FALSE START (Gods of the Gridiron Book 2)

by Shanna Swenson

  “I want you to know that I don’t intend to replace Hunter. I know that isn’t possible. I only wish to be a valuable asset to a team that’s well on the way to their next Super Bowl. I saw what your boys did last season. I was impressed, inspired, hopeful… and I want in. I want to be a part of your organization.” Quillan gave a nod, and Madi and her father followed, smiling.

  Quillan Layton was a beacon of hope in their sullen world, and Madi was ready to get him signed. She smiled at her father, who seemed to share her feelings.

  They talked longer than originally intended, bringing up old stories, family, the team values, how they ran things, and what they expected from each of their players. Each topic brought deep talk from either herself or Quillan. Madi felt confident that he was going to be among one of their elite.

  She was taken off guard when a knock came at the door frame. Brett, clad in a light green Ralph Lauren polo and dark khakis, grinned at her and waved.

  Her excitement at seeing him overruled her professionalism as she ran at him, threw herself into his arms, and greeted him. He laughed even as he returned her hug, and they both blushed when her father cleared his throat.

  “I apologize. Quil, this is—”

  “Brett McFadden. Wow! Zeus in the flesh. Nice to finally meet you, jefe.” Quil stood and shook Brett’s hand.

  Brett smirked the term Zeus off as he always tended to do. “I’ve heard great things about you, Quillan.”

  “Likewise. I’m eager to join your ranks, man.”

  Madi had a thought then. “Would you like a quick tour, Quil? I’m heading down to the locker room before Brett and I have lunch. Which, we’d love for you to join us!”

  “Oh, of course. I’d be honored.”

  Brett looked put-off but quickly recovered with a nod.

  Chan and her father stayed behind to discuss more numbers, and their team lawyer headed in then while the three of them got into the elevator. The two men had a stare-off, sizing the other up, Brett seemed especially charged with tension for some reason that Madi couldn’t pinpoint. He’d just met the man, were they seriously comparing penis sizes? Why did men do that? Sheesh.

  “And here we are, Quil. ‘The Colosseum,’ as the boys like to call it.” Madi laughed as she showed Quillan around. Brett just followed, big arms crossed over his chest.

  They moved through the training and rehab area, the spas and meditation rooms, workout room, and finally the locker rooms before she showed him out to the outdoor practice fields. He seemed happy with what he saw, and soon, they were coming back into the air-conditioned locker room.

  Quil heard his phone ding and excused himself. “I gotta take this. Can I meet you guys upstairs?”

  “Of course. We’ll be up in a minute. I just need to grab something.”

  Quil nodded and walked off, leaving Brett and Madi alone.

  “So, what do you think of him?”

  Brett shrugged. “He seems excited. Won’t know until I’m playing with him.”

  “You don’t look so eager to play with him,” Madi fished.

  “You’re reading too much into it.”

  “No, I just see an alpha squaring off with an alpha.”

  “I’m the QB. I’m the only alpha,” Brett growled with no conviction, getting a laugh out of her. “I missed you.” He pulled her into his arms, and Madi couldn’t stop her heart from racing at his closeness. “I was hoping we could have lunch alone, but then you go and invite the newbie.”

  Madi grinned at his pout; it was kinda sexy to have him jealous. She enjoyed it, she realized. “Oh, c’mon, you get me to yourself all the time. I just wanted us to have some time with him. I’m gonna sign him. I want to make sure I’m making the right decision here. I want you to tell me what you think of him. I value your opinion, you know.”

  The way he was looking at her had her insides tightening up. She licked her lips because she felt like he was about to kiss her. Then she remembered why she was down here. Hunt’s locker.

  She moved out of Brett’s embrace, toward it confidently. She could do this. She needed to do this. It was part of her closure.

  “Mad, uh, are you sure you wanna do this now? It’s 12:15, I’m hungry.”

  “It won’t take but a minute,” she contended and stepped in front of it.

  “Madi…” Brett grumbled and placed his large palm on her shoulder. “C’mon. Let’s do it later. Please? It’s not going anywhere.”

  “Jeez, Brett.” She huffed and turned as he pulled at her. “What’s your deal? Give me just a sec.” His eyes burned into hers—flashing some uncertainty she couldn’t place—but he protested no more and stepped back, removing his hand.

