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Songlines Page 35

by Carolyn Denman


  ‘Guardians have no problem killing people to keep their charge safe,’ she reminded us. ‘You won’t come any closer, Bane. If she takes me across, she’ll be just fine.’

  Noah held him back, looking completely torn. This was not a situation his soft heart could reconcile. Bane’s wrist and hand were bleeding profusely, splashing sanguine drips onto the flowstone floor.

  Sarah started to back us away towards the sword. It was still revolving slowly.

  ‘Please, Sarah! You know I can’t let you cross!’ I begged her to understand. This was Noah’s mum. The woman who had cleaned and dressed my skinned knees and helped me kidnap my Barbies back from the twins when they’d held them for ransom. Her current actions seemed incomprehensible, and yet entirely predictable given what I now knew about her. ‘I won’t be able to help it,’ I pleaded. ‘I’ll have to stop you no matter the cost.’ All too quickly we were level with the sword and I could feel its heat like sunburn on my skin.

  ‘No,’ she declared, her voice cracking. ‘After everything I’ve done to Harry, I can’t just let him die. I don’t understand why he didn’t eat from the Tree when he was in Eden, and frankly I don’t care what self-sacrificing reason he might have given you. Someone needs to protect him from himself because he deserves so much better than dying in some stupid hospital!’

  ‘It’s his choice,’ I croaked, but it sounded weak, even to me.

  ‘Well sometimes we don’t make the right choices, do we?’ she cried, and with her words came a flash of insight. A memory of a night and a day spent locked away from the rest of the world. Two people losing themselves in something that was bigger than both of them. Something that should have been pure and beautiful but was tainted with the weight of a choice to be made. And she had thrown it away and chosen to marry the wrong man for all the right reasons.

  I caught Noah’s eye, and told him with silent words, in our long-practised language that felt entirely natural. It wasn’t a complex language. All I said was, ‘I’m sorry.’

  ‘Noah is Harry’s son,’ I whispered, still staring at him, and the knife at my throat nicked my skin as her hand shook in reply.

  Her voice sounded utterly defeated. ‘There’s nothing you can do to stop me, Lainie. You told me yourself when I arrived at the hospital yesterday. Cherubim can’t kill. You don’t have a choice. You’ll have to let me through.’

  I took one last look at Bane’s bleeding hand. I would not let him get hurt again. Then my eyes locked onto Noah’s shocked face and my tears begged his forgiveness for what I was about to do.

  ‘You’re right. In this there is no choice,’ I said to the woman who had once taught me how to flip a skateboard.

  Even though it was deliberate, when I thrust myself forward I was still astonished by the sheer level of pain I felt as the sharp blade sliced into my throat. And yet I kept pushing against it with all the strength I could find. Hot blood sprayed, filling my vision and my mouth. As I choked, I tried desperately to yank Sarah away from the boundary, my fingers scrabbling to hold on, but I knew it was pointless. She dropped the knife to pull away from me and it skittered away across the floor and then my fingers could no longer grip anything.

  The second our skin no longer touched, the sword flared to life, spinning so bright and fast that it looked like an exploding sun. I wanted to do something. I wanted … but I was locked. My body wouldn’t move and my thoughts refused to exist in the same space as that pain …

  A full-throated scream erupted from Sarah as the flames engulfed her, and like an extended flash of lightning, the unnaturally hot fire burned away her tainted flesh within the space of about ten fading heartbeats.

  The sword had no trouble killing people either.

  As I collapsed into blackness, I could hear Bane shrieking my name.

  Chapter 45

  Noah flew after Bane and tackled him ruthlessly to the ground, pinning him there as he watched his mother’s lifeless body burn out of the corner of his tear-blurred eyes, and Lainie’s crumpled form twitch grotesquely. Blood was spurting across the cavern floor.

  ‘Bane! Please, listen to me. BANE!’

