NOT SO Beautiful: a bay falls high novel

by Kidman, Jaxson

  “You know what you fucking did,” Max said. “And you’re lucky we didn’t kill you ourselves.”

  Kill?

  “Hil, wait a second,” I called out.

  A hand touched my back. “No use, angel.”

  Ash was next to me again.

  “No use for what?” I asked.

  “This needs to happen,” Ash said.

  “What did he do?” I asked.

  “Fucked Owen’s girl at a party last weekend,” Ash said.

  I looked for Owen and saw him standing with Ryan.

  Ryan still couldn’t talk so he was writing something to Owen.

  This was all so fucked up.

  Uly hit Ryan in the jaw. Hil broke Ryan’s jaw.

  And now everyone was just… what?

  It was fear and respect all mixed together.

  “You’re kicking his ass because he slept with some girl?” I asked Ash.

  “Well, it goes a little bit more…”

  “This piece of shit right here,” Hil announced, “decided that dipping into Haley wasn’t enough, he tried to get info from Maya… to figure out Belle.”

  “Me?” I asked. “Again? I’m involved in this again?”

  “He was going to get close to you, doll.”

  I gasped and saw Uly on the other side of me.

  “And I’m about to run out of patience here,” Uly said. “We don’t need a show. We need a beating.”

  “Get close to me how?” I asked.

  “By any means necessary,” Ash said.

  “I’m not stupid. I would never fall for that bullshit.”

  I said that as I stood between two guys who I didn’t quite know their intentions. While a third one stood ready to beat someone up.

  Just because that someone mentioned me.

  “This piece of shit thinks we don’t need any kind of… I don’t know… maybe just learn how to act the right way,” Hil yelled. “Now I offered to let Owen handle things, but he needs his hands in good shape. For pitching and now for jerking off. Since his girl is all infested…”

  Oscar let out a quick laugh.

  “Fuck this,” Uly said.

  He moved and I grabbed for him.

  I couldn’t stop him though.

  He pushed Hil out of the way and threw a right hook that spun Oscar around.

  Well… the top half of Oscar turned. The bottom half didn’t.

  He fell, looking really funny.

  Hil jumped at Uly. “This was mine, asshole.”

  “You were taking too long,” Uly said. “Were you going to cook him dinner and tell him he’s pretty before hitting him or what?”

  “Fuck you, Uly,” Hil yelled.

  “Fuck you right back,” Uly spat.

  Oscar put his hands to the ground and let out a groaning sound.

  “Well now I have to finish what you started again,” Hil said. “Dammit. I wanted a decent fight here. I was going make him actually fight me.”

  “Here, I’ll help then,” Uly said.

  He grabbed the back of Oscar’s shirt and helped him up.

  Oscar swayed and groaned as he literally cried.

  “Oh, fuck,” Hil said. “He’s crying.”

  Uly slapped Oscar’s face. “Do you want me to hit you again?”

  “No,” Oscar said.

  “Then stop fucking crying. Stand on your own. And swing at Hil. Okay? So he’ll stop bitching.”

  “I’m not bitching,” Hil said. “You stepped in on me.”

  “Then step up and do the right thing,” Uly said.

  “Move out of the fucking way and I will,” Hil said.

  I looked up at Ash. “They fight like they’re brothers.”

  “Yup,” Ash said. “It never ends. They’re still having the same argument that started in fifth grade.”

  “Which was?”

  “Who kissed Cora first,” Ash said.

  “Girls… always girls…”

  Ash shrugged his shoulders. “Want to know a secret?”

  “Sure.”

  Ash leaned toward me. “I kissed Cora first. But they don’t know that.”

  I opened my mouth but saw movement from the corner of my eye.

  Hil punched Oscar again.

  He fell right back down to his ass.

  Hil stepped forward and planted one knee into the ground.

  As he picked Oscar up by his shirt, he shook his head. “I think you know what happens next, right?”

