for Bongo comics.
In the 80’s and 90’s, John was a computer programmer and web guru for Cornell University and was also an EMT and judo instructor. John currently lives in upstate NY with his wife, a professor at Cornell University. The two of them have one son, a student at Cornell. For exercise, John plays softball, is a competitive pickleball player and javelin thrower, and still hits his punching bag daily. To relax, John likes to play World of Warcraft, watch TV and do Tai Chi.
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Katrina Kahler is the bestselling author of Julia Jones Diary, Twins, Mind Reader, The Secret, Angel, Diary of a Horse Mad Girl and Julia Jones the Teenage Years.
She lives in the beautiful coastal town of Noosa in Australia and has 2 grown-up children. Check out her other books at
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