Jerrold

by Katie Dowe

  “By doing what exactly?” Robert asked him. He had been talking to his daughter and had asked her repeatedly to call Jerrold and let him know that he was going to be a father, but she had refused and had tied his hands. He would not betray her.

  “By apologizing for one and for explaining my behavior if I can.” Jerrold ran his hand wearily at the back of his neck. “I thought I would never walk again, and it terrified me. Then when the doctors told me that there was every chance that I would walk, but they were not sure I could ever play ball again, I was devastated and then I wanted to die! I was planning to give it all up but at the point I realized that I wanted to stop playing on my own terms not forced to give up the thing I loved.” He closed his eyes briefly. “I pushed her away and I kept pushing her away because I did not want her to see me like that. I just want a chance to explain.”

  Robert felt himself weakening, but he still could not betray his daughter’s trust. “I am sorry, Jerrold,” he said in an apologetic tone. “She will have to be the one to contact you.”

  He nodded in defeat. “Will you tell her that I need to talk to her?”

  “I will.”

  He got to his feet and closed his eyes briefly as he felt the tremors.

  “You still need to rest your legs, you are not entirely well,” Robert advised him.

  “And here I was thinking of going a few rounds with the guys,” Jerrold said wryly. “Your daughter is quite a woman, Robert.”

  “I know,” he man said with a whimsical smile. “Her mother was like that as well.” He hesitated as he looked at Jerrold. “You are going to have to make a grand gesture to get her to listen to you I am afraid. She has been hurt too many times once by someone like you in high school and now again. She is not going to be pretty forgiving.”

  “That’s what I am afraid of,” Jerrold said bleakly. “But I am going to find a way.”

  Chapter 11

  Noelle toed off her sneakers wearily and dropped down onto the sofa in the living room. She was drained, physically and emotionally, and was not sure coming back had been such a good idea after all! She had had to sit there massaging a middle aged woman’s feet as she complained about not getting enough alimony settlement from her third husband and how she had just spent an hour browsing through the diamond section of a very exclusive jewelry store and not finding the particular diamond she wanted. Noelle had only just managed not to tell her that she was a spoiled bitch who needed to see real suffering in the world! But she had listened and made the necessary vague comment, almost not accepting the tip that the woman had so graciously left for her. She was not sure how much longer she could do this, and she was thinking of maybe quitting and going somewhere for a week or two just to cool off and consider her options. She was two months pregnant and the nausea was coming fast and hard! She was ill most of the time and could not for the life of her keep anything down! She had enough money saved up to stop working for a little bit, but no one was going to hire her when they realized that she was pregnant and she refused to get in touch with Jerrold. She did not want him to come to her in pity. Her conscience nagged her and she could hear her dad’s voice inside her head telling her that she was wrong in not telling him that he had a child on the way. She was not ready yet, she was still dealing with the hurt he had caused her and she was not ready to tell him yet.

  She jumped as her phone started ringing and taking it out of her pocket she looked at the screen and realized that it was her dad. She had seen the calls from Jerrold and had ignored them and to her relief he had not called back in a couple of days. “Dad.”

  “How are you, honey?” His voice was solicitous and she was careful not to sound how tired and dejected she was.

  “A little tired but coping.”

  “Jerrold came to see me earlier and asked me where you were.”

  “You did not tell him, did you?”

  “I was tempted to. He said he wanted to make up for the hurt he caused, honey, and I think you should let him. It is not only the two of you involved, there is a baby as well and you need the support.”

  “I am not ready,” she said stubbornly.

  “He loves you.”

  Her heart thumped inside her chest. “Did he tell you that?”

  “He did not have to. The man is clearly suffering.”

  “I will call him when I am ready.”

  “I know you are punishing him-”

  “I am not punishing him, Dad, I am trying to deal with some things and I am not ready to face him yet.”

  “You are letting your past win.”

  “Maybe I am, but right now that is the way it has to be.”

  “Okay, honey, you know I am in support of you.”

  “Thank you.”

  She finished talking to him and rested her head back against the cushions, closing her eyes wearily. She was going to have to tell him. She was carrying his child and even if they did not end up together he had a right to know. He was Jerrold Littman and she knew what that meant! He was a man of means and if he wanted to fight her for the child, she would not stand a chance! But she was sure it would not come to that!

  *****

  But Jerrold made the grand gesture that turned things around! He agreed to the interview that the many different talk show hosts had been clamoring for him to accept and he had selected the one he knew would guarantee to get her attention. Robert Buckner had told him that it would be up to him to make her want to listen to him and he was going to do just that. He was going to make a very public apology and declaration of love!

  Jerrold settled back in the very comfortable chair as he faced the audience. It was being televised live in the afternoon on a Wednesday and he had told Robert about it, knowing that he would tell her that he would be on TV.

  “Jerrold Littman!” Paula Stephenson said graciously as she turned slightly to make eye contact with the very famous basketball player. “I cannot begin to tell you what a treat it is to have you on my show today.”

