Southside High

by Mankin, Michelle

  I drew back the comforter, looking for the ribbon but didn’t find it. I picked up my guitar and the stand, setting them to the side. Then I scooped up the music that being with him had inspired. Opening the top drawer in my dresser, I dropped the sheets inside. That out of the way, I stripped the sheets from the bed. But I still didn’t find my ribbon.

  I frowned, glancing at the door. No sounds in the hall. No knock on the door from Bryan to say he’d made a mistake, that he didn’t mean what he’d said to my brother. No, not even just a hey, the sex was great, but I have to go now good-bye.

  Did he think I’d be too clingy or make too big of a deal about it afterward? Or worse, had being with me been just a terrible disappointment?

  My vision swimming on those thoughts, I began to search for my phone.

  Where was it? Maybe I had it all wrong. Maybe Bryan had to leave. Maybe he’d texted or left a voice mail.

  Unable to find my cell inside my room, I remembered tossing it aside when I’d stripped down to my underwear downstairs.

  Oh fuck! I looked out the window. It was already bright outside. Uncle Bruce would be home. Marching across my room, I threw open the door.

  “Looking for these?” Wearing a disapproving frown, Dizzy held up my cell in one hand and my prom dress and shoes in the other. “Your phone fell out of your clutch. Not sure what happened with your clothes. But I can guess.”

  “Don’t be an ass.” I took the items from him while flicking a furtive glance down the hall toward my uncle’s room. His door was closed, and I let out a shaky exhale.

  “I found them before he got home from work. He doesn’t know anything.”

  “Good.” Warmth hit my cheeks.

  “But, Lace,” Dizzy said, shaking his head soberly. “War called just a little while ago.” He placed his hands on my shoulders, and I was glad I’d thrown on an old T-shirt while combing the room for the ribbon. “He’s on his way over right now. He wants to talk to you. Do you want him to know Bryan was here all night? To find out this way? To see you like that?”

  My heart raced. My mind had turned to sludge.

  “I don’t know what to do.” I bowed my head and lifted my pleading eyes to my brother.

  “Well, you can buy a little time to figure it out if you take a shower and do something about the redness on your face.”

  “Okay, yeah, that’s a good idea.” I started to duck back into my room to grab some makeup and clothes. But his next question stopped me.

  “I confronted Bry. He said it was just a one-time deal. Is that the way it was for you? Or do I need to kick his ass?”

  Tears sprang to my eyes. The only good thing about this that I could see right now was that my brother was looking out for me. I pressed my lips flat and swallowed.

  “It was just sex,” I said huskily without turning around. The lie surely burned brighter than the whisker burns on my skin.

  How had this happened? I’d been so light and happy last night, but this morning, I felt so dark and empty.

  “No ass-kicking needed. I’m a big girl. I knew what I was doing.” Another lie. “I mean, Bryan didn’t make any promises or anything.”

  I love you from a guy in your bed who wanted a little more action the next morning didn’t mean anything. Except it had. It had meant everything to me. And I’d meant it with all my heart when I’d returned the words to him.

  Even if he didn’t.

  War

  “Hey.” I stood from the chair in her uncle’s living room when Lace came down the stairs. Her hair was dripping wet, her T-shirt old and faded, and so were her jeans. She wasn’t in a glittery prom gown with her hair all done up, but to me she was beautiful.

  “Hi.” She gave me a little halfhearted wave.

  That, more than anything she could have done, set me on edge. Lace didn’t do anything halfhearted. Not with me. She was mad as shit at me or happy. Never this lukewarm middle ground.

  Had I totally screwed up with her? Had the wake-up call at Kyle’s been too harsh? Or had someone in the group told her about the lap dance in LA with the stripper?

  “How’d prom go?” I asked.

  Pink spots of color hit her pale cheeks. “It went.” Her gaze darted around. “I saw Chad.”

  “That’s nice,” I said carefully. Crossing to where she’d stalled out in the small foyer, I took her hands. “Did Bry do something wrong?” I gave her my earnest expression. “He’s a damn good guitarist, but say the word and he’s gone, Lacey. You hear me?”