  “Yeah,” Oscar said.

  “Tell me.”

  “I say I’m sorry and I’ll never do it again. I didn’t mean anything by it, Hil. I didn’t know you guys were taking her. I swear on that. You know me… I’m a straight, honest guy.”

  “Why’d you fuck Owen’s girl then?” Hil asked.

  “Because I felt like it,” Oscar said. “And she told me Owen can’t get hard. That all he cares about is baseball. That she feels forgotten. You know she’s got an ass to die for. How could I help myself?”

  “I appreciate the honesty. So I’m not going to beat you into the ground for that.”

  Hil stood up and walked toward me.

  I stared at him.

  “Can I have my jacket, beauty?” he asked.

  “Oh. Here.”

  I held it out, my tongue ready to start wagging at him.

  “You’ll have to make up for that one,” Ash said.

  “Agreed,” Hil said. “I’m all horny for a fight now. Fucking Uly screwed me.”

  “Fuck you,” Uly said. “I’m going to have a smoke.” He looked at me. “I will see you later, doll.”

  “I’m sure I will,” I said. “Can’t get away from you now, can I?”

  “So romantic,” Uly said.

  He leaned toward me to kiss me.

  Ash slammed his hand to Uly’s chest.

  “You want to think about what you just did?” Uly asked Ash.

  “No,” Ash said.

  “This isn’t over, Ash,” Uly said. “Far from it.”

  “I can kiss whoever I want to,” I said. “It’s my choice.”

  “Then kiss me, doll,” Uly said.

  I heard a whistle.

  We all looked and saw Max waving his hands, pointing to Oscar as he started to slump away.

  “Go for it!” Hil called out.

  Max whistled toward Owen.

  Owen threw his glove and ball to the ground and went to get a baseball bat.

  I covered my mouth, knowing what was going to happen.

  “I’m not watching this,” I said.

  “I’ll walk you to your car, angel,” Ash said.

  “I’ll walk her down the third base line all the way home,” Hil said with a laugh.

  “I’ll carry her so she can use her energy for something better,” Uly said.

  I looked for Lizzy and Danica.

  They were all the way at the entrance to the field.

  Behind me I heard Oscar scream.

  I shut my eyes.

  I shivered.

  And not because I was scared.

  Because I wanted to know why I liked it so much.

  four

  I sat on the hood of my car and stared at the ocean.

  This was the kind of view I could really get used to.

  I smoked my cigarette fast with my nerves and heart racing so wildly.

  “So here’s what you do,” Lizzy said. “You forget about it all for one second. You come with us to Raza’s beach house tonight.”

  “What?” I asked.

  “Party,” Danica said. “At the edge of town. Great little place. Well, not little… but you know, beach house little.”

  “We go and we have a drink or two. We dance. Flirt with some cute guys. Forget about everything.”

  “I can’t forget… what I just saw. What keeps happening. That I think I like it all.”

  “Told you,” Danica said. “She’s sucked in.”

  “But why?” I asked.

  “That’s how they do
it,” Lizzy said. “Choose. Use. Lose.”

  “But you know that,” Danica said. “So maybe use Them right back.”

  “For what? What am I going to do with that?”

  “I don’t know,” Danica said. “Get info on them? Mess with them? What are you going to do? Fall in love with all three and hope something happens? Come on, Belle…”

  “No,” I said. “I’m still in control. I can leave whenever I want. Remember that. I am not stuck here. I choose to be here.”

  “There you go,” Lizzy said. “You choose Them. You use Them. And then you lose Them.”

  I jumped off the hood of my car. “I don’t know what that means. I don’t know what any of it means. What this all is. You saw how they acted…”

  “I saw you kissing Ash,” Danica said. “I thought I was going to… finish…”

  “And I made an idiot of myself in front of Ash,” Lizzy said.

  “How have we not talked about that yet? What were you thinking? You said pussy. For what? Were you calling him that?”