  “Thank you for having me,” he told her with a charming smile.

  “We have a lot to discuss in so short a time, but I am going to make the most of it. I want to personally tell you however how very thankful I am that you survived an accident of that magnitude and overcame the result of it. You walked in here without any aid at all and we are very grateful for that,” the sleek blonde talk show host told him with a smile.

  “I am very grateful for the second chance as well, Paula, and also thankful for the support I received during that time.”

  She nodded and glanced at her notes and then at the teleprompter. “There have been rumors floating around that you are planning to hang up your basketball shoes and more rumors of the many endorsements coming your way. I heard that a certain giant shoe industry has offered you a million-dollar deal to create something with your name on it. Michael Jordan has done it as well as several other famous athletes. I also heard about that Romano’s, that very famous clothing brand, is going to be designing clothes with your name on them. How true is all this and what do you plan on doing with your free time?”

  Jerrold laughed and considered for a moment. “So many questions, I am really wondering which one to address first.”

  “No particular order, darling, we just want them answered,” Paula said with a teasing smile.

  “I did plan on retiring from the sport. As you all know, I have been playing basketball since I was about ten years old and I love the sport! I eat, sleep, and think about basketball every day, but there comes a time when you have to bow out gracefully and I think the time has come.”

  “Have you been back on the court since you have recovered?”

  He nodded. “Just for practice and aside from feeling the muscles in my leg weakening a little bit, I have been doing pretty well.”

  “So, are you planning on participating in any of the upcoming matches?”

  “I am not sure yet. I have something personal to take care of and I want to see where I go from there
.”

  “What about the endorsements?”

  “Yes, I have been approached by some people and we are still in the negotiation stages. That’s all I can say on the matter for now.”

  Paula Stephenson stared at the ruggedly handsome player for a moment before she posed her next question. She had done her research but had not come up with anyone Jerrold Littman was involved with which was surprising considering his looks and his immense wealth. She had seen him with women in the past so she was pretty sure he was not gay, but one could never tell!

  “I am sure your fans as well as the people in the audience and myself want to know about that special person in your life. Is there one or are you still searching?”

  Jerrold took his time answering and when he did he stared straight into the camera. “There is someone,” he began quietly. “A wonderful and exquisitely beautiful woman who was there for me during the time I was recovering and I very foolishly pushed her away. I am not going to reveal her name because I do not want to do so without her permission. I am using this opportunity to publicly tell her how sorry I am and that I was a jerk, but I want to make it up to her.”

  Paula stared at the man in fascination! “Well!” She looked around at the audience. “I am sure after hearing this that there is no way she can stay mad at you. Is there anything else you want to say to her?”

  He nodded. “I want to tell her that I love her and I will do whatever it takes to get her to see that and for her to come back into my life. I want to let her know that ever since she left, life for me has been bleak and the sunshine has gone out of the day. I want her to know that if given another chance I promise that I will never hurt her that way again.”

  *****

  Noelle was rooted to the spot as she watched the entire program. Her father had called her this morning to tell her that Jerrold was going to be giving an interview and what time. She had taken off from work to watch it in the privacy of her living room and had found herself staring at his beloved face, memorizing ever feature and lingering on his mouth, a mouth that had sent such ecstasy spiraling through her body! She had watched him walked on stage without the slightest limp and had felt relieved that he had recovered so much, but she had heard progress reports from her dad. It had taken a few minutes for her to really listen to the interview and had found herself engrossed in the conversation. He was ruggedly handsome, his tall muscular frame in tan trousers, rust-colored shirt, and a seemingly casual brown sports jacket. His dark hair was brushed back from his forehead and his cobalt blue eyes crinkled in amusement as he answered the woman’s questions. That was the Jerrold she had known, that was the man who had been bent on drawing her out, the man who had told her that he wanted a relationship. She went rigid with shock as he turned his eyes to the camera and knew before he even spoke that he was talking to her and when she heard what he had to say, she felt the tears coming down her cheeks! She could not avoid him any longer! She had to go to him and tell him that he was forgiven!

  *****

  Going back to Lakeside was very different from the early morning when she had boarded the plane and had had to fight the urge to cry her eyes out! She had called her dad and told him she was coming back home and that he should not say anything to Jerrold. “I want it to be a surprise.”

  “I am so happy you are coming, honey,” he had told her in a pleased voice. “Do you want me to come and get you from the airport?”

  “No, I will find my way.”

  “I am looking forward to seeing you, honey.”

  Now hailing a cab at the airport and waiting until the driver stowed her luggage, she realized that she was so excited that her hands were trembling! Spring had come, but the weather was certainly not spring like, still in the high forties even though the sun was shining. Noelle placed her hand against her flat stomach and closed her eyes briefly as she contemplated the life growing inside her, a combination of her and Jerrold’s passionate lovemaking. The thought made her feel warm all over and made her realize that she could not wait to see him. She had no idea what to say to him when she did see him. He had made a public apology on television and had declared his love for her, but he had not called her. That had been two days ago and all the papers had been running the story of Jerrold Littman’s mystery woman and the identity of that woman!

