by KT Strange
Hidden River Three
Book 3 in the Hidden River Academy Series
KT Strange
Copyright © 2019 by KT Strange
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
Cover by CJ Strange.
Heartcandies Publishing
Heartcandies.com
To you, my beautiful reader, and your beautiful face.
I hope you like this one!
Contents
Stay in touch!
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Another book bites the dust!
Stay in touch!
About the Author
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One
“Mia?” My uncle was exhausted, his eyes sleep-red. I felt guilty for waking him, but I didn’t have a key to get into the house, and breaking in through one of the windows had seemed like a bad idea after a night filled with bad ideas. “Is that… Colt Lawson?” My uncle looked past me to where Colt stood, leaning against the side of the SUV he’d driven me home in. “Son, what’re you doing here? What are you both doing here? You should be at camp.”
“I needed to come home,” I said, swallowing hard. “Please don’t be mad.” I didn’t think I could handle him being angry at me. I needed my uncle to be understanding more than ever. My world had shattered around me, seeing Buck and Shawn like that. The long drive home had been mostly quiet, Colt leaving me to my thoughts. I’d fallen asleep for part of it, only waking up when we’d pulled off the highway onto the road leading to my uncle’s place. I never asked Colt how he knew where I lived. That was a question for later.
“I’m heading back now,” Colt said, sounding tired himself. “I… uh I borrowed the SUV from camp.”
My uncle raised an eyebrow.
“You’re not driving tired,” he said and then sighed, looking even more worn out. “Okay, whatever the reason, I’m just glad you came here. Colt, there’s a spare bed for you, but you’re staying here and getting some sleep. I’ll make some calls to the camp and explain… I’ll make something up, I guess.”
“Thank you, Uncle Matt,” I said softly. I was grateful he wasn’t asking too many questions. I followed him inside. He went to pick up the cordless phone, pointing to the basement door.
“Bed’s down there, Colt. It’s made up, so you’re good to go.” He walked into the back of the house, toward the den where he liked to hole up and have his man-time. I heard his low voice as someone on the other end of the line picked up.
Colt put a hand on my shoulder and I turned to him. He gave me an exhausted smile, and then chucked me under the chin.
“You sleep good, okay?”
I felt raw, exposed, and unsure if sleep was even going to happen after my nap in the car. My eyes watered and Colt’s smile melted.
“Shit, Mia,” he said, “Can I…” He offered me his open arms. I buried myself into them, hiding my face in his chest as I cried. I didn’t want my uncle to hear, so I held the sound in, the pain in my chest feeling greater than anything I’d ever experienced. Why was it, that no matter what you went through, new pain was just as bad as the old? You never got used to it. It always flayed you, down to the bone. Betrayal kept leaving me gasping for breath, sobbing in silence.
“Why does everyone always leave?” I asked, even though I was sure Colt wouldn’t know the answer to that. Hell, I wasn’t even sure what I meant by it. Shawn kissing Buck, Buck kissing Shawn… it was like they were pushing me away. Forcing me out. Leaving me behind. His arms were warm around my shoulders and he held me, not too tight, like he was giving me space to cry but also to pull away if I needed it.
When had he become such a good person? Had he always been that way, and I’d just been so stupid that I didn’t see it? I’d believed the face he wore at school, the angry loner that didn’t give a fuck about anybody or anything. Slowly the truth about him and unfolded, and if I was honest with myself, Buck and Shawn were both coming up short.
“Sorry’m getting your shirt wet,” I mumbled, pulling away to wipe at my face. It felt swollen and sore. “Am I mess?”
“So sexy,” he said, his smile soft despite the sarcasm in his voice. “I always like my girls sobbing and snotty. It’s the best.”
“Jerk,” I said, punching him in the shoulder. “And I’m not your girl.”
“Mmhmm, that’s fine.” He shrugged. “You be your own girl then. I’m good with that too.” There was something about his words that broke something inside of me at the same time as fixing me. I took a staggering breath and stared up at him.
“I should go to bed,” he said, looking at the door to the basement. “You should go too. Upstairs,” he clarified.
“I… yeah,” I said. He moved past me, kicking his shoes off by the door as he went.
“Hey,” he said, and I turned to look at him. “It’s okay to not be okay,” he said. “So I’m not gonna ask you if you’re okay, or if you’re gonna be okay. Because I think you probably don’t know the answer to that yet.”
I stared at him. He was so confusing. He kept making me want to cry, but it wasn’t because he was hurting me. He just knew me too well. Like he’d been there too. Like he’d been hurt like I’d been hurt.
“Also, don’t forget to hydrate,” he said, shooting finger guns at me before walking to the basement door and disappearing behind it. The door clicked shut and I stood there, like an idiot, for several minutes.
