Carnal Secrets

by Suzanne Wright

  “If you’re going to tell her she rushed into this or some shit like that,” began Nick, “you should—”

  Taryn snorted. “Easy there, Axton. I’m actually happy for you guys. I’m not saying I think you’re good enough for Shaya—no one will be good enough for her, in my eyes.” A huge sigh. “But it just occurred to me that this means Shaya will never be part of my pack again. Face it, Nick, you can’t obey Trey—or any other wolf, for that matter—and we all know it. But that means I can’t have Shaya back, and I hate that. Yeah, that’s selfish, but I never claimed I was unselfish.”

  Nick stifled a smile at her petulant expression. “It’s not like you’re losing her. She’ll still be visiting you and stuff.”

  “Will you be coming, too?” Taryn smirked—she knew the answer.

  “I’ll be waiting for her in the car. You people annoy the shit out of me.”

  Taryn leaned forward in her seat, her face imploring. “Please say you guys will have your mating ceremony on Phoenix territory? That’s your real home, Shaya. Nick’s family and Caleb can come too, obviously.”

  Shaya looked up at him. “I’d like that. Is that okay for you?”

  Nick shrugged. “If you want us to have the ceremony there, I’m good with that.” Trey chuckled, drawing Nick’s attention. “What’s funny?”

  “I just find myself reminded of that time when you visited my territory and the subject of a mating ceremony for Taryn and me was brought up. I said if she wanted to have one, we’d have one, but that if she didn’t, we wouldn’t. What was it you said? Oh, that’s it. You said I shouldn’t let my mate have her own way all the time. Hmm. Right back atcha.”

  Nick scowled at him. “Whatever, asshole—you mated a psycho.” Trey nodded in agreement, looking proud. Twisted.

  Chuckling, Shaya shook her head against Nick’s chest. When she nipped it, he peered down at her. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

  His arm contracted around her. “Where are you going?”

  “To make some coffee. Want some?”

  “Sure.” For the hell of it, he bit her lip hard before she pulled away.

  Giving him a mock frown, Shaya turned and waltzed back into the house. She had only just switched on the coffee machine when she picked up Amber’s scent. Her wolf growled.

  “I just wanted to say congratulations once again,” said Amber as she appeared beside her. Her eyes bulged as she added excitedly, “We have to get started on the plans for the mating ceremony!” Not only was she effectively inviting herself to the ceremony, but she was doing the BFF thing. Shaya had had enough of it.

  As everyone was still outside and the music was blaring enough to keep the conversation private, Shaya figured that now would be as good a time as any to get things straight with her and Amber. “Listen, I appreciate the offer, but we both know that it wasn’t made out of the kindness of your heart.” Amber looked appropriately offended. “You don’t want to befriend me. My guess is that, on the contrary, you hate me…because you want Nick and I have him.”

  Amber’s expression darkened, and her eyes became diamond hard, no longer hiding the hatred she had. At least she wasn’t going to play the “Oh, you’ve got it all wrong” game.

  “I can’t be pissed at you for wanting Nick—it would make me a huge hypocrite. But if you care about him, you won’t try to mess things up for him. I say ‘try’ because it’s not something you’ll succeed in doing if you do make an attempt at it. But hopefully, you won’t want to.”

  In a sickly sweet voice full of contempt, Amber said, “Of course I wouldn’t mess things up for Nick. I want him to be happy.”

  Shaya gave her a beaming smile. “Great. I’m glad that’s settled.”

  Amber turned on her heel and marched away, but then she suddenly halted and pivoted to face Shaya once more. Deviousness twinkled in her eyes. “I really do hope you two will be happy. I know a few mated dominant/submissive pairs. They’re all happy. Even the ones whose bond hasn’t completely snapped into place. Not totally happy, but happy enough, given the circumstances. Oh, did you not know that fully mating can be a problem for dominant/submissive pairs?”

  No, Shaya hadn’t, and her expression must have given that away because there was a glint of smugness in Amber’s gaze.