  “No,” Danica said. “She was talking about her-”

  “Stop!” Lizzy yelled. She touched her cheeks. “Stop. Look, nobody walks away from Them without getting hurt. But for just one fucking night here, can we do something fun like this? Just go to a party and enjoy the moment. Please.”

  “Yeah, sure,” I said. “I can do that. Whatever you want to do.”

  “And don’t text Them,” Danica said.

  “Leave Them hanging,” Lizzy said.

  “Stop telling me what to do,” I said. “Please. Just fucking stop.”

  “I’ll pick you up later,” Danica said. “I’ll be everyone’s ride.”

  Lizzy laughed. “That’s been her motto since eighth grade.”

  “Really?” Danica asked. “That’s where you want to go right now?”

  They started bickering at each other as they went to Danica’s car.

  I finished my cigarette as I stared at the ocean.

  Uly. Hil. Ash.

  They were big, strong, tough, mean. Yet they had these glimpses of being calm and sweet. Hil telling me he wasn’t going to share. Uly trying to kiss me and Ash stopping him. Ash getting pissy and jealous because he knew I had kissed Hil and Uly.

  And then me.

  Me.

  Belle.

  Belle Bablebit.

  Stuck in the middle of three hot bad boys that were for sure going to rip my heart into pieces.

  And I couldn’t get enough of it.

  And I wasn’t sure what kind of person that made me.

  Dumb like my mother? Or a badass like Jo?

  Or maybe just someone who was lost.

  Like being in the ocean.

  Lost at sea.

  With monsters all around me.

  Except I wasn’t trying to get away from the monsters.

  I was trying to get closer.

  Knowing with each kiss, things were getting wilder and hotter. Knowing with each kiss, the tension was building. And different kinds of tension too. The tension in my body… they made me ache for release…

  And the tension between Them.

  Old feelings and bad blood… parts of the story I didn’t know all about yet.

  “Fuck,” I said as I finished my cigarette.

  Lizzy and Danica had been right.

  I should have run.

  But it was too late now.

  So I’d just settle for a night to forget about it all.

  It wasn’t like anything bad ever happened at a party… ha.

  * * *

  I actually took more than a minute to look around the closet in the bedroom, wondering if I should get changed into something… nicer?

  The closet - of course - was a giant walk-in closet. With custom lighting, glass cabinets that were floor to ceiling, and an island in the middle where I could put clothes out and look at different outfits. Not to mention the two thousand mirrors.

  It was half full, a quarter of that my clothes. It would take me forever to buy enough clothes to fill the closet. But I did have that perfect see through blue credit card. And I was pretty sure Jo wouldn’t care what I bought. Just as long as it wasn’t something dangerous or illegal.

  I left the closet wearing the same clothes I had entered with.

  I wasn’t sure what kind of parties where thrown at BFH. A bunch of rich people getting together at a beach house. I sort of envisioned everyone in thick knitted sweaters, classical music playing, someone handing out fancy cheese that smelled as bad as it tasted. And they all sat around, laughing over dumb stories about their money.

  There was no way Lizzy or Danica would be like that though.

  And I was thinking way too much into it.

  It was a party. With drinks. And I had someone willing to drive me home.

  I had a little time to waste and there was nothing quite like wasting time on the beach. It still made me giddy that the backyard was the beach. Growing up with my mother we never really had a backyard. There were apartment buildings with little patches of grass here and there. But the beach? Yeah, that was the winner.

  I thought about calling my mother. Checking up on her. Seeing if she and Chester were still together. Which they probably were because if they weren’t, she would have been driving me crazy. And if she was with Chester that meant she was happy. It was a temporary kind of happy.

  But I was one to talk, right?

  I was juggling a lot of feelings (and other things) when it came to Them.

  Loving the attention… wanting more… but then running when it kind of got serious.

  When they touched me and kissed me and said things to me it was perfect.

  But the desire and the need to hurt others… that scared me.

  “Belle? Are you out there?”