“Water,” I muttered to myself, because sometimes talking out loud to yourself helped you actually get hard things done. Right then, any kind of self-care felt like something I just didn’t deserve. Emotions and heartbreak were weird.
The tap burbled, the ice clinked, and I downed half a glass of water in a breath.
“So,” my uncle’s voice behind me startled me and I jerked, spinning on my feet.
“So,” I said, giving him as steady a gaze as I could. I hoped my face wasn’t red, but from the tired, sad look that my uncle wore, my hope was all in vain.
“You want to talk about it now or later?” He asked. “I made my apologies to Mrs. Williamson. I think things are smoothed over, but we’re going to need to return that SUV tomorrow.”
I nodded and took a slow sip of water, letting it cool my mouth and trickle down my throat.
“I think I need to break up with the guys,” I said, staring down at the surface of water left in my glass. My uncle let out a low breath.
“Want to sit?” He offered, pointing to the couch. I shook my head.
“I need to sleep on it,
” I said. Because I did. I wanted a clear head, and some quiet time to think about things, before I made a final decision.
The problem was, my brain kept trying to explain away what I’d seen. Buck and Shawn, kissing? Nah, Buck was just choking on his own vomit and Shawn was trying to suck the puke out of his mouth. I closed my eyes.
It wasn’t just that moment though. With a little distance, and a lot of talking to Colt, I’d realized something really ugly about my relationship with Shawn and Buck. It had always been about them. Their needs. They ghosted on me when it benefited them. They came back to me when they wanted me. I’d been the one who’d taken the brunt of shit at school because of them both. They had always come out squeaky clean in the eyes of our classmates. I was the slut, they were the studs. And they’d never really done much to change that, had they?
That reality as painful. My chest felt like a weight had been left on it, compressing me slowly, preventing me from breathing.
I’d always been beneath them. The power dynamic in our relationship was always off. From the beginning I’d relied on them to keep me safe, which was stupid. I should have made myself safe. I should have protected myself. Stood up for myself.
A new feeling was unfolding over me. A sort of pained calm, reminding me that the only one that was going to ever truly have my back was me.
And I’d been letting me down.
“Mia?” My uncle interrupted my thoughts. “You should really sleep.” He came toward me, and gently took the cup from my hand. It was empty anyway. As he set it down, I swallowed and then hugged him hard from the side. He made a noise, like he was in pain, and hugged me back. “I promise you, it’ll be better in the morning.”
“Yeah,” I said, swallowing back tears. I needed to sleep, and crying again was going to delay that. “I think it will.”
He probably thought that I’d had a fight with Shawn and Buck at camp, or something that could just be… fixed.
What’d happened couldn’t be fixed. At least not by the guys. It was up to me to make the changes I needed in order to be okay going forward.
A future beckoned to me, and I wasn’t sure that Buck or Shawn had a place in it. I wasn’t even sure about Colt, for all his professions of feelings in the car. Yeah, he was being a good friend, and had stuck by me through some seriously rough times…
But maybe I needed to be just Mia. Single Mia. Mia without anyone tying her down or doing things that got her in shit with other people who gave waaaaay too many fucks about who I was fucking.
My legs somehow got me up the stairs, and I was in bed before I knew it, the earth feeling like it was slowly spinning. I was tired. Tired and hurt in ways I’d never seen coming.
I closed my eyes, knowing that everything was different, and the sun was going to rise on a different version of Mia.
A Mia that was done taking other people’s shit with a smile.
And if anyone had a problem with that? They could take themselves swiftly and surely out of my life, forever.
***
Colt was gone in the morning, though he’d left me a note telling me to eat a lot of fucking chocolate and get fat if that’s what made me feel better. His words had a smile tripping across my lips before the memories of what had brought me home had me frowning. My uncle was out as well, and I was left to my quiet thoughts.
I wondered if they were panicking, Shawn and Buck that is. Where they terrified of what I’d seen, and what I thought? Were they wondering if they’d lost me, or were they just worried about what I would tell other people about them? It was making my heart hurt, and sleep hadn’t fixed that all that much.
It was like I needed to start over. It wasn’t fair. Hidden River Academy was supposed to be my fresh start, a new beginning, leaving my old hard life behind.
Instead a group of students had decided to make my life hell as much as they possibly could. My body was aching after last night, and my sleep hadn’t been as good as it could’ve.
A rumble of a car in the drive way had me sitting up from my slumped position on the couch, Colt’s note strewn on the coffee table.
A car I didn’t recognize was outside. I got to my feet just as car’s door opened and Garrett stepped out. My heart went to my throat immediately. I ran to the front door, walking out onto the porch with determination in every step.