  “No one knows exactly what the issue is,” she said as she did a cocky strut around the room, “but it seems to be that taking the very last step is hard because it requires both shifters to accept what that means. Dominants often have to give up any ambitions of being Alpha or holding positions of authority within their pack. Submissives have to accept that they hold their mate back and that their strength will never match that of their mate. Some dominants are okay with that, but the submissive of the pair isn’t always so okay with it because knowing they hold their mate back is hard. Especially if it’s the guy who’s submissive, or if the dominant of the pair is a born alpha. But hey, don’t worry, it doesn’t mean that will happen to you and Nick.”

  But Amber would try her best to ensure it did happen, Shaya understood. It wasn’t an uncommon thing for jealous ex-partners or shunned pursuers to try to stop the shifter they wanted from fully bonding with their mate. It was the ultimate form of revenge and, in a lot of cases, it could work. In this case, it had a high chance of happening without Amber’s help because the difficulties Nick and Shaya faced were exactly those she had described.

  “Can you imagine how hard that must be to have your mate so close but for him to never totally want and accept you? That would be a hell like no other, wouldn’t it?”

  Yes, it would. If a bond seemed to be taking too long to click into place, resentment and anger and depression would build—not a good combination. That combination would then make it more difficult for the bond to fully form. Shaya had seen it happen. But she wouldn’t let it happen to her and Nick. “I guess I should make it clear to anyone who thinks of trying to interfere with the development of the bond that I won’t stand for it.”

  Amber gave a short laugh, regarding Shaya like she was ridiculous. “What is it you will do to these people? Other than cower and submit, I mean.”

  Shaya smiled. “I’d warn them that they really don’t want to find out the answer to that.”

  “But for them to defeat you…all they would have to do is this.” Amber’s dominant vibes crashed into Shaya, attempting to force her to submit. When that didn’t happen, Amber’s eyes widened in both surprise and anger.

  “Hopefully that would be enough to make those people think twice about coming at me. What do you think?”

  Clearly too infuriated to remember to keep up her sweet, friendly-friendly act, Amber curled her upper lip at Shaya…and it was apparent exactly what Amber intended to do. Before the dominant female had the chance to charge at her, Shaya quickly grabbed the knife block beside her and whipped out a knife, hurling it in Amber’s direction. Just as quickly, she threw another, and another, and another, and another…and smiled at the end result.

  As Nick walked into the kitchen in search of Shaya, he came to an abrupt halt at the sight he found. There was Amber, plastered against the wall with five knives stabbing into the wall and framing her body. And Shaya…well, she was smiling cheerily and somewhat sweetly. “What’s going on?” he asked dubiously. His mate shrugged, still the image of innocence.

  “I was just showing Amber my knife trick,” Shaya told him, pulling the knives from the wall. “Cool, huh?”

  Pretty certain there was a lot more to this, Nick narrowed his eyes at Amber. But then Shaya was in front of him, kissing and holding him…and he decided that if she didn’t care, fuck it. Having shot Amber a cautioning look—which received a gulp and made her quickly depart—he locked his arms tight around Shaya. “Are you sure everything’s okay?” Her smile wobbled slightly. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing. Or, at least, nothing I want to talk about right now.”

  Pleased that she wasn’t trying to blow him off, Nick planted a firm kiss on her mouth.
“Then we’ll talk about it later.”

  As Taryn then entered the room with Roni close behind, she smiled awkwardly at Shaya. “We might have a problem. A problem other than that Greta’s still alive and kicking, that is.”

  Shaya rolled her eyes. “What?”

  “When I spoke to Caleb on the phone yesterday, I told him about how Nick tracked you down—he was harassing me and making me feel guilty, saying we were leaving him out of everything.”

  “I don’t mind you telling Caleb.” When Taryn’s awkward expression remained, Shaya narrowed her eyes. “That’s not the ‘problem’ you mentioned, is it?

  “No. He called me just now and, well…Remember I said he complained we were leaving him out of everything? Well, he thought it was only him who we hadn’t bothered to tell about Nick finding you. So he sort of might have mentioned it to your parents, thinking they already knew.”

  “What?”

  “And they sort of might have demanded to know if he’s claimed you yet and when the mating ceremony is.”

  “Taryn!”

  “It’s not my fault. Blame Caleb.”