  Madi moved the dial around, remembering the numbers, for they were the same as their alarm on the keypad at home. When it popped open, she braced herself. And stepped back in horror at all the pictures of herself lining the inner door. She gasped and covered her mouth in shame.

  “Oh my God.” Nude pictures, shocking pictures of herself doing sexual acts on her husband, disgracefully greeted her eyes. She quickly pulled them all down, one by one, each worse than the last, and when the final one was in her hands, she looked back to Brett who had braced himself for the hit. “You—you knew about these!” It wasn’t a question. Of course he did. They all did. She fell, hitting her knees.

  Brett was there, grabbing her before the shame ate her up and swallowed her into the ground. “Madi, listen to me.”

  “Why? Why did he do this? Everyone…everyone saw these! How could he do that? This is—” She was speechless as she rambled. Her husband had taken something sacred and intimate between them and turned it vile. She felt sick. She felt horrified. She was pissed! “That asshole!”

  She threw the pictures back into the locker and slammed the door shut, snapping the lock and turning the dial. She attempted to rein her anger in knowing her fight wasn’t with Brett; it was with the dead man who’d tarnished her image in front of the team she loved like her family. She was their CEO… and her husband had made her look like little less than a porn-star, a hussy, a prize. A prize—that’s all she’d ever been to him. It stung. It ripped her apart. It made her want to pull his carcass from the ground and beat him bloody.

  “Madi, I’m sorry,” Brett offered, looking into her eyes as he continued to hold her up from the pit of despair. “For what it’s worth, I tried to stop him.”

  She shook her head. She didn’t want his apology.

  “It’s fine.” She pulled back and adjusted her dress, wiped the tears at her eyes, and held her chin up. “I’m signing Quillan Layton. We’ll have lunch with him and after, if you have any reservations about him, let me know. Otherwise, he gets Hunter’s locker…and maybe even his number.”

  “Madi!” Brett stated with shock. “Surely you don’t mean that.”

  Oh, I mean it alright, she wanted to say. And maybe, just maybe Quillan’ll get his wife too!

  “He didn’t! Oh my God, what a donger!” Val gasped in surprise.

  “Why would he do that?” Sky asked.

  “What did Brett say?” Brooke inquired.

  “He said that Hunt said it was to, and I quote, ‘Pump him up for our baby making.’”

  “That’s some bullshit!” Brooke said. “He just wanted to show the guys what he had in the bedroom—a little sex kitten.” Brooke pinched Madi’s leg and meowed, getting an eye roll out of Madi.

  “Have Linc and Travis said anything?” Madi looked down, embarrassed. She knew their guys had to have seen those pics, all the players probably had at some point.

  “No, but they wouldn’t. They love you, Madi. Don’t let this bother you, hon.”

  But how could it not bother her? Hunter had made her look like a floozy. Those scantily clad pics of her had fed wild imaginations; no wonder some of the guys looked at her like they did. Now she understood why!

  The girls comforted her as best they could, but Madi had come home and swore up a storm. She wasn’t much for cussin
g, but she’d never felt more humiliated in all her life. She was so glad Quil had gone upstairs before she’d opened that locker. The mortification would have been tenfold.

  “So, tell me about Quil,” Brooke said, bringing the conversation back to a lighter topic, something she was known for. “He looks like a well-bred Spanish stud.”

  “Oh he is,” Madi agreed and they all giggled. She began to tell them all about what Quillan said, about his daughter, how excited he was for the team and how Brett had reacted to him.

  “Well, duh,” Brooke added, “He sensed competition. Don’t you remember how he acted when you first brought Hunter around?”

  For a moment Madi was taken back years ago, to college, where she met the cocky and attractive Hunter Thomas. Brett’s reaction had been similar then. “Wonder if he’ll let it get that far this time before he intervenes,” Madi wanted to say but held her tongue. He’d been all over her at lunch, holding her hand, dropping his palm to her back, pulling her hair from her face, throwing his arm around her as he sat next to her—if Quillan had any ideas, they would have been quickly shelved. That or there would be a pissing match at some point. Quil seemed to take the hint though and had been professional and grateful for the invite.