“What’re you doing here?” I snapped. It was like looking at Shawn, but Garrett’s hair was a little longer. It wasn’t that hard to tell them apart now that I knew them so well. Too well.
Garrett shoved his hands in his pockets and looked up at me, his eyes sad.
Fuck his eyes. And fuck his brother. They were both hurting me.
“You should have told me,” I blurted the words out. “You knew.”
Garrett sighed, the sound gusty, pained. I didn’t feel bad for him. Anger was making my stomach shudder, and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to scream at him or vomit.
“Did you let it slide because you were in love with Shiv?” I demanded “Is that why you never said anything? Because you wanted the right moment to get in good with her?”
Garrett held up his hand, like he wanted me to stop talking. I shook my head so hard that my hair got stuck to my lower lip, and I wiped it away with an annoyed growl.
“No, you don’t get to call the shots here, okay? You fess up to me about what’s been going on. Everyone’s been talking about me and nobody’s been talking to me. I’m tired of being yanked back and forth like a rag doll. I’m a person, Garrett, I have feelings, and my thoughts and opinions matter.”
I’d stepped off the porch, the gravel of the driveway biting into my bare feet. The pain didn’t deter me though. I stared up at him, demanding with my eyes that he tell me what the hell was going on, and how long he’d known.
“It’s not my story to tell,” he said in the silence that pulsed between us.
“Like hell it’s-”
“Shawn needs to talk to you himself, because even if I did tell you all of it, you’d never believe me,” he interrupted me. “Mia, I know you’re hurting-”
“You have no idea how I’m feeling right now,” I cut him off right back. To say I was over being talked down to and talked over was an understatement. They’d done me wrong, all of them. My throat clenched and I could barely get the words out. “The last people I want to be hearing from about how they know what I’m feeling is you and your brother, and your asshole friend Buck.”
Garrett sighed, his eyes closing, and he lifted one hand to pinch the bridge of his nose, like he was irritated with me. Or maybe the situation. Fuck his feelings. I hoped I was irritating the hell out of him. I hoped that my words, my refusal to back down, was lodged under his skin, stuck in his throat, reminding him with every breath that he’d participated in some serious bullshit that had nearly wrecked me.
“You tell me your part of it,” I said, tilting my head to the side, feeling malicious and not guilty for that fact at all. “You tell me your part of it, I will go to my uncle and I’m going to explain to him exactly what I think of you.”
Garrett went white, his cheeks hot-red in contrast.
“Mia, you can’t-”
“You think he’s going to give you any kind of recommendation when you were at the very least aware that my boyfriends were playing around on me behind my back just so you could get in Shiv’s pants?” Yeah, I was willing to fuck his future career at university over this. It wasn’t just Buck and Shawn. It was all of them. They’d watched me get bullied within an inch of my life, physically assaulted, and worse. I was going to use every weapon I had at my disposal.
His eyes narrowed and he stepped toward me, his shoulders squaring. It should have been intimidating. Somehow coming to Hidden River had made me forget where I’d come from and what I’d lived through before I’d ever seen campus. I wasn’t small. I wasn’t weak. I’d seen tougher guys beat the shit out of each other than Garrett fucking Riordan.
I settled my shoulders right back, and took a dee
p breath, raising my hand and shoving him hard in the middle of his chest. He flinched, but didn’t move.
“Don’t fucking threaten me,” I said. “I am done with your shit, Garrett, I thought you were my friend. Didn’t that mean anything to you? Does anything mean anything to you at all? Or are you just another selfish fuck-boy, wanting to get his dick wet and who cares who he hurts in the process?” I couldn’t help the way I got choked up. Thinking about Buck and Shawn in those terms hurt. It felt like something was clawing it’s way out of my chest, Alien-style. Would all my experiences be overlaid with the hazy mental-image of the two of them curled in bed together, kissing?
Fuck. Fuck.
“I thought you’d understand,” Garrett muttered, looking away, his shoulders slumping as he shoved his hands in pockets. My mouth went dry with rage, but before I could squeak out an angry reply, he continued. “I’m not in love with Shiv I just…” He frowned, a crease forming between his eyes and he rubbed at it, like it bothered him. “Shawn tried to make it work with her, shit, I really can’t be talking about this-”
“Don’t make me wreck your future,” I threatened, and he glared.
“Fucking stop it,” he snapped. “You’re not the only one hurting here, alright?”
“Yeah but I never asked for any of this,” I yelled, my temper exploding. “I never asked for any of you to take an interest in me, or for Shawn to fucking… dump Shiv for me-”
“Shawn never asked for our dad to beat the shit out of him all the time because he’s into guys,” Garrett roared, stepping forward, his hands coming up like he wanted to grab me. He swallowed, his eyes hectic. “Fuck, I shouldn’t have-”