  Bone hit bone painfully, as Bane’s elbow connected with his jaw but he managed to keep his hold. Just.

  ‘I can help her, please, listen!’

  Bane’s struggles slowed a fraction.

  ‘I need to see if she’s alive, but you can’t follow,’ Noah begged. ‘Please! Do you think you’ll be able to help her if you’re dead? The sword doesn’t distinguish motives. If it did my mother would still be alive. If you get too close it will kill you too.’

  The distraught Guardian stopped moving, squeezing his eyes shut as if he was trying to sense her. His whole body was shaking and his skin felt like it was on fire.

  ‘Bane, listen. You still feel Lainie pulling on you, don’t you? You still feel the urge to heal her. That means she’s still with us, but we don’t have much time. I need to go to her.’

  His friend stayed rigidly still, breathing hard and obviously trying to control his compulsion. At least he was starting to think again, and wasn’t trying to bite him or anything. Nervously Noah released him, watching him carefully as Bane opened his eyes again to stare at the crumpled and bloodied mess on the floor. His body was convulsing and he was trying to dig his fingers into the flowstone, but other than that he didn’t move. For a broken moment he remained frozen, but then his eyes rolled back into his skull and he slid, unconscious, to the cavern floor.

  ‘No no no no no!’ Blood slipped under his boots as Noah scrambled over to where Lainie had fallen. It soaked through her shirt and across her face, chest and shoulder. One look at the gaping hole in her neck was confirmation enough. She was no longer bleeding or breathing. She was dead and he was too late. Bane would kill himself trying to heal her. There was only one option available.

  He hauled her up and cradled her against his chest, then took one long look at the smoking corpse that had once been his mother before he turned and stepped across the Event Horizon.

  Tessa had been staring at the burnt body for too long and knew that the sweet meat stench of it would never leave her. The corpse lay level with the sword and was as unreachable as the moon. She’d been warned when she’d tried.

  It was not him. It couldn’t be. She’d felt the danger to Noah like an erupting volcano in her chest, and had driven her mother’s poor little Honda right through Lainie’s place, across the paddocks until she reached the other car. Then she’d run like she’d never run before. And then the feel of him had disappeared.

  It couldn’t be him. That boot. Melted and charred. It looked like a girl’s boot, didn’t it? God, did she want it to be?

  A low groan broke her out of her stupor as Bane finally began to stir. She’d tried to make him as comfortable as possible, resting his head on her knees and wrapping his bleeding forearm in a strip from her shirt, which was still wet from crossing the river. It didn’t seem to have helped much.

  She watched him take a hitched breath, regaining consciousness and blinking, but then he jumped to his feet so abruptly that she yelped in surprise, and only just managed to catch him when he began to keel over.

  ‘Whoa, Bane. I’ve got you, just sit.’

  But he didn’t. Instead he shook her off and began to stumble around in a total daze, searching for something. Then his eyes reached the corpse. With a furious yell, he launched towards it, but the sword flared such a violent warning that he skidded to his knees.

  ‘Bane, no! What are you doing? It won’t let us get that close!’ She grabbed his elbow and dragged him back. It wasn’t that hard—he was as weak as a day old chick. And then he threw up and she almost did the same, but she forced her trembling voice to work.

  ‘Is that … who … ?’ For at least ten minutes she’d sat in a cave, staring at a corpse, with Bane out cold and no one to tell her where everyone was.
Noah, Lainie, Sarah, Nicole … what had happened?

  ‘It’s Noah’s mum,’ Bane whispered eventually.

  Choking sobs erupted from the seething volcano inside her. Despair and relief smashed against each other. ‘Are Noah and Lainie safe? They crossed over, and they’re safe, aren’t they, Bane? Aren’t they? Where’s Nicole?’ She pulled him over to the stream and helped him wash his face.

  ‘Nicole was never here. Sarah lied.’ He tried to stand up again, but landed in the water instead.