  Running a hand over Shaya’s curls, Nick asked, “You didn’t want your parents to know you’re mated?”

  “Not until after the ceremony, because then my mother couldn’t insist on going.” She grimaced.

  Roni cocked her head. “Why wouldn’t you want her to go?”

  “My mom isn’t like yours.”

  Confused, Roni frowned. “In what way?”

  “She’s evil,” supplied Taryn. “Her dad’s okay, though…albeit a little unbalanced.” Shaya couldn’t deny that.

  Nick tightened his hold on his mate, rubbing her back. “She’s not coming to the mating ceremony.”

  “I doubt she wants to,” said Shaya, “but she’ll go for the sake of appearances. In any case, my dad will want to be there, and he’ll force her to do her motherly duty and attend.”

  “I don’t care what they want.” Nick leaned his forehead against hers. “If you don’t want them there, they don’t go—that’s it.”

  “It’s not that I don’t want my dad there. It’s just that I know he won’t leave my mom behind.”

  “Then they both stay behind.”

  “I agree.” Taryn nodded. “Now I’m going to save my son from Yoda—he’s due to have a nap soon. If you guys are going to go upstairs again, try not to make too much noise, okay?”

  “We’re not that loud,” maintained Shaya, blushing.

  Taryn’s expression said, “Sure you’re not.” Aloud she said, “By the way, Nick, I have to say you’re good at the dirty talk—you could give Trey a run for his money. You know who else is good at it? Cam.”

  Shaya gasped, shocked. Cam was a reasonably quiet mated Phoenix wolf with the cutest baby face. “Really?”

  “Really.” Taryn shook her head in disbelief. “To look at him, I wouldn’t have thought he had it in him. I think Derren would be good at it too. What do you think?”

  Before Shaya could answer that, Nick slapped a hand over her mouth. “Just in case you say something that could get Derren killed,” he explained to Shaya. He threw a warning look at a departing, laughing Taryn, who had clearly been baiting him. He looked into his mate’s amused eyes. “You have a very strange friend. I shouldn’t like her, but I find that I do.” When amusement fled from Shaya’s eyes and they became more like lasers, he dropped his hand and kissed her hard on the mouth. “Not the way I like you, baby. I told you, you never have to feel insecure about us.”

  “Maybe you should reassure me a little. In the bedroom. Naked.”

  A grin spread across Nick’s face. “I’ll reassure you anytime you want.”

  When a soaking-wet Dominic appeared at Shaya’s side, fidgeting with a weird grimace on his face, she looked at him questioningly.

  He wiped a hand over his brow. “Is it hot in here, or is it just you?” Naturally, Nick’s fist went flying at his jaw. Laughing, Dominic barely dodged it. He had to be suicidal.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  While the males loaded the vehicles early the next morning, Shaya pulled Taryn aside in the front yard and told her all about Nick’s cognitive functions degenerating. She’d wanted to do this since last night but hadn’t been able to get her alone while the house was so crowded.

  “Jesus.” Wide-eyed¸ Taryn blew out a long breath. “Well, that sure explains a hell of a lot. And now I certainly no longer feel like strapping him to a bed and smashing his ankles with a sledgehammer like Kathy Bates in Misery.” She sighed, her expression sympathetic. “You want to know if I can heal him.”

  “Yes. Amber’s powerful, but so are you.” Seeing reluctance on Taryn’s face, Shaya quickly added, “All I’m asking is that you try.”

  Taryn dragged a hand through her hair. “It’s not that I don’t want to heal him—it’s that I’ll hate myself if it doesn’t work and I’ve let you down this badly.”

  Shaya hugged her reassuringly. “I would never see it as you letting me down.” She pulled back and held her best friend’s gaze. “Not ever, I promise. Will you please try?”

  Exhaling heavily, Taryn nodded. “Let’s get back home first. Then I’ll try, okay?”

  “Thank you.” Seeing that Nick was approaching wearing an exasperated expression, Shaya smiled. Her wolf practically melted—she was so pathetic. Once he was up close, he pulled her against him. “You look totally pissed off.”