  “Well, too bad I’m not into football players, or I’d have to let him score with me,” Brooke laughed heartily.

  Sky’s brows went up, surprised. “Girl! I think I’d make an exception to that rule, at least this one time.” Her freckled cheeks blushed.

  “Daddy said he could only take one of his girls being with a football player. Besides, I’m more into the Christian Grey types…if you catch my drift.” Brooke winked.

  Val rolled her eyes. “Money is money, whether it’s earned on the field or in an office shouldn’t—oh, oooohh,” Val finally caught Brooke’s drift and winked back at her, getting a laugh out of the rest of them. “Hey, for all you know, he’s got a secret room.”

  Brooke shrugged. Madi wouldn’t tell her secrets. Brooke had been bisexual for a long time and never planned to settle down. If she ever did, it would surprise the hell out of Madi.

  “So, who’s down for a round of Heads Up?” Sky asked and stood, pulling her phone from her PJ pocket.

  They all raised their hands and began to play their favorite game together. Madi was glad for their company and glad they were all having a sleepover. It was long overdue. She was grateful for these friends of hers, grateful for their advice, their input and support. They made a bad situation lighter and helped her understand her husband even more. Madi felt bad about being so angry with him; she couldn’t stay angry with a dead man. She’d never understand his reasons and never get answers, but being resentful was only gonna hurt her in the long run. She had to let it go, especially since the team was holding a memorial for him soon.

  Madi had loved Hunter; he wasn’t perfect, but he’d once made her happy despite his flaws, despite his shortcomings. She was going to remember the good he brought into her life. She was going to remember the Hunter she’d fallen in love with and let the past be just that.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  May came and the mini-camps started. The draft had brought them six new players with multiple trades in the works. Contracts were negotiated, renegotiated, and signed. Numbers were flying like the hub of an airport, and Madi stayed busy, grateful for the distraction.

  She and Brett had seen a lot of one another, and as great as things were, Madi was still holding her breath for him to make a move that didn’t come. She could sense his hesitation and understood it, but it didn’t take those lonely nights away. So, she announced that very morning she was going to sell her house. Her family was shocked, especially her mother; but, as she’d told Brett, she didn’t feel it was home. It was too big, too grand, and not her taste. Hunter had needed all that, not her.

  Brett had offered to let her stay with him and she agreed. She always loved his house and felt comfortable there. Even if she and Brett didn’t get “together,” she’d find somewhere else. For now, she needed to get out of the house that still held too many painful memories.

  Today was the day of Hunter’s memorial, and Madi’s emotions were high. She was tired of talking to lawyers, looking at contracts, and sending emails. When Brett came to get her at five PM, she was already dressed and ready.

  He literally fell a step back when he saw her. She’d dressed in Hunter’s favorite yellow dress, the one that complemented her hair color and pinned it up atop her head in a twist. Her makeup was light, and she wore the single diamond necklace he’d given her on their honeymoon.

  “Wow, Madison. You’re stunning.” Brett’s eyes echoed his words, and Madi smiled as he pulled her to him for a kiss on the cheek. She took peace in his company, grateful for the solid foundation he was and had always been in her life. But even now, his touch was starting to awaken her hibernating womanhood.

  She had started to miss sex a great deal. With Brett’s overly masculine allure, it wasn’t difficult to imagine how incredible—and dominating—he’d be in bed. She imagined an alpha with an intense gentleness who knew exactly when to be rough. She cleared her throat, attempting to calm her tingling body as he took her arm and escorted her to the black limo in front of them.

  She’d not touched herself, although she’d been tempted to do so many times over the course of the last two months. It wasn’t that she had an issue with masturbation, she simply knew it would be unsatisfactory. Orgasms weren’t what she missed, she missed the intimacy of the act itself. She mostly just missed being touched and, as Brett’s big palm came to her bare back, she shivered and moaned aloud.

  His eyes darkened as she looked up, surprised by her own reaction to him. She gulped and didn’t miss his Adam’s apple bob as he did the same.

  He looked so gorgeous tonight, his big frame clad in a dark gray suit, white button down, and crimson tie with the Gladiators logo on it. All the guys would be wearing them tonight. Brett’s light brown hair was trimmed and spiked with gel. His face was clean-shaven, accentuating his perfectly-prominent square jaw, straight nose, and emerald green eyes with lips that simply begged her to kiss them.