  Tessa hauled him up, sat him against a boulder, and made him look her in the eye. ‘Where’s Noah?’

  ‘He took Lainie’s body across to Eden. She’s dead, Tess. I felt her die and I couldn’t stop it, I just watched, I just …’

  ‘No.’ Horror caused her voice to crack.

  ‘She’s gone, Tess. I failed her and she’s … she’s …’

  ‘She’s gone looking for dragons,’ a jaunty voice interrupted.

  ‘Noah! Oh my God, Noah! You’re okay!’ Tessa threw herself at him and he caught her and laughed. Laughed.

  ‘She’s fine, mate,’ Noah assured Bane. ‘A bit loopy, but fine. She just needs some time to—’

  But Bane had passed out again.

  Tessa breathed out heavily. ‘He said he felt her die.’

  ‘She did. But I made her eat … you know … from the … the Tree.’

  She gasped. ‘But Harry—’

  ‘Harry said that the Trees were never designed to have to deal with guilt and grief. Lainie isn’t guilty. We have the authority to enter Eden, and she deserves …’ He let her go, and the joy that was behind his eyes began to dim. She wished she could trap and keep it for him but knew she couldn’t. Would the transition between worlds always be this difficult for him?

  ‘I just know,’ he insisted after a long moment. ‘She can eat it. Harry and Annie, they both have reasons why they can’t …’ He swallowed. ‘She doesn’t have their baggage. I can feel that it’s okay. I just know.’

  Was he convincing her, or himself?

  Just then, his head jerked up, and his whole body went rigid. ‘Someone’s coming,’ he said. ‘Still far away, but coming.’

  ‘It’s Lily. When I saw … I had to call her, Noah. I’m sorry, but I had to. We can trust her.’

  That was when his eyes finally drifted over to the hideous pile of ruined flesh that still smoked where it lay. ‘Can we?’ he croaked. ‘How can we ever know who to trust?’

  A while later Tessa broke Lily’s gaze away from the life-changing spectacle of the miraculous sword. ‘Help me wrap her up,’ she requested softly. She’d had to ask Noah to move his mother’s corpse away from the threshold so they could deal with it, and somehow he had, and she knew he would never be the same. Then she’d sat him down next to Bane who had woken up again and was staring a spot on the ground that was slick with blood.

  They set to work with the woollen blankets Lily had brought, wrapping the body and tying it up with hay band so would be easier to carry, and Tessa wondered when she had become capable of doing such a thing so calmly.

  Then they all began the death march back to the farm.

  The engine revved loudly while the blackened corpse in the driver’s seat flopped to one side and leant against the window. From where they stood on the grassy verge, the face was the most gruesome thing to see, and Tessa gripped Noah’s right hand even more tightly as his words began to falter.

  ‘Necessary,’ she reminded him, yet again, wishing she could do more to help.

  ‘Come on, Noah. It’s nearly done. You’re doing great,’ Lily added, coming to stand on his left side and placing her hand on his shoulder. They would have been utterly lost without her—she’d known exactly how to fake a death, having already arranged one with Harry’s help, decades earlier.

  Bane stayed back, leaning against a tree. They had dosed him up on the extra sedatives that the hospital had sent Sarah home with, but they hadn’t done much, and he’d insisted on coming along.

  Closing her eyes, Tess focused on sending healing warmth through Noah’s skin, but there was nothing physical for her to heal. She let out an impatient breath. She didn’t want to rush him, but if anyone drove past now, things would get very, very complicated. Not that there was ever much traffic along the road between the Gracewood and Ashbree farms, but their luck lately had not been terrific.

  Finally, sorrowful words sprang forth from Noah’s lips and the engine revved again and then the car began to roll. There was no shouting, only quiet, heavy command. The four of them stood vigil as the Pajero sped down the road with no living person inside. By the time it reached the next bend it was travelling at well over one hundred kilometres an hour. Noah caused it to hit a large rock, so it flipped over before smashing into a tree, back end first. The fuel tank ruptured immediately and it only took a simple word for a small spark from the battery to ignite the vehicle. He let the resulting fire burn itself out naturally, with just a little help. Finally, as he sank to the ground, Tessa held him in her lap like a child as they watched the car burn.

