by C. A. Harms
Immediately I look down and scan over the front of me. I half expected the hole to be located low, front and center. That’d be my luck.
Here kitty kitty. My stomach sours at the thought.
I close my eyes and say a silent thanks when I find that I am wrong.
“You going like that?” Bennett asks, and I open my eyes and take a step back. I can tell he wants to laugh.
“Blow-dryer,” I repeat, looking straight ahead at Lexi. Shooting daggers at her for not warning me, she seems oblivious to my annoyed state. She’s too busy fawning over Bennett as they fight for the last donut in the carton. “Lexi,” she looks up, “blow-dryer,” I again repeat.
“In my room, on my dresser.” She grabs the donut and moves it toward her mouth, and right before she hits her mark, Bennett swoops in and wraps his lips around her fingers. I stare, feeling a smile tug at my lips, seeing the two of them flirt though they act as though they aren’t.
Slowly I turn my body and, for a second, forget that Brantley is there until I find him staring directly at me. His brows are furrowed, his lips pressed in a tight line. He appears slightly annoyed, and I find myself wondering why.
“I’m gonna go get ready,” why I feel like I need to tell him that is beyond me. As I walk down the hall, I look back to find he is peeking around the corner, watching me walk away, and again that familiar heat returns.
Then fear hits me that maybe the hole I thought wasn’t there was, but on the backside instead. I shuffle faster and practically leap into the room to maintain shelter from hot men with wandering eyes.
Though the guys wanted to argue, I insisted on driving my car. What surprises me most is that Lexi left with the guys. On the way to Hudson, I stop to grab Sophie, and when I tell her all about the towel scene, she laughs.
“Can you imagine if you walked out in your bra and panties like you have so many times before?” I’d thought of that myself. “But if I knew it was Brantley waiting for me, I may have done it just for that fact alone. How can one man be so yummy?”
I sit silently at her side, listening to the country music on the radio singing about love and loss. My mind is drifting off to where things aren’t so complicated, and it isn’t one of my best friend’s brothers that I’m lusting after.
I have a hard time forming sentences in his presence, and never have I ever before, been so turned on by one look from a man. Only there is nothing simple about Brantley at all.
I park in the first available spot I find and pull my keys out of the ignition, looking over at Sophie. “You drew the unlucky straw tonight, sober sister.” She wrinkles her nose but takes the keys anyway. We never go out together without knowing who will be the one to drive us home that night. It’s a pact, and we also never allow one of our friends to leave with someone we don’t know.
Just as we reach the door, Sophie pauses and looks over at me. “Is Finn supposed to be here tonight?”
Her eyes are slightly widened nervously, and she bites on her lower lip.
“Not sure; why?” I already know why. I’ve quietly observed a lot of flirting in our little circle of friends. But still, to this day, I don’t think anyone has acted on any of those urges. I think they all suffer from fear of changing the dynamic of things.
“Maybe you should just talk to him.”
“Maybe you should talk to Brantley,” she tosses back at me, and immediately I feel my stomach tense.
“That’s different.”
“Only because you’re making it different,” she grabs my arm and leads me away from the entrance to allow another group to move past us. “You and Bennett have always been only friends. He flirts with everyone but somehow, he’s managed to make you feel as if liking anyone else will hurt him. That’s not fair to you; he’s your friend Sutton, you’ve never given any indication that you want more than that. So, sitting on the sidelines, ignoring what you want is not helping anyone. I know Bennett hasn’t remained celibate, so why should you?”
She takes a deep breath, and then her words soften.
“All I am saying is that if the opportunity to meet someone arises, then you shouldn’t be scared of it. Even if that someone happens to be a hot, retired Marine who is related to one of your best friends.”
She shrugs as if what she’s said is pretty cut and dry and then moves back to the door, pulling it open and waiting for me to join her. I may not want a romantic relationship with Bennett, but I do still love him. His feelings mean something to me.
But maybe she’s right; perhaps I am putting entirely too much thought into it.
Chapter Ten
Brantley
* * *
"You back for good?" Warren asks from the opposite side of the bar as he sets down the bottles in front of me. He and I talked in school but were never close. He was a couple of years older and hung out with a different crowd.
"Yeah," I toss a ten-dollar bill on the bar and reach for the beers. "Retired after two tours and far too long away from my family." It's still strange to accept that I don't have to return. It has been my life for so long, and parts of it I will always miss. But being back in Hudson feels right; it's where I belong.
"You gonna be working for your uncle?"
Before I can answer, I notice movement to my left. I glance in that direction just as Sutton steps up to the group. She's wearing tight jeans, a top that has no sleeves, and hugs her chest perfectly. Her long blond hair falls freely around her shoulders, and I can't seem to look away from her beauty.
"I see you've met Sutton," Warren chuckles, and I shift my attention back to him. "Used to think her and Bennett would end up together, but your brother is far too friendly with the ladies. Still, I'd watch it. For some reason, he guards her pretty close."
"What do ya mean?"
"He's never with her, but she is also never with anyone else. I've witnessed your brother on more than one occasion running off a guy that may have shown a little too much interest in her."