  “He didn’t do anything.” Her gaze bright, she shook her head. “He did nothing. Nothing at all.”

  My brows drew together beneath my bandanna. That didn’t sound right. I moved finding and interrogating my best friend to the top of my to-do list.

  “You two have a fight?” I asked, wanting to get to the bottom of this now. They’d never even raised voices to each other, that I knew about, even with Lace being a hothead like me. But hey, I might have a handle on most stuff, but I didn’t control everything.

  “No. He came like you asked him to, apparently.” Her expression turned bitter, like her tone. “He took me to prom. He left. End of story.” She removed her hands from mine and rubbed her temples. “I have a headache.”

  How convenient. My eyes narrowed, and she noted it.

  “But Dizzy said you wanted to talk to me.” She gestured to the kitchen. “There’s ibuprofen in the cabinet. I’ll take some, and we can sit down and talk.”

  Sure, I wanted to talk. I wanted to talk now. But I preferred to do it somewhere else. Somewhere I could take my time. Somewhere I could have her completely to myself. Get her naked.

  “Why don’t you go ahead and take your pills. Get rid of your headache. I’ve got some shit I need to do.” Mainly, I needed to find and talk to Bryan. “I’ll swing back later and take you to get some food. Then we’ll grab a few drinks and party after. Tempest has some major offers on the table, babe. We have a lot to celebrate.”

  “Party at Kyle’s?” she asked. “Usual people there?”

  “Yeah, maybe Bry, if I can fucking find him.”

  Her eyes went active. “Sure.” She bobbed her head. “That sounds great. Should be interesting.”

  Yes, it should. I was reserving the bedroom for the entire night.

  • • •

  Lace

  A lot to celebrate.

  War didn’t mention my test scores because they didn’t even factor.

  Sure, yay for the band. He had his dream. But shouldn’t he at least acknowledge mine was in the toilet?

  It didn’t mean anything.

  I gave Bryan my virginity and my heart, all dressed up in vintage chiffon, but he didn’t want it. He couldn’t get away from me fast enough.

  No texts. No phone call. Nothing.

  Yeah, it was starting to sink in. Two guys I gave my affection to, and it didn’t really mean shit. I didn’t mean shit to either of them.

  “You look really nice tonight,” War said as we walked to Kyle’s that night, bringing me back to the moment while reeling me closer to him by the arm he’d slung around my shoulders.

  “Thanks,” I said casually, like it wasn’t a big deal the hour I’d spent putting an outfit together and getting ready. “You said it was a celebration, a party.”

  I might feel broken down and rejected, but I wanted to look confident and sexy. If Bryan were around, l wanted him to see that I went on with my life, that I was fine and non-clingy without him.

  “Sorry it was only a shared pizza for dinner and not a fancy restaurant.” War stopped on the sidewalk and turned me toward him. “That will all change soon. Lots of things will. We’re so close to the big time, baby.”

  “Band meeting tomorrow night?” I asked to clarify.

  “Yeah, two great offers. Putting it up to everyone to decide. RCA or Zenith.” A shadow passed through his gaze.

  “What time do I need to be there?”

  “Show’s at nine. Meeting’s at eight.”
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  I tilted my head, wondering why he hadn’t mentioned the meeting until now. “No sound check before?”

  “No. This is just a farewell performance. I should have said something before now. But you were giving me the stiff arm, remember?”

  Yeah, I had. I allowed for that.

  “Once we’re under contract, whichever label we choose will own our asses. They’ll decide what shows we do, negotiate with the clubs and all. Stadiums and concert halls one day.” His expression brightened as the wind whipped his light and dark caramel hair around his face. Beneath his bandanna, War was undeniably handsome.

  War isn’t just some consolation prize, I reminded myself. He was unpredictable, sure, and scary when he felt wronged, but he was loyal to me, and I had no plans to get on his bad side again.

  It was just prom, a lay, it hadn’t meant anything. Message received. Bryan wanted one time and done. He got that. He was out of my head and out of my heart.

  But I could still feel him. His hard, sculpted body, the way he’d moved it, mastering me. His deep grunts of satisfaction. His approving eyes. His crisp pine scent lingered on my skin, though I’d scrubbed and scrubbed in scalding-hot water in the shower.