  As soon as they returned home, Lily called Sarah’s husband and lied to him. She said that she’d left Sarah asleep and gone to work outside, but had just come in to find her missing, and her car gone. She told him she was worried because Sarah had been given such strong medication that morning. Tessa wished she could shut her ears, but they were her lies too. She would repeat them if she had to, for Noah’s sake.

  David Ashbree made the dreadful discovery soon after.

  Harry never regained consciousness, so he never knew what his Guardian had done to try to save him. Tessa waited uselessly when Noah fled back to Eden straight after the second funeral. The revelation that Harry was his real father was just another thing that seemed to push Noah further from reality—she knew he needed to get away for a while.

  Everyone seemed to accept the explanation of Lainie’s disappearance. Losing both Harry and Sarah in the same week was reason enough for her to have withdrawn from everyone’s company, and when Lily told everyone she’d decided to leave to travel around Australia, everyone accepted that she obviously needed to get out of Nalong for a while. Nicole was the only one who refused to forgive her for missing her mother’s farewell.

  Epilogue

  The young wallaby moved restlessly around her pen. It had been good for Nicole to have something to care for in the month since her mum’s death, but she’d started school again and no longer had the time to devote to her. Tessa watched the joey’s dainty mouth tug at the short grass, her long black claws digging easily into the dry soil and her muscled tail balancing her like a third leg. She no longer needed to be bottle fed, at least. Perhaps it was time.

  She watched Bane fiddle with the envelope he was holding, running his fingers along its edge, but he still didn’t open it. Then he jerked his head up as he heard someone approach. Tessa already knew who it was. She’d been waiting impatiently since the moment she’d felt him return from across the Event Horizon.

  Despite his time away, the last few weeks had taken their toll on Noah’s demeanour. She would miss that air of playful carelessness that charmed everyone he met. Having to keep the truth from his family about how his mum had died had definitely messed him up.

  Bane took a deep breath as his friend came to stand beside him. He seemed afraid to ask, and Noah didn’t make him.

  ‘She’s decided to stay in Eden. I’m sorry, mate.’ Noah’s breath sounded shaky as he exhaled. Then he turned his deep green eyes on Bane. ‘She’s living under a much more graceful sky than this one.’

  A graceful sky. Tessa’s mother had once told her that swear words were precious, beautiful things—like diamonds. They were not for everyday use. They were to be saved up for when you really needed someone to know how strongly you felt. When you heard a sweet old lady swearing, you knew she meant it. In the same way, Noah’s
elegant phrasing sounded so unlike him that it hit home in a profound way that was not to be refuted.

  Bane gripped the edge of the pen tightly, as if fighting his reflexes to prevent himself from tearing it down. ‘I nearly had her, Noah. I was so close. When she came back from Eden she saw herself the way I see her. Just for a little while. She understood, and she believed me finally … I nearly had her.’

  He sucked in a calming breath and forced himself to let go of the rail. ‘Does she even remember me?’ he asked after a moment, staring at the contented joey.

  Noah shifted uncomfortably. ‘Less and less. She remembers nothing of the events from that day. The Fruit did its job well.’ He swallowed hard, and reached into his pocket. ‘She asked me to give you this.’

  Tessa sighed as the delicate golden bracelet fell into Bane’s palm. The word ‘Shalom’ reflected too brightly back at them. It had been his wish for her, and now she had it. Peace and healing. Rest and restoration. Under a much more graceful sky than this cruel one. She watched as he slipped the jewellery into his pocket with the letter from the Army Recruitment Agency that Lily had given him.

  Then he opened the gate and let the joey run free.

 

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