The Sinful Secret 0f A Broken Earl (Historical Regency Romance)

by Lucinda Nelson

  She was sure that he’d been avoiding her, because when they passed in the hallway he wouldn’t even speak. He’d just incline his head, without meeting her eye directly.

  Without Alicia, Maggie had nothing to do. During the first four days, she just sat in her bedroom, twiddling her thumbs. She went to see Joseph a couple of times, but always found him busy. By the fifth day, Maggie felt like she was going stir crazy.

  The sun was shining, so she decided to go outside and do some reading. The book she chose from the library was the one Alicia had shown her; Le Mort D’Arthur. She’d read it before, but it had been such a titillating text that she wanted to go over it a second time.

  Maggie found a nice little spot beside the lake, where she’d found Alicia, and sat on the shore with the book balanced on her upraised knees.

  She sat there for about an hour, before she heard the sound of someone approaching. Maggie looked up when she heard the rustle of the trees, to see Alicia and Henry stepping out, hand in hand.

  “Maggie!” Alicia cried, enthusiastically. She let go of her father’s hand so that she could run towards Maggie. “You’re reading it,” she said, beaming from ear-to-ear. Maggie had never seen Alicia so happy. Her father’s company was doing her a world of good.

  “I am,” Maggie said, smiling. “It’s wonderful.”

  Alicia grinned, then looked back at her father. “Do you see, papa?”

  “I do, sweetheart,” Henry answered, as he stepped further into the sunlight. His cheeks had tanned in the last five days, from spending so much time outside. “Good day, Miss Riley,” he said, politely.

  Why did his voice make her heart skip a beat?

  “Good day, Lord Rivers. You seem well.”

  “I am.” Their eyes held for a moment, before Henry looked down at his daughter and put his hand out towards her. “Come, Alicia, let’s not disturb Miss Riley.”

  Please don’t leave.

  Since her parents had died, Maggie had to give up all her friends, to keep them from learning the truth of their circumstances. She’d had no one to talk to for the longest time. And though she and Henry had had so few pleasant interactions, she didn’t want him to go. She craved his company.

  “You’re not disturbing me,” she blurted out. She stood, holding the book to her chest.

  “Can’t she join us, papa?” Alicia asked. “I’d like her to.”

  Henry hesitated for a moment, looking at Maggie as if he was considering her merit. “Alright,” he said, at last. It surprised her. She didn’t think he’d say yes. After all, he’d been avoiding her for the past several days.

  “Can I go swim?” Alicia asked, already pulling off her shoes.

  “You can paddle,” Henry answered. “In the shallows.”

  This was more than enough to satisfy Alicia. With her curls springing around her head, she ran towards the shoreline and wriggled her toes in the water. She was close enough that they could keep an eye on her, but far enough away that they could speak without being heard.

  Not that they had anything to talk about. Henry sat down beside her, keeping an appropriate distance between them. He took off his jacket, so that he was only in a loose fitting white shirt and navy trousers. It was unusual to see him this way. Sitting beside a lake, looking out at the water. His eyes were brighter than usual, if that was possible.

  She wondered if he was happy.

  “You’re staring at me,” he noted.

  Maggie whipped her face around to look at the water again, blushing furiously. “I’m sorry.”

  “Why were you staring?”

  “No particular reason.”

  He didn’t look as if he believed it. He was staring at her with an arched brow. “I was just thinking…” she replied, slightly hesitantly. “That you seem happier.”

  Henry nodded slowly, but didn’t say anything.

  “Are you?” She pressed.

  He shrugged his shoulder up and returned his eyes to Alicia. “I suppose.”

  Maggie’s brow lifted. “You suppose?”

  His lips quirked at the edges. Was that a smile? It was. The barest of smiles, but a smile nonetheless. It was so unusual that it made Maggie start to smile too, but she didn’t press him on the matter. She just enjoyed what felt like peacefulness between them and looked up at the clouds.

  Alicia was happy playing in the water and would occasionally shout back at them that she’d found a pretty pebble, or she’d seen a fish. It was so easy to share in her joy.

  “Jeremy hasn’t visited in a while,” Henry noted, breaking her train of thought. Maggie didn’t want to talk about this. For a short while, she’d forgotten about the decision she had to make, and she’d just been enjoying herself.

  As always, it was short-lived.

  “No,” she said. “I asked him not to.”

  Henry turned his head suddenly and gawped at her. “You asked him what?”

  Maggie expelled a soft breath. “I asked him to give me some space to think.”

  “To think about what?” His voice sounded urgent, and she could feel his temper mounting. She wished she could turn back time and experience that quiet moment between them again.

  It was time to tell him. She knew that, but she was afraid of what he would say. She pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. She watched her bare toes move in the grass.

  “I think he’s going to ask me to marry him,” she confessed, without looking up at him.