  Would I ever be free of the hold he had on me?

  “Sorry I missed prom.” War reached for my hand, brought it to his mouth, and kissed the back of it while peering at me with his copper-flecked brown eyes. “You forgive me?”

  “Yes, of course,” I said, and guilt seized me.

  No matter how badly War had treated me, we had an agreement and I broke it. I thought . . .

  I swallowed hard as a huge ball of emotion strained the confines of my throat.

  I thought War and I were over, that Bryan had come to claim me, that he was the fairy tale, that the love he offered me had been real.

  But it had only been an illusion. Once the curtain had been pulled back, the silly, starry-eyed girl had learned her lesson. The dream wasn’t real.

  “Love you, Lacey.” War dipped his chin. “You know that, right?”

  “Yes, War. I love you too.” I turned over our joined hands. His silver and leather bracelets slid together as I pressed my lips to his knuckles.

  “You’re mine.” He searched my gaze. “You know how Bry is. Missy isn’t the only one. You know he only took you out last night because I told him to. Because I knew it was important to you, and I look after you, right?”

  “Yes, War.” My stomach swirled, a bitter, toxic stew. “I know.” I knew he looked after me when it served his purposes. I wasn’t exactly sure how prom fit into that. Maybe there was a tiny bit more that remained behind the curtain.

  But I was in no hurry to pull it back.

  “No romantic bullshit remaining in your head about him?” War’s lips quirked. “Just me in there now, the most handsome and soon-to-be most successful lead singer in rock history.”

  “Just you.” From now on. Glancing down, I stroked my thumb across the cold bumpy surface of his rings. I glanced up, wiser, older, and hopefully less naive. “Are you planning for us to have some alone time this evening?”

  “Yes, I am, baby.”

  “Good,” I said firmly, though my stomach pitched.

  “You look good enough to eat in that dress.”

  Oh boy. War had that look in his eyes, and when he did, he got busy, and he got busy fast. He wasn’t deterrable. Then I remembered . . . I didn’t want to deter him anymore.

  “You do too,” I said huskily, knowing well how he tasted.

  His eyes darkening, War released my hand and traced the crisscrossed laces on the front of my tunic dress. The silver in his rings shone, reflecting the overhead streetlight. “This is very provocative.”

  It was meant to be. I couldn’t have my dream to design ones of my own, but I could still use clothes to project an image.

  “Ready to go inside?” He gestured to where the darkness gathered around the walkway to Kyle’s apartment. The motion light above his door was out.

  “Yeah. I’m ready.” I pulled in a breath.

  War took my hand again, and we went in.

  War

  Inside the apartment, Lace and I stood in the ratted-out living room, a line of people all the way to the kitchen waiting to offer their congratulations about the record deal. With bongs on the side tables, coke on the coffee table, drug paraphernalia basically everywhere, it felt fitting. Rock ’n’ roll wasn’t pristine. It was dark, defiant, and angry. It comforted the disturbed, and disturbed the comfortable. Why not here to receive the accolades due?

  I was glad I’d missed prom. The high school stuff was pissant bullshit. I was soon to rule the world, and I had the best, the most beautiful woman at my side.

  But just in case, I kept my arm around her. I wasn’t losing her tonight. Bryan might show. No matter what she said, there was something going on with them, and he remained a wild card.

  As usual, my plan with him was to keep him close, use him as necessary, though I had yet to locate him. His mom didn’t even know where he was, or she did and wasn’t telling me.

  The rest of the guys would make an appearance. The party at Kyle’s place was our reception, and our show afterward at Footit’s would be a final good-bye to Southside. We weren’t coming back. Ever.

  I wasn’t returning to school. I told Lace there was a choice to make regarding which label. I’d told the guys the same thing, but it wasn’t true. I didn’t feel bad about the deception, not really. It was my band. I made the decisions. The meeting was just a formality, a necessary but uncomfortable one.

  “Hey, loser.” Kyle stepped up, wearing the same shirt and jeans he’d been in the last time I’d seen him. “Congrats and all.”

