Crazy Cupid Love
Page 34
Eliza felt a pang of empathy for the woman. Love was hard and weird and usually uncomfortable. She pulled out a new client folder. “Is there someone in particular you’re interested in?” she asked.
Agent Smith looked up, her expression brightening. “A woman I went to college with. We were friends then, but we lost touch. A few years ago, I ran into her at my vet’s office. She was more beautiful than I’d remembered, and we hit it off like no time had passed. We’ve been in touch off and on since then, and I can’t get her out of my mind. No matter how hard I try. Everything about her is so vibrant. You should see how adorable she is when she talks about her pet pig. It’s like something out of a movie.”
“Pig?” Eliza asked.
She nodded. “That pig is the luckiest bastard alive. If Yolanda Durst looked at me like she looked at him, I’d never want another thing in my life.”
Nearly six months post-enchantment, they were still going strong.
Even Mrs. Washmoore was there, with a present in one hand and—holy Hades—Old Man Vannerson holding the other.
“Is that…” Eliza whispered.
“They met in a Pat Benatar fan club or something,” Jake said.
“Enchantment? Non-enchantment? Is it serious or just a friends-with-benefits situation?”
Jake shuddered. “I’ve tried not to ask too many questions.”
Too bad for him. The librarian-bouncer-Fury had become like a surrogate great-aunt to Eliza, and she couldn’t wait to hear all about their Love story. “Well, as soon as this party is over, I’m hunting down Aunt Rebecca and asking all the questions.”
Jake laughed and wrapped his arms around her waist. “Happy birthday, Eliza.”
“Best one yet.” She rose up on her tiptoes and kissed him. Short enough for public consumption, but long enough to tell him how much she appreciated him—and what she wanted to do later to show it.
When they broke apart, he stepped back and ran a hand over the top of his head. “There’s your present. From me, I mean.”
She followed his gaze to the cedar tree where she’d had her first disastrous love-casting experience twenty-two years ago. Another donkey piñata hung from the branches.
“It was the only one I could find that wasn’t Valentine’s Day themed,” he whispered.
“A piñata? Really? Did my brother put you up to this?”
Elijah put a baseball bat in her hand and gave her a shove toward the tree. “It’s time to face your fears, Sis.”
“You knew about this?”
Her brother crossed his arms. “Innocent until proven guilty.”
Eliza paused beneath the piñata. After all these years, the thought of taking a swing still made her a little queasy. But as she looked around the yard at all the smiling faces, she knew: if ever there was a time to face her fears, this was it.
“What, no blindfold?” she joked. “No one’s going to spin me around until I puke?”
“Baby steps, Herman.” Jake took the bat in one hand, wrapped his free arm around her waist, and pulled her in for another kiss. The birthday crowd broke out in hoots and whistles behind them. She wanted to stay in that kiss forever, until they were old and wrinkled and covered in liver spots. But eventually Jake pulled away.
“What was that for?” she asked.
“Luck.” He put the bat in her hands and stepped away.
Eliza raised it over her shoulder like she was about to swing for a home run. Or, at least, how she thought she might swing for a home run if she’d ever played baseball.
Bat at the ready, she took one last look at the crowd. Her parents had joined and watched with their arms wrapped around each other. Elijah stood beside them, smirking, and Jake hung off to the side looking both proud and deeply terrified.
Her brother cupped his hands around his mouth. “Swing already. I’ve got places to be.”
“Like where?”
“Your friend Quinn promised me a birthday drink.”
Oh gods.
She swung.
The bat cracked the donkey wide open, and a single item fell from its insides.
A box.
A very small silver box.
A size-of-a-ring-box box.
Eliza’s pulse took off at a wild sprint. This wasn’t… It couldn’t be…
Then Jake was in front of her, on his knees.
And it was.
“Eliza, I Love you.” His voice shook a little. “You have terrible taste in cars, you never check your email, and you don’t squeeze the toothpaste from the bottom of the tube—”
She laughed with tears in her eyes. Big, fat happy ones. “This is the worst proposal ever.”
“—And you never let me finish what I’m saying without making a smart-ass remark.” His shoulders relaxed a bit, and he gave her a full, wide grin. “But I still Love you. Capital-L Love you. I’m going to Love you tomorrow, and I’m going to Love you ten years from now.”
“I capital-L Love you too,” she whispered.
“Will you marry me?”
“Absolutely, I will.” She dropped to her knees—desperate to be in his arms—and dropped the bat in the process.
It struck the back of his calf, and the crowd gasped.
Jake’s eyes clouded, and their next kiss was too long and too deep and perfectly rough. His ragged breath trailed along her jaw when he finally came up for air. “Did you do that on purpose?”
She batted her eyelashes and gave him her best who me? look before bursting into laughter. “No. Sorry, I’m still just a klutz.”
“Damn. Well, I’m going to make you pay for this when we get home, Herman,” he whispered.
“Promise?”
He kissed her again, slow and teasing. “Promise.”