I look back toward the direction of the group of friends, and that's when I find Sutton is looking through the crowd and directly at me. She smiles then quickly reverts her attention to the girl to her left.
"Seems like she's noticed you too," Warren adds with a laugh, and this time I don't look away from her. She is painfully beautiful, but there is also a sweet innocence to her that I find alluring.
"That mine?" My body jerks in reaction to the voice at my side, and I look away from Sutton quickly. Aaron stands next to me with a smirk on his face. "You're playing with fire Brant."
"Just looking," and fantasizing, but I leave that part out.
"Looking may be the kiss of death." His cockiness is irritating. "Just talk to Bennett; what's the worst that can happen?" His chuckle as he grabs his beer and walks away leads me to believe that he already knows what can happen. Fear of my brother and me being at opposite ends of anything is the only thing that keeps me from reacting to what I've felt since the first time she smiled at me. The very moment when she turned around to face me in that gas station. Part of me wanted to chase after her, but instead, I watched her walk away.
"Brantley O'Shay," Becca, a girl I dated in high school up until the time I enlisted, pauses at my side. She looks pretty much the same, only she's put on a few pounds and cut off all her long hair. "I thought that was you." She smiles and moves in for a hug, which I accept and return. We left everything on good terms, with no messy breakup or hateful words.
"How are you doing?" I’m genuinely interested.
"Married," she holds up her finger and laughs, "little girl, who is four and a one-year-old son."
"Wow," my body relaxes when I realize this won't be some awkward, let's rekindle what could have been thing. "So, who's the lucky guy?"
"That would be me," I swivel around and see Warren smiling wide.
"Well, damn," holding out my hand, he places his in mine, and I offer a firm shake. "Congrats man," there is no jealousy on my part. The three of us carry on for a bit
longer, and Becca shows off a few pictures of her kids on her phone. I lean into the bar and laugh as she tells me about how her daughter likes to mother the little boy. Both Becca and Warren are grinning from ear to ear with pride.
Family, not just the one I grew up with, but the one I hope to have one day, are the reasons that led me back to Hudson. That togetherness, that's what I've missed so much.
Soon the band starts to play, and I join the group closer to the dance floor.
Bennett is right there in the middle of the ladies like he is some fucking Don Juan or something. Soon Finn and the other guys join, and I’m left leaning against the tall table, watching them enjoy the music. Honestly, though, my focus is on just one, as she swivels her hips and holds her hands above her head in a carefree manner.
When the music shifts and everyone lines up again, I watch Sutton. Most others are sticking to the general moves of line dancing, keeping it simple, but not her. She's spinning; her hands and entire body getting into the music which makes me smile. The way she moves is mesmerizing, and at that moment, I realize just what my brother meant when he said he could watch her dance for hours.
She is perfect.
Without a second thought, I set down my beer and move toward them all. Lexi and another girl at her side allow me to step in between them, which places me right behind Sutton. I haven't danced in years, but as I began to shuffle, it all returned to me and feels natural.
One song rolls directly into the next, and when Sutton twirls around as she has been doing all along, I see her body instantly tense when she notices I'm behind her. It's cute how she parts her lips, then shuts her mouth quickly, only to part them once again. Like a fish out of water, Sutton's unsure of what to do next. She pauses, and the person next to her bumps into her, making her stumble. She quickly recovers and starts to move, but she glances back to find me watching her every so often.
It's difficult not to move in behind her and place my hands on her hips. I would love more than anything to feel her body move against my own. Unfortunately, I found out quickly that there is no way to control how my body reacts to hers. I feel like she has a direct connection to my impulsive side, and I fear that one day soon, I'll respond without taking a moment to think it through.
Which scares the hell out of me.
Chapter Eleven
Sutton
* * *
"Sophie's got your keys, right?" Lexi asks as she pauses in the doorway of the bathroom.
"Yeah, I gave them to her when we got here." She offers me a thumbs up and pulls open the door.
"Give me two minutes; I have to pee," I shuffle into the stall and hover above the stool. My bladder feels like it is on the verge of exploding.
"Meet us outside," she announces just before I hear the door shutting, and I'm left alone.
Finishing up, I pull up my jeans and flush before going to the sink to wash my hands. I notice in the mirror the way my mascara has smudged, and beneath my eyes looks dark. Gathering a paper towel, I blot beneath my eyes and realize there's little help for my drunken appearance. I've had a great time, dancing and laughing. Everything feels almost normal even though I've been tense every time I realized Brantley was watching me or he was close. No man should ever be that attractive and appealing; it's dangerous. Though he shares the same eyes with Bennett, his seem so much different; maybe it's the way he looks at me. It's the smoldering way he watches me, a completely unreadable expression on his face, almost like he is battling some inner war with himself.
I can't help but wonder if he has the same thoughts about me as I'm having for him.
I take in a deep breath and push back from the sink. I feel tipsy as I open the door, practically stumbling out when my body gets ahead of my feet.