  Despite that this party was to memorialize the accomplishments of her husband, Madi’s focus was simply on not bawling her eyes out or feeling any more shame about the fact that the entire football team had seen what she looked like spread eagle. She now knew what a Play Boy pinup model felt like—or did she?

  Brett seemed to sense her reserve and a thick knuckle grazed her cheekbone. “Sunflower, you ok?”

  Madi grinned and nodded, pulling willpower from the fact that she had her own streak of accomplishments to list, and being Hunter Thomas’s whore wasn’t one of them.

  “Just ready for a drink,” Madi stated and allowed him to help her into the car.

  “Well then, enjoy a glass of champagne on me.” He winked and settled in beside her, grabbing a bottle of the chilled libation he’d just mentioned. He poured her a glass then one for himself. “Here’s to Hunter. May he be catching deep passes in Heaven.”

  Madi smiled and nodded. She was still hurt by what her husband did and knew she’d get over it, eventually, but that didn’t change the mood she was in now.

  “C’mon, Mad, what’s the matter? What aren’t you sayin’?”

  “I’m sorry, I just… It’s hard to face all these people now, knowing that…that they know what my insides look like.” She held back her sniffle even as the tears hit her eyes.

  “Oh, Madi. I’m so sorry. I begged him to take them down. I begged him to stop putting them up. It made me sick to…” Brett trailed off, but his free fist clenched at his side. She could tell he’d had a big problem with it but, just like every other wrong Hunter had made, Brett couldn’t pay for the other man’s sins.

  “I can’t help but be angry. I know it’s stupid, but it still hurts that he would hold me in so little regard.”

  “He made poor decisions, often. He was full of himself, but he also had a big hea
rt too.”

  “A heart as big as his ego.”

  Brett laughed. “Still, you meant the world to him, Madi. You have to see that.”

  Madi attempted to rein her emotions in again. “Nobody’s perfect.”

  “No, they’re not. So, tonight, let’s focus on the good that was Hunter. The Hunter that made us laugh. The Hunter that we loved. Not on his many flaws, alright?”

  “Spoken like a true best friend.” Madi toasted Brett and said, “To Hunter.”

  “To Hunter.”

  They pulled up to the banquet hall and Brett got out, assisted Madi, and escorted them both inside.

  She smiled and greeted those around her: current and former players, their wives, administrators, coaches, big names in the NFL, her in-laws, her parents and her sister.

  Travis and Skyla, Val and Linc, Coach Haskins, Coach Cavanaugh, everyone looked great in their formal attire. Pax came up and kissed Madi’s cheek, followed by Langley, Josh, and TJ. Many players she recognized, some she didn’t—the old, the new, former players from other teams. Her face grew tired from smiling so much, and Madi was glad when Brett pulled her into a dance, grabbing another glass of champagne for her. He knew exactly what she was thinking, he always had, as if they had an unspoken language between them…like Travis and Sky had in Cancun, which made Madi’s heart flutter.

  Soon, they were being ushered to a podium and Brett was giving a speech, following the commissioner and her father.

  Brett looked to Madi as he spoke, his eyes piercing her soul. “Hunter Thomas was my best friend, and as many of you know, one of my favorite targets for the thunderbolts I throw.” He got a roaring cheer from the crowd and grinned big. “But Hunter was more than just a great wide receiver; he was like my brother. I loved him, and I miss him.” Brett looked down and Madi could see this next part was hard for him. “I was with him when we were hit, and I was with him when he took his last breath. I made pro—” He sniffled, lowering his head, and Madi had to look away from him to keep from breaking down, but looked back after a moment. “I made promises to him, promises I intend to keep; promises I take very seriously. I know that if he were here today to see all of us, he would be thrilled with the football team we have in place. I’m looking forward to practicing with you all and making us a team worthy of the title of gods.” Another roar bellowed through the crowd. “I’m gonna make Hermes proud. And I’m dedicating this year to him. I promise to give you my all, Gladiators. Follow your QB, Zeus, because we’re going to the Super Bowl. This memorial is for you, brother.”