Acknowledgments
I’m not going to write acknowledgments this time.
I can’t do it. There are too many people to thank and too few words to express my gratitude. Besides, who reads these things?
Other authors, looking to see if their friends mentioned them. That’s who.
So if I wrote this, I’d have to thank people like Debbie Burns, Angela Evans, Marie Meyer, Meredith Tate, and Annika Sharma. I’d have to tell everyone how they write some of the best books I’ve ever read, how they’re always there to celebrate or to cry with me, and how they’ve become some of my favorite friends in the world.
You know who else reads acknowledgments? Publishing people.
Then I’d have to thank my genius editor, Mary Altman. I’d need to tell everyone how lucky I am to work with someone who has truly brilliant ideas and politely tells me to dial it down when I discuss Mandroid anatomy in too much detail.
Of course, then I’d be on the hook to thank everyone else at Sourcebooks—including Laura Costello, the assistant editor extraordinaire who’s also helping me inch closer to my dream of being BFFs with Amy Poehler.
Whew.
Wait.
If I thanked them, I’d definitely have to thank my agent, Jessica Watterson, who is the true behind-the-scenes hero of this book. Plus, then I’d have to mention that she’s not just an agent. Over the years, she’s become my friend too.
See? This is already way too long and inadequate, and I haven’t even mentioned my husband. He also reads these, and I really don’t want to get divorced. Not only that, but he’s responsible for the funniest parts of this book, and I would never finish anything without him.
Plus, there’s my lovely sister-in-law, Katie, who let me write a lot of weird things about Mandroids while sitting alone in her house.
After all that, I’d still have to talk about Kyle. I’d have to explain that my hilarious, kind, ridiculous friend passed away while I was writing this book. I’d have to tell everyone how I once witnessed him literally jiggle, jiggle, tap his car back to life (and then he
refused to explain how he’d done it, except, of course, to say he’d given it the jiggle, jiggle, tap). I’d have to say something about how Kyle enchanted us all with his quiet observations, quirky sense of humor, and unending love for WWE. And he would have been so embarrassed to be mentioned in the final pages of a “kissing book.”
Good thing I’m not writing acknowledgments this time.
About the Author
Amanda Heger is a writer, attorney, and bookworm. She lives in Maryland with her unruly rescue dogs and a husband who encourages her delusions of grandeur. She strongly believes Amy Poehler is her soul mate, and one of her life goals is to adopt a pig and name it Ron Swineson.
Rescue Me
In this fresh, poignant series about rescue animals, every heart has a forever home
By Debbie Burns, award-winning debut author
A New Leash on Love
When Craig Williams arrived at the local no-kill animal shelter for help, he didn’t expect a fiery young woman to blaze into his life. But the more time he spends with Megan, the more he realizes it’s not just animals she’s adept at saving…
Sit, Stay, Love
For devoted no-kill shelter worker Kelsey Sutton, rehabbing a group of rescue dogs is a welcome challenge. Working with a sexy ex-military dog handler who needs some TLC himself? That’s a whole different story…
My Forever Home
There’s no denying Tess Grasso has a way with animals, but when she helps Mason Redding give a free-spirited stray a second chance, this husky might teach them a few things about faith, love, and forgiveness.
“Sexy and fun…”
—RT Book Reviews for A New Leash on Love, Top Pick, 4½ Stars
For more info about Sourcebooks’s books and authors, visit: sourcebooks.com
Hooked on a Phoenix
Locked in a bank vault together…
They might redefine the meaning of “safe” sex
Misty Carlisle works as a bank teller in Boston’s financial district. She’s had more rotten luck in her life than most, except when her childhood crush shows up to cash his paycheck. Then her heart races and her mouth goes dry.
Gabe Fierro is a firefighter—and a phoenix. Like his brothers, his biggest challenge is finding a woman open-minded enough to accept a shape-shifter into her life. When his boyhood friend asks him to watch over his little sister, Misty, he reluctantly agrees. But when the bank where she works gets held up, Gabe does everything he can to protect her. The two of them end up locked in the bank’s vault…where things get steamier than either of them ever imagined.
“Shapeshifting done right! This fast-paced romance is a must-read.”
—RT Book Reviews, 4 Stars
For more info about Sourcebooks’s books and authors, visit: sourcebooks.com
Dating the Undead
V-Date: The Undead Dating Service
It’s Bridget Jones…with vampires
Silver Harris is done with men. But when she shares a toe-curling kiss with a sexy Irish vampire on New Year’s Eve, she decides maybe it’s human men she’s done with… Logan Byrne can’t get that kiss out of his head. So when his boss assigns him to spy on V-Date members, Logan isn’t sure he can go through with his mission—not if it means betraying Silver.
In the tight-knit London community of centuries-old vampires, history and grudges run deep, and dating the undead can be risky business.
“Snarky, sexy, and steamy as a sauna.”
—Katie MacAlister, New York Times bestselling author of the Dragon Fall series
For more info about Sourcebooks’s books and authors, visit: sourcebooks.com
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