  “Of course I’m pissed off.” He gestured to the vehicle behind him. “My motor home is full of a number of wolves, and I’ll have to deal with them for the next five hours.” Dominic, Greta, Kathy, Amber, Kent, Jesse, Bracken, and Zander had all decided they would prefer to travel in the luxury of the motor home rather than any of the other vehicles. “Thank God I’ll have you to keep me calm. You have to sit up front with me or I’ll lose it.”

  “How did you cope with being an Alpha for so long when you don’t like having lots of people around you?” asked Taryn, genuinely flabbergasted.

  “Like I told Shaya, I’d killed the pack’s old Alpha, and no one wanted the position. I did what was fair to them.” He looked at Shaya then. “And now that I’ve finally got free of that life, I have Derren doing his best to make me form a pack. Oh, don’t think I hadn’t noticed what he’s been doing by deferring to me and involving Jesse, Bracken, and Zander more.”

  Shaya gently ran her nails down his chest, trying unsuccessfully to stifle a smile. “In Derren’s defense, those guys follow you like you’re a guiding light anyway.”

  At Taryn’s chuckle, he growled. “I’m glad you find this so amusing.”

  A passing Greta, who had clearly picked up on Nick’s frustration with Taryn, patted his arm consolingly. “Don’t pay any attention to Tiny Tim.” She tossed Taryn a scowl and then carried on walking.

  Taryn snorted, trailing after the woman. “At least I’m not so old that my birth certificate has expired.”

  A laugh burst out of Shaya, making Nick’s own burst free. When her laugh abruptly died and her smile faded, Nick followed her gaze to find Amber staring at her from across the yard. The female flashed him a smile, but not before he’d seen the contempt for Shaya in her eyes. It made his wolf snarl.

  Dismissing Amber with a look, Nick cupped Shaya’s chin. “Whatever she said to upset you, ignore it.” He’d offer to deal with Amber for her, but he had come to learn that—dominant or submissive, human or shifter—females liked to deal with shit that involved other females.

  “Did you know that dominant/submissive pairs have difficulties with fully bonding?”

  Nick released a heavy breath. “Yes. But we won’t have that difficulty.”

  To her surprise, he looked and sounded absolutely positive. “What makes you so sure?”

  He dropped his forehead to hers and swept the pad of his thumb over his claiming mark, liking her answering shudder. “If we can get past our other issues, we can get past this too.”

  She supposed he had a good poin
t, but she wasn’t sure if that made him right. “And we’ll get past this other business too. We will get you healed.”

  “You’re not healed?” asked Roni, having overheard.

  Turning to face his sister and seeing the panic in her expression, Nick inwardly groaned. Respecting her too much to blow her off, he told her about the headaches and the memory lapse. “Like Shaya said, this is something we’ll get past.”

  Roni put a hand to her forehead, her eyes sad and anxious. “God, this is horrible.”

  With cautious steps, Kathy suddenly approached, obviously worried about Roni’s panicky state. “What’s wrong, honey?” She ran a hand over Roni’s hair. “You look pale. Is everything all right?”

  “You have to tell her,” Roni told Nick. “She deserves to know.”

  “Know what?” asked Amber.

  Great, thought Nick. Taking a preparatory breath, he once again explained the situation.

  “You’re not healed?” echoed Amber, stunned and panicked. “That can’t be possible. I healed you. I healed you; I did.”

  “It hasn’t worked,” Shaya told her gently. It was hard not to be gentle when Amber looked genuinely distraught. “His cognitive functions are degenerating again.”

  Amber shook her head in denial. “No, I healed him.”

  “You tried, but it hasn’t worked.”

  Tears now swirling in her eyes, Amber turned back to him. “Nick, I’m so sorry. I know I warned you the improvements could be temporary, but I was pretty sure you were totally healed. I’m so sorry.”

  “It’s not your fault,” he assured her, not being good with crying females. “It is what it is.”

  “Let me try again. It’ll work this time, I’ll make sure it does.”

  He held a hand up. “Amber, if it didn’t work the first time—”

  “Just let me try.”

  “Taryn’s going to try,” announced Shaya, which made hope enter both Roni’s and Kathy’s expression.

  “She’s not more powerful than me,” maintained Amber.