  In the wake of her admission, silence reigned between them. She daren’t look up at his face, because it would surely be stony and furious. But she couldn’t hide forever.

  Tentatively, she looked up.

  But he didn’t look angry. His face seemed to have fallen, his brows were knitted together, and his lips were faintly parted. “He’s going to ask to marry you…” he breathed. “Are you sure?”

  Maggie nodded slowly, trying to read his expression.

  “I thought you should know,” she said. “Before I give my answer.”

  “And do I have any say in what that answer might be?”

  Maggie didn’t answer. For a long while, they sat in silence. She wondered what he was thinking about and what he would say next. “You’re going to say yes,” he said, at last.

  Maggie put her forehead against the tops of her knees. “I don’t know. That’s the trouble.”

  Henry frowned. “I thought this was what you wanted, Miss Riley.”

  “It’s what I need, my Lord” she corrected. She turned her head against her knees so that her cheek rested against them, and she could look up at him. “I can’t decide if it’s what I want.”

  “He’s a good man, as you said.” Henry sounded extremely confused, which she could understand. Why wouldn’t she want to marry Jeremy?

  “He is,” she said. “A very good man, I think.”

  “Then… is it what I said?”

  Maggie frowned at him and lifted her head. “I thought you’d encourage my hesitancy.”

  His mouth opened to say something, but he was silent.

  “Do you want me to marry Jeremy?” She asked. The question felt weighted and important, but she wasn’t sure why. She held her breath as she waited for his answer.

  “No,” he blurted, with renewed force. “No, I don’t. I just don’t understand why you’d hesitate.”

  Maggie shrugged up her shoulder. “I guess I always imagined being in love with the man I chose to marry. It was a luxury I could afford to expect before our misfortune. But I suppose that’s not the case anymore.”

  Henry didn’t speak. He seemed to be waiting for her to go on. “Can I ask you something, my Lord?” She murmured, lowering her eyes shyly. It was a difficult question to ask, because she thought that his answer might be cruel, but she needed to ask it anyway.

  “You may, Miss Riley.”

  “Do you think he loves me?”

  Out of the corner of her eye, she saw his face harden. It was a long time before he must
ered an answer. She expected it to be cutting, but when he spoke his voice was strangely gentle. “I think he will, one day.”

  “Why me? I’m sure there are better women for him out there.”

  Henry released a long breath. “He’s always favored the unconventional. I think he sees that in you.”

  “Is that all?” Maggie asked, her brows drawing together. “Shouldn’t there be more than that?”

  “I don’t know, Miss Riley” Henry admitted. His face looked almost forlorn. She would have given anything to know what thoughts were going through his mind just then.

  “Were you in love with your wife, my Lord?” She heard herself say these words, though she’d no intention of speaking them aloud. Once they were out, she knew that she’d almost certainly overstepped the line.

  “I suppose you know about her,” he replied, with a bitter smile.

  “I heard that she left…” Maggie answered, softly.

  Henry nodded. “I loved her more than I could stand at one time,” he confessed. Hearing that made her heart tighten painfully, which she couldn’t explain. She wanted to call it sympathy, but she knew there was more to it than that. “But it was a farce. In the end, she wasn’t who I thought she was. The woman I loved didn’t exist. Not really.”

  It felt surreal to hear him speak like this. Lord Henry Rivers, who’d only ever treated her with contempt and coldness. She’d always felt, in her gut, that there was more to him. That he was a mystery waiting to be solved. And for the first time, he was beginning to prove that to be true.

  He had a heart after all.

  “I’m sorry…” she whispered. “That she left. You didn’t deserve that.” With those final words, Henry looked up at her. His eyes were shining in the light, and he looked so struck by what she’d said that she wondered if anyone had ever told him that before. That he didn’t deserve it.

  God, he was handsome. She didn’t want to think it, but she couldn’t help herself. The curve of his jaw, his high cheekbones and – above all – his eyes. They made her feel seen, for once. Entirely seen.

  She didn’t know what she was doing until she’d already done it. Her body leaned in until their shoulders brushed. Her eyes slipped closed, and she found his lips. They were as soft as she remembered, but they didn’t taste like liquor anymore.

  For an instant, she forgot where they were and simply cupped the back of his head, breathing him in through her nose and kissing him with utter tenderness.

  “Papa!” Alicia shouted this just before she turned around. It was warning enough; Maggie and Henry practically leapt away from each other, just as Alicia spun to face them. She was carrying a green pebble that she’d found, holding it up to the sunlight. “Look!”

  Henry stood and put distance between Maggie and him, clearing his throat as he went towards his daughter. He took the stone and held it up so he could look at it. “Incredible,” he said, with a smile.

  When Alicia took the pebble back, Henry stole a glance over his shoulder. Maggie met his gaze for a moment, then looked away.

  Oh God… what had she done?