  “You are here, miss.” The driver’s voice jerked her from her reverie and with a smile she dug into her pocketbook and paid him the fare. He opened the door and took out her cases, nodding as he made his way back into his vehicle. She was staying at her dad’s place because she had given up her apartment and taking up her cases she pushed open the gate and made her way inside, locating the key where she knew it always was. First, she was going to make some tea to quiet her stomach and then get a few hours’ nap before she decided the best approach for her and Jerrold.

  *****

  It was during the early afternoon that she called him. Jerrold had spent the past two days waiting anxiously to hear from her, his heart sinking in hopelessness when he had not heard from her. He had been involved in negotiations with Romano’s as well as others and was in the middle of accepting the offers. He was also scheduled to go to Costa Land with the hopes of starting a basketball team there, but he could not do anything until he heard from her. He was sitting at the kitchen counter moodily staring into his wine when his phone rang. His heart slammed into his chest as he realized that it was her. “Noelle?” His voice was hoarse as he waited for her to respond.

  “Hi.”

  “How are you?” His heart was pounding so much in his chest that it was drowning out everything else.

  “I am okay considering. I am in town.”

  “Where are you?”

  “I am at my dad’s. Can you come over?”

  “Right away,” he told her huskily. “Noelle?”

  “Yes?”

  “Did you see the interview?”

  “I did.”

  He waited for her to say something else and squelched his disappointment when she remained silent. “I will see you in a few minutes.”

  *****

  Noelle was nervous and the anticipation of seeing him for the first time after almost a month was making her pace the length of the small living room. She could have suggested that they meet at his place, but she wanted to control the dialogue to a point. She had told her dad that he was coming over and he had decided to go to have dinner at Marjorie’s place. So she had showered and put on black leggings and a thick black sweater, brushing her hair and leaving it loose around her face. She had lost weight because of her inability to keep anything down and it showed in the fine bones of her face but did nothing to detract from her beauty. She heard when his vehicle pulled up at the gate and heard when he got out and closed the door behind him. She closed her eyes briefly and waited until she heard his footsteps on the steps before going to the front door. When he rang the bell, she opened the door. They stood there staring at each for a moment before she stepped aside for him to enter. He shrugged out of his coat and handed it to her and she hung it up on the hook just inside the doorway. Neither of them said anything until they went into the living room.

  “It’s good-”

  “I am so happy-”

  Both of them started talking at the same time!

  “You go first,” Noelle said as she took a seat on one of the single sofas, forcing him sit across from her. He had wanted to crush her into his arms the moment she had opened the door but had sensed the aloofness immediately and had decided to wait.

  He clasped his hands between his legs and stared at her, his eyes going over her face hungrily, a frown knitting his brows as he realized that she had lost weight. “Are you okay?”

  She shrugged, not yet ready to share the news. “Working a little too hard. It’s good to see that you are back to normal.”

  “I have even managed to hold up during practice,” he told her with a smile, his eyes concerned as he stared at her. Was he the cause why she had lost we
ight, he thought with a pang.

  “You are back on the team?”

  He shook his head. “Just by the way of keeping in shape. I have decided that I am ready to give it up.”

  “I thought you had changed your mind about that.” She looked away from him. “When you were ill, you said-”

  “Please, don’t repeat it.” His tone was tense and when she looked at him she saw the pain on his face. “I said some pretty damaging things and I hurt you in the process.” He closed his eyes briefly. “I am sorry, Noelle.”

  “I know,” she said softly.

  “Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?” he asked her humbly.

  She nodded.

  He let out a gusty sigh. “I meant every word I said in the interview. I love you and I want us to start over if you will let me.”

  “There is something I have to tell you,”

  “What is it?”

  She took a deep breath and got up from her seat, going over to the window. She had spent her childhood in that very house with the picturesque view of the large oak tree at the front of the yard and had sat in the garden complete with the scent of daffodils in her nostrils as she read her books or studied for an exam. She turned back to face him. “We did not use anything when we-” She gestured with her hands and then continued. “We never talked about wanting children or anything like that.”

  Jerrold got to his feet slowly, his shoulders tensed as he stared at her. “Noelle, what are you saying?”

  Her eyes met his. “I am two months pregnant.”

  Noelle chafed under the silence and the intensity of his cobalt blue eyes and when she could not bear it anymore he spoke. “You are pregnant with my child.” His voice was hoarse.

  “Yes. I don’t know how you feel-” She broke off with a gasp as he strode over and hauled her into his arms! His arms were like steel bands around her waist as he held her to him, his body shuddering against hers, his heart thundering inside his chest. He never dreamt that something like this could happen! He eased her away from him and peered down at her. “How are you?”