  I stopped and looked around.

  I heard Jo’s voice but couldn’t see Jo.

  “Jo?”

  “I’m talking over the kitchen speakers,” she said.

  “The kitchen has speakers?” I asked.

  “The entire house does,” Jo said. “Everything is monitored. Do you want to talk some more about my thoughts on personal security?”

  I shook my head. “Uh… no…”

  “Good. Get your ass in the hallway behind the kitchen. I need your help.”

  I walked to the hallway behind the kitchen and had no idea what was waiting for me.

  It was Jo.

  I was in a part of the house I had never seen before. Which wasn’t saying much because there were a lot of rooms I hadn’t seen yet. But this part was one I was told I wasn’t allowed to be near.

  The hallway was lit up by the natural light of the sun thanks to the wall of windows that went from the kitchen all the way across the first floor of the house at the back.

  Jo stood with her hands holding her hair up, wearing a shirt that was unzipped halfway down her back. There were tattoos on the back of her neck that went down the middle of her spine. It looked like birds or something. Birds that turned into…

  “You here?” she asked.

  “Yeah,” I said.

  “Zip this for me. I can’t reach it for some reason.”

  Jo showed me by trying to reach with her left hand. She was a centimeter away from the little, red zipper but her hand was shaking.

  I noticed she was wearing jeans.

  They clung tight to her body, showing off curves that I could only ever really dream of.

  I touched the zipper and tugged at it.

  “You have tattoos,” I said.

  “Yeah. Don’t get drunk after finals and end up dancing on a bar, drinking tequila from the bottle. And then don’t find the guy covered in ink and tell him you want him to convince you to drop out of medical school. Because if you do that, he’ll take you to his tattoo shop at three in the morning and then you’ll be topless, on your stomach, getting tattooed.”

  “I think the tattoos are nice,” I said.

  Jo looked back at me. “Ag
reed. But fooling around on a tattoo chair? Not so nice.”

  My face turned red.

  Jo was wild.

  But she had the money and brains to back it all up too.

  “You look amazing, Jo.”

  She quickly turned, letting her hair down. She looked down at her chest and put her hands at her sides and slid them down her body.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah. You always look amazing.”

  “But right now? You’re sure?”

  “You’re nervous.”

  “What?” Jo yelled at me. “Go away, Belle. Go write a poem.”

  “Now you’re getting defensive.”

  “Great. I don’t offend you anymore?”

  “I don’t think you ever did,” I said. “You’re mean. You’re a bitch. But offend me? Nope.”

  “Walk away, Belle.”

  “You’re nervous about going out with someone?” I asked.

  “I asked you to zip up my shirt,” she said. “Not have a conversation like we’re friends. Okay?”

  “Okay,” I said. “I hope you have a good night. Make sure to put something on the doorknob so I know if you’re with someone.”

  That at least got a quick flicker of a smile from Jo.

  “You’re not allowed back here,” Jo said.

  “You called me back here.”

  “Now I’m telling you to leave.”

  “Do you really have cameras and speakers all over this house?”

  “Why? Are you afraid you’ve done something in front of a camera?”

  “What? No.”

  “Not that it’s my business and not that I care, but you look a little different, Belle. You look confused. Worried. Tired. Moody. And don’t try to give me a story about your period. Actually, don’t give me a story at all. I shouldn’t have said anything. Just don’t get into trouble.”

  “Any trouble I get into, I can get out of,” I said.

  “Well said,” Jo said. “Now go.”

  I backed up. “Hey, Jo…”

  “What, Belle?”

  “You looking fucking perfect,” I said. “And whoever you’re meeting… if they don’t see that… rip their fucking heart out.”

  Jo grinned. “I am qualified to do just that.”

  I turned and Jo turned.

  We both went our separate ways.

  I went outside and hurried across the concrete around the pool to get to the beach.

  I still couldn’t believe that having a pool wasn’t exactly good enough.