  Chapter 17

  Lord Henry Rivers, Earl of Radingley

  When she kissed him, it all came flooding back. The kitchen, the way he’d touched her, the heat and the passion between them. It seemed impossible that he’d ever forgotten it, because it had perhaps been one of the most intense sexual experiences of his life.

  Feeling her lips, experiencing her subtle taste again, was like a kick to the gut. It woke him up, and yet he felt plunged into a dream all at once.

  Maggie Riley had kissed him. All this time, he’d thought she felt nothing but scorn and disdain for him. And then she’d kissed him, of her own accord.

  The moment was shattered when Alicia called for him. They threw themselves away from each other, each of them red in the face and trying to pretend nothing had happened. Thankfully, Alicia seemed to be oblivious. While Henry looked at the pebble she brought to him, he could feel Maggie’s eyes on his back, sending a shiver down his spine.

  He looked back at her, just for an instant, and when their eyes met it felt like she was kissing him again. It felt like a storm. Henry swallowed and looked back down at his daughter. “Perhaps we should head back to the house,” he suggested. “You must be getting tired.”

  Alicia’s face fell. “I’m not tired,” she complained. “Not at all.”

  Henry smiled at her and leaned down to kiss her forehead. “Nonetheless, I think it’s time we went home.” In part because it was getting late, and in part because he couldn’t spend another moment with Maggie while his daughter was around. They clearly had an important matter to address, which couldn’t be done in the presence of a child.

  Alicia conceded and the three of them walked back to the house together. It felt like a long walk. His lips were still tingling from her kiss. Maggie didn’t speak a word during the walk. She kept her head low, but he could see that her cheeks were flaming red.

  When they reached the house, Henry had every intention of sending Alicia straight to bed and stealing a few moments alone with Maggie. He managed to get Alicia to head upstairs with Beatrice, but before he could ask Maggie to come to his study, Alfred entered the room.

  “My Lord, your sister is here.”

  “Here? Now?” To say that Henry was surprised was an understatement. After the way he’d behaved when he’d last seen his sister, it seemed ludicrous that she would come visit him. When she’d declared her intention to do so, he’d thought that she was just trying to be kind.

  As if summoned by his confusion, Rachel stepped out of the drawing room, with a wide smile on her face. “Hello, Henry.” She came towards him and kissed each of his cheeks. “It’s so good to see you again.”

  Though it was good to see her too, it thwarted Henry’s intention to speak to Maggie alone. As Rachel kissed him, he looked around and saw that Maggie was trying to sneak upstairs.

  Not a chance.

  “Miss Riley,” he called. She looked like she flinched when she heard her name.

  Slowly, she turned to look at him. “Yes, my Lord.”

  “Come meet my sister.”

  Maggie hesitated on the stairs, which almost made Henry smile. After several moments, she descended, because she didn’t really have a choice. “Good day, my Lady,” Maggie said, with a deep curtsy. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

  “And you too, I’m sure,” Rachel said, brightly. “And who is this, Henry?”

  “This is Alicia’s governess. Miss Magdalene Riley.” Henry explained. He didn’t take his eyes off Maggie as he spoke.

  “She’s a wonderful child, isn’t she, Miss Riley?”

  “She is,” Maggie answered. Even though she looked uncomfortable, Henry could see that she was telling the truth when she said that. Maggie liked his daughter. And, apparently, she liked him too.

  Had he been alone, Henry would have smiled at the thought.

  “Shall we have dinner?” Henry suggested.

  “I’m famished,” Rachel answered. Again, Maggie turned and tried to disappear upstairs. But before she made it even a step, Henry said, “You must join us.”

  “Yes, quite,” Rachel answered. “I’d like to hear how Alicia’s doing.”

  “Oh no, I wouldn’t like to impose,” Maggie blurted, her eyes flashing between Rachel and Henry. It was a strange request. He understood that. But he didn’t want to let her out of his sight, and he knew that Rachel had never cared much for propriety.

  “It wouldn’t be an imposition,” Rachel insisted. “Come. I’m sure you’re hungry. Henry works his household staff so hard.”

  Rachel linked arms with Maggie and led her into the dining room. They took their seats, with Henry on one side of the table and the women on the other.

  “You’re usually a great deal more talkative than this,” Henry noted. There was a teasing quality to his face, which clearly aggravated her. She fixed him with an inscrutable stare and narrowed her eyes. />
  “You must pardon me,” she replied. “I am not used to joining Lord Rivers for dinner.”

  “I am sure that not many people are,” Rachel answered, with a laugh. “When was the last time you had a guest, Henry?”

  “Lord Crawley comes quite regularly actually.”

  “Lord Crawley doesn’t count. He’s practically your brother. Handsome fellow though, is he not?”

  Was every woman smitten with the man? Henry tried not to grimace, while Rachel went on. “Have you met him, Miss Riley?”