Colliding with someone, I place my hands on their chest and look up into the same blue eyes I imagined only seconds ago. The man I've been thinking of all night and being driven out of my mind with lust. Every sultry song, every word sang about touching and caressing made me think of him. Made me wonder what it would feel like to have him hold me tight as he hovers above me. The way the weight of his body would trap mine while he moves inside of me.
It has been far too long since I've felt a man's hands on me.
Shaking away the dirty thoughts, I find Brantley watching me, his face only inches from mine. "Sorry," I say, knowing several seconds have passed since I've run into him.
"For?"
"Running into you," I say as he grips my hips and holds me steady. I do nothing to pull away. The feeling of his chest pressed to mine makes my heart race. Neither of us is making a move to separate. I can feel my nipples harden, and for a second, I wonder if he can too.
"All the times I've talked to Bennett, and not once has he mentioned you." I don't respond, wondering where he's going with this. "I think if I had been spending my time with a girl like you, I'd be sure everyone knew."
The way my heart's racing makes me feel hot, or maybe it's the guy who still holds onto me like he has no intention of me letting go.
"Bennett and I are friends." I lick my lips and watch as his gaze follows my movements. Brantley smells amazing, cologne or aftershave; whatever it is, it's sexy.
"You have a ride home?"
Not if you offer to take me somewhere and fulfill all the fantasies I've been having.
"My friends are outside waiting."
He nods, his lips parting as he slowly exhales, his breath tickling my lips. "You should get going," disappointment fills me. "Now," the tip of his nose skims over my jaw ever so slowly, and my eyes flutter shut. "Before I do something I'll regret later." Quickly my gaze reconnects with his, and I blink a few times to clear the lust clouding my vision.
"Why would you regret it?" I know I wouldn't. I was two seconds from rubbing on him like a cat in heat.
He swallows hard and closes his eyes, taking in a slow, calming breath. I feel his fingers dig into my hips, and he steps closer, pressing me to the wall behind me. Again, his lips brush over mine, and I fist his shirt at his waist.
Kiss me, damn it! Only he doesn't.
Stepping back, he lifts his hat and turns it around, pulling it down low, shielding his eyes. "You're not mine to have," it's just barely above a whisper, but I hear him. Then he turns around and walks away. I remain where I am, staring after him, wondering what in the hell just happened.
For a few minutes, I can't manage to make my legs work. I sag against the wall, still staring off in the direction Brant walked. I want to chase after him and ask him what he meant. I wasn't his to have?
What did that mean?
Shaking off the heavy dose of lust I feel, I walk in a daze toward the bar's front entrance, and just as I step outside, I'm met with my group of friends. All the guys and my girls are standing around talking except for one; he's still back in the bar where he left me.
"I was just about to send out the search party Tink," Bennett takes my hand in his and pulls me into his side. "You girls need somewhere to stay?'' It's apparent he's been drinking. He always gets a little more touchy feely when he has alcohol flowing through him, not only with me but with every girl. "You can all crash at my place."
We've done that several times before. Taking over his living room as we pile on his sectional and recliners. The last time both Adley and I passed out in Bennett's bed, he was left to sleep on the floor.
"Sophie's sober," I point in her direction, "she's driving us home in my car."
I notice the disappointment in his eyes.
"Okay," his lips skim over my temple, and he's done that so many times before, only this time it feels entirely too intimate. After what has just happened inside, I don't need my thoughts to be clouded by anything else. So, I lean away feeling like I need some space. Yet before I'm entirely away from Bennett, an irritated grumble comes from behind us. I turn to find Brantley standing a few feet away, staring at Bennett and me. His nostrils flare, and I wrinkle my brows, wondering what in the hell is wrong with him.
He's so much grumpier and hard to read than Bennett.
"We should go," I start to pull back, only Bennett doesn't allow me to step away completely.
Looking down at my hand in his, I quickly look at his brother. I feel like I am trapped in some tug of war.
"Hey," Bennett lowers his voice and leans in closer, only I keep my eyes on Brantley. He furrows his brows. "I was hoping you and I could talk." Shifting my gaze, I turn my head ever so slightly, and without realizing how close I am to Bennett, I lean back immediately to create some distance. "You sure you don't want to stay over?"
"I should go home," I'm beginning to feel a little dizzy from the constant shift between the two brothers. "Maybe we can meet up for lunch or something tomorrow?"
"I thought we were all swimming and hanging out at the lake?" I'd forgotten those plans. "Maybe you can come over earlier, and we can talk before we go out and meet everyone else?"
Things have never been this unsettled with Bennett. I have never felt like I needed to get away from him; I've never felt uncomfortable in Bennett's presence. But right now, I feel sick.
"Maybe," at this point, I'd say anything to gain some distance. But, since when did things shift with us? When did the relationship between Bennett and me become awkward and unsettling?
He releases my hand, seeming utterly oblivious to the tension that has filled the air, and I step back, worrying my hands before me. "Bye," I offer a weird little wave and feel my cheeks heat. Then I look over his shoulder toward his brother. "See ya round, Brantley." It's lame, yes, but what in the hell am I supposed to say while all my friends are so close.
Why did you have me pinned to a wall seconds ago and then walk away? And why are you looking at me now like I've done something wrong?