  “Thanks, man.” I clapped him on the back, careful of his Solo cup of beer. He clapped me on the back and dipped his chin to Lace, careful not to touch her and piss me off. He knew how I was about her.

  “Your room is ready for you.” His gray eyes lit up like sparklers. “Left a little going-away present for you on the dresser.”

  My mouth went dry in anticipation. I hoped it was coke and heroin. One would make me hard as fuck, and the other would send me flying. Tonight, I’d share all of it with Lace. There were many ways I planned to tie her to me.

  “C’mon, Lace.” I took her arm. “Sorry, guys,” I said to those remaining in line. “Gotta fuck my girl.”

  “War!” She tucked her chin to her chest as her cheeks turned dusky pink, the same color as the nipples on her amazing tits. “You’re embarrassing me.”

  “Get over it. I’m not hiding shit with anyone how I feel about you, or what I want to do to you.”

  “Wait.” Kyle grabbed my arm.

  “What?” I narrowed my eyes.

  “Just a heads-up. Martin Skellin is around.”

  “So?”

  “Dude, the drugs for your party are courtesy of him.” Kyle shook his head. “Be respectful. Don’t give that guy attitude. Trust me on that.”

  “Okay, noted,” I said, but really the guy should respect me, not the other way around. “Anything else?”

  “Yeah. Just that Randy’s been talking her up to Martin.” He gestured to Lace. “Or he did before she spit in his face. Nice one, Lace.”

  Lace shrugged, and I made a note to find out what the fuck had happened between her and Randy.

  “Word is Skellin’s on the prowl for a new side piece,” Kyle said. “I told you before that he likes blondes. He also likes taking from others. Gets a charge out of it, if you know what I’m saying?”

  I didn’t reply. I waved my hand over my head as I continued to the stairs with Lace in tow, pretending I was heeding his warning. I was fucking her, and sure as hell wasn’t wasting time playing nice with a drug dealer. This part of my life was soon to be in the past. The days of me bowing to anyone were over.

  “Have you met the guy he’s talking about?” Lace asked as I led her up and around the usual strung-out group of heroin junkies on the stairs.


  “Yeah, once or twice. He’s not that big a deal.” That was a lie, but I’d told so many of them recently, I didn’t see the harm in one more. “I’ll look out for you. No need to worry.”

  “Okay, if you’re sure. I just thought maybe you might want to go somewhere else.”

  “No, not going anywhere else.” On the landing, I stopped and gave her a firm look. I’d waited long enough.

  “Warren Jinkins,” a familiar voice said from behind me, and a heavy hand landed on my shoulder.

  Lace’s amber eyes went wide.

  I turned and took in the tall man behind me who might be considered handsome by bitches who were into his coal-black hair and eyes, and went for a powerful guy with a sadistic bent.

  Martin’s bodyguard, even taller than he was, hung back just behind him as usual. He and his enforcer were packing heat. I’d already had the meeting where Martin had established pecking order with the added benefit of making me feel small.

  “Aren’t you gonna say thanks?” Martin said. “And introduce me to this beautiful woman with you?”

  “Thanks,” I said through gritted teeth. It was on the tip of my tongue to correct him. Lace was beautiful, but she was my woman. However, I understood the setup, understood that he wanted a power-play repeat.

  Fucking sucks.

  “Lace Lowell, this is Martin Skellin.”

  “Charmed, I’m sure.” Martin stretched out his arm, his hand extended.

  Lace hesitated, giving me a glance. She didn’t see it because she was looking at me, but I saw the flash of malevolence he shot my way. Martin was an evil dude.

  I brought her hand to his, making the choice for her. If he didn’t perceive her as a challenge, a toy that was mine that it would hurt me to have stolen away, he would lose interest. Basic Southside 101, eat-or-get-eaten, welcome-to-the-jungle stuff, but Lace remained ignorant about that and a lot of things.

  “Enjoy the party, Lace,” Martin said low, his gaze locked on hers. “There’s a parting gift on the bureau, but when you’re ready for a man to take care of you rather than a boy, call me. I’ll come, and you’ll have no regrets. I promise you.” Releasing her hand, he turned to the guy behind him. “Give the lady my card, Arturo. The one with